Epi 79 Ch 9 Do Advay and Miku also have a PTSD of their own???

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The loving doves were at the shop exit; their frames outlined by the dusky twilight. The Sun had lingered on the west horizon colouring the skies in a plethora of colours. Between the two pairs of eyes, a plethora of emotions were being exchanged without any words. There was love, there was care; there was expectation dueling with demand. Both were saying,

You touched my heart , that touched my soul; 

now in my life, you hold an important role.  

She wondered how the day had been like? Starting with a beautiful moment between them and then going on an emotional roller coaster till this downward track again. Could this not be different? A simple act of his being with her would have kept her floating in her heaven. She started shivering slightly again. Moisture glistened in her eyes. 

" Won't you come home with me?" She urged him.

He cupped her face. "No Chandani. I won't!... Chandani, tum meri Annapoorna ho, meri Parvati ho, meri Shakti ho... par ab tumhe apne liye Durga banana hai ! You have to conquer your fears by yourself." 

(You are My Annapoorna, My Parvati, My Shakti...... but now you have to become Goddess Durga for your own sake.)

Just then Advay's security-in-charge Mr. Mishra approached them. 

" Chandani, you enjoy carrying all the bags with your shopping in it, don't you?" Advay asked smilingly. 

In spite of fear stepping closer to her every minute, her reply was chirpy, " Yes Dev, I have enjoyed so much today. I feel so happy. You have bought me so many outfits!"

" So now let Mr. Mishra carry the bags. They will reach home." Advay bent to take bags from her.

" Why? I can carry them." She pulled her bags behind. " I look like an independent girl, don't I?" Chandani was almost child like.

" Yes, you do. But by carrying these bags all the way home, you'll look like just a coolie. I want you to look like Mrs. Chandani Raizada." 

He straightened his frame and brought out his chest to show how he wanted to see her. She smiled at his gesture.

" Mrs. Chandani Advay Singh Raizada... mera poora naam lijiye na!" (Say my full name, na!) She stressed the middle name.

His face broke into open happy smile, "Mrs. Chandani Advay Singh Raizada!" he stressed on the first name. 

"You have to walk till end of this road and then turn right again walk till end. It's our home there. Ok? " 

Chandani was fighting with her tears," Ok."

He held her shoulders, " Chandu... you can do it and you will do it... because I want you to do it!"... 

There was the same encouragement in his voice again as earlier. It built her confidence immediately. She started walking. 

He watched her moving away, then he turned to Mishra," As I told you... sufficient distance from her, but don't let her out of your sight. I am following in my car from behind."

Why could he not come with me? Dev, whom I know, would never ever let me get into any danger. But why am I complaining? He has spent most of the day with me and he does have a huge workload. He has given me enough support already and there is no danger in just walking down the road. He said, I can do it, he wants me to do it. So I will do it.'

Chandani continued her walk. " Don't panic, Bhole ke sainik" 

She started her recital but was not comfy. 

" Dikhate nahi par mere saath hai voh, mere bholenath hai voh!" 

This felt better. She kept reciting it again and again. The road was just a little busy with few people passing on footpath. 

" Come on Chandani. Tu Dev ki Chandu hai! Unaki Bhagyavaan hai. Tujhe kaisa dar?" (You are Chandu of Dev! You are his lucky wife. What's your fear, girl?)

She shushed her frightened heart. She could feel the cool breeze blowing against her face making her hair fly like a silk curtain. Chandani almost started enjoying the walk on Mumbai road.

Suddenly from a side lane, a gang of young college boys came towards Chandani. They were all very boisterous.

Chandani felt the sudden fear starting to grip her. Her shiver increased. Sweat began to form on her forehead. She closed her eyes and thought of Dev. 

" Hamara aaj ka moment yaad karna. Remember our Moment together. I will be with you, near you!" 

His encouraging words came into her ears again. She opened her eyes slowly and kept walking. 

" Mere saath hai voh...Mere saath hai voh " (He is with me) She kept reciting in her heart. To her own surprise, she passed through the boys crowd very safe and sound. She smiled to herself.

