Chapter 10

Chapter 8
Part A

Khushi looked at her watch for the fifth time since she had gotten to the cricket grounds that evening, looking up again to scan the sparsely populated ground once again trying to catch a glimpse of Varun.

Varun, her boyfriend.

She stood waiting under the shade of a Neem tree, a raised hand shielding her eyes from the harsh sun and her heels digging into the soft ground as she contemplated on how Varun and she had come to sharing that relationship.

He had proposed to her the night of the party to no one's surprise, certainly not to hers, while on their way back to her house when he had offered to drop her. It had been a cute proposal and Khushi knew she would have appreciated it more had she been less hurt and angry with Arnav and sometimes she still questioned whether those emotions were the only reason she said Yes' to Varun...feeling like a heel each time knowing that if not fully, that had at least partially been the reason for her easy acceptance.

But she also knew that Varun was a likeable fellow and felt that if she gave him time, she would certainly end up falling for him - she achingly hoped she would in any case because that night had not seen the birth of just one couple. Arnav and Lavanya had emerged as strong contenders to the title of the Newest Sweethearts' of school and Khushi knew that a lot of people had been surprised by the development as it had taken place.

It was only when the news of both her and Arnav finding themselves in a relationship not with each other had broken out, had she come to know how much even other people, including people who knew them well as well as who did not know them at all and a few teachers as well, had thought that things would work differently for the two. In other words, that whenever one of them found love, it would be with the other.

Khushi felt bile rise up to her throat as she sarcastically scoffed at the notions people had, cursing herself yet again for falling into the same line of thought herself...where had it gotten her?! No where except a place in life where she couldn't even sit down for two minutes with a guy who till recently had been her bestest friend in the whole wide world! Each time she looked at Arnav, it was as if she was looking at him for the very first time and yet...something was missing and Khushi realized soon enough that it was her own self standing and smiling next to him, with him that was missing from the scene. She was now seeing Arnav from a vantage point which did not include her in his life and even more sadly him in her.

It had not escaped her notice that Arnav seemed to have forgotten her existence ever since he had gotten together with Lavanya and no it didn't matter that she had been ignoring him herself, Khushi thought to herself fiercely forcefully flicking away a strand of her hair blowing in her face, it didn't matter at all! They had gotten into tiffs before, she had ignored him before but Arnav had never, till now that is, given a blind eye to it! He had always come back to check on her, even if just to insinuate that her reaction was the result of her hormones going out of balance...she used to slap him around the head then but now even his naughty jokes had become a thing of the past.

And Khushi realized that it wasn't just someone she knew she could love she had lost but also her best friend - one with whom there had never been any secrets but now there was no time to share them.

She had still been lost in her thoughts when she felt a hand snake around her waist and herself being pulled into a warm embrace, held against a firm strong chest for a second before being released and being greeted by the smiling face of her boyfriend.

And standing just beside him the contenders to their title of the Newest Sweethearts' and only Khushi knew how she stopped herself from screaming out in pure frustration and annoyance at the sight.

"Hey! I am sorry I was late...got held back by who else but your Arnav!" and then turning towards Arnav, an arm wrapped around her shoulders, "Dude! We are done with all tournaments yet you have questions for your poor captain?! These are just like those bonus sessions you know? Ab toh chill maar!"

Khushi felt the acute need to correct Varun and tell him that Arnav was no longer hers'. Instead he should use these superlatives for the woman whose hand it seemed was permanently glued in his - ALL THE f**kING TIME THEY WERE f**kING HOLDING HANDS! WHAT THE f**k?! IT WAS LIKE THEY HAD A f**kING DOCTOR'S f**kING PRESCRIPTION SAYING THAT IF THEY DIDN'T HOLD f**kING HANDS, THE WORLD WOULD COME TO A f**kING END! BLOODY f**kING-

"Geez captain just cos you have a girlfriend, you will neglect the game! Khu, you aint good for the health of our team, man! Thank God Varun proposed to you after the tournament nahin toh you would have definitely cost us the cup!"

"Yeah? Glad that he didn't then otherwise the f**king precious cup wouldn't have been there to increase your already massively f**ked up ego. Varun, I will see you later. I am getting late now. Bye."

The words were out of her mouth like the canon burst out of a tank even before she could herself reflect over it and quickly turning on her heels, Khushi stalked off, partially too much in rage to stop back and listen and partially too embarrassed to stand there and witness the hurt she knew would cross Arnav's face at her outburst.

*****

That had only been the beginning of encounters gradually but steadily spiraling down on Khushi's tolerance meter' as any small jibe by Arnav would end up with catastrophic results as Khushi would knowingly but without being able to help herself react in a manner not suited to the level of the jibe - her anger and hurt making her more and more icy in her behaviour towards Arnav and Lavanya which would in itself result in Arnav sometimes losing it and stalking off (with Lavanya's hand in his of course) or worse arguing it out with her which would end only with Varun and Lavanya dragging off their respective partners away from the other.

