Chapter 11

alina.b

@alina.b

--- Suman’s POV ---

2 years later in Bhopal…

I packed my luggage as I was getting ready to go to another mission in Kutch, Gujarat near the border. Maa packed me some food and told me to take care of myself. She has been my biggest support in these past two years. I sighed sadly and picked my son up into my arms. I gave him a big kiss on his chubby cheeks and said, “I’m sorry that I’ll be missing your first birthday, Sagar”. Sadly, this was the reality of army life, we had to sacrifice special moments in our life for the sake of our country. I turned to Maa and said, “I hope when he grows up, he doesn’t think I’m a bad mother”. 

Maa hugged me, “Don’t be sad. When he grows up, he’ll be so proud of his brave and selfless mother”. I said my goodbyes to Maa and Sagar, who wouldn’t let go of me. I was on the verge of tears as this was the first time I would be away from him for so long. 

On the train, I looked out the window and reflected how much my life had changed in just two years but I never spent a single day without thinking about him. I hadn’t seen Shravan since we last met at his award ceremony. The pain in his eyes still haunts me today. He had so many questions but I didn’t know how to answer him. I married Anish because it was Daadu’s last wish. Yes, Daadu told me I could marry Shravan but by saying only after he dies, I knew that he didn’t really mean it. My love for Daadu won over my love for Shravan.

Marrying Anish was the biggest mistake of my life. The only good thing that resulted from that marriage was Sagar. Soon after our marriage, Anish and I started having fights as he became insecure when I was promoted to Major, a rank above him. He wanted me to change my last name but I refused as I wanted to honor my father. Day by day, our fights got worse. I gave into family pressure and had a baby thinking that it would save our marriage but I was wrong. Initially, we fought about naming our son. Then, Anish tried to pressure me into leaving the army and staying at home to care for our baby. I stood my ground and refused to quit as I worked hard my whole life to get to where I was. 

The last thread was when I found out he was cheating on me with Devika. When I confronted him, he had the audacity to accuse me of cheating and said that Sagar was Shravan’s son. He slapped me when I snidely replied that I wished that were true as Shravan would have been a better husband and father anyways. That night, I took Sagar and went back to my mother’s home. After a few weeks, I filed for divorce. My lawyer said that the divorce could take up to two years but I didn’t care because I knew that I couldn’t spend the rest of my life with Anish.

As I arrived at the base in Kutch, I was shocked to see Anish there. He smirked, “Hello soon-to-be-ex-wife. Long time no see”. I ignored him and started unloading with my regiment. He continued talking, “I won’t let you have Sagar’s custody or any alimony. I will make sure that this divorce completely destroys you”. I clenched my fist and turned to answer Anish but suddenly we were all called to attend a meeting. 

I stepped into the conference hall and was surprised to see Shravan there. I didn’t know he was also a part of this mission. I smiled seeing him laughing with the Colonel. I kept tabs on Shravan in these past two years. All the top Generals assigned important cases to him as he was one of the most diligent and hardworking officers. I felt so proud of him. The Colonel motioned me to come over. He looked at Shravan and said, “Major Shravan, this is-”

I was expecting to see hatred in Shravan’s eyes but instead he gave a soft smile, “I know. Captain...oops my bad...MAJOR Suman Tiwari”. He beamed with pride but there was a hint of sadness in his eyes. The Colonel said we along with two other Majors would be in charge of the base with Shravan as the commanding officer. My heart fluttered seeing Shravan after such a long time. Besides the dark circles under his eyes, he still looked the same. It couldn’t be a mere coincidence that we have been assigned to the same mission again. But, then I remembered about my pending divorce and complicated life. I wanted to keep Shravan away from that mess. 

Our Juniors saluted us. I watched Anish intently. When the Colonel announced that Shravan was appointed as the commanding officer, the jealousy on Anish’s face was evident. I smirked. In school, he always treated Shravan inferiorly because he was a civilian and today, Anish is saluting him.