Advay in his car a little far behind smiled ,too. He had pulled her out of her trauma earlier. For their better life, it was necessary that she was completely cured of it; even without him around. That was the reason, he had arranged for Diwali shopping and then her going home alone. To his pleasant surprise, she was managing well; though the boys approaching her had been too noisy.

Chandani felt triumphant having reached home. A little behind her, her bags also arrived. 

Naani lovingly welcomed her in the hallway., " How was it, Chandani beta? Did you enjoy the evening?". 

Chandani was beaming, partly due to Dev's time with her and then also due to her own feat achieved for his sake." Yes Nani, it was great fun! I genuinely enjoyed. "

" Is there a woman in this world who doesn't enjoy shopping?" Pooja joined them with her ever present smile. All laughed with her remark.

Just then, Advay strolled in at leisure through the door. Nani was asking Chandani, " Did you buy the red sari as I said? "

" Yes Naani, I did."

" Pahanake dekhi thee tune?" (did you try it on?)

" Yes Nani, I had tried it on"

" Chiku, you tell. Kaisi dikh rahi thi meri bahu?" (how did my daughter in law look in that red saree?)

" Haan... Theek lag rahi thi." (Ya, She looked OK) 

Advay was trying to be nonchalant; though the memory of happenings after the sari trial came back rushing to him. Whatever she wore, she presented her different persona every time. That persona would capture his mind, his heart, his soul everything. She made him feel of wanting to be one with her. His otherwise mathematical mind was getting fast plagued with emotions of love and belonging, all thanks to her.

" Achchi dikh rahi thi, ya bahut achchi... do hi ho sakate hai?" ( She could either look good or look very good.... there can be only two options) Nani was not letting go. 

Chandani chuckled watching Dev's discomfort in answering. He saw her. OK! Bahut hansi aa rahee hai? Find it funny, is it?  Both can play the game.

" Nani, why don't you ask Chandani? She is so good at words and descriptions. You heard her speech today. She'll tell you better." Advay's drawl was honey sweet.

Now it was Chandani's turn to blush completely. Never in life, she could describe in words his love filled, lust filled, possession filled appreciation for her. His eyes had said, 'Come! you are mine and I'll make you mine completely.' 

" haan Naani, I was looking very good, I think." her voice sounded very uncomfortable to her own ears.

" The way you both are shying away, I know you must have looked a bit too good." Naani teased the two. 

Pooja laughed heartily. Chandani wished the earth would swallow her. Naani was too shrewd to hide anything from her.

" Naani, I'll keep the bags in our room" Chandani almost ran from there. Advay felt a little tired. He ordered a coffee for himself.

Chandani ran straight to her room, dropped the bags and stood in front of the mirror. Her reflection in the mirror had the red sari on and her cheeks had already taken the same colour. 

Suddenly, Dev was bending at her shoulders whispering sexily in her ears, " Sari se jyada tumhaare gaal laal ho rahe hain. Inaka kuchh karana padega!" 

( More than the saree, your cheeks look red..... need to something about that!)

" Jaao, Main nahi baat karati tumse. I won't talk to you. " She hid her face in her palms.

" Yes Bhabhi, I can understand that you don't want to talk to me but why hide your face?" Miku walked in, this time eating a banana.

In total shock, Chandani looked up. Dev had suddenly disappeared. She checked in the mirror, there was no red sari on her. It took her a moment to pull herself to reality.

" Khabardaar! Beware! Don't you dare put the banana peel anywhere but in dustbin." Chandani had to change the subject fast.

" OK OK! Relax!" He put the peel in the bin and approached her. "Bhabhi, I am sorry. I am really very sorry." he folded his hands and his voice was about to break. 

For a moment, she mistook his sorry for the banana peel; but then she saw his eyes ... so honest, so very sincere, so deeply repenting! Her soul was moved. She held his hands in love and said, " Pagale! Why are you saying sorry? It was not your fault." 

" Bhaiyya had asked me to take care of you till his return but I failed."

" No mere pyaare Devarjee! You will never ever fail. You are my Laxman to protect your Bhaiyya's Seeta during the exile... my being alone was nowhere your fault. I had myself forced you to go with Shikha. I would never ever blame you."

