Restart- 2

There are time when explanations, no matter how reasonable, just don’t seem to help.

The stiff fingers held onto the metallic gun as bullets were put into it one after one, slowly.

The TV in the background trashed his character mercilessly as panelists screamed at each other, and inside the dimly lit house, Rakesh Chaurasia stared into the weapon in his hand, zoned out in his own world. He has aged years during this whole week, the few grey hairs have now become patches. The empty house just added into the overall misery of the situation.

Once all the bullets were put, he unlocked the catch and put the gun inside his mouth.

Rahane impatiently looked at his wrist watch for the umpteeth time, exhaling in frustration. His mind knew the time set jointly by him and ETF Director was still a few good minutes ahead, but he wanted to be done with this issue at once, lock it neatly in a closet and turn his back on, never to see again. He looked better today after a few hours well rested sleep and coffee, but now the awful smell of disinfectant and local phenyl was making his earlier headache come back. Wrinkling his nose, he looked at his watch again, frowning at the slow going time, and exhaled in frustration.

Heaven had mercy on him and in that exact time, the ETF officers entered, their footsteps echoing in the hallway of the morgue.

”Agent.” Aisha gave the man a nod, and he looked at the ACP who was quiet, unusually, and did not even meet his eyes. This was a difficult situation, he knew, but he didn’t want to delay anymore. Without wasting any time, he summoned a staff and the trio headed towards the morgue room.

The moment the drawer was pulled out and white sheet was removed, the Director let out a disgusted “Shit!”. Even Rahane had to look away- the face was badly damaged due to the acid and even without the preserver, one can see the body was slowly rotting away. Turning side ways, he saw the ACP staring intently at the body, then took a few step towards it. Her fingers brushed over the body’s fingertips ever so softly, barely touching, and then she jolted backwards, as if a live wire has passed.

Maybe she ]also realized that it was the end.

The Director made a noise from the back of her throat and the staff cover the body and closed the drawer. Once outside, she took a deep breath, in and out, trying not to throw up.

“So,” The agent started, “what do you think?” His question was mostly directed towards the Director as seeing the still form of ACP, Rahane realized expecting anything from her will be futile. The Director took a few moments before answering, choosing her words carefully.

“The body’s height, it’s similar to him. He and Ri were of same heights.” She motioned to the other woman, “The build looks similar too, as far as I can remember from years ago. Apart from then . . .” She paused, remembering something, “Didn’t you mention you did a DNA test?”

He nodded, “The prints were taken from samples taken years later, and supplied by . . . “ He gestured at the ACP, “I understand how futile this exercise might be, especially with the ruined facial structure. But thank you for coming anyway. I think this was the confirmation I needed. Neel Sahaay is . . . “

“It’s not him.” Riya spoke at the exact same time, cutting him off and the duo stared at her. Shaking off whatever zone she was all these while, she repeated loudly, “It’s not him.”

“And why is that?” Rahane took a step towards her. She said nothing- it was a gut feeling, but their work don’t allow for gut feeling. Especially Rahane, he won’t understand.

“Why do you think so?” Aisha asked softly, equally puzzled. Riya glanced at her, but again said nothing.

“I personally matched his prints. I went through everything. The killings stopped.” The Agent was frustrated at the situation as his voice got louder, “And you say . . .”

“You called us to identify the body? I just did.” She replied, matching his tone, “It’s not him. That’s the answer you are getting. Take it or leave it.”

He glared at her hard, and the Director intervened, “Is there anyway to double check?”

“This was the double check.” Rahane replied, without taking his eyes off the ACP. Taking a few steps back, he ran his fingers through hair. For a few minutes everyone was silent, the anticipation making the atmosphere heavy. Then he looked up to meet her gaze.

“You know what? I pray you are right. I hope you are proven right, because within the next couple of days, we will lose Haqqani. So you have exactly 7 days to be right. Or else it was all for nothing.” Glancing at the Director, he walked away hastily, his boot echoing in the hallway.

Rahane’s words were playing in her head when Riya walked into the ETF forensic lab, finding her team mates already circling the body of the teenager, Richa. Liza had found something, her excited voice rang in the room and the ACP tried to focus on her voice fully just as she stepped into vicinity, completely forgetting the place- beside her boss, ACP Rawte.

”So I checked the wounds on her head and there was something interesting.” The Doctor turned to Riya, determination on her face, “I was actually waiting for you.”

“Okay?” She drawled, and everyone was as puzzled as her. Liza had planned something and she wanted to show.