Shravan and I were always busy with work so we didn’t talk much. I wondered if Shravan even ever slept because he was always in his office working. Although Shravan was cordial, I felt like he was purposely trying to keep a distance from me. 

One day while patrolling, I saw a little girl hiding. I stopped my jeep and she ran into my arms crying. She had bruises on her face and frantically said, “Please help me. They will kill me”. I saw a car coming with village gangsters. I quickly hid the girl behind my jeep and she told me what was happening. She and her sister had been kidnapped from their village and were being kept in a building nearby. Unfortunately, her sister was unable to escape.

I promised her that I would rescue her sister and bring them safely to their village. I spoke into my transmitter, “Hello, Major Suman Tiwari here...is anyone at the base?” 

“Major Shravan Malhotra here. What is the issue?” My skin tingled hearing his voice. I explained to him the situation and told him that I was initiating a rescue operation. Shravan replied, “This might be a case of human trafficking. Carry out the operation and I am leaving right now with a team. We will track your location and be there in approximately thirty minutes...be safe”. 

I was following the car from a distance but unfortunately, they caught on. The girl hid behind me as one of the goons tried to grab her. I pointed my gun at his head and clenched through my teeth, “Don’t you dare touch her. Where is her sister?” 

The goon smirked at me, “Hmm...a pretty face like you is in the Army? Are you allowed to point a gun at a civilian like this?” 

I held my aim. “Stop your nonsense. If necessary, I will shoot. Civilians like you shouldn’t have guns in the first place. I’m asking again, where is the girl?”

The goon scoffed, “Are you threatening me? One call and the girl will be dead”. The little girl started to cry and I consoled her. The goon laughed, “It’s better if you put your gun down and cooperate with us. I will hand over the girl to you but what will you give me in return?” 

I looked confusedly at him, “What do you want?” 

He leered at me,“Well, I could ask for a lot but how about favors from your army? No one will know”. 

“Okay...I will think about it. But, how can I trust you?” I lied to the man that I would help him but the truth was something illegal was happening and I had to find out the truth. 

He laughed, “Well...I could ask the same. How can I trust you? You will have to come to our hideout with us and I will hand over the girl as long as you keep your word. We are dangerous people and if we don’t get our demands, you have no idea what we are capable of doing. Don’t think about sending army soldiers after you because I will kill you all. So, it will be best if you cooperate”. I nodded as he took my gun from me and crushed my transmitter. I was taking a huge risk but I had already promised the girl. Besides, Shravan said he would arrive with a team and I trust him. He won’t let anything happen to me. 

They blindfolded me and took me to their hideout. From overhearing conversations, it was confirmed that these goons were traffickers. A rough hand touched my face and said, “Such a beautiful face. I think it would be better if we keep her rather than deal with the army...”. 

I twisted his hand and said, “You messed with the wrong girl. You don’t know what I’m capable of doing”. 

Just then, the door slammed open and I heard a loud voice, “Step away from her”. I could recognize that voice from anywhere. The goon roughly turned me around and placed a cold gun at my temple. My blindfolds fell off and I saw Shravan standing with a gun in his hand. His eyes were full of anger as he concentrated on the goon. 

Anish and a couple of soldiers were behind Shravan. Anish looked around with fear as he realized that the gangsters outnumbered them. He said to Shravan, “This is an unauthorized rescue mission started by Major Suman then why should we have to risk our life for her? She should deal with the consequences. Besides, we don’t even know for sure if the girls she is rescuing are Indian”. 

Shravan firmly said, “She took permission from me, the commanding officer. If you’re scared for your life, you can go but I’m not leaving without completing this operation”. Anish left with his soldiers. I smirked thinking to myself that Anish will never change...selfish coward.  

The gangster laughed, “You will get killed. You should’ve left with them”. Shravan walked closer while still aiming his gun. The goon’s eyes widened in fear and pressed the gun harder against my temple. “Don’t come any closer or I’ll shoot her. Put your gun down”. Shravan stopped in his tracks as his eyes flickered towards me. 