" Really, you don't Bhabhi? Aapke dil mein mere liye koi gila nahi? You don't have any remorse for me in your heart?" He was almost childlike.

" Koi gila nahi! Nothing whatsoever! But don't fly high in the air now. Who knows, kabhi tum na raho, aur koi Ravan aakar tumhari bhabhi ko utha le jaaye..." (Maybe sometime you are not there and some Ravan kidnaps your sis in law....)

" Chaandani!" Sharp angry voice piercing through the happy air cut her statement totally. 

Chandani and Miku both were shocked seeing Advay so damn upset. Chandani rushed to him. 

" Kya hua? Aap itne naaraj kyun?" (What's the matter? Why are you suddenly so angry?) She urged softly to cool down his temper. 

His eyes were like burning coals, throwing splinters of anger at her.

" You forgot, Chandani! Maa had warned never ever to utter any bad thought!" His voice dripped off pain, anger, frustration.

" Main bhooli nahi, Dev! Voh to main bus yuhin..." (I haven't forgotten, Dev.... Just like that, I said something)

" Whatever!" 

His voice felt like hot coal on her lips... making her voice just vanish... felt like ice block on her heart... making her heart lose all its warmth and shrink in the killing chill.

He moved towards Miku. Miku was dead scared. He searched for censure, for anger in Advay's eyes... but there was none... He felt like he was looking into two oceans... so deep, so very calm from outside but harbouring such turmoil within so as to swallow the whole earth.

" Miku! I had given you some responsibility today."

" Yes Bhaiyya! I know. But it so happened that..." his voice trailed off looking at his brother's eyes.

" Miku you have been lucky that you were too young to sense anything last time. From now on, remember always, life doesn't give a second chance."

" Yes Bhaiyya." Miku had his eyes lowered to Advay's feet.

" Aap use kyon dosh de rahe ho? Usaki koi galati..." (Why are you bearting him? It's not his fault) Chandani tried arbitrating between two brothers.  

Advay's palm came out to restrict her. " Main Apne Bhai se baat kar rahaa hoon!" ( I am talking to my brother!)

Advay went to the bath room and Miku left the room. Chandani felt at total loss now. She had never ever imagined Dev reacting this way. 

She waited at the bathroom door with a towel in her hand. He came out but ignored her. She took his night clothes out and held them in front. He snatched those and threw on the bed. Her shoulders drooped in despair. He lied down on bed and pulled a pillow on his face. 

She couldn't see him like this. " Suniye na...! Listen" she urged again.

" Chandani, leave me alone for some time." 

His voice was so cold cutting that she lost all her hopes. One single sentence from her mouth and all happiness vanished from their interaction! One thing for sure, life would never ever be dull boring with this man! She left for kitchen.

Everybody had gathered at dining except Advay and Veer. Chandani was quietly serving everybody, tears gathering in her eyes. 

Naani said to Murli, " Ja ! Jaake tere Bhaiyya ko bula la. Kah maine aane ko kaha hai. Voh nahi aayega to main bhi nahi khaaoongi." 

(Go! Invite your Brother for meal. Tell him, I have asked him to come. If he doesn't come, then I won't eat either)

"Hua kya hai, Chandani?"( What exactly did happen, Chandni?) Pooja enquired.

" Don't know, Didi. I was just jokingly chatting with Devarjee and he heard a statement of mine and got angry. Sometimes, I don't understand this man."

" Did you ever believe that Advay would be easy to understand? He has so many complex layers to him. We, in spite of having lived with him, don't know him completely yet." Maasi was sardonic.

Just then Murli arrived. Behind him, Advay walked with serious face. He had donned a jacket on. Does he wear so many layers of clothes to hide his pain buried under his multi-layered complexity? Chandani wondered at heart. 

Just then Pooja gestured her to coax Advay with song.

Something had to be done. She would not allow him to sulk during dinner. Chirpily, she said to Naani, "Nani you had a crow crowing on your window sill today?"

" Yes! I thought he would bring some happy news like your speech or your shopping. But somehow it's something different."

Chandani rested her chin on nani's shoulder and started singing,

" Mayee ne Mayee,... Mayee ne Mayee munder pe teri bol raha hai kaga

 Mayee ne Mayee, munder pe teri bol raha hai kaga."  She walked towards her Dev and kept her chin on his shoulder,

" Jogan ho gayee teri dulari, man jogi sang laga!"

