Chapter 4
The next couple of days were pretty much the same, He met her parents couple of times. The days were quite busy due to the never lasting shopping trips, accompanied by lots of kisses and lovable stares. He was trying to make her as happy as possible, he did everything, bought roses, gifted her teddy bears, spent all the possible time with her, yet time to time he would catch her depressed and he never knew why.
And then she would flash that smile.
She had always done this, no matter whatever had been going on. She would always smle and pretend that everything was as beautiful as it could ever be, and that was something he had always loved this about her. Right from the school days.
She glanced at the twinkling stars, they seem to look at her. The moon was curved and it was bright. The moonlight reflected everything in a different manner, it seemed to be that every night, the moon would try to light the world as much as it could-and she loved it. As a kid, she had spent endless nights looking at the moon and the people who passed by.
She absolutely loved the night. Everything about it was beautiful. The beautiful stars and the only moon, plus there was always eerie silence. She would sit at her window with only her lamp on and listen to the crickets. How much disturbing they were yet they were so silent.
It seemed as though they were trying to make her feel their presence just by croacking-okay, not exactly croaking. But she could never figure out the word used for that particular voice.
Today, eighteen years later, she was on the Yacht, gazing at the water, which suddenly seemed so cool and affectionate to her. the yacht moved very slowly, yet she could feel the little movement of water as they moved.
The sky was dark and so was her mood. Her parents were sleeping conveniently on some hotel he had booked for them, why was he doing all this for her? she did not know.
"What are you doing here?" he asked.
"I just needed some air" she said with a silent sigh.
The next moment she felt his touch on her shoulder, he had rested his arm there and pulled her closer.
"What's wrong?" he asked.
"Its just that, tomorrow i won't be the girl i used to, i won't be daring, stupid, fun, alive anymore. I would just be married" she said
"You're just nervous" he said and his tone seemed stupid.
"And i should be, i mean, marriage is such a bliss! I enjoy each moment i send with you but there's this something which pricks me" she said.
He made her look at him "What's bothering you? Come on, speak it out" he said.
"It's just that, after taking this huge step, you will start noticing my imperfections and flaws, and you may not feel the same about me" she said.
"Everyone have their own imperfections, we're all whacky in our own ways" his hand curled up her cheek to hold her face slightly. "And its never going to affect my feelings for you"
"You-You're not whacky, you're so-so amazing" she said with her eyes twinkling in the moonlight.
Her features displayed a warmth, her eyes were a mix of feelings-homesickness and love. He did not know what he could say or do at the moment, He just wanted to hold her close and tell her that she could always be the same daring, stupid and what did she say? Alive again, yet he didn't want to utter a word. Gathering all his courage he planned to ask the question which was capable of dissolving all the dreams he had for the two of them, yet, he knew he had to ask.
"But, the question is, do you really want this to happen?" he looked away, he did not want to face her, in anyway.
And at that moment, she wanted to run away, she wanted to push him away and get as away from him as possible. Her eyes turned teary and she could not help but admire the way he was trying to end this conversation as though it had been some bad dream. His eyes had affection, care, and honour. She had never in her life met anyone who would honour her, let alone a man.
She wanted to make him look at her, but couldn't. She wanted to stay right where they were; it generated a feeling that was just so hard to fight. She could feel warmth coming from his body, his muscular chest was tight against her chest and she felt a necessity to spin her arms around and just hold him enormously. But couldn't.
"Yes. I do want to marry you. Heck, I want to marry you so much! I want to attach your name to mine, I want to hold you when you come back from office, I want to scold you for speaking to other chicks, but most of all" she looked up at him "I want to be called yours. And I want to stay yours forever"
He could just look at her, he wanted to kiss her, hold the small of her back and kiss her but he was afraid that she'd get scared. She already looked so teary eyed. He was afraid, that she might run away from him, he felt so strange when around her, she was so beautiful, and yet so insecure about herself. So breakable, yet so strong in her own ways.
There was a pause.
He kissed her forehead and she could feel his hot breath over her skin. "I think you need some sleep"
"But i don't" she hushed. Even in dim lights he could notice her blushing.
"You don't want dark circles down your eyes, do you?" he said.
"I won't mind" she grinned.
He chuckled. "But I do, i don't want my bride yawning at her own wedding"
She nodded in agreement "I'm nodding in agreement"
"Come on now, Sleep Kitten!" he grinned and she could just smile at the adoring look he was slanting towards her.
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She walked down the aisle with her father by the side. No, she was not nervous. Nervous was a minor understatement of the year. Her palms were dripping with sweat and her face was all read due to the sudden heat which was rising inside her. and the sudden fastening of her heart beat. She was smiling and the way he was looking at her, she knew he couldn't resist it.