His eyes changed and they were full of concern as he realized that I was unarmed. He put his gun down on the ground and put his hands up as he walked closer. “Look...I come here in peace. Hand over the girls and I will fulfill your demands. Just let the girls go”. That’s when I noticed that a man behind Shravan picked up the gun and aimed it at Shravan. My eyes grew as I realized that he was going to shoot Shravan. I jabbed my elbow into the ribs of the man holding me and snatched his gun. Shravan looked at me confusedly as I aimed the gun over his shoulder and shot the goon behind him. Shravan looked at me with big eyes as he realized that I saved his life. I smirked at him. I will always have his back...literally. 

I turned my gun to the goon and said, “See, I told you I was the wrong girl to mess with”. 

The goon called for his henchman to come fight with us. He looked at me angrily and said, “You two will not make it out alive from here”. One of the men pulled the little girl and her sister as they cried. I noticed that the sister was wearing a vest with bombs attached to it. The goon pulled out a remote and pressed a button. “You have five minutes. Save yourself or the girls”. Shravan shot at the goon’s arm and he moved away from me. 

Shravan ran towards me and grabbed my face, “Are you okay? Are you hurt anywhere?” I was taken back by how worried he was. It was the first time I saw fear in his eyes. 

I panickedly said, “Shravan, there’s a time bomb on one of the girls. We have less than five minutes. What do we do?” Just then, we saw a bunch of men with guns and weapons approaching us to attack. 

Shravan and I stood with our backs against each other as we aimed our guns at the goons around us. Shravan slightly turned his head towards me and whispered, “I can’t finish them off alone. We’ll split up and get rid of these gangsters. At the two minute mark, take the girls and escape through the route on your left. I’ll keep them busy here and once I finish them off, I’ll come to you. We have to be quick”. Together, we continued fighting and making sure the other was safe. I was aware that Shravan was a good strategist but this was the first time I saw him in action. It is obvious why he is considered one of the best officers. At the two minute mark, Shravan gave me a cue to escape with the girls.

I picked up the girls and ran quickly out of the building and hid around the corner. The girls started crying and I consoled them trying to keep them quiet so we wouldn’t get caught. I looked down at the timer as it was counting down. I felt helpless as I didn’t know how to disable a bomb. I looked at the girl’s innocent face and my own son’s face flashed in front of my eyes. 

Just then, Shravan ran out and I frantically said, “Shravan, there are only thirty seconds left. I don’t know how to disable a bomb. What are we going to do now?” 

He said, “Don’t panic. I know how to disable bombs. Thirty seconds is enough”. He pulled out a plier from his boots and carefully grabbed a wire as he examined the bomb. The girl started crying and Shravan softly said, “Hey, I promise I won’t let anything happen to you. Trust me”. The girl nodded and Shravan quickly continued working. My heart was racing as there were only ten seconds left. Shravan gulped and shook his head, “I don’t know how to disable this type of bomb. But, I’ve done enough that we can safely take the vest off of her”. He quickly took the vest off and threw it far from us as it blew up. I clutched both of the girls tightly to my chest shielding them from the explosion. I felt Shravan’s chest slam against my back as he protectively wrapped his arms around us. 

We heard footsteps around the corner so we picked up the girls and started running. Shravan grabbed my wrist and said, “I parked the jeep over here”. We made the girls sit in the back and covered them. Shravan looked at them and said, “Whatever happens, stay down”. The girls nodded their heads nervously. 

We sat in the jeep and Shravan started driving in the opposite direction. “Shravan, where are you going? The base is in that direction”. 

“I know the location of the village that you mentioned. We can return the girls safely to their families and get their statements. We will be wasting time if we go back to the base”. Just then, a bullet whizzed past us. We were being followed and the goons continued shooting at us. 