Mayee ne mayee munder pe teri ,bol raha hai kaga

jogan ho gai teri dulaariman jogi sang laga."

(Oh! Mother of mine, look on your windowsill , the crow caws..... Your daughter is turning into hermit; because she has fallen in love with a hermit)  

Puja, Adi, Nani, Shikha, Shilpa, Murli all held hands and started dancing in circle around them. Chandani also joined with them.

"chann maahiya chann maahiya mere dhol sipaaiya." 

Chandani came forth again, " Apne tan pe bhasm ramaa ke... Apne tan pe bhasm ramaa ke..." 

( He adorns his body with Ashes.....)

He turned away from her, causing her voice to trail off ; but only to come face to face with Pooja.

Puja stepped forth and hugged her Bhaiyya., " Ab chhod dijiye na gussa, Bhaiyya! Jo bhi hua uspe mitti daal dijiye."

( Now let go of your angry mood. Just bury everything that happened in the past.)

Advay hugged her back, " Can I ever say no to you, Pooja?"  

He smiled and sat in his chair. " Miku nahi aaya?" (Miku hasn't come?)

Nani said taking her seat, " Now in this old age of mine, I have to dance and plead with you young boys. either you...or him! Ek tu aur ek voh! God help me."

Shikha said, " Jiju aap kha lijiye. Use Bhookh lagegi to ruk nahi paayega, aa jayega apne aap." ( Jiju, you eat. Whenever he feels hungry, he will come on his own. No need to bother.)

Advay got up from his seat, " Nahi! No! I'll go and bring him. You guys start. We two will eat together."

Shikha looked at Chandani and gestured a shrug. Chandani was staring at his back frame, " As Maasi correctly said, He is too complex a person to understand." She smiled.

Advay opened Miku's door. Miku was standing at the window his hands clutching the window sill very tightly. He turned with Advay's entry, eyes reflecting pain and agony. 

Advay felt shaken from core and rushed ahead, " Mikuuu..." 

Hearing the love in his brother's eyes, a lone tear rolled down Miku's cheeks. Advay hugged him tightly to his chest. He wanted to embrace all his brother's pain to himself.

" Bhaiyya, I was young then. But do you really believe that I must have sensed nothing? A five year old going from his brother's arms to suddenly an unknown person's arms. I might not remember the pain now; because Ammi Abbu gave me such unconditional love that it made me feel secure, safe.  Yet, that doesn't mean there was no pain!

The memories of the whistle tune always stayed with me and I held onto it like my lifeline. Initially, I must have surely missed all our family. Hai na, Bhaiyya? I must have cried a lot and Ammi must have consoled me then. I must have slept hungry at times crying for you people. Abbu must have put the blanket on me. Maybe because I was very young, the memories later faded out; ...but a sense of loss, I always carried with me in that tune.

Then, there was this locket on me when they found me. It has something written in some Sanskrit or such old language. From that they guessed that I was Hindu and brought me up as Hindu. I always knew that I wasn't their own child. You understand my loneliness to not know who my parents were, whom did I belong to?"

Tears were rolling down freely Advay's eyes. , " haan mere Bhai... haan! Yes, My Bro! I am sorry! I got angry at you."

"No Bhaiyya, please don't say that. You have every right. I had failed your given responsibility...Bhaiyyan, if I were to grow under you, grow with you... would I also be like you? Very responsible?...  Like a rock strong support whom one can completely lean on. Would I be like that?" There was sparkle in Miku's eyes.

" You are like that, Miku! You are the chip of the same old block, Bro. You are very much like me." Advay wiped Miku's cheeks and patted them. "Same as me you have suffered pain, agony. Same as me, you'll conquer life one day and reach beyond the skies. I have my full faith in you, mere Bhai. You'll find your potential one day."

" Bhaiyyyaa, pleaaase! No potential talk when our tummies are not filled. Come let's go and eat." Miku was back to his regular self.

Both joined the family at the dining table hand in hand. Advay looked at Chandani waiting for him to return. Both smiled. Their eyes were at peace again.

