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Chapter 6

kamila.

@Seriously.

[MEMBERSONLY]

Her happiness floated like waves of ocean along the coast of her life. She found lyrics of her life in his arms but she never sung her song.

_______ Santosh Kalwar

_______________________________________

CHAPTER :- 5

I woke up in the middle of my sleep, in need of water. I walked towards the kitchen.

"Yeah jiju. He is doing good. But I'm scared." I stopped behind, as soon as I heard her words.

"How is uncle doing now?" She suppressed a 'hmm' in return to my brother's talk.

"I'm scared jiju. When he'll came to about uncle, I don't know what he'll do. Its not good, what we are doing. He needs to know about his father's state." What I need to know about my father's state. This word of her ringing in my ears as I strode to her.

"What happened to my father.?" She yanked for my words. Her free hand is clutching her t-shirt over her chest.

"I'll call you later." She placed the phone on the table after cutting the call.

"Sanskaar.." she turned towards me. "I'll explain it to you." She took a step closer to me. I backed off, from where I was before.

"Damn! Swara I want to know what happened to my father." I literally screamed from my lungs.

She jerked in shock, shaky, she took her steps back out of fear. As I walked closer to her.

"I'll tell you, but, you need to get relax first." I just pranced on her pinned her on the wall. Squeezed her muscles, where my hands were holding her, her arms.

"I want to get to know, now." She squinted her eyes as I gritted my teeth close to her mouth.

"I'll tell you." She is making me hysteric I'm losing my temper over her silent.

"Swara... he is my father I need to know about him." I breathed over her face, tears clouding, she squirmed as my breath touched her.

She closed her eyes, letting her salty tears made a trial on her pink cheeks. "Uncle had an heart attack. Under gone... an open heart surgery fifteen days before." I left my hold on her, and backed off from her. "We hid that from you," she stopped, her eyes watching me wryly, "keeping your state of mind, and it's not good for uncle to see you like this..." She stopped not wanting to use that word at my face. Which my father usually use to address me.

"An useless." Lowered my head, "a failure." Words slipped my lips, dryly. I hate myself.

"No, not that, uncle will get hurt, seeing you hurting yourself." She finished. For the first time I wanted to believe her words. And I did.

Swara---

"I'm such a sadist. I'm not a good son." He mumbled in his breath as he backing off from me.

"Because of me, Everyone is suffering. If I die everything, become normal." His face expression become null. He is not in hysteric but intimidating, it's scaring me. No... no I can't give up. When I was debating myself he rushed to his room and locked the door.

I knocked the door.. "Please Sanskaar. Uncle is fine now." I didn't get any response from him, a fainted weeping sound of him leaked through the gaps of the door.

"Sanskaar open the door." I knocked again, no response but I can here his sobbing. I can't see him cry.

"Leave me alone... Please." His cry reached my ears.

"I'll be in my room... If you need... anything, in case." With that I left to my room.

Why fate is soo cruel on him, he didn't deserve this, not anyone. The fact is killing me, that I can't do anything to make his life good. I can't. He needed sometime, sometime to fight with in him. Ohh god!!! please give him strength, please. I wanted to be his side, console him, give him strength and courage. All I can do is, sitting on my bed hugging my knees, crying my heart out.

I can't sleep it's past midnight, I'm still on the same position, crying.

"I don't want to be alone." I lifted my head hearing upon his trembling voice, the hoarseness was clear due to continuous crying. I feel the tears which is automatically rolling down my cheeks.

"Can I sleep here with you." I nodded and moved myself little far into the bed, gave him space of his own on the bed.

He walked towards the bed taking his place in front of me on the bed, before I could comprehend, I felt him on me, his hands were locked around my neck, his head is rested on my shoulder, his chest pressed against mine, I can feel my t-shirt getting drenched up on my shoulder. Involuntarily, my hands scurried on his back, reached his hairs. His sobs resides as I slowly let my hands ran over his hairs, letting my nails to scrap his scalp.

