Chapter 4

                          CHAPTER 3: WAIT FOR ME

 

 

 

When Khushi left Arnav's house for the first time, her heart was filled with pain but she also felt a heavy burden shift off her which she had been carrying for 2 years. But as she stood in front of Arnav's house, she could feel that burden returning. She kept down the suitcase in her hand, took a deep breath and knocked on the door. The door opened and Arnav stood before her. His face broke into a smile seeing Khushi. He lifted his hand and rubbed Khushi's cheek with the back of his hand. Part of her wanted to push him away but she found herself closing her eyes and savouring his touch. She had craved for his love for so long that nothing felt worth ruining this moment. Arnav leaned close to her ear and whispered," I love you Khushi". She opened her eyes and the barriers she had now built around her to keep Arnav away were back up again. She moved away from him.

Khushi said with tearful eyes, "These words don't mean anything to me anymore Arnav. There was a time when I used to feel elated hearing it but not anymore. You saw to that!"

Arnav eyes grew sad," You have every right to hate me. I was horrible to you when you needed me the most but I promise I'll make up for every moment you were sad because of me. I am sorry for the way I forced you back into my life but I didn't have a choice Khushi. You were going to leave me. I couldn't let that happen"

Khushi shook her head," No need to feel sorry. Once these 7 months pass, things will be alright again."

Arnav thought to himself,"  You are right Khushi. Things will be alright again. We'll be with each other and we'll be happy this time"

Khushi moved past him and entered the house. All the memories she had lived in this house came to her. She remembered her first steps in this house. She was so happy. She had everything that she ever wanted. She never imagined how cruel her fate would turn out. She blocked out all the memories before they could overwhelm her. She went straight to the guest room. She didn't even want to see the room she had shared with Arnav for 5 years. Arnav entered the room and kept Khushi's suitcase on the bed. He had anticipated that Khushi wouldnt want to stay in the same room as him and he didn't want to force himself on her too much and end up losing her.

Arnav offered his hand," Do you need help to unpack?"

Khushi snorted with derision, "I can help myself. After all, I am used to staying alone"

Arnav's heart fell, "Ya, of course. I understand. You can take as much time as you need Khushi. I'll go. I have to leave for office anyway"

Khushi's words had cut through Arnav like a knife. But he was happily accepted the pain. It was a small price to pay for his mistakes. He willing to pay his penance no matter how much painful if it meant having his Khushi back. He went to his room and quickly got dressed and left for office.

Khushi was busy preparing dinner when the door bell rang. she went to attend the door and was shocked to see her parents there. Shashi and garima were standing in front of her looking angry.

Khushi smiled," mom, dad, cmon in. I was just preparing dinner."

"Khushi wait! We are not here to have dinner and you know that", said shashi entering the house

"we will talk about it dad but atleast have some water", smiled Khushi

Shashi asked," what are you doing here? Shouldn't you be at your apartment, your home?"

Khushi shook her head, "dad, this is my home atleast for next 7 months"

"why are you doing this?"

Khushi smiled," why? Dad, court has given us 7 months to stay together and then only we can get divorced"

Garima interrupted," Khushi come back with us. you will only get hurt. There is nothing left here."

Khushi smiled sadly," mom, I know you think there is nothing left but I cant deny the fact that Arnav is my husband. I know he has hurt me a lot and I cannot forget that. But a part of me is still in love with him. I cannot deny that fact. I cant live with him but I cant live without him either. Please try to understand"

Shashi was angry," Khushi he doesn't love you. Whatever he did proves that. I don't want to listen a single word from your mouth. Pack your bags and come with me. I don't care what court says but you are coming with me. I cant leave you here in this hell again. I have seen you suffering and I cant let you go through that pain again"

Khushi was trying to make him understand," dad you don't get it. I just need 7 months. Please don't make it difficult for me. I know you care for me but just for once understand me. I cant leave him. Somewhere deep inside my heart I still love him and though I deny it, I still have a tiniest hope inside me that things will get back to normal. I would have my old happy life with Arnav. I just want to give this a try, just so that I don't ever regret that life gave me a second chance and I lost it."