I looked at Shravan, “Whatever happens, don’t stop the jeep”. I turned around and started shooting at the goons. Shooting was one of my expertise and I shot down the goons. My hand slipped but Shravan caught my arm preventing me from falling off the jeep. 

At night, we reached the village. The girls were reunited with their parents who were very thankful. Since it was raining, they offered us to stay in a hut nearby for the night. We stepped inside the tiny hut and Shravan started a fire to keep us warm. Shravan turned around and stretched out his hand. I looked confusedly at him as I didn’t know what he was asking. He softly said, “Your right wrist...it’s red and swollen. I think you sprained it”. I looked down at my wrist and to be honest, I didn’t even notice that I hurt myself. 

He made me sit down on the bed and kneeled in front of me. He held my wrist and pulled out a spray from his boots. I giggled, “How do you fit so many things inside one boot? First the pliers and now this spray? What else are you hiding in there?”

He chuckled, “I noticed you hurt your wrist so I grabbed it when we were leaving the jeep”. He applied the spray and wrapped my wrist with his handkerchief. He looked up, “It’s not too tight, is it? Make sure to see a doctor when we get back”. Sometimes, I can’t believe that he’s the same spoiled teenager I met years ago in Bhopal. 

The family had given us some clothes to wear as our clothes were covered in sand. Shravan turned around as I changed into my clothes. While he was changing, he heard him hiss in pain. I quickly turned around and saw the burns on his back. He must have gotten them when he was shielding us during the explosion. Shravan saw the worried expression on my face and tried to reassure me that he was fine. I looked angrily at him, “No, you’re not fine! I’m going to see if they have any ointment”. 

While I was waiting for the ointment, the family prepared dinner for us. During this time, I started asking them about how the girls were kidnapped and if similar cases had been reported. I started gathering information from them. As the lady handed me the ointment and food, she said, “I can’t thank you and your husband enough for rescuing our children. I wish that you two will always be happy together”. I smiled and nodded. I’m not sure what made her think we were a couple. I should’ve corrected her but I didn’t. For some time, I wanted to pretend like that was the truth. 

As I walked in, I awkwardly said to Shravan, “Umm...they didn’t have enough plates so they asked us to eat on the same plate. Is that okay? Also, the ointment is homemade so make sure to see a doctor tomorrow”.

I made him lie down on his stomach on the bed as I applied the ointment on his burns. There was an awkward silence between us. Shravan broke the silence and said, “Thanks for saving my life today. You were pretty cool back there, Major Suman. I was impressed by how good your aim is...I haven’t seen anyone that accurate at shooting”. 

I smiled, “You weren’t too bad yourself, Major Shravan. I guess, we make a good team...don’t we?” Then, I told him about my conversation with the family. Shravan assigned me to this case as I already had information on it. I smiled to myself realizing that Shravan and I worked well together. As I finished applying the ointment, I bandaged his burns and helped him wear his kurta. 

He looked at me and said, “Should we eat? I’m starving!” We washed our hands and sat across from each other. We put the plate of Dal-Chawal in between us. Suddenly, I realized that they didn’t give us any spoons. I didn’t know how to eat rice with my hands. Eating rice with hands was against my family’s rule. Whereas, Shravan always preferred eating rice with his hands so I tried imitating him. But, as I moved my thumb, the pain from my wrist became prominent. 

Shravan looked up when he saw me flinch. He looked away as if he was trying to recall something. Did he still remember that I always used spoons to eat? He smiled, “Do you want me to help you? If it’s okay with you?” I hesitantly nodded. He took some rice in his hand and brought it up to my mouth. 

He kept feeding me and I realized he wasn’t eating. “Shravan, why aren’t you eating? A minute ago, you said you were starving”.

He smiled, “It’s okay, you eat first. Then, I’ll eat”. I held his hand and turned it towards his mouth to make him eat too. Knowing Shravan, he would feed me the whole plate and sleep hungry himself. He has changed so much. Sometimes I wish he was still the same, young mischievous boy who was full of life and lived only for himself. 

