Pronouns
"Mumma?" 8-year-old Pappu walked up to his mother.
Shireen, who was in the middle of a work call, nodded at him. His mother was working from home and he was helping his father organize his little sister Guddi's birthday party. Pappu almost felt like an owl carrying messages back and forth between his parents.
Pappu hung back, staring at his mom's colleague, curiously.
"It was great speaking to you, Aisha. I'll have the team prepare the report and get back to you... Can you give me a second? My son's here."
Aisha nodded as Shireen focused on her son, who was giving her the looks she was used to. She could almost read the confusion in his head. She wasn't supposed to look like that, or atleast, her name should have been different. It stung her to see that confusion, but she knew that it was not her place to correct it, and she had to get used to it.
"Papa is asking if he can invite Nikhil uncle and Amrit uncle to Guddi's birthday."
"Of course! They are family, aren't they?"
Pappu nodded his head but he was in a trance-like state, his eyes still on her screen.
Aisha Kalra, She/Her
Shireen knew the look.
"Is that all, Pappu?" she asked.
"Mumma, why does it say She/her?"
"Don't be a mother, be a Mumma," Shireen muttered her husband's mantra to herself.
"Because those are her pronouns, Pappu."
Aisha thought Shireen would probably ignore her son's questions like most parents. She blinked in surprise but Shireen's next sentence took her off-guard.
"But I think, Aisha aunty can explain this better than me." Shireen gave her a gentle smile. Aisha took a few seconds to collect her thoughts. The boy looked so young, was Shireen really ok with explaining something so complex and a topic that's mostly considered suitable for adults?
"Do you know what pronouns are, Pappu?" Aisha asked Pappu who nodded.
"Pronouns are used in place of people's names," Pappu replied.
"Good. So, she and her are my pronouns. The reason why I have updated them on my Zoom profile is so that people can read them and not confuse my pronouns."
"But why would they confuse them? Your name is Aisha, and you are a female. What's so confusing about it?"
Aisha smiled at Pappu's innocence. If only everyone had Pappu's sense of clarity.
"But don't I look a little masculine to you?" She asked. Pappu looked at Shireen, who shrugged.
"Mumma says it's wrong to comment on people's looks."
Shireen smiled proudly.
"Are you sure you want me to tell him, Shireen?" Aisha asked, seriously.
"Yes, please."
Aisha sighed. She had had this conversation, but usually, her audience was teenagers who were figuring out their sexuality and their bodies.
"Do you know the female and male body parts?"
"Yes." He named them and Aisha nodded.
"Ok. So, I have the male reproductive organs, but I identify as a woman."
"Why do you do that?" Pappu asked. He wasn't judgmental, just a curious child.
"Nature made a mistake, son," Aisha said humorously.
"Pappu, remember you said how nature was wrong to send me period emails every month when I had replied to it just two times to have you and Guddi?" Shireen interjected, wanting to give Pappu some context and Pappu nodded. Aisha's eyebrows shot up in surprise to see that such a young boy knew about periods. It was good to see his parents guiding him regarding these things than him finding out from wrong sources. She remembered how her parents had ignored her questions, her doubts and how the silence of the adults costed her her self identity for a long period of her life.
"Similarly, nature made a mistake with me. Nature put me in a boy's body, but as I grew up, I realised that I am a girl." Aisha answered.
"Did you write back to nature? You should complain and ask for a refund."
Aisha and Shireen laughed.
"That's not how it works," said Aisha.
"But if you didn't get it corrected, did it not cause you problems?"
"It does. But I'll find a way and get through it." Aisha answered, somewhat dejected. There were times she wishes she could fix it, she knew life would be easier, but then, the surgeries were too costly and she was done living life the textbook and binary way.
"You are very brave, ma'am." Pappu said after a few seconds, wisely. Shireen nodded.
"Thank you. And you are very wise." Aisha smiled.
"I know." he smiled. The two women laughed.
"Pappu?!" Anand called out to his son who was gone for a long time.
"Oops, gotta go, bye." Pappu waved at Aisha and sprinted.
"He is a very wise kid."
"Takes after his father," Shireen answered in acknowledgement of the complement.
"I wish all parents were like you. Mine stopped talking to me when I came out. Gosh! It's been so many years since I spoke to them." Aisha replied sadly.
Pappu, who was standing outside the room, was confused. Why did Aisha's parents stop talking to her? What was Aisha's fault if nature had made the mistake? He ran to his father to ask.
Aisha was done for her day when her phone pinged with Shireen's message. She opened it and it was an invitation to her daughter's birthday.
"You are our family, so you needn't bring gifts. We hope to see you there.
Love,
Guddi and Pappu."
Aisha's eyes were filled with tears. She may not have her family of blood, but she had the chance to build her own family, filled with people as kind as the Watsas.
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