Chapter 18
A/N: Hey there everyone! :D :D Here is the next update! :D :D
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12th March, 2009:
Just a couple of hours till I reach Mumbai!
I cannot believe that I'll be stepping foot in Mumbai exactly after a year and six months. A year and six months! Oh, it still feels like a dream... Sometimes, I still feel that if I pinch myself hard enough, I'll wake up to find myself asleep in the servant's quarters and Baba will enter the room anytime to wake me up for college. Or else Ishaani would come prancing into the room, her rose-and-vanilla scent reaching me before she did.
Ishaani...
I think I can finally say that I'm on the right path towards achieving what I'd set out to do. Another two months later and I'll be officially getting my Masters degree in hand that I can truly be proud of, considering all the hell I went through to make sure that I saw it off properly. These past three months have been very interesting, especially the amount of things I've learnt from my trip to Melbourne. Honestly, there couldn't have been a better opportunity than this with the amount of exposure that Zaveri Sir has given to me in terms of the diamond markets.
After Mota Babuji, if there's anyone who I truly believe to be my well-wisher and my mentor, it's him. He's selflessly been giving me tips and a few tricks under the sleeves about the stock markets and the diamond trading! And it's all just been... bamboozling yet awesome! I can't even wait to get back home and tell Mota Babuji about everything I've learnt. And even above that, share of all my adventures and experiences with Ishaani!
I'm sure that she'll definitely be super-thrilled about all of this!
I can't just wait to get back home and take her into my arms and just let myself go. Drown into her essence and let all of these maddening few months just pass by. I can't wait to stargaze with her again and go to the Marines and have samosas and tea with her, and take her out for long drives where we'll just talk endlessly about everything that's be going on with us from the past eighteen months without any interruption at all. Maybe if time permits, we'll even go to the forest and spend some time there!
Oh, the excitement that's bubbling in my heart!
These ten days are going to be really important for me. Not just because I'll be here for a week and then going to Surat for three days to meet my parents after which I'll be flying down to Sydney and will begin my full-time work with Zaveri Sir. No, I'm going to do the most important thing that I'll ever do in my life. Ever. This is what my life has been building up towards from the last thirteen years. This precise moment. This is where the do-or-die comes that'll decide what the outcome of my life is from this point forth.
I'm going to confess to Ishaani.
You know how Finch has been harping on and on about this since forever now. This is definitely easier said than done! I've dreamt about this moment my whole life! And now that it is right here, I don't know what to do or how to even go about it! God, I feel so stupid but half of the times in this past one week, I've had half a mind not to say anything to her about this at all. I mean come on, what if she doesn't reciprocate and what if I'm just making a fool of myself?
Finch tells me that I'm never to know until I've tried it and confessed it to her. Well, easy for him to say since he's already done with that phase! And honestly, it does not help that Monica's father looked like he would shoot Finch the first time they met after all this (or atleast that's how Finch recounted that infamous meeting to me during his trip to London). What if Mota Babuji has that same look upon his face when he finds out? I know he loves me like a son, but for heavens' sake, he's my God! I revere him!
What if he refuses?
Finch prefers to believe that I'm stupid and that's why he's "dared" me to go ahead and confess to Ishaani after gifting her with the fair copy of Ishaani Parekh: The Enigma Unveiled and the manuscript of Another Night at the Cafe. Well, I want her to be the first one to read the novel since I wrote it just for her. Don't get me wrong - I've been planning to confess to her since over a year now but I don't know... I just keep getting cold feet every time I think about it. It's like a... I don't know, like a sort of unease that I keep feeling every time my thoughts go in that direction.
Ritika seems to agree with Finch wholeheartedly on this matter and tells me that I'm overthinking things. I'm not willing to let go of a past where I was incapable of ever being her equal and that's what is holding me back. I really wish that I was a little more confident than that... I mean, this is Ishaani! She's been my best friend ever since I've known what life is and she's been there with me through thick and thin! Then why won't she be there for me now and why won't she understand me?
But what if she doesn't? What if she really doesn't love me and never can? Ritika tells me that Ishaani is definitely in love with me from all those conversations that we'd have about her, especially about all her little nuances and everything. Ritika tells me that it's impossible that she's not in love with me and maybe she just hasn't told me about it till now because she didn't want to distract me from my goals. I mean, who would sacrifice their happiness for someone like me without even giving it a second thought?