“Assume you trying to hit someone. Take Arjun sir, for example.” It was then she noticed she was standing beside him and unintentionally took a step back, shocked, “Sir, if you are okay?”

Dumbfounded at the situation he was put into, he could only nod. Riya thought about bolting with an excuse, but one look at the team mates and she realized she was trapped as well. Squaring her shoulders, she stood near him once again, turning her frame towards him. He gave a nod and she raised her hand, not really threatening or with force, but was caught surprised when he grabbed her arm to stop the upcoming assault, jerking her petite frame towards him.

The eyes held onto each other but the stubborn people did not let out anything.

“Now,” Liza’s voice broke their small moment as she stood near them, “Riya is lefty, so when she raised hand to strike the spot should be here.” She pointed towards Arjun’s shoulder, “Or areas similar to this side. For a right person, the spot will be different.”

“I guess you are trying to say Richa was murdered by someone lefty?” Sameer said, and the Doctor nodded enthusiastically.

“Exactly.”

“But Rakesh . . . “ Riya said just as Arjun let go of her wrist slowly, her words unfinished, and Chotu continued her sentence.

“is right handed. That means . . .”

“he did not kill her.” Shree finished for all, and all eyes were on the body of the teenager.

Then who was the killer?

Aisha had insisted on staying with Chaurasia until the rest of team figures out the real killer, hence Chotu and ACP Mukherjee headed towards the lawyer’s house until this is solved. Thanks to the tough security, reporters maintained a good distance from the place, but the moment two officers from ETF came out of the SUV, they went berserk. Chotu made way for the woman to go first, and Riya gave a disgusted look at the circus, turned her head and briskly walked inside.

The moment their feet landed, a bad feeling crept in. The house was unbearably silent, the noise outside dulled in here. The duo shared a look, kept their hold on their guns, just in case. There were no housestaffs in, they were dismissed the moment news came out of the murder, and it fell upon the two to search the big house to look for the distraught man. After looking rooms after room they stood in front of the study, and Riya slowly pushed the unlocked door open, beside her Chotu trying to control his panting.

“Oh damn.” He whispered just as she took a step inside. Rakesh had put his gun inside his mouth, eyes closed, ready to pull the trigger. Hearing them, his eyes snapped open, a look of panic setting in. The gun was then pointed towards them. Chotu wasted no time to pull out his own, standing beside the ACP who was standing still, staring at the lawyer.

“Rakesh, put the gun down.” He said. Riya noticed the lawyer’s hands were not shaking- he was determined to do this. She glanced sideways at her partner, who was sweating at this moment.

“Why?” The lawyer asked simply, his voice hollow, “What do I have to live for?”

“Your family.” The ACP spoke for the first time. The former raised an eyebrow sardonically.

“Do you see anyone in the house?” At their silence he continued, “Everyone left me. And who can blame them? Who will side with the child molester, the murderer?”

“That’s not true.” Chotu spoke this time, “You are innocent. We know this, we can prove it.”

“It will solve nothing.” He shook head, tears filling his eyes, “Nothing. They have already decided.” He pointed towards outside with a gun, then shouted, “They have decided the killer! Me! Everything is over! My reputation, my life, my career, everything! Who will care if I am proved innocent? Who will even watch the news then? None. Not a single soul. Nobody will care. So better . . . “ He pressed the gun to his simple, determined, “it’s better.”

“Don’t you want to see it through? Don’t you want justice?”

“THERE IS NO JUSTICE!” The lawyer roared, making the other two jump. His chest heaved as he ranted, “Justice? Where the f u c k is justice? She is dead, and my life is over! Don’t even talk about justice.” He sobbed this time, the hand holding the gun falling sideways. Immediately, Chotu went ahead and took it away, making the broken man sit on a chair.

Riya took the gun from his hand and stared at till the whole night.

There were times when she would sit in her apartment, or her hotel, put bullets one after another inside her gun, roll them and put it on her head. Her finger would be on the trigger, but never she pressed on it. Even back then when it felt like everything was over, she never wanted to fall over the edge. She had a reason, a purpose. After Raghu sir told her to come back, she realized people did care about her, so talking how she is all alone and nobody will be effected if something happens to her is selfish. The closest she came to hurting herself when she found out Neel is possibly a cyber terrorist. She took all of his things, put it in a bag, spilled petrol all over it and lit a matchstick. When a trail of fire nearly caught her shoes, she did not immediately stepped away, as if daring the destiny to swallow her.

Destiny let her live.

She understands Rakesh. She sees a lot of similarity in him, and then realizes she is in a better position than he ever would be and while he can never recover, career wise at least, there were a lot of people who have backed her up in her IPS career and will continue to do so out of their sheer goodwill. On the personal front, she has her Grandmother and now Aisha, and that is good enough. If Neel is really dead this time, she will be free. Truly free.