" Chandani, mujhe kaam hain. I have work , you go to sleep. Tum so jana. Good night, everybody. Miku , sleep well, mere Bhai. "Advay spoke as he got up after dinner.

" Good night, Bhaiyya. I will." Miku smiled at Advay. There was peace.

Chandani was cleaning the kitchen platform. Shilpa had already done it, a little earlier. Yet, Chandani was never satisfied till she did all the cleaning again herself. 

"He always does this. Perfect Insomniac! Even before marriage, he called me to his room so late at night. And though I felt like a machchhar(mosquito), I obeyed him and went to his room. 

Aur kya karavaya mujhse? Murga banane ko kaha and he made me write sorry hundred times.. ( And what did he make me do? He made me take the cock pose)

Likkhe meri jooti! My foot! But when he made me Murga; he was my Dev, wasn't he? He never really punished me or let any harm come on me... Doesn't this man ever sleep? Why take up work at night? That too, after marriage?... "Chandani was constantly muttering.

" Chandani? Bhabhi, tum kya badabada rahi ho khud se?" Pooja came in to fill her bottle for night. ( What are you muttering with yourself?)

" Kya karu, Didi. Bachapanse aadat hai. Aur dekhiye na!(What to do, Didi? It's my habit since childhood, And just see,) Your bhaiyya is not finishing his work. It's so late and I am so tired after the long day."

" Why are you waiting for him? He's always like that. I told you already, he works very late. You have taken one odd habit of not eating without him and fainted already... Now if you start keeping awake till he finishes work, you'll surely faint again. Go and sleep fast. He'll come. You'll anger him unnecessarily, if you keep awake; when he has asked you to sleep. As such he was angry earlier, right?"

Pooja literally pushed Chandani out of the kitchen. Dragging her feet, Chandani went to her room. She changed and lied down on bed. Her heart felt like having a burden of hundred stones on it. She just couldn't sleep. She kept turning and twisting. Sometimes, pulling the cover on her head... little later kicking it away. She pulled the pillow on her head and buried her face in it. This wait was killing. She wanted to howl; but she pushed the cover in her mouth. Why had he not yet come?

Pooja on her way back had peeped into her bhabhi's room and noticed her restlessness. She went to her room. Patted Adi lovingly and straightened the blanket on him. Then she messaged her bro, " Working late was Ok before marriage. Now you must remember that somebody waits for you."

Advay saw the text and smiled. He closed his laptop. It was pretty late. Entire household had gone to sleep. He went to his room. Chandani had  curled up into a ball with a pillow on her face. 

Love swelled in his heart. He went and slept next to her, putting his strong arm around the curled up ball. Chandani straightened immediately and turned towards him. She rubbed her face against his chest. 

His hold tightened around her. " You didn't sleep, baby?" 

" You know very well, I can't sleep without you by my side." She was rueful still rubbing her face. His buttons had opened up further leaving more of his body open for her to rub her face on. 

He smiled, " Meri katto Gilheri! You did such great work today, aren't you tired?" 

" I am. But you weren't here. How could I sleep?... You know, I reached home safely today, all by myself. "She told him proudly.

" I know. You are a brave girl... My Durga!" He replied patting on her back. 

" How do you know? You dumped me after the shopping." She rubbed her face on his chest with more vigour. 

He softly kissed her bare shoulders. " No... I was following you from behind." 

" You are lying." She was almost tearful now.  

He cupped her face and tilted her face towards him, " I don't lie, Chandu. You did extremely well, when the noisy boys gang approached you. I am proud of you, my sweetheart." 

His words made her feel at the top of the world. Lovingly she kissed his chest deep and long... then she started unbuttoning him further down. His hand stopped her. 

Her happy face creased immediately." Kya hua? What's the matter?Are you still angry with me? I am sorry for what I said earlier. I promise, I'll never ever say any bad thing again. Please don't be angry at me." She pleaded.

"I am not angry at you any more, Chandu!... It's not about you,Chandu... perhaps it's about me. And you need to catch up on your sleep. Otherwise, you'll fall ill." 

" No, I won't. You like me in western clothes, you said. Shall I wear one and come? Will you like me then?" She urged again. 

