Chapter 15

Chapter 15: A True Apology?

"Chote?" Arnav was about to leave when Anjali arrived in the hall.

"Yes, Di?" He asked.

"I know you have already told us that whatever is going on between you two is personal. But I want to know that why were you standing before the guest room early in the morning?" Anjali asked making everyone look at Arnav in surprise, including Khushi.

Arnav avoided looking at Khushi.

"Khushiji? At least I expect an answer from you. What is going on with you two?" Anjali turned her eyes to already surprised Khushi who was looking at Arnav with disbelieving eyes.

"You don't have to ask Khushi, Di. I was standing there because I wanted to. That is it and now I am getting late for my meeting. Bye." He replied and left leaving behind astonished faces of his family.

"Khushiji? Do you care to explain? If there is a problem, you can share with us. Maybe I can help" Anjali offered in her usual soothing voice mixed with worry.

"I am sorry, Di but I think it's Arnavji who needs to answer these questions. I can't" Khushi replied and left too.

"I am sure this house is going crazy" murmured Anjali and Akash looked sympathetically at her.

"How's, Jeejaji di?" He asked as Anjali started to pour some juice in a glass.

"He's better, Akash, yet I am not letting him move out of the room. I want him to recover fully before he once again goes back to his busy schedules" Anjali replied and Akash nodded to it.

~~***~~

The day was passing in a jiffy and since Arnav wasn't at home, Khushi decided to visit his room, their room.

She walked in and the homely feeling hit her hard. It was so relieving to be in this room. She had memories in this room, in the poolside next to it.

Living in another room was similar to living out of Raizada mansion. The room smelt of him, a scent which always drugged her senses.

"I wish I could live here" She murmured softly, caressing the material of the recliner. It smelled like him.

As she walked around the room, her eyes fell on the strips of medicines lying unattended on the side table.

Tension broke loose in her body as she realized that the strip wasn't used. She remembered well that the new strips had been delivered yesterday and it was clearly evident that it hadn't been used since then.

Has he been skipping his medicines?

No! How can he? Khushi thought in worry.

~~***~~

"Akash, get that Malhotra project file to me" Arnav said in the intercom and once disconnected, threw his head back in the chair he was sitting in.

He could feel the world getting dizzier and dizzier with each passing second. His head was spinning badly and it was like drums were beating inside his head.

"Bhai, here is the file" Akash said, getting in his cabin but earned no response from him.

"Bhai?" Akash repeated, this time louder and Arnav straightened himself in the chair.

"Oh, Akash? You brought the file?" He asked, looking at his brother.

"I did. Here it is, Bhai" Akash said, handing him the file.

"Bhai, we have a meeting in next ten minutes" Akash informed as Arnav immersed himself in the file.

"Meeting?" Arnav asked, looking up.

"Yeah, it was scheduled this evening but Mr. Singh had some issues and he was insisting upon rescheduling the timings. So it's been fixed ten mins later. Aman must have sent you the mail this morning" Akash stated.

"Oh. He might have. I didn't check" Arnav replied drudgingly and got up.

"Let's leave for the conference room then" He said and had hardly walked two steps when his steps faltered and Akash rushed to support him.

"Bhai, are you okay?" Akash asked in surprise.

Arnav pulled his arm out of Akash's grip.

"Yes, I am fine, Akash. I'll have a coffee after the meeting and I'll be okay. Come on, let's move now" Arnav said and steadying his balance walked out towards the conference room.

~~***~~

"Mr. Singh I think you need to update your knowledge regarding AR's policies. Quality is something AR will never compromise with. So, we would recommend you to..." Arnav was explaining when he stopped abruptly.

The conference was more like