Ritika disagrees with the way I see myself but she agrees with my rhetorical question in general and tells me that if she doesn't love me after this, she's definitely mad not to be in love with me because she just can't see how Ishaani can't be in love with me. Assuring as that is, I'm still too afraid to get my hopes up, even though they just keep going higher and higher every single day.
I know that rather than expecting a hug, I'm definitely going to be getting shoes and slippers from her first because of the whole miscommunication and no-communication thing that's been going on for five months now! But I simply can't believe that she didn't receive any of my letters or my mails! I must have sent her dozens of them! And I've been posting a letter daily from two weeks before her birthday. And yet Mota Babuji tells me that they've received none at all. This is really, really strange and I don't know how it could be possible to be honest.
But what's gone is gone. I need to focus upon the present, and especially about the situation at hand. Right now, Finch and I are both sitting together at the airport, waiting to board our respective flights. He's flying to London for a week to give it a shot with Monica's father again. He has good reason to, since he was the only candidate in the original batch of forty prospects who was finally selected at Freehills as a junior attorney. Finch's officially resigned from the University and will begin working at Freehills from the first of the next month, so he's decided to make good use of his pending vacations.
Finch's been lecturing me on and on about how things will go well with Ishaani and how I'm just being a pessimistic ass about the whole situation. It does not help that he gave me a dare to confess to her when we were both as drunk as we were last week during Ritika's birthday, but well... doesn't help that she was the only sober witness who makes the dare valid. Idiots. In a way it's good too...
I'm scared out of my mind right now!
I don't even know what am I going to do or how am I even going to tell her about it! I know that I want this day to be the most perfect day of my life, just like our Valentine's Day evening. But I want it to be extremely simple as well. Ishaani's never about the grand hullabaloos; she's all about the simple gestures and that's how I want to confess to her - simply. By just speaking my heart out without having to think twice about anything I say.
I'm thinking of confessing to her upon the terrace amidst the stars and the moon. They've been a witness to everything that's transpired between us in these thirteen years, so I think that they more than deserve to be a part of this confession as well. Something like what happened during my eighteenth birthday with all of those promises and those solace-filled embraces. I'm thinking of telling her everything on the 20th - that'd mark the anniversary of our thirteen years of friendship. It's a Friday, and since it's going to be the weekend then, I guess I can take Ishaani to Surat along with me if things work out.
Well, I need to take time out for Maa and Baba as well since I've had absolutely no time to give them at all. I'm going to be calling them for my convocation to Sydney anyway in May, so I'll make sure to have them with me for atleast fifteen days. I'm planning on calling Mota Babuji, Falguni Maa and Ishaani as well, so let's see how it all turns out.
I want to introduce them all to Finch and Ritika for certain!
Well, like you know, Ritika isn't going to join Zaveri Sir for the trek afterall. She's completed her Interior Designing course and is swamped with so many clients right now that it's nearly impossible to take a leave during that time. Mr. Zaveri said that she's postpone the trek for later but Ritika wants him to go for it nonetheless since she doesn't want to take a chance with it. It isn't rocket science that Zaveri sir is ageing and Ritika doesn't want to leave it for later because anything in his health could go wrong, God forbid. Who knows?
She wanted to cancel on some clients, but Zaveri Sir was dead against it. Work first, was all he told her. And now that her business is practically thriving, he doesn't want anything coming in between and he actually told me to convince her not to cancel on her clients as well. It must have been the first time that we must have actually argued and fought tooth and nail upon anything, but in the end we grudgingly managed to come to the conclusion that she was to stay back but Zaveri Sir would be going upon the trek without fail. He had to agree reluctantly.
Well, Ritika didn't give him an option, really.
But atleast Zaveri sir was happy enough with my efforts that he agreed to give me a ten-day off before I started with all the mainstream work and intra-trading. He warned me that doing assistant work and being a mainstream stock trader were absolutely two different things and the latter was a highly stressful job, but I know that I can do it. It's what I'm good at and what I've been doing since so many years now. If I'm going to be doing anything, it has to be this. That's always been the thrill I've been looking for in my life, and the adrenaline gush in those hours at the stock market is something that's just... exhilarating.