It bothered me that Shravan didn’t have any hate towards me. I took a deep breath and asked, “You have the chance. You won’t ask me any questions? Demand an explanation?” He gave me a broken smile and shook his head. I sighed frustratedly, “Why did you become like this?”

He smiled, “We’re meeting after a long time and don’t know when we’ll meet again. Can’t we just make the most of this moment and leave with happy memories?” I felt a lump in my throat and my tears were threatening to spill out. I got up and told him that I wasn’t hungry anymore. 

We were tired but we looked awkwardly at each other as there was only one bed which was tiny. Shravan proposed that I would sleep on the bed while he slept on the ground. I looked angrily at him, “No! It’s so cold, you’ll get sick”. Then, I got an idea so I pushed the bed against the wall. “Look, now it’s like a sofa. You can sleep sitting up, right?” 

As we sat down, Shravan said, “Actually, I do have a question. Are you happy with Anish? Earlier, he left from the operation even though your life was in danger...as if he didn’t even-”

I finished the sentence for him, “As if he didn’t even care? That’s the truth. He was probably wishing that something happened to me so he would get the custody of our son and not have to pay alimony”. Shravan’s face grew confused. I sighed, “Anish and I are getting a divorce. We never agreed on anything and he expected me to make all the sacrifices. Then, I found out about his affair with Devika. Instead of admitting, he had the audacity to accuse me and say that our son, Sagar was your-” I paused realizing what I almost said. 

Shravan looked at me with shock, “Sagar? Is that your son’s name?” I had a flashback of the wedding when Shravan and I sat in the gazebo planning our future together. Shravan proposed that if we had a son, we would name him Sagar but I didn’t like that name. I named my son Sagar because I wanted a part of Shravan to stay with me forever. Shravan chuckled, “So, you ended up liking that old-fashioned name after all?” I didn’t have the courage to look into his painful eyes.

He nudged me, “Do you have a picture of Sagar? How old is he?” I looked confusedly at him. He genuinely looked happy and interested. 

I always kept a picture of my son with me so I showed it to Shravan. I whispered, “He’s turning one soon. But, I’ll miss his first birthday”. 

Shravan looked at Sagar’s picture fondly and said, “He’s a splitting image of you. He has the same little nose. But, he has chubbier cheeks. Well, you were pretty chubby in your baby picture with the white dress. Remember I used to tease you and call you a marshmallow? You would get so-” 

He looked up and realized that I was crying. I tried hard to hold back my tears but the irony of the situation broke my heart. Shravan wanted to name our son, Sagar but instead I gave that name to my son whose father was Anish. Yet, Shravan had fallen in love with just the picture of my son. Only in a few seconds, Shravan showed more affection towards Sagar than Anish ever did.

I wiped my tears and said, “I know you won’t ask your questions, Shravan. But, you deserve to have your answers”. I told him that I married Anish because it was Daadu’s last wish and that he would never approve of me marrying Shravan as he was Devraj uncle’s son. But, Daadu was really proud of the person he became. Shravan’s eyes teared up when he realized that Daadu had passed away. I waited so long for Shravan to come back from Kashmir and I was in shock as I hadn’t imagined us to reunite in that way. Shravan listened quietly and nodded when I asked if I had answered all his questions. There was an awkward silence before I said, “I know there is no good excuse for what I did to you. Forgive me, if you can”. 

He softly smiled, “You didn’t do anything wrong so why are you asking for forgiveness?” 

I stared at him in wonder. It seems that I still haven’t understood the depth of Shravan’s love. I slowly asked, “How has your life been? Is there...someone?” 

He fidgeted with the ends of his kurta and answered, “Yeah, I got engaged to Naina two months ago. I finally gave in to mom’s wishes”. 