Khushi knew that what she was doing was hampering her friendship with Arnav and if she continued in her ways, the said friendship may very well become a thing of the past yet there was nothing that she could tell herself that would help her not react in such unfair ways. It was as if every time she saw Arnav and Lavanya together, a switch would go off in her brain and make her the evil-er sister of Godzilla.

A few times she had managed to reign in her anger and hurt had been when Arnav and she had been alone, going on about like how it was before and Khushi felt disgust at herself and her level of desperation to be with Arnav at how happy she felt in such occasions and hence such evening often ended with an even more depressed Khushi dragging her feet around, ignoring all questions and queries of her parents and feeling even worse that none of these questions came from Arnav.

Was he really that thick to not have noticed her pendulum like behaviour?! To not have figured out when exactly the pendulum swung in the two extremes?! Was he really that dumb to not have realized that something (READ HIM!) was wrong with his supposed best friend?!

The only answer Khushi could find to these questions was that Arnav was no longer attuned to her.

And that she was no longer his best friend. Even that spot had been filled in by the enigmatic Lavanya Kashyap.

And Khushi truly truly wanted to hate her for that. For that and for taking Arnav away from her before she could give him an option to choose from.

But she couldn't.

All she could manage was to hate herself even more at how petty she had become, at how clingy she felt around Arnav and how much she lied around Varun.

She had become a person she would have hated. And she did.

*****

Varun Jaiswal didn't hate Khushi Gupta.

He couldn't.

Not when he had liked her since two long years and had literally made moon eyes at her when she wasn't looking which had been at all times because Khushi Gupta never looked at him, she never truly looked at him...until that night when he had finally taken a concrete step towards him and lo and behold he found Khushi Gupta not only looking at him, truly looking at him, but actually in his arms dancing the night away.

Or so it had seemed.

And Varun could almost laugh at himself at how naive he had been to actually believe what all he had believed just because he had wished for it to happen for so long that when it did, he took it at face value never bothering to check the facts.

Not until they hit him straight across the face at least.

And even then not until they knocked the wind out of him and not just lightly tapped him as they had been since that very first night when Khushi had found comfort in his arms after Arnav had teased her.

He had thought then that it was just a girl thing to do - feel upset when your best friend didn't acknowledge the effort you made to dress up and feeling cornered when he engaged in some teasing (which he thought was a boy thing to do) and he had steered her away from Arnav, not wanting to have her even more upset on the night he planned to come clean about his feelings to her.

Never had he thought back then that it wasn't just a girl feeling upset that her best friend didn't acknowledge her efforts to dress up but rather a young woman experiencing her first heart break when the man she wished would have his arms around her held someone's else's hand while he teased her.

He had lapped up all the attention Khushi had showered over him or rather all the attention he had thought Khushi was showering over him when all she was doing was turning towards someone else when she turned away from Arnav and his girlfriend.

One may ask when exactly did all these truths make themselves clear to Varun Jaiswal and he would answer in all honesty that they had always been clear, he just hadn't wanted to take off his rose tinted glasses and peer at them face on.

But then he had kissed Khushi that first time and instead of blushing in his arms like he had heard most girls do after a first kiss, she had cried and although even then, much to his own chagrin, he had tried to accept her offhand excuse of getting something in her eyes he had not been able to convince himself of the scientific impossibility of Khushi catching dirt in her eyes when they were closed and the bubble had burst.

Khushi Gupta had no feelings for him.

At least not in the way he had for her.

The fact that she liked Arnav had been the second Gospel truth that had made itself clear to him almost the same instant as when he had finally accepted the above to himself. There really had been no contention to the issue and now it was as plainly clear to him as the sky was blue.

But the sky hadn't yet turned blue for Arnav and Varun Jaiswal squared his shoulders as he spied his favourite junior, one who many accused him of favouring, his shagird enter the club with Lavanya on his arms, his eyes flicking over to the spot at an angle behind the couple where Khushi stood, her feelings for Arnav visible to all in her eyes to read in that weak moment and the decision Varun Jaiswal had taken already drew strength from that broken look.

Varun Jaiswal didn't hate Khushi Gupta for all the heartache she had put him through, for making out of him a love sick puppy happy with the few crumbs she unwittingly threw his way, for making him the arms she would find solace, solace she needed because her heart beat for someone else.

No.

In fact he liked her enough to talk to Arnav about them - him and Khushi.

Arnav and Khushi.

Next chapter - Page 53

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*Not proof read.

Dictionary
Shagird - Student/Pupil

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