I don't want to be stuck with a desk job and I'm sure that when I tell Ishaani about this, she'll definitely agree with me a 100%. God, there's so many things that I want to talk to her about and these ten days (actually just a week with her) feels so short already! I don't know what awaits me when I return back home, but I'm sure that it's all going to be just great. I mean, what can be better than seeing Mota Babuji and Ishaani after all this time? And above that, I'll even be going to Surat to see the new house that Maa and Baba have managed to rent!
Oh great, it's time for me to board my flight now!
Ranveer shut his diary, quickly slipping it into his haversack that he swung it upon his back. Both him and Finch stood up together, looking at the gate anxiously. It was four in the afternoon with the Sydney International Airport abuzz with passengers walking helter-skelter towards their respective gates of boarding while several more sat upon the seats benevolently spread through the various divisions of the gates across the airport.
"Time to board the flight, mate," said Finch just as the two boys hugged.
Ranveer had worn a simple black shirt and blue jeans, completing the attire with a pair of sports shoes. Finch preferred donning a moss green sweatshirt with black jeans and a black leather jacket to go along, his Hush Puppies shoes complementing the attire well. He'd preferred carrying a stroller to accommodate his clothes and necessary documents in.
"All the best! I'm sure Mr. Bradley will give in this time," encouraged Ranveer and Finch rolled his eyes at him.
It was no hidden knowledge that ever since Mr. Bradley had rejected Finch on such harsh grounds, the latter had taken it to his heart and liked to use a bit of colourful language when it came to the old man and how he'd made it so complicated for him and Monica even though he respected his to-be father-in-law.
"I bloody hope he does! If he doesn't, I'm going to marry her right under his nose," muttered Finch darkly and Ranveer couldn't help but laugh at the blotched colour that had crept upon Finch's face.
"Yeah, yeah, I'm sure he will," replied Ranveer hastily just as he stood in line with Finch beside him.
Both the boys stood beside each other in silence for sometime, during which Ranveer continuously kept fidgeting with the band upon his ring finger. He hadn't removed it even once ever since Ishaani had put it upon his finger four years ago.
"You take care now, Vaghela. Alright?" asked Finch suddenly as he pulled Ranveer's arm in his direction so that their eyes met.
Ranveer could see the worry flicker in Finch's blue orbs and gave him a reassuring smile. The nervousness in it didn't go amiss by either and Finch ploughed on.
"And we'll talk once we meet again ten days later! Just tell her everything that's there in your heart and see how it all turns out!"
"I- I don't know, Greg, I'm just worried," confessed Ranveer finally as the line kept getting thinner towards the attendant checking the boarding passes. Finch patted Ranveer's shoulder consolingly.
"Let it go, Ranveer. You've held on for too long to your feelings. Just let them go and tell her what you feel for her," advised Finch kindly.
Ranveer couldn't help but feel a shiver run down his spine every time the thought crossed his mind treacherously, along with the momentary stop in the beats of his heart as it went cold with the bloodcurdling thought.
"What if she doesn't-" he began, but Finch gave him an annoyed look now, instantly guessing what Ranveer was about to say. He'd been talking about the same thing for the past whole month, by the end of which both Finch and Ritika were fed up of him.
"You won't know until you take the leap now, will you?" expressed Finch, hoping that atleast Ranveer would give up on asking the same question over and over again to which no one had the answer to. His friend could be extremely trying at times, Finch had come to learn in that year and five months.
"I guess you're right..." agreed Ranveer grudgingly, handing over his boarding pass to the attendant. She quickly tore off half of it and returned the remaining half with a broad smile upon his face.
Ranveer and Finch quickly gave each other another goodbye hug before Finch whispered to him eagerly.
"f**king right, I am. Go get her, tiger! All the best!"Ranveer blushed inspite of himself as he waved out to Finch once last time and walked through the air bridge, catching a glimpse of Finch quickly running towards his gate. Finch had decided to sit beside Ranveer and give him company since his flight was a hour later than Ranveer's own one that was going to have a stopover at Singapore. Ranveer walked into the Economic class of the Singapore Airlines as he stared at the afternoon sun blaring through the windows of the huge aircraft.
Seating himself comfortably after extracting his diary and pen from the haversack that how sat in the overhead compartment, Ranveer pulled off the cap of the pen and the page of his diary where he'd stopped writing. Smiling to himself, he let the nib mark its course upon the page, penning his emotions and excitement for what lay ahead for him.
This is it, I guess.
It's time to go back home!
Constructive criticism will be more than welcome and sorry for any typos. :D :D
Next chapter:
Epistle 97
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