"I'm an horrible son Swara. I made my father sickened." I felt my own cheeks getting wet.

Oh my moon, you're my soul,

my another half,

what is making you sad?

Rest your grieving heart in my lap,

that is waiting to hold you.

As long as human survive.

Time will move on, so will your sorrow.

Fallen seeds will grow

into a strong and life full

Tree.

Pulling from the hug, I made him to face me, "No, you're not." He rested his forehead on mine,

"You're lying. I'm nothing but a failure."

The weights of sorrow, added on,

with time.

Yearning to see millions of smiles,

with you.

Hold me, you're, the apple of my eye.

Rest your head, on my shoulders, you.

Let us live a life beyond the skies,

earth & wind.

"Shhh Sanskaar everything is going to be alright." I rubbed my cheeks on his. "It will take time." Hugged him, bringing him close to my heart.

Oh my moon, you're my soul,

my another half,

what is making you sad?

Rest your grieving heart in my lap,

that is waiting to hold you.

As long as human survive.

Time will move on, so will your sorrow.

Fallen seeds will grow

into a strong and life full

Tree.

I slowly lied back dipping my body further into the mattress, he rested his head over my collarbone, his hands were tightly around my waist. I ran my hand over his hairs. His breath returning to normal, he slowly drifted into a sleep. We all know love gives pain but still why we choose it. He don't deserve this neither do I. Staying away from our family. Living a meaningless life. Why???? Sleep abandoned me again.

MORNING...

I woke up hugging her, it felt good and right. When I lifted my head up to see her sleeping face, she was already awake, smiling down at me.

"Morning." I can't help it I smiled back at her. "Morning." I pulled myself off of her, into a sitting position.

"How are you feeling now.?" She dragged herself backward, rested her back against the headrest.

"Like a shit." Still tears are threatening me.

"Look Sanskaar I can't say the situation is good and everything is okay, but it'll turn okay, will become good. You have to stay strong Sanskaar, for you, for uncle, for jiju, for me." I lifted my head to look at her. The dark circles and puffy red eyes said to me that she lost her sleep for many days. But why??? She placed her hand over mine which is on the bed. "You have to stay strong. Will you." I nodded. "You're not alone Sanskaar I'm with you, we can go through this together." Looking into my eyes, I never thought that her eyes can do wonder, it's giving me strength. "Okay!!!" Her was voice whisper, filled with hesitant. Again I nodded. Why she have to do this.???

"Go and freshen up, I'll prepare breakfast for us." With that she left to washroom.

I walked to my room dumbfounded with her response and care. Which left me with questions. Now I'm not alone here like before, I have her, who is looking out for me, bringing my old self from me. All I have to do is cooperate with her.

-------

It's been twenty days since my breakdown. She is the one who held me together. For some reason I abide to her, giving her an access to control my life, my heart and mind. The funny thing is she never tried to break it or to use my weakness against me like the way she used to do back in the history of our life. Not with everyone you can do this, just few people worth the trust, she won mine. I don't know did everything in between us will remain same like now. As for now I'm standing in the veranda, leaning down, balancing my elbows on the railings. She walked to me with a pair of mugs in her hands, handed me one, a hot chocolate milk with three marshmallows floating on top. Since it's nearing the winter. It's freezing even before snowfall. It's going to be my first winter here.

"Thanks." Standing straight I taken a mug from her.

"Why are you still following those formalities. They sucks." She acted puke, while leaning over the railing, balancing her elbows over it. I followed her posture.

"I'm sorry, miss-im-not-formal. I won't use those three magical words to you." I took a sip. "I can give whatever you want for this hot chocolate," Took another sip. "And marshmallows."

"What are those magical words.?" She raised her eyebrows. By taking a sip, a smile formed on my face seeing a foam mustache on her's. I slowly leaned forward, wiped her lips.

