Chapter 9

Chapter 9

his old love story

Khushi is disappointed...

All what he said about love is related to the movie...and he's talking in general...

He doesn't love her like a husband should love his wife and he will never...

Love can't come like this...months ago he was telling her that she will be only the bahu of the family and nothing else...it's true and it will be always true...

Even if he had held her like that...it means nothing...

Khushi sipped in her hot coffee mug looking at the pool before her...

She's sad...

Mira leaving in the morning made her sadder...

She couldn't go to the university...

She's sad...so sad...not only because of yesterday night but she was worry for her future...she doesn't know what to do?...

if she should love him and waits for his love for all her life or just close her heart to him and wait for their seperation...

She took her laptop and typed...

Why you didn't kiss me Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada?

I was waiting...

How stupid I'm to think that there is a change in your behavior...

You don't love me...you will never love me...

I should leave...

I knew it from the start that my place isn't next to you...

You consider me only as a friend but I want so much more from you...

I want you to tell me "stay" when I talk about seperation...to shout at me that you love me and that I should love you in return...

I want you to be angry because you can't be with me all the day...to call me every minute, every second because you're missing my voice!

I want you to regret the fact that you get away from me, every morning, to leave to your office...I want you to come here in your lunch pause, just because you want to see me...

I want more...I want what every wife has already without even demanding...small things! details!

I want you as husband...my husband!

How stupid she delete it all...this is so stupid...all this for a kiss but she has closed her eyes, she was waiting...he could see that she wanted him to act...that she was ready to attend another level...they are spending months together, in same room, same bed...and till now not even a hug...not even a soft touch...

that means...there is no difference for him!!!

-are you deciding to spend the day here?...chote called he said that he tried to call you in your mobile but it was switched off!

Anjeli said smiling to her...khushi could see that her belly is getting bigger...

She smiled and wiped a tear escaping her eye...

-oh...I will call him back!

She said...

-are you alright?

Anjeli asked sitting next to her in the poolside...

-yes!

-sure?

-Anjeli...

-yes...tell me!

-me and Arnavji...we can't be together!

-what?...but I thought you're alright together...I mean you're appreciating each other

-we are friends!

-that's so cool!

-yes...so cool...but only cool...I mean...

-khushi...I know what do you mean...I know you're needing more feelings, more care...you're waiting for another kind of relation with your husband...but...I think that little by little, you could build that with chote!

-I won't force him to love me!...I'm taking my distance...whenever I think he cares...I'm disappointed!

-I think he cares and more...I think he wants to give you more but he's stopping himself...he has been hurt in love before, so, he's careful this time!

Hearing that...khushi's heart stopped beating...

-he's been in love before?

She asked, don't showing her emotions...he's in love with another woman...

-hmm...but it was in the past...this story ended way before your marriage!

Anjeli added...

How she was the one he loved?

How he behaved with her?

He gave her his heart...his soul...

She remembered his words: "I refuse to let go of the ones I love!"

Then...she's the one leaving him?

questions filling khushi's mind...she wants to know everything about her husband's love story...

-hey?...khushi? where are you?

Khushi faked a smile...

-I can't imagine Arnavji in love!

she said looking at Anjeli...

-what?

Anjeli giggled...

-it's a story from the past!...don't think about that...come, let's eat...I'm so hungry...I think the baby is hungry too!

********************

She doesn't know why she's crying now...

He was in love...and then what?

It was an old love story...it's old...that's give it more mystery...

He kept maybe her photos here...her letters here...

they may spend all the day holding hands, talking, kissing...

OMG!

She should stop thinking like an adolescent!

Wasn't it enough to spend all the day in the bed, just thinking about him...and crying just by imaging that he had kissed another woman, loved another woman, getting hurt by another woman

She closed her eyes and tried to sleep...she falls asleep with difficulty...

***

She opens her eyes feeling a touch on her forehead...

She saw Arnav's worried expression...

-khushi? are you alright?

She tried to stand up but he stopped her

-shhh...just rest!...you have fever...

-fever?...no! I'm alright!

-just relax!...Di told me that you're sick...you didn't go to the uni...I knew it something is wrong...

-what?...I just didn't go because I wanted to stay here today but I'm not...

-shhh...please, less talk!...rest, I'm here!

Anjeli enters...

-chote...here the tissues and cold water!

-I'm not sick!

-yes you are, I come to check you...you're burning!...and the doctor was here!

Anjeli confirmed...

-I'm sure...I'm not sick...

It's maybe because she cried lots...

-it's not fever...it's just because I cried a lot!

She regretted...Arnav looked at her with the same worried expression and this time with questioning eyes...

-you cried a lot?...why?

He asked...

-because Mira left

khushi answered after a while...

Anjeli chooses to leave the room

-then...I'm out...but khushi, please eat something!

She said...closing the door behind...

-you cried all the day?

Arnav asked with a concerned look...he caressed her hair gently...

-almost...

She said honestly...

-but why?...you know very well that any time you want, you can visit her at Lucknow!

-I know...maybe I should come back to Lucknow!

He looked at her eyes suddenly...he doesn't want to understand what she just said...

-it's maybe the right time to talk to my parents!

-talk to them about what, khushi?

he asked frustrated

-about...our seperation

-why you're again talking about this??...we had the same conversation few days back and I told you, khushi, what I think: I want to give this marriage a second chance!

- I will just go!

she said randomly, like she doesn't listen to him at all

-alright!

-tomorrow!

-you have your university!

-no problem, could miss some curses!

-but why?...you can go in the weekend!

she closes her eyes...

-please...let me go...

-fine then...I will come along with you!

she opens her eyes...

-no!...you can't ...you're busy...

he smirked looking at her

-khushi...this will be your first time visiting your family after our marriage, don't you think that I should accompagny you?

-it's not a must...

-shhh...

he said touching her forehead again

-don't argue!...for now, you have a fever, you should eat and rest only!..tomorrow trip to Lucknow will depends on how you will get well...otherwise, you won't leave this bed!

he said firmly like he was scolding a little child...

****************

Arnav couldn't believe that he made her eat her soup, after trying so hard to convince her to eat...to accept him feeding her...

and then she slept like an angel...but he could feel that there is something wrong...

when he gets down to have his dinner...

Anjeli and Shyam come and join him for dinner and start asking about khushi...

-she's fine, Di, she slept

-she ate her soup?

-yeah but I don't know...there is something bothering her

Arnav said thinking hard what had he did wrong that hurts khushi...he saw a pain and a blaming look in her eyes that he saw before...in their first days of marriage...

-chote?

-hmm

-I think I did something wrong!

Arnav looked at her with questioning eyes...

-now when I thought about it...I shouldn't have told khushi about your first love!

-excuse me! ...I mean why to tell her?

-we were just talking and...

-Di!!!...how could you?!...I mean this is my private life!...

-sorry chote but I said it randomly...I never meant to create any problem...I think it's for that that khushi is upset?

-of course damn it!...now, she will think that I'm hiding many things from her and...

-any woman hates to hear that!

Shyam confirmed

-I'm very sorry!

Arnav stands up...

-chote!

Anjeli looked at him with guilty eyes...

she doesn't think so much when she's talking with khushi...she just opened up...

-no Di! it's ok...khushi would know about it now or later!...even if it's an old story...she should know about it

Shyam smiled to him...

-of course ...but what she should know the most is how much her husband is in love with her...

Shyam seems to understand the situation very well and he gave Arnav those words which he knows they are going to guide him somehow...