And yet, she found herself with Rakesh’s gun, sitting inside locker room in ETF, staring at it.

“What are you doing?” Aisha’s shocked voice startled her to look up, as the former took a cautious step in. Riya frowned, then looked at the gun in her hand.

“It’s Rakesh’s.”

“Give it to me.” Aisha outstretched her hand.

“It’s empty.” She showed her the bullets on the other palm.

“Now.” The Director was adamant. Sighing, she handed over it to her. Aisha counted the bullets, put them inside the gun and kept her hold on it as she sat beside the ACP on the bench.

“I heard about Rakesh.” She started, “I have arranged someone to stay with him 247. I have also told Sameer to get in touch with someone from his family.”

“Nobody will care.” ACP Mukherjee replied, “He did have a point, you know? When you have nothing to live for, why live?”

The Director was speechless, staring at the woman as if seeing her for the first time, “Because, life is precious. Too small to live in past, to let the past rule.”

“Life as he knows it is gone, Aisha.”

“So he will build a new life.” She added forcefully, “It will be hard, it will be painful, but he will. You know why? Because innocent people deserves to live. And when you try, doors open. It might be God,” At Riya’s look, she sighed exasperatedly, “or sheer willpower. Giving up is never an option. It will hurt you, and people near you. And people do care, you just don’t see it.”

The ACP met her eyes, frowning, “I was not talking about me.”

“I did not say we were.” The Director replied, her face smooth. The two women stared at each other until a staff knocked on the door, informing them about Richa’s family’s arrival.

The interrogation of the Uncle and Mother went like last time- the Uncle hysterical and on edge, the Mother catatonic and silent. ACP Rawte looked irritated at the futile exercise, but one look from the Director made him school his features. They all decided to take a break and made a group outside the interrogation room.

“This feels useless.” Sameer spoke what everyone had on their minds.

“But we have no choice.” Arjun ran a hand through his hair, “There is no other way to find out what happened that night. Not a single soul has seen something, no evidence, nothing.”

“Seperate the two.” Riya suggested, and at others look clarified, “Maybe the Mother knows something. Until the Uncle stops shouting, we can’t get anything.”

“Riya, the woman has not spoken the moment she has set foot inside.” Sameer sounded skeptical. The former shrugged, saying nothing, and The Director and Arjun shared a look.

“Okay, let’s seperate the two.”

Like Sameer thought, Sunaina was as unresponsive as a corpse, stared into nothing and did not seem like heard any questions from the ETF members. The Uncle’s booming voice can be heard from all the way down to the interrogation room, and Arjun winced thinking how Shree was handling the man. Aisha cursed under her breath, irritated, then signaled Sameer. The duo left the room and in no time the Uncle’s voice stopped.

Arjun almost held her hand back when Riya took out Richa’s pictures from morgue, laying them open on the table and calmly sat back, observing the Mother. Bit by bit, the horrific images went through Sunaina as her body started to shake. The Boss raised his hand to move the photos, but Riya held onto him sharply. The faster she did it, the quicker she removed the hold, as if the touch burnt her.

“Rakesh did not do it, Sunaina.” Riya spoke quietly, “But you already know it, don’t you?”

The Mother looked up slowly, panic setting in. Her mouth opened and closed many times, but no words came out.

“Which one of you did it? You, or your Brother?” At her movement Riya continued, “You? You killed her?”

Sunaina looked down again, and besides Riya, Arjun glanced at her sideways, shocked at the turn of events. Did she always suspect her? Why she did not say it? The idea that she held back because of their spat bothered him but he filed it away for a later time.

“Why?” He asked. Sunaina burst into tears at the question, finally letting out her grief and rage at the situation. The tale she told was twisted and horrifying- how Richa hated Rakesh, and made up the allegation about him. How Sunaina kicked him out, how her Brother roughed up Rakesh. How months later, Richa was boasting about it to her friends and Sunaina overheard, and the anger took over. How can she do it, her flesh and blood? Did she have no right to move on, be happy, love someone? When did she become this monster, when did she create this monster? The verbal fight escalated to physical one in no time, and in her state she hit her head over and over again until it was a mangled lump. Once rage subsided, she realized what she had done to her own child, and immediately called her Brother. The rest was handled by him.

The siblings were taken into custody as the team spoke with each other about the case. Riya kept looking at the duo, but all she could hear was Rakesh’s words- there is no justice. Sure, it will be reported in the media and there will be weeks of headlines after this, but his life is ruined. Nothing they do can bring it back.