My heart sank but I was happy that he was moving forward in life. I forced a smile and said, “Dr. Naina from Ladakh, right? She’s pretty and intelligent...seems nice too. I’m happy for you. When’s the wedding?” Shravan shrugged his shoulders as if he didn’t care. We sat an arm distance apart in silence. So much had changed and I felt like there was a wall between us now. Slowly, I drifted off to sleep. 

I jolted out of my sleep as the loud thunder boomed. I looked down and saw a shawl around me. Shravan must have covered me so I don’t get cold. I looked over at him to see him asleep but his head kept falling forward. I hesitantly moved closer to him. When our arms were touched, my skin set on fire...he still had the same effect on me. I gently took his head and rested it on my shoulder. I couldn’t help but smile at how innocent he looked. He nuzzled into my neck and interlocked his fingers with mine in his sleep. The thunder clapped again but Shravan was deep asleep. It was as if he hadn’t slept for years. Creases appeared on his forehead as he stirred in his sleep and clutched my hand. Was he having a bad dream? I gently stroked his hair and he relaxed. Tears rolled down my face as I asked myself that what if two years ago, I had listened to my heart? Shravan and I were so near yet so far from each other.

The next day we went back to our base and studied files related to kidnappings in the area. Shravan brought me tea while he sipped on his black coffee. I took a sip of the tea and smiled to myself. He still remembered the exact amount of sugar I put in my tea. We were discussing the case when suddenly Anish barged into the office. He smirked, “Back already?” Shravan and I looked confused as to what he was talking about. Our eyes widened when he said, “Was last night more passionate than the one in Ladakh?” Shravan fisted his hand and I gently held his wrist calming him down. People stared at us and started whispering. 

I rolled my eyes, “Just shut up, Anish. You’re disgusting”. I was used to his cheap words but I didn’t think he would fall so low that he would try to humiliate us. 

Anish kept glancing at Shravan as he spoke to me, “I think you forgot that our divorce is yet to be finalized. You’re still my wife”. Shravan clenched his jaw. I realized that Anish was trying to provoke Shravan by insulting me. Anish smirked and glanced at Shravan again. “I thought Ladakh was a rumor but now...I would have never married you if I knew you-” Before Anish could finish his sentence, Shravan grabbed Anish’s collar and repeatedly punched his face. I tried to pull Shravan away but he was too strong. 

Anish’s face was covered in blood. I used all my strength to push Shravan and stood in between them. I became frightened seeing the rage in Shravan’s eyes. I held Shravan’s face and said, “Calm down, Shravan! Stop it!” I turned to Anish and said, “Leave...before he kills you”. Anish’s eyes were full of fear as he ran out. 

Shravan angrily ripped my hands off his face and shook my shoulders. “How can you let him talk to you like that?”

I handed him some water to drink but he moved my hand away. I sighed, “I’m used to Anish’s cheap mentality...that’s why I’m leaving him. His filthy words say more about him than it does about us. But right now, he was trying to provoke you. He wanted a reaction and you gave him that!” 

Shravan scoffed, “Well, then what am I supposed to do? I can’t just sit there quietly while someone insults you”. 

I realized that people were still staring at us and gossiping. I gently held Shravan’s shoulders and whispered, “Please, calm down. We’ll work on the case tomorrow. Get some sleep and forget this ever happened”. I pushed the glass of water towards him and left. 

The next day, Shravan, Anish, and I were called down to the Colonel’s office. Anish yelled, “This man fractured my nose. He is completely mad”. Shravan rolled his eyes. 

The Colonel held up his hand to silence Anish. “I’ve worked with Major Shravan for years. He is a very calm person. You must have done something wrong that he beat you like that”. 

The Colonel motioned Shravan to speak. Shravan spoke firmly, “Sir, Captain Anish spoke about Major Suman in a very disrespectful manner and I cannot tolerate such behavior in my team”. 