"Please, sorry, thank you." I laughed seeing her shock.

"Hey!!! That counts four including 'you'." She elbowed my arm, we laughed.

"Can I ask you one thing." She scrunched her eyes along her nose.

"I said no formalities, just go on." She shook her head for me proceed, I smiled.

"Why are you growing your hair.?" She almost sputtered her chocolate.

"Why this... sudden... weirdest question popped in your miraculous mind." I pursed my lips out. Seriously I do know, is she changing herself for someone. I want to know is their anyone in her life, yeah that too counted. Sudden interest in her personal life. If I'm falling for her, hmmm I'm not confident about that.

"Answer it." She nodded.

"First of all one correction, I'm not growing it, it's growing on its own, I just stopped cutting it." She shrugged her shoulders.

"That's what I'm asking, why??" She raised her eyebrows.

"Why???" She repeated my question. "Do you ever waited in a parlour almost nearly half a day just for cutting your hair. It sucks man. And those gossips they spread," she shook her head in disgust. "And the water they spray right on your face, it just initiate my sinus problem." She rubbed her finger over her nose, "growing your hair won't harm you." I smiled softly.

"Stupid kooky idiot." It was me who sputtered the chocolate this time.

"Why?? What I did?" I asked her by wiping my lips.

"I was talking about my neighbor, that bitch." She pointed her mug at her three o'clock direction. I followed her gesture there stands a man around the age of mid thirty. With a sports jogger. She waved her hands at him as soon as he saw us.

"Ohh!! My jeez!! He is coming on our way, God please spare me." She said keeping a smiling face at him. He jogged to us.

"Hey suuura." He wiggled his hand as soon as he reached us.

"Hey Mason... I was talking about you to him." She crossed the few steps by jumping to the ground, reaching him and taken his hand in a good hand shake.

I watched her locking her hands behind her. "Sanskaar.." I walked down to her.

"This is my friend. Sanskaar." I was about shake his hand, she held it in her's, She pinched my palm when I tried to release it. "Soo Mason. How is it going on, ahh your date with David." A shy smile spread on his face. He lowered his head, she rolled her eyes at me.

"It just going awesome." He scratching his mane as his face flushed. Ohh he is blushing. She gave a look at me. I rolled my eyes.

"Okay I'll see you later. Suuura." She waved her at him. I smiled and nodded at him.

"Eww I have to wash my hand." She drew her hand away from her.

"I thought you're soo happy to shake your hand with him." She acted puke..

"If I haven't shook my hand, he would've hugged me. Who knows where he kept his hand before. He is such a nasty fellow Sanskaar."

"Really!!!" I raised my eyebrows. I can't believe her she is speaking all nice to him but behind his back, she is puking.

"When I say it, you gotta believe it." She jerked her thumb over her shoulder, there he was making out at his porch with a man. I coughed my empty mouth. "That's it, Man." She flicked her index finger at me.

She proceeded to walk into the house, by taking the empty mugs with her. I followed her inside.

"Soo you're jealous of him." She suddenly turned on her heels. I needed to jerked stop to avoid the collision.

"Really!!! with Mason." She laughed clutching her stomach as she making faces at me. "You're ridiculous Mr.Maheswari." she sputtered in her laugh. "Actually I saved you Mr." She walked away by stomping her legs. "David was his third date of this week. Who knows you may turn as his fourth."

"Uhh!!! You really think that about me." A sly smile formed on her face.

"You're underestimating Mason's charm Sanskaar. He'll swoon you within this." She snapped her fingers on my face.

"No way. I won't get swooned by anyone." I took a step forward, to reduce the gap. "Try me." I slid my hand at her hip placed it at her lower back, pushing it, pulled her to me, closing the gap. Her eyes widened, her lips parted as she gasp for air. Her body stiffened at my mere touch. I scurring my free hand fingers through her lock of hairs, tugging it behind her ear. She closed her eyes as I rubbed my thumbs over her cheek. I slowly traced my finger over the edge of her lips, she parted her lips as I ran my finger over her lips.