He laughed heartily, " No Chandu. It's not like that. I love you in everything that you wear."

Saam Daam Dand Bhed... she had learnt her techniques from Krishna himself. 

" Aap ko Mujhpe pyaar nahi aata?" ( You don't feel the love for me in your heart?)She feigned anger. 

" Do I need to answer that at all, Chandu?" He was being very patient with her, patting her head against his chest, caressing her silky hair spread over her shoulders. Her touch felt so good against him... 

His touch was so soothing for her, she was almost feeling drowsy but she didn't want to give up. It was time for Bhed now!

Her palm against his chest moved to his firm manly breasts. She started working her magic with her seducing caress. 

He held her hand firmly in his palm and pulled it slowly towards his lips. " Seductress! You need sleep. Just take it. I am by your side now." He kissed her fist softly and then just held her against him to sleep comfortably.

Saam Daam Dand Bhed... nothing worked on this man! Kis cheej ka bana hai yeh ladka? ( What is this man made of?)

" Pyaar pe bhi koi ration quota hai kya?" She was rueful. ( Is there some rationing on love quota?)

He laughed at her child like complaint," No my love, there is no quota or rationing on love. You need rest, that's all. Sleep, my darling!" He kissed the silk of her hair... he allowed his kiss to linger...her silky touch to caress and tickle his lips...She drifted off to sleep.

In the very early hours before dawn, she stirred in her sleep and felt something amiss... The weight she had got so used to, the pressure she felt so comfortable with was missing...drowsily she opened her lids... his hold on her wasn't there... she fluttered her eyes open... he wasn't there on the bed. With total shock and worry, she turned around... only to see him against the window... pain agony despair all personified in one frame! 

She got up and went near him. He was clutching his parent's photo frame so tightly that his knuckles had whitened out... He was shivering slightly. She hugged him with love from behind...his shivers increased... she clutched him all the more tightly... as if wanting to embrace his entire storm within her... 

A silent lone tear escaped from his left eye and rolled down onto the glass frame. Slowly, she turned him around and tried taking the frame from his hand. He held onto it; as if his heart was imprisoned inside the frame. 

She pulled him towards the bed and sat down. Then she pulled his head onto her bosom holding it firmly against her softness. She kissed him on his hair, slowly caressing the back of his head. His shivers broke into sobs now. He was crying like a lost child... he was sobbing like a frustrated angry man... while the tears rolled down, his eyes spit out fire.

Pic credit: Neelum Drushti

His outburst was like a tsunami, wave after wave hitting both of them in full force... carrying both in the tide of his agony, "Why did all this happen, Chandu? Why? Why with us? You, Miku and Myself ... why did we have to suffer like this?

You, the love of my life... you suffered the trauma of having lost your best friend without getting any closure from him... I should have been there with you holding your hand but I just couldn't be...

Miku, my younger brother, my biggest responsibility...he suffered the trauma of not getting a sense of belonging... I should have been there acknowledging our blood relation but I bloody hell wasn't.

Chandu... Chandu, maa was burnt alive in front of my very eyes...how did my eyes survive to see anything else after having seen that? She was looking at me helplessly then... I so much wanted to save her; but she told me to run... I had to save Miku. I left her and ran, Chandu... I left my mother alone to burn to death."  

Dev's whole body shook with his pain.  " People think of Advay as successful businessman reaching beyond the skies, but your Dev, Chandu? Your Dev is the biggest failure of the world, Chandu, biggest failure... not been able to fulfil any of his responsibilities."

 "I am done for life, Chandu. I have had enough. I can't take any more now. And then why did you even utter such a thing as some Ravan taking you away? Do you understand at all what happens to me with mere thought like that now? 

If anything... just anything happens to you, do you know what will happen to me? Tell me...because I don't know, what I'll do then. I might just burn down this world like Shiva did... Without Parvati, Shiva was a shava... Without you, I am a dead corpse, Chandu. I am a dead corpse."

She changed position and hid in his heaving chest now howling herself loudly. " I am sorry, Dev. I am sorry. I raked up all this pain back in you again today... I did this every time to you...I didn't want to do it then ... I don't want to do it now...not at all...not in my worst nightmares... how I wish, I could just turn the clock back  and stop all these things from happening to you. None of these pains ever touching my smiling laughing caring Dev."

