Chapter 3

October 11- a day which held the utmost importance in my life. I had been waiting for it since what seemed like forever and had done all the preparations for it. After all, it was Taani's B'day. As I was 2 months younger to her in age, she used to tease me a lot about it.

You are younger, follow my orders", she'd say.

3 days prior to her B'day, I got thinking about what gift to buy for her. I searched a lot, and finally got a Teddy bear for 700 Rs from an Archies Gallery. I even made her a handmade greeting card which said

Forgive me for all things I did

I'm sorry for all the pain I caused you

No sooner than you went away,

I realized your importance in my life.

Please give me my life back.

I need it. I miss it. And I miss you

*~*~*

I woke up early in the morning. In anticipation of her B'day, I was unable to catch much sleep. I was anxious, afraid, excited, happy, and nervous- all at the same time.

I plugged my cell phone earphones in my ears and drove my bike to Navi Mumbai where her house was located. I was continuously listening to our favorite song...

Tujhe dekh dekh sona,

Tujhe dekh kar hi jagna,

Main ye zindagani sang tere bitaani,

Tujhme basi hai meri jaan...

Then I looked at my watch. It was 2:30 pm. nervously smoking a cigarette, I dismounted from my bike and came and stood right in front in front of her apartment.

A cigarette later, I saw the time again. It was 2:40 pm

Two cold drinks and 20 cigarettes later, 4:40pm.

I thought of giving up. Swayam, who had been waiting with me for over 2 hours, motivated me to continue.

She will come dude. Just have patience.'

Why is it always me? Why can't I get to talk my love on her B'day?'

But I knew it was my mistake. It was all because I had taken the worst decision of my life. I was one who had left her all alone. Why should I blame anyone else?

By the time it was 4. 50 PM, I TOOK MY MOBILE AND DIALED HER NUMBER.

Is it ringing?'

Swayam asked

Not yet'

Is it now?'

Swayam whispered after a few seconds

Ssshhh...wait, its ringing.'

I could hear her hello tune

Jab rulaana hi tha tujhe, to phir hasaaya kyun, saath rehkar bhi juda, to paas aaya kyun...

My heartbeat increased, I heard a sound at other end

Hello?'

I said in anticipation, but all I got was an automated response saying,

The number you have dialed is currently busy'

What the F**k!! I will throw my cell away. Why me, Why always me?'

Rey, shes here!! Run'

Shouted Swayam when he saw her coming out from her apartment.

Yes, She was there. Dressed in a white top, low waist jeans, black bag, wearing black eyeliner, and her hair left loose. She was looking hot enough to drive me crazy. I was confused about how I should react. So I just ran away from there. It was a straight road with a curve at the end that led towards other apartments.

We stopped near the curve and watched her come towards us. My heartbeats increased & ran like manic. She came closer to me and I felt like I missed 2-3 beats and would die there.

I was paralyzed. I didn't know what to do. She was getting into an auto rickshaw.

Damn all in vain. I thought.

I gathred courage and ran in her direction with a box of chocolates in one hand and a wrapped gift in the other.

Taani. Please wait.'

I shouted after her

Bhayia, HDFC bank chaloge?'

She said to the driver.

Please wait. Just give 2 minutes. Please.'

I cried.

I am late, Reyaansh. Please, I can't do this now'

I just want 2 minutes of your time. I promise.'

Okay fine. Get into rickshaw. You can come with me till HDFC.'

I got in. The bank was hardly 1 km away. But it was still better than not getting a chance to speak to her at all.

How are you?'

I inquired

Enjoying my Life. Do you have any problem with that?'

I knew what it meant. She just wanted to show that she did not care for me anymore. She just wanted me to stop bothering her.

OH!! Really? So what's the plan for today?'

I asked her, wanting to hear her say,

Nothing, spending the day with my friends. You're free to join us.'

But she responded with

I don't want to tell you. So don't bother asking.'

This was the worst answer anyone could expect. Seriously. However, I was helpless. If I would have overreacted at that time, she would have thrown me out. I had waited for this moment for a long time and I knew better than to ruin it. Therefore, I chose to remain mum. But the heart is fool.

I shouted. Why are you so rude?'

Reyaansh, it's my B'day and I am going out with my friends. So please don't spoil my day.'

Was I spoiling her day? I thought I would make her day special by giving her surprise. But you can never really understand girls, can you? They are divine creations of God- mysterious and incomprehensible.

Happy B'day!!!'

I wished her.

Thanx. Now get down. We've reached HDFC.'

She told driver to wait and went to the ATM. I was still waiting for her by the auto. When she came out, I could tell that she was bit annoyed watching me still waiting there.

You haven't left? Just leave. Don't make me angrier than I already am.'

These are for you I said handling her gifts I had brought for her.'

Thanx, but I can't take them.'

I knew she would say that but I kept on insisting,

Please take them, please.'

No I can't Reyaansh'

Taani, Baccha I bought these especially for you'

So what? Throw it away. I don't care!'

My heart cried in pain. I WAS HELPLESS. I needed her. I needed her even more badly than before. My heart needed her the most.

She went away. I kept thinking if I should be happy that I saw her or sad that it turned out to be a bad surprise for her. Or should I think of all the money I wasted in buying her those gifts that she didn't even bother taking? I could have made good use of the money and purchased four bottles of beer instead.

I will drink till I'm dead, I thought.'

But was it really the end of life?'

Nothing is permanent. Maybe my love story will take a new turn and I will have a happy ending after all. Or will it be vice versa? I was really trapped. My life had come to a standstill.

How should I get Taani back into my life? I thought about it a bit more.

But why did I let her go?'

I always dreamt of falling in love and when I WAS IN LOVE, everything felt like a dream. It was a dream world with no limits. I got a girl who deserved a better person than me. She chose to be with me. I was her life. What happened then? Why did I do this to her? The dream ended in a way I NEVER wanted it to. Nevertheless. The dream hurt for it was not real. So does falling in love hurt? After all, it is a fall. I now realized why people call it "falling in love". I got my answers when I was left hurt & cursed from the inside, bleeding alone...