SWARA...

"See I'll be the one whom girls are swoon by. I'm all into girls." I opened my eyes hearing his words, his smirky face slowly evolved in my sight. His finger still on my lips. I must show him it's not that easy to swoon a girl, especially me. I slowly opened my lips, bit his finger harder.

"Ahhh." He screamed and jerked his finger from my mouth.

"See!!! it's hard to swoon a girl, especially me." I walked away but not without a smirk and a shrug. He followed me.

"Accept it that you felt something." Hrrmmm I always feel many thing, what he is asking me.

"Nooo." Lie.

"Ahh yes.!!!" He chirped.

I turned around to face him. "No." I stated casually, but I was all sweating inside.

"I know you felt it." He stated firmly.

"How can you say that.??? Hann." I smacked my palm on his left upper arm.

"Because I felt it too. What you sensed." He stopped abruptly, Im happy that my widened eyes didn't fell at his feet. He walked away as he realized what he has spilled. He need to stop this, leaving me open mouth. Hey I might catch flies.

He didn't show up for the rest of the morning, until he walk out of his room informed me that he is going in search of job. Since he misused his access in the lab to take the drugs for his own use he was banned to work in any lab. Now I'm alone in my home. It's quarter past eight in the evening, I'm still waiting for him to return, sitting on the steps of my porch.

SANSKAAR...

After a tremulous day, I reached home, walking, I found her waiting for me at steps, why??? Eyes were heavy with tears and sleep. Walking back to her was the best about this day. A sweet smile bloomed on her lips, no, all over her face. Enlightened me. Just her single weak smile can do wonder to me.

"Hey back home." She smiled some more and walked to me, gave a side hug, walking along with her, if anyone said this to me, six months back, that I'll walk with this Miss. impossible Swara Gododia hand in hand into her house. I'm sure I would have died laughing. But now it feels good, her every actions healing me, let it be her sweet weak smile, let it be her orders at me, let it be her tease, let it be her giggles which was a siren sound before. Now that's sounds like a song of a siren.

"Feel hungry??" Taking my nod as her answer, she walked into the kitchen to reheat whatever she made for dinner. How can I forget about her cooking, just like my mom, she knows what I like to eat, I'm feeling guilty for not knowing anything about her. She never exist for me before, but without her I am nothing, but a carbagge. Taking a look at her before leaving to my room. I had a long day, I need a warm bath.

Walking back to the kitchen I found her sitting on the chair, waiting for me, I walked to the round table took my chair opposite to her. She served me. I don't know why, but nowadays I love looking at her face. Lowered my eyes when she lifted her eyes to see me. Damn where is the man in me.

"Got any luck." She asked me as her mouth chewing a piece of chapati. I shook my head as her answer. "You'll get it." With said she went silent. The rest of the dinner gone numb. I can't feel the taste of the food. My heart and my nerves felt numb thinking about my fate.

------

I jerked from my sleep, hearing a loud noise of utensils. I tip toed, reached the kitchen, with a baseball bat in my hands which I held high in the air to assault the intruder. Lights were on, but I can't see anyone there. I walked closer to the island. There she is sitting on the floor near the island, totally devastated. I dropped the bat, ran to her held her by her shoulders. Her eyes were puffy. She must have been crying for long. Seeing me she burst into a cry, again.

"Sanskaarrr.." wailing my name.

"What happened Swara.?"

"I don't know what to do Sanskaar.. for tomorrow."

"What you have to do for tomorrow.?"

"Tomorrow I have to attend a cancer campaign. Need to cook foods and sell them to collect money for campaign and and..." She stopped her blabber, started to sob

"Shh Swara. You can make it I'm with you. We can do it."

"But I don't have enough time to prepare everything, that required." I cupped her face made her see me.