The Colonel sighed and said, “Major Shravan, you had the authority to suspend him for such behavior but instead you physically assaulted him”. Anish smirked at Shravan. The Colonel glared at Anish and said, “Don’t think that I am disagreeing with Major Shravan. You deserved to have your nose broken for talking about a woman that way. I don’t care if she’s your wife or that you’re getting a divorce. She’s here as an Army officer who is your senior. Don’t mix your personal and professional lives”. The Colonel looked at me and asked for my statement. He sighed and said, “Both, Captain Anish and Major Shravan, are suspended immediately for two months. Major Suman Tiwari will take over as commanding officer”. 

As we walked out of the office, Anish turned to Shravan and said, “You will pay for this”. 

Shravan smirked, “Pay for what? Your broken nose’s surgery? You deserved to have more of your bones broken...I’ll pay for your treatment for those too”. 

An hour later, Anish walked into my cabin and said, “Now, I will make sure that you suffer. I know that Sagar and Shravan are your biggest weaknesses and hurting them will give you the most pain”. 

I scoffed, “Haven’t you embarrassed yourself enough? As for Sagar, I will get his custody because you don’t even care about him. If anyone compares our records, it’s clear who will get custody. As for Shravan, you can’t do anything to him. You saw what he was capable of doing to you last night”.

I turned away and Anish spoke, “I will make sure that Shravan is insulted and thrown out of the army. I have my ways...my contacts”. 

I clenched my fist and said, “If you even think about doing that, I will report all your crimes to the army. I know all the misdeed you tried to hide. Imagine what will happen to you. Shravan doesn’t need to be afraid of anything...he’s an honest and hard-working man unlike you”. 

Anish sighed, “You know, I must ask since I don’t know if I’ll have the chance again. What is so special about that Shravan anyways?” 

I smirked, “Are you really this stupid? You still have the audacity to ask that question? You’re not even half the man he is. You’re not even worthy of being compared to him”. 

Anish’s smile faded and anger took over. He snidely replied, “You made such a big deal out of my affair with Devika. How is your and Shravan’s relationship any different?”

I clenched my jaw and grabbed his collar. “Don’t you dare compare your filthy relationship with what Shravan and I have...you will never understand it therefore I’m not going to waste my time explaining it to you. Now, Leave...I have work to do”. 

Another hour later, I was immersed in my work when I heard a knock on my door again. I groaned in frustration. This Anish never gets tired of being insulted. I barked, “What do you want now?”

The door cracked open and Shravan peeked his head in. He asked with an amused smile, “Uhh...should I come back later?” 

I stuttered, “Uh no, sorry...you’re fine. Come in. I thought it was...go ahead…” 

He set some files on my desk and said, “I’m leaving soon so I’ll just update you on everything I had been working on since you are the commanding officer now”. I watched him intently as he was talking but the truth was I wasn’t listening to a single word he was saying. I just wanted to hold onto this moment because I didn’t know when I’d see him again. He finished talking and said, “And that’s all! I don’t think I’m forgetting anything”. 

I looked into his eyes and said, “Are you sure? Is that all you came to say?” 

His face softened, “Well no...First, congratulations on becoming the commanding officer. You will do great. Second, take care of yourself and be safe. Third...when you call Sagar, tell him I said Happy Birthday”. 

My eyes teared up and I couldn’t stop myself from pulling him into a tight hug. I was tired of this. I was tired of meeting him only to be separated once again. He didn’t hug me back and stood there silently. My tears seeped through his uniform and he smoothed my hair. He sighed, “Goodbye...take care of yourself, Sumo”. He took my hand off that was clutching into his uniform. 

He turned to leave and I caught his hand. I said with a broken voice, “Take care of yourself too. I know you don’t sleep so stop doing that or you’ll get sick”. He was turned away from me but he nodded his head. Was he hiding his own tears? I reluctantly let go of his hand and he left. I slid down my desk and rested my head on my knees trying to suppress my cries. I whispered to myself, “As always, I’ll miss you, Shravan…”