"You look so beautiful, so white, so pure, just like a" there was a pause "kitten"
And the way he'd said that plus the way he was looking at her, she could not help but blush and just mutter a thank you, she knew she looked dangerously apealing to him, she could see it in his eyes. He seemed so lost. That intense gaze that covered his dark eye balls could just convey what he was feeling. And yet be so quiet.
She did not even look up once when the priest asked her if she would expect him as her man, she was so delighted to hear that already. Her cheeks were growing hotter when she muttered "I do" and then he pulled her slightly and kissed on her lips, not that the kiss was harsh or soft, it was just a pure bliss, and staying so close to him in his arms, she could feel the warmth that his body radiated.
There was still a photosession, reception and dinner to go before they could be alone as a man and wife, thinking of this he made a face. He had waited too long for this to want to do anything but to savour her.
He was holding her arm tightly. Occasionaly, pulling her closer and making her cling on himself, he liked this feeling, having her to claim as his. Having her to be with him and smile at the conversations-even if she didn't want to. He knew that she was giving it er best shot, she was doing everything she could to enjoy this party and yet he knew that she wasn't enjoying.
Her face ached from all the photo-taking, she'd shaken a million hands during the line up and she'd barely managed to get close to food, let alone eat any of it. She tried not to be overwhelmed by the vast amount of Reyaansh's friends, compared to the small clutch of people she'd flown out of. And she tried not to feel insecure of all the beautiful women who chattered so vivaciously, expressiely swriling their hands around as they spoke.
"Can I remove my heels?" she hushed and he made a face, it was fifteenth time she was asking this.
"That's the fifteenth time you're asking me that" he said, encircling his arm around her waist and pulling him against her.
She pouted and he tried to keep a straight face, tried to avoid the fact that she looked so cute while doing that, "Because, these heels hurt my legs" she said "ad if you want me to continue wearing these, it will be nothing but a pure torture"
He supressed a laugh "Wearing heels is a torture? Thats the craziest thing i could hear from a girl"
"I don't talk femaleville" she said. "And since you make walk around this place and meet all the existing people, these heels do no good to my legs"
"You're still wearing them" he nodded.
"I will not" she crossed her arms across her chest.
"You're wearing them" he said "Ever seen a bride moving around without her shoes?"
"I don't care and that won't change my mind" she retorted.
"You're wearing them, and that's the end of this conversation" he sighed deeply.
She bit her lip and looked somewhere else. A smile crossed her lips as she said "okay, but I will wear them only if you won't make me roam"
"So maybe, it's the time when i finally take you to my bed?" he said as she leaned her head over his shoulder "How does that sound to you Mrs Reyaansh Singhania?"
She felt thrilled by the way he mentioned that she was his wife, she felt as though there was finally someone out there watching out for her, someone who could love her and support her. "Oh yes please" was all she said.
"Then lets, you know, move out silently" he said and she could just smile.
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The fact she could never deny was how irresistable he was, they entered the suit kissing each other, his hand moved down her spine as hers ran into his hair, grabbing a fistful of hair and pulling them, he licked her lower lip as if coaxing her to open her mouth, and when she did. His tongue travelled madly in, studying every inch of her mouth precisely, and asking her to never breakaway from him. She had this feeling, as if he was inside her, feeling her and loving her at the same moment, and she totally loved it. He could convey it easily through the kiss how much he wanted her, and how could he not? She felt so amazing, so mesmerizing and so welcoming.
He broke away and found her panting, sucking in breath, but she wasn't satisfied. She had a look in her eyes which could tell him that, easily.
He softly pushed her on the bed and she more than welcomed him, and before she could even realize he was on top of her, and she suddenly she could feel it again, the sparks whithin her, as though he was generating a mild light which could soothe her, as though thousand of shades were bursting inside her head. And she liked it.
"I want to see you" he hushed.
She could just blush. "why will i object?"
She could see the stretching smirk on his lips, and a look of wild hunger in his eyes. It felt as though he had been waiting for this time since a decade, or even more than that. She felt so good against his skin that he could not resist hs desires. When with her, he had this desire. It seemed to be more about her than him, he wanted to pleasure her, to make her feel alive. He didn't want her to miss anything. May it be anything.
He saw her close her eyes gently, with a smile that could tell her how much she loved him, how much she wanted more and more of him.
He unzipped her dress slightly, and pushed it away from her, and he could just admire her beauty, her petite body which seemed so breakable, so beautiful, her sun kissed tone which perfectly suited her skin and the slight rise and fall of her chest.
"Can i touch you Kriya?" he hushed.
"Yes" it was a whisper, hardly audible to her own self.
He dug her face in the crook of her neck, leaving her only in her essentials, his hands were touching her all around. She clutched the bedsheet but he traced her hands there and joined it with his own. He moved slightly down her body, placing a hickey or two. He sucked in her honey-dipped skin, and before she could realize, a moan left her lips "Reyaansh" she moaned out heavily. Each of her breath were ragged.