Both shook heavily with their pains... The stars and the skies throbbed in their tears...  Time stood still as the pain drained out their bodies completely... Lingering Moments froze in their sobs.

After a long time when the waves of agony subsided eventually steadying their bodies, she wiped her tears, pulled her nose and cupped his face. 

" You are not a failure, Dev. You'll never be. I know my Dev. He fulfils every responsibility of his.

We can not change the past, right? Then why should we look again and again at the past? Why can we not move on? Two of us together taking our Miku along. You'll make up for every lost moment of ours, you'll make every dream of ours come true. You will, Dev!"

She slowly took the frame still clutched tightly in his trembling hands. Their joint tears had made an "Abhishek" on the couple in the frame. She wiped it slowly and touched it to her forehead in reverence. Then she kept it on their bedside table. He was watching her, his eyes blood red with all the crying.

She kissed on his lips, her kiss sucking away any residual pain inside him. His hands came around her holding her tight. Their kiss deepened... it was a sealed promise of dreams to come.

It was late already when she woke up. Didi-Shikha must be in the kitchen already, one mind pulled her to step out from the bed. He looks so beautiful in his sleep, my Jogi, my Shiva... just the bhasma(Ashes) missing, she smiled, the other mind tugging her to linger in his arms. Life can get really complicated, she smiled to herself.

Much later he woke up. She must be in the bath, he thought drowsily imagining her body in the shower, devoid of any clothing. With the mere thought, blood started gushing in his lower body. He squinted open his eyes, she was bending against the recliner with her back to him, putting his things neatly ready for him. 

She and her OCD! He shook his head. But then his eyes fell on her butts. He watched admiringly their full round shape. He felt his hardening getting very tight. Her position was inviting him, challenging him, goading him. Would a man not rise to such a call! He threw his covers away and pressed his hardness directly against her body cupping her bosoms in his large palms. 

" haaah!" her breath sucked sharply in and her mouth opened loud, she was so boggled at his direct sensuous attack. 

She straightened immediately and pushed his hand away. " Vakt dekha hai? Kabhi bhi shuru ho jaate hain! (Have you checked the time? You start anytime of the day!)

Didi is waiting for me in the kitchen. You get ready fast now. It's getting very late." Before he could understand anything, she was out of the room, her cheeks aflame red.

In few minutes, the staff came in bringing his morning tea. He had it and sent out message for Chandani to come to the room as he needed something urgent. Then he went for his bath stepping under hot shower. The water felt so good on his now rested body.

She was outside the bathroom door shouting above the noise of the shower whether he needed something. 

He opened the door standing in front of her allowing her full view of his being hot sex god full of raw masculinity.

" haaah!" (yes!)

She gaped wide open once again sucking her breath sharply in. 

" Tum!"(You!) He broke her stance. 

" Kya?" (what?)She was still not in her senses. She had not heard him right perhaps. 

He reached out and held her by her arm, whispering huskily, " Tum." (You) 

He pulled her inside with him," Kyonki pyaar pe koi ration nahi hai!"(There is no rationing on lovemaking) 

He closed the door behind him.

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The beautiful love song used by Chandni to coax Advay. 

The verse depicts the love song between Parvati and Shiva when he was in his Hermit stage and refused to accept Parvati's love.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYAtU1gGSps

Context: Saam Daam Dand Bhed 

This is management strategy explained in ancient Indian Scriptures. It's the four stages in Negotiation management

Saam- A simple Genuine request to get what you need.

Daam- Some payment or bartender exchange to get to agree for what you need.

Dand- Threaten with punishment , fight, argue for what you need

Bhed- if your task remains un achieved , then conspire against the person, cheat him and take what you want.

This episode opens on Advay's healing process for Chandni's PTSD, a very important step in their mutual relation. 

Then it moves on to opening another layer in Miku, always happy go lucky, our loved character. 

Further, Dev bears his soul to Chandani and Chandani's healing process for Dev. It's so important that both have suffered in their past and both love each other enough to be able to heal the other person.

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