She was almost moving away when Aisha called her out, “Hey,” The Director seemed hesitant, but made up her mind almost immediately.

“You ever need someone to talk to, remember me.”

The former smiled, “Even if it’s 4am?”

“Especially if it’s 4am.”

The women smiled at each other, and Riya gave her a mock salute, now ready to leave finally.

+++++++++++++=

Arjun hesitated before entering the conference room, eyeing the woman inside who was gathering papers and putting them neatly in a file. Even though Madam Director always complains how Riya is always late to submit paperwork and he himself had witnessed how she loathes it, she was always meticulous in collecting the data and keeping it together. Just like how she wipes her mug before drinking coffee (even though its always thrown away if it’s not McD), she always cleans the place where she works, leaving it as if she never touched it before.

He knocked and she looked up, surprised and slightly guarded. Giving a small nod, he entered.

The silence stretched on as both kept quiet, Riya barely met his eyes and focused more on the papers on her hand and Arjun did not know what to say. He hated this- this uncomfortable silence between the two of them. They had fought bitterly earlier but there was always a charge, a spark. Now there is nothing but regret.

“You did good, back there.” She looked up at the compliment and gave a quick nod. “I wanted to know,” He took a step near her and she looked up again in question, “Did you always doubt the Mother?”

She thought before speaking, and he wondered when was the last time she did that. Thinking and filtering words before saying them out loud. Is she doing that to everyone or it’s just for him?

“I had a gut feeling.”

“Then why you did not say it before?” He asked, impatient. She thought again before speaking and he almost burst out- don’t do that, damnit! Speak up your mind!

“Evidence is needed before pointing fingers.” She replied slowly, then looked at him squarely, “When you don’t do that, you make mistakes.”

His heart sank and he opened his mouth to ask but she beat him to that, “Besides, it all worked out in the end. Thank you for the compliment.”

“That is not the point.”

“Then what is?”

“That you don’t have to filter out your thoughts just because we . . . “ He stopped just as she stiffened. Taking a deep breath, Arjun started again, “We are at work. We share theories and look at all angles. I would urge you to share, don’t hold back.”

Riya gave a bitter smirk at that. Life had taught her a valuable lesson for being unfiltered and not thinking before acting, and now probably is the time she put that lesson in use. But she was not going to tell him that. If this is the peace offering he is giving, she will gladly accept it. She was the one who hurt him and she should have reached out first, but then he was the better man.

She nodded, “Ok, Sir.” Finally done with her work, she gave him a small smile to which he nodded, gathered her stuff and walked out of the room.

Arjun’s eyes followed her till she vanished inside the elevator, fists clenched at the helpless situation he was stuck at. There was no moving forward, no going back. This limbo seemed to stretch on forever, and no matter how much he tried justifying this talk to make their professional lives easier, he knew he hoped for something from her side. Maybe she will make a wisecrack comment, and he would helplessly smile at that, and things will go before it was- before she told him horrible things and he unknowingly slipped his deepest, darkest desire in front of her. But nothing happened and he was disappointed, again, and he had none to blame but himself.

And to think hope had no place when it concerned her . . .

Director Aisha Kapoor has bad days, and most bad days starts with a 3am phone call. This time, she would not pick up as her partner would beat her to it, greet the other person with a sleepy and grouchy ‘Hello’ as she snuggled into pillow, mentally preparing to move from the bed.

The phone was immediately given to her and she frowned, “Aisha Kapoor here.”

“I need off.” It was Riya. The former glanced at Sameer’s embarrassed face and held back a smile, worried at the untimely phone call. Also the fact that Riya will let go of this moment to tease her about another man taking her calls.

“What’s wrong?”

There was silence in response for a few moment and Aisha almost gave up on getting any answers, but ACP RIya Mukherjee was full of surprises these days, “Grandma is in hospital.”

“Oh my God.” She sat up immediately, “What happened?”

“I am not sure.” She gritted her teeth, then exhaled, “Two days, max. I will be back if my presence is needed beforehand.”

“Just go.” The Director ordered, signaling Sameer to hold on who was concerned as well, “Did you book a flight?”

“Yes. I am heading out.”

“Drive safe.” Mentally picturing the monstrosity of a car, she bid goodbye and turned to her partner to fill him in. He went to sleep after a while, but she looked up at the ceiling, feeling the sun rising outside as the clock chimed for them to get up.

Once in the office, all hell broke loose.

Rakesh Chaurasia had committed suicide, after killing two reporters in his mansion.

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