Chapter 30
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[MEMBERSONLY]
sorry...sorry for late update... actually i wrote this update last week..then deleted it...then wrote it again..then edited it...then re-edited it...then re-re-edited...and finally posting it today...i never post till iam satisfied...well iam still not fully satisfied..but i thought something is better than nothing...
the problem is i got lost with story..this chapter is supposed to come two chapters later...but i realized that left-out two chapters wont do anything to arhi relationship except to fry my readers brain wit cliff hanger...though i didnt compromise with my story line..i skipped those chapter...
sorry if it is not that good...will surely make up for it in next chapter...i already started typing next one when i got struck up with this one...it's kushi's birthday...so you might get update on christmas
CHAPTER 23 - PART B
You come to love not by finding the perfect person, but by seeing an imperfect person perfectly.
-Sam Keen
Arnav stood still even without battling his eyelids, his gaze fixed on the girl with whom his sister and grandmother were talking. Her pale and tired face clearly explained her health condition. This is the third time she had fainted today. The doctor who examined her informed them that her blood pressure was dangerously below the normal rate.
Dark circles have formed below her eyes. He concluded that she is still feeling giddy and that's why she is nodding her head slowly to whatever devyani and Anjali says. He was sure that she is not paying any attention to them but simply nodding. He knew that she isn't in need of any advice now and he also knew what she needs right now.
"Di, nani." Arnav called out loudly, grabbing everyone's attention except his wife's. "You both go and sleep. I will... take care of Kushi." he announced, this time successfully grabbing his wife's attention. Devyani and Anjali tried to argue against his decision seeing kushi's condition but arnav's firm gaze stopped them. He walked to the door to close it as Anjali and devyani walked out of the room.
He heaved a sigh as he closed and latched the door. Not even three days has been passed since he had confessed his love; since she had accepted her love for him; since they had made love. He remembered how she hugged him and said those three magical words again that night. But he was not able to respond either to her hug or to her words.
He turned to witness her accusing eyes. Yes, he was responsible for her current state. He ignored her completely for past three days even though he knew that it will hurt her as much as it hurts him. However he couldn't do anything. He tried to act normal. But the fact that she is lying to him and not trusting him enough was killing him in every sense. Her lie was bothering him way too much.
He had no courage to ask her the reason for her lie or to find it on his own. He was scared to find the truth. What if she tells him that she did everything for arjun and there is nothing more between them? What will he do then? He knew that she loves him but what if she lies to him that she doesn't love him? He had no guts left with him to withstand her lie. Her single lie would be end of his life.
He removed her blood pressure tablet from capsule and sat opposite to her before handing the tablet to her. He watched how mechanically she took tablet from him and then gulped it with water. There was no trace of emotion on her face. 'That's it.' He decided. He doesn't care anymore if he gets hurt. It's hurting him more to see her like this.
He caressed her cheek with his thumb. She looked into his eyes in reproaching manner. "I am sorry, Kushi." he said cupping her face and kissed her forehead. "i am really sorry. Please don't cry, Kushi." he requested in alarmed tone as Kushi started to sob. Controlling her sobs and grief, she buried herself in his warm embrace which she had missed for three days.
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Kushi yawned lazily stretching her arms outwards. She withdrew it back immediately as it hit something hard. She turned to see that Arnav was still sleeping and got up carefully not disturbing him. 'He looks so innocent while he sleeps.' She thought looking at him lovingly and that's when it struck her that this is the first time she is seeing him sleeping. 'How strange!' she wondered. She was staying with him for past two months in same room but has never seen him sleeping.
She recalled how he apologized to her last night. She knew that he had found out that she was hiding something from him and that's why ignored her for past few days. She didn't tell him the truth as she was scared of losing him. But now she understood that she will lose him even if she hides the truth. Then she decided that she will tell him everything today and face the consequences.
She was staring at him intently for nearly ten minutes, her mind calculating how to handle the situation in better way. "If you keep staring at me like this, I tell you, I might even start blushing! So please stop staring at me like this!" she heard his husky and sleepy voice. She smiled brightly as he opened his eyes and kissed the air looking at her.
"Arnav..." she emphasized his name complainingly before resting herself on his board chest. He wrapped his arm around her torso instantly and kissed her head whispering "good morning, kushi." she buried her face further on his chest as he requested her to lie down properly. "KUSHI." he called her name angrily warning her. Kushi flinched as if she was given a punishment and pushed him away before laying herself on her back next to him.
Arnav smiled seeing her antics and moved closer to her. Winding his hand around her belly, he hid his face in between her hair and neck. "Sorry sweetheart. Sorry for hurting you again." He said inhaling her aroma. "Why did you do like that Arnav?" though she asked in a low voice, the pain was evident in it. He raised his head to notice that her eyes were filled with angry tears.