Shashi interrupted," Khushi please listen to us. garima tell her something"

Garima smiled," Khushi, I am with you. You want these 7 months. Fine I give you."

Shashi was stunned," garima what are you?"

Garima smiled," its ok shashi, you and I both want Khushi to be happy and if this is what she wants then we should support her"

"fine do whatever you both want but dont expect any help or support from me. you are choosing it."

Shashi was angry. He left from there. Garima shook her head," its ok Khushi, he will come around and remember one thing, I will always be with you. Whatever your decision is, I will support you. Bye Khushi. take care" Garima bid her goodbye and left.

Khushi closed the door behind them. She leaned against the door and sighed," I wish I could come with you mom. I want to. I am miserable here. I dont want to stay in this house. Living in this house everyday, seeing his face all the time keeps remaining me of my pain. But despite all this, its hard to let go of him. I dont know what to do, what to feel. But one thing I know is I cant involve you and dad in this mess. I dont want you to live my pain. I'd rather prefer you believing that I am happy here". Khushi wiped away her tears and went back to the kitchen to finish dinner.

After a while, the door bell rang again. Khushi wiped the tears from her cheek and opened the door. It was a delivery man holding a beautiful bouquet in his hand. "Flowers for Mrs. Khushi"

It was a bouquet of red Gerberas, her favourite. Khushi placed the flowers on the table and opened the note in the bouquet.

"Khushi, I know I did wrong by you by treating you badly and I forgot all the promises I made to you when we got married. But when I was on the verge of losing you, only then did I realize how precious you are to me. I would do anything to get a second chance. I hope you will be able to forgive me one day. These flowers are just a symbol of my promise to never hurt you again and love you more and more each day"

A single tear ran down her face. She put the note down on the table and held her head in her hands feeling the rush of emotions making her dizzy. She didn't even see when Arnav entered the house quietly. He walked up to her and put a hand on her shoulder. Khushi jerked her head up, startled.

"Sorry, didn't mean to scare you. Are you ok?"

Khushi simply nodded her head and looked away. Arnav waited for her to say something. Khushi remained silent for a few minutes and then spoke.

"Why are you doing this to me? I had finally made my peace with being apart from you. You have no idea how hard it was for me. And now that I am okay with our separation, you strolled back into my life and made it difficult again. Is this your way of punishing me? Did you decide that your cold behaviour wasn't painful enough for me?"

Arnav was taken aback my Khushi's words. He was angry at Khushi now. He caught her shoulders in a tight grip and shouted, "How could you think that Khushi! You think I am doing all this to try and hurt you again. I am just trying to hold on to the one person I love the most in the world. I am trying to make things right because I feel really guilty for my mistakes. Why cant you understand that."

Khushi smiled sadly, "If you are trying to be the old Arnav for me, then don't bother because he is not there anymore. You know that and you need to accept it. You will never be the same after what happened. You have changed and if you are trying to be someone you are not, you are cheating yourself."

Arnav closed his eyes in pain," Yes, I have changed. I am not the Arnav you married 5 years ago but that does not mean I love you any less. You are still the person who matters to me the most."

"Then why did you hurt me? How do I know you wont hurt me again?"

Arnav sighed, "Because whatever has happened is past. I wont let our past be a burden on our future and I wont hurt you again Khushi. I wont make the same mistake again."

"You never stick by your promises Arnav. You always break them. Like the one you made just now of not hurting me."

Arnav realized he was holding Khushi's shoulders in a painfully tight grip. He loosened his grip but kept his hold on her.

"Khushi, I would never have forced myself on you if I didn't think some part of you still loved me and wants me to be there."

Khushi shook her head, "I don't want you to be here for me. I want you to leave."

Arnav's hand moved down from her shoulder and caught her left hand and lifted it up.

"Then why are you still wearing our wedding ring Khushi? You havent taken the ring off even after you left. This shows that you still havent let go of your love for me and that is enough for me."

Khushi didn't have the words to respond to Arnav. He brought her hand close to his lips and kissed each one of her fingers. He cupped her face with one hand.

"Khushi, I'll fight for us. I'll fight hard to get you back. Hold on to that. I will make everything alright"

                     

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