There was need in her voice, a desire and a wanting, as if she'd die at the moment, his hands moved down her theighs, touching her exposed legs all around. He came to a point where he could just wonder whether she was liking it or not, but then she asked him not to stop, which only determined him to study her furthermore.
And just then he unclipped her essential, moving down her body, she dug her nails in his back, leaving hard scratches there as she felt a sense of deep pleasure. Her reactions were abrupt but he was enjoying every inch of this.
He got rid of his clothes soon, throwing them away somewhere, and Kriya was left wide eyed looking at his musceled torso and tight abs.
The way she reacted to his touch, he couldn't help but adore that, the way she moved beneath his skin, he could feel saisfaction there. and especially the way her body was responding to each of his quick sensual movements.
He sucked in her skin sexually and she dug her nails even further in his skin.
When he touched her, she could feel nothing but pleasure, she could say nothing but his name. She was furious to feel him against her, and so was he. It was that movement when the realization about what they were about to do hit him with a start. But then, this was the thing about marriage, she was his bride, even if she got pregnant, so what?
He entered her slowly, feeling a rush of emotions- all at once,there was anxiety, there was care and protection towards her, and he still felt so weak and vulnerable.
She moaned out and wrapped her legs around his waist and torn away her lips from him to let out a cry-or moan he would say, she ushed her head back and he could just look at her in anguish. He let her go and silently lied back, wondering whether he was so silken deep in pleasure that he might have slept and imagined those things? Was she really wriggling her toes up and down? He didn't know. He sighed and looked at her so that their eyes were in collision, and he was careful not to accuse. There was a possibility of him being mistaken, please god, he wished, may he be mistaken.
"You liked that?" he asked silently.
"I loved it" she could just hush.
But then before she could even realize what was happening he got up from the bed and grabbing his pants he moved out in the terrace, she wanted to follow him, to ask what was wrong. But he just moved out and closed the door with a thud. She felt a clinch of her heart. As though she'd been played. But she there was nothing she could do about it. She decided to walk up to him, and ask what was wrong with him. But what could she possibly say?
She found a bathrobe in his bathroom and wearing it she walked out to check what was up with him, why was he acting so indifferently suddenly? She didn't know, but some things were there to find out.
He was leaning on the railings, The night was dark and deep, The stars shone in the sky and cool mild winds were blowing, it was October and early winters were already approaching.
She kept a hand on his shoulder, and she could feel his muscles tense. She could feel the warmth of his skin and could definitely see the frown that was visible on his face.
"Is something wrong?" she asked hesitatingly.
"Nothing" he shook his head.
"Is it something to do with.." she was interrupted.
"No, Nothing really" he retorted.
"Reyaansh, you can tell me if there is a problem" she said.
"I said its nothing" he said a flat tone "Perhaps, I think you should probably sleep now, it's late"
He made everything sound very casual, but Kriya wasn't a fool. She could sense the under pinned bitterness in his voice and the sudden hardening of his eyes.
"I won't until you come with me" she said.
He nodded. He could feel her hand on him and he wanted to push it away, he wanted to push her away even. But he didn't want to accuse, he didn't want to hurt her, he wanted this to be special for her and he had tried to do his best. And it was the sudden realization which had caused his feelings to drift away from her so drastically.
"Reyaansh, Are you fine?" she said "Was I not good enough?"
"No" he retorted "Its just some old issues"
She nodded, she knew there was something there in the way he was speaking to her, there was this drastic change in his behaviour and she did not know what she should do. Or say.
"You should sleep maybe" she dimmed the lamps. "Good Night, love"
She kissed his cheek and could get absolutely nothing in return, his muscles strained, and she saw a forced little smile on his lips-as if he were trying not to disappoint her.
"Good Night" he spoke.
She threw her hands across his chest and rested her head slightly on his shoulder lovingly, but he just shifted away to other side, ignoring all her attempts, he pushed her hand away from him and turned to the other side.
She felt weak, pale and suddenly she wanted to weep.
He kept tossing and turning that night, there was no sleep for him. He kept questioning himself, why did he expect her to be different from all the others? Why did he see her in a way he hadn't ever seen a woman?
He remembered the shameless fortune-hunters who asked him to bed them just in search of money. He remembered his own mother, too caught up in her desires to find time for her little boy. He remembered lying awake in his cold deep house wondering if his mother would come back alone or not.
And then he could just look at her remember how her innocent charms seemed to have captured him. But it was then when he realized that the skin which looked so creamy and delicious covered in retro clothes was nothing but a sham. The innocence and insecurities which seemed to pound over his heart was nothing but a sham.
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