He caressed her cheek with his fingers and started to speak. "I am sorry, Kushi. Really sorry. I had no idea what I was thinking or doing. I was just hurt. I figured out that you are hiding something from me. It scared me and thought that you don't trust me enough stabbed my heart..." he shook his head slowly biting his lower lip unable to explain the grief which had engulfed him for past three days.
"You could have asked me that directly. You know talking solves many problems." She whispered wiping his lone tear which was almost ready to fall out of his eyes. "Are you telling me that if i had asked you about this, you would have told me the truth? Really? I thought you would lie. That's why i didn't ask you or else i would have asked it that night itself." he replied with seriousness.
Kushi thought for while and nodded her head in agreement. "You are right. If you had asked me that night, then probably i would have lied." Her voice was low than whisper but was sincere. He got up and sat on bed, nodding his head. "i knew it." He was about to stand up when something got struck in his mind and he turned to her in a second. "What do you mean by you would have lied that night? Are you going to tell me truth now?"
Kushi smiled and sat opposite to him on the bed. "Only if you want me to tell!" Arnav scrutinized her body language as doubt clouded his mind. "Why now...i mean...suddenly...and why not that day?" he blabbered in cautious and suspicious tone but was completely taken back when she leaned forward and kissed him on his lips.
Moving back, she smiled at him and ignoring his bewildered state, she began to talk. "i never thought that i will be able to hear those words from you, at least not in this birth. Thanks for it." She pecked him again before continuing to explain. "That night was very special to me. i was scared to tell you the truth because i was not sure whether i will be able to cope up with your hatred after experiencing your love. I was scared of losing you and your love." She confessed lost in deep thoughts.
"But not anymore." She said in a cynical tone making Arnav to wonder what she was saying. "i am not scared anymore because for past two days i had a feeling that i already lost you. Thanks to you, now i am used to your hatred also." She gave a dry laugh looking at him, making him to feel guilty. When he opened his mouth to apologize, she cut him off.
"Don't say sorry. I badly needed those two days to realise many things. First, I understood that i didn't commit any crime of which i should be guilty. Secondly, yesterday night i realised that you can't hate me." As soon as she finished her last sentence, he raised his eyebrow in surprise. "Even if you can, i know you won't do it."
"Oh really?" he asked with a smirk. She nodded her head cutely before getting up, holding her loose hair in her hand and walked to dresser for clipping it. "it' not like that. You know, i might even hate you!" he spoke in serious tone looking at her through mirror. "You won't." She replied not bothering to turn to him. "What if i really hate you after knowing the truth?" he asked again.
"Then no problem." His eye widened with her causal reply and he repeated her words in disbelief. She walked to him and sat near him. "No problem even if you hate me because i already know how to make you fall for me again!" she winked at him and he muttered 'unbelievable.' Suddenly her face turned serious. He hugged her from side saying "No need to give any explanation, Kushi. Let's just forget it and move on."
"Don't be so good, Arnav. It makes me feel like i had committed biggest sin. Just hear me out." She pleaded him and heaved a sigh when he asked her to go ahead. Silence prevailed in their room as Kushi opened her mouth to say something but closed it eventually every time without uttering a single word. Arnav exhaled heavily seeing her act like a cat on hot bricks.
"It's okay, Kushi." He said loud making her to turn to him. "i am very sure that it was not your mistake. arjun might have manipulated you..." Kushi flinched hearing his words and asked in confusion. "What? Where did arjun came in between?" Arnav gave her 'so-it-is-not-what-i-thought' look. "Wait... you thought I was with arjun? Didn't you?" She heaved angry sigh seeing his reactions and closed her eye to control her fury.
She spoke softly. "You know what, Arnav? After mom died, dad started to behave nicely to me. That day i heard some noise from bar at our house. Arjun and dad were fighting about you. When i opened the door, dad was lying on floor surrounded by pool of blood. I ran to him and then i looked at arjun asking for help. He shuddered his shoulders and walked out as if nothing had happened."
Arnav placed his hand over her's which was clutching the bed spread tightly. She looked at him, her eyes filled with tears. "i could never forget that moment, Arnav. i can never forgive him." She wiped her tears and removed arnav's hand from her's and stood up. "We will talk about it in the evening. Get ready for work." when Arnav tried to say something, she added "iam fine. Just want to be alone."
Arnav cursed himself for misunderstanding her intention yet again.
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"Your mama is home." Kushi said to pia, who jumped in excitement and ran towards the room. Kushi kissed the dove she was holding before letting it free. Her smile grew wider as the bird flew away happily. As she walked towards French doors, she heard pia complaining "mami! Mama has not come home yet."
"He has come." Kushi said looking at the closed doors. They both looked at the door waiting for it to get open. But as they didn't even hear footsteps, pia pleaded "he has not come. Let's go and play with birds. Please mami." She tried to pull kushi towards pool when their room's door got opened and Arnav stepped in. pia looked at Arnav with wide opened mouth.