"Then we prepare which is easy and quick." She nodded her head.

"We need a third hand." I nodded, this third hand what's mean this. "I need to make a call." She got up from the floor walked away to her room.

When she came back, there was this white man with blue eyes walked in next to her. Taller than me, handsome too. I felt this unusual twinge in my heart, what it is.???

"Sanskaar.. this my friend com boss Nick." He held his hand out for me to shake.

"I'm Sanskaar." I said locking my hand with his.

"Just now she called your name man." He said blankly and walked away, one thing is sure he doesn't like me. But why????.

They both walked into the kitchen leaving me in the living room. I followed them. Watched them having a chat, playing, cutting vegetables, moving around the kitchen. Cooking. After baking, grilling, toasting, boiling, frying. They declared that the food was ready to sell. Nick left the house, Swara to her room to get ready for the event.

"Sanskaar are you there.??" I heard her scream from her room.

"Yeah!!" I said from the hall.

"Are you coming.??" She screamed again.

"Yes." I shouted.

"Then get ready man. Breakfast is being prepared there at the park." She yelled. I walked to my room.

AT PARK...

I watched her whirling around the booth, reheating the food serving, I'm taking in charge of billing. There are many stalls have been spread along the park. They volunteering for a good cause. I'm happy to be here. She is sweating. There were another three persons preparing foods. One among was Nick he is close to her, more than anyone I have seen, other than Pete. Pete, he got sick lately, was hospitalized for the past one week. Doing better now. Will be discharged soon. Coming back to Nick, he is hugging her, kissing her on her head, though it was a friendly gesture, it's making me sick, really sick. I'm trying to divert my mind, I can't, I never felt this much helpless in my life. I turned my face away from them, and concentrate on the queue in front of me.

HOUSE...

After packing everything, settling and paying the suppliers, we reached my home, everyone. There stood a surprise at my porch. "Pete." I ran to him screaming his name. That was a pleasant surprise. Hugging him, then his mother. We walked in. Everyone dropped in my home. It's like our ritual. After every food carnival, we crush in my home the whole night partying. I'm very excited for tonight. No alcohol is allowed here. Then my dad and will kill me.

Entering the living room, dropping the bag on the couch, I headed to kitchen to prepare some beverages, some mocktails, some hot chocolate milk.

SANSKAAR...

Slumping on the couch next to Paul, her colleague. Who helped her in the stall in preparation. "Paul tea or coffee." She screamed from the kitchen, her voice was hoarse from continuous screaming for rates and list of foods in the park.

"Want a tea, sweety, your special." He shouted back. 'Sweety' he called her that. Again I felt that twinge.

"Boss." He smiled at Nick who slumped on the floor.

"Yo Paul." He addressed him lazily. Slumping more on the floor.

They talked. I got up from the couch walked to my room, I don't want to be a third wheel.

"Sanskaar please help me with this." Her request stopped me. I walked towards the kitchen. Was invited by a tray full of colourful drinks, which were displayed on the table, and a tray full of nachos, dips, salsa, some salads were placed. A lot of food for five persons. I heard a bell rang.

"I'm getting it." I saw Paul walking to the door. A minute later screams and squeaky sounds were heard. A lot more people. I need to move to my room. But was stopped, when she dragged me along with her to the living room.

"They are my colleagues." I smiled at them, it's a mob standing around us. They all greeted.

------

It's around the midnight. The party was all swing, music blasting through the woofers, couples dancing around, what awed me is the songs, all Hindi old songs. Muhammad Rafi, Kishore, Mukesh were singing. And the Americans dancing for those beats.

The BGM bramachari movie song blasted, the people gathered swiftly moved, revealing Swara and her boss Nick, right in the center, their back facing each others, shaking their upper body, rhythmically. Taking a slow steps the moved forward. My jaws dropped.