"What happened, princess?" he asked wondering why pia still didn't welcome him with a hug like she always does. Pia turned to Kushi and questioned seriously "mami, how do you know that mama has come home?" Kushi smiled thinking how can she explain small girl that she can feel arnav's presence and whispered with equal seriousness "because he is my husband."
"oh..." pia gasped before running out to ask her mom about what her aunt has told. Kushi hugged Arnav tightly letting him know that she had missed him whole day. "i have something for you." She said excitedly making him to sit. She brought a box file from closet and handed it to him little nervously. He looked at the file as she sat next to him and began to talk.
"I believed that you betrayed me to take revenge on arjun. My rage on you got multiplied after mom's death. I really hated you that time. When i came to know that i was pregnant, i hated you more. All my dreams got shattered because of you. I couldn't even feel happy for my child that time and you are sole reason for it. I wanted you to feel the pain which i underwent."
"I wanted to destroy you in every possible way. When i entered this house, my intentions were simple. First revealing truth to your conservative nani and di, so that they can disown you and then to Lavanya. i wanted you to have no one, except me and our child. i...i.." She stopped gulping the lump formed in her throat.
"I wanted you to fall for me badly so that i can ditch you later just like you did. For doing this, i know i had to get married to you. I didn't have any other option except to use our child and shamelessly i did it. I used my unborn child to take revenge on you." Kushi clutched her belly as tears flowed out of her eyes.
"I won, you married me. I started to act nicely to you. Everything was going accordingly until i realised that i couldn't do it anymore. I realised i still love you and couldn't hurt you." He nodded silently as she looked at him expectantly to utter something which he didnt. She added "another reason for marrying you is..."
He interrupted her waving the file in front of her. "This. You wanted to throw me out of AR after ditching me. You brought forty percent shares of AR. But you couldn't touch remaining shares as they were equally divided in name of all raizada's." He said in causal tone shocking her. "You knew it?"
"Apparently, i knew most of what you have confessed. Only thing that was news for me is that you wanted me to fall for you." He accepted surprising her more because none of the shares were on her or her employee's name. She didn't buy the share but instead bought the people who were his share holders. "When did you find it out?" she enquired him.
"The day before we got married." He said in causal tone shocking her more. "After knowing that why did you marry me?" she questioned him fearing that there might be some other reason for their marriage. "kushi, money has never been my priority and it will never be. I married you because i wanted to. Because i felt it was the right thing to do for me; for you; for our child."
"There is nothing you did for which you should feel guilty or bad. Forget it." Kushi gulped sensing that he was not angry or upset with her. "But i tried to destroy your family." She said guiltily as he got up to which he replied "You just tired. But i destroyed your's"
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"You are bas****, Arnav!" Arnav looked up from laptop screen and glanced at his fuming wife. "Excuse me! Did you just call me with that name?" He asked little surprised and little angry. "Yes I did. And you are really a bas****." She said crossing her arms against her chest. Arnav looked at her confusingly. She had been acting strangely, like talking to herself, for last two hours after their confrontation.
"What happened?" he asked placing his laptop aside. "It was you, who used me to take revenge on my dad. It was you who betrayed me after bluffing me. It was you who did all mistake. But now you are acting like nice person and forgiving me for the mistake which i never committed. What will everyone think? That you are a nice person and i am a bi*** for hiding truth.."
She said in one breath making Arnav to look at her in awe. "Forget about everyone, i myself feel that you are a mahan and i am a bi***, which i am not." She confessed angrily making him to laugh. "Don't laugh, Arnav. At least you could have acted like you were angry on me and scolded me. From morning i was practising to say sorry. I expected big fight like grabbing my arm and holding it tightly or asking me 'how can you do this to me' with tears. then fight...then i will ask sorry..then you accept it... followed by romance." She said disappointedly sitting next to him.
"kushi...you should really stop watching those soaps." He said in between his giggles making her to fume more. He pulled into his arms. Resting her back on his chest, she pouted "seriously Arnav, how can you be like this?"
He rested his chin on her shoulders. "Guess who taught me to be like this?!?" he kissed her cheeks making her to smile. But she pulled away from his embrace and faced him with worried look. "But i seriously don't like this Arnav. I liked Arnav who yelled at me for no reasons; who always looked angry; who never talks to anyone."
"and i like this Kushi very much. Kushi who talks all non-sense; who fights with me for every single thing; who never gets upset; who i lost five months before." he said looking at her. She smiled slightly thinking something and then her smile grew more.
She said "when i lost mom, i thought i will never be able to be happy again or enjoy life. But you proved me wrong. Mom was right. You are perfect for me."
"i am not that perfect, kushi." he admitted honestly. She agreed and said "and that's why you are perfect for me. Because i am also imperfect."
i know it's not good...but still u can press like button and write comments...i promise that i will mae next update better...so sorryðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜...do read the note below
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