Ajkal Tere Mere Pyar Ke Charche

Har Zubaan Par

Sab Ko Maloom Hai

Aur Sabko Khabar Ho Gayi. x2

They are mimicking mumtaz and shammi Kapoor. Turning and twisting their body, dancing together. Liping the lyrics. Paul joined them, in their rock n roll, snapping his fingers, shaking his head, folding his right leg up, she danced in between them. Tip toeing on the floor, twisting their hips they made a 180 degree turn to their left. Flopping their shoulders, shook their heads.

Humne To Pyar Mein

Aisa Kaam Kar Liya

Pyar Ki Raah Mein

Apna Naam Kar Liya x2

Aajkal Tere Mere...

Nick kept his hand on her shoulder, turning, brought her attention to him. She threw her hands on his shoulders, dipping his head down, placed it over her forehead. He sung. Swara walked back, taking a small steps, he matched her, in forward.

Leaning down locking right hand around her waist, another holding her hand. Waltzing around the hall, twisting her round around him. Pulling her back, bending her down, holding her left knee, lifting it up, if I didn't feel the twinge again in my heart I would have clapped my hands for that pose.

Standing, locking her hands around his neck, his, were on her waist. She sung,

Do Badan Ek Dil

Ek Jaan Ho Gaye

Manzilen Ek Hui

Humsafar Ban Gaye x2

Aajkal Tere Mere...

Caressing his cheek, looking deep into his eyes, she words out those words.

Manzilen Ek Hui

Humsafar Ban Gaye.

Pushing her, twisting, she whirled out of him, I hold her from falling as she landed on me.

Kyon Bhala Hum Daren

Dil Ke Malik Hain Hum

Har Janam Mein Tujhe

Apna Mana Sanam x2

Swinging, suddenly Nick fell to the floor near my feet,and mimicked Shammi's actions, reciting words by pointing his index finger at me. Man he must have byhearted that song. Exact expressions at exact timing.

Har Janam Mein Tujhe

Apna Mana Sanam.

Swara walked to him, holds her hand out to him, taking it, he hoisted himself on the floor.

Aajkal Tere Mere Pyar Ke Charche

Har Zubaan Par

Sab Ko Maloom Hai

Aur Sabko Khabar Ho Gayi

Again shoulder shaking, hands twisting, rock n roll. It was fun to watch them dance, bit that twinge still there in my heart. By the end of the song everyone clapped there hands.

It's around the dawn, almost everyone left, except the man who is sitting in front of me. Talking, laughing with her. I really wanted to know what they have, what's there in his words for her to laugh like that. I turned my attention to the TV which is shouting for the past two hours.

When I turned my attention towards the people sitting just away from me, There she is fell asleep on his lap. Without knowing how the view burning my inner soul. The way he is caressing her hairs. I can see love in his blue eyes and in his touch.

"You love her." I voiced out my doubt at him.

"Yes." He said the very next second. I thought he'll say no. May be I wished to. His hands were still akin on her. One is holding her hand which she laid on her stomach one is caressing her hairs.

"Does she knows that.?" He smiled seeing my curiosity.

"She knows from the beginning." She knows, I never knew about that.

"What she said.?" I asked again. I can see a bit of pain and longingness in his eyes as it scurring over her face.

"She said..." He took a long pause. "She said no." I felt relieved, I don't know why, but I felt like that. And I don't know why she said no to him. He is rich and looking handsome. He can earn money too. But why.??

I decided to stay quite for a while as my mind making lot of queries to shoot at him. A minute while later I lifted my head to ask a query of mine. He was slept by sitting, still carrying her in his lap, holding her hand, his left hand still on her hairs. His head was supported on the armrest of the couch. I can see a genuineness in him for her.

[NOCOPY]

Sorry for this delayed update, hope it worth the wait. Happy news, This story going end with next chapter.

Hope you liked it. If so, please make me to feel it. Forgive the typos.

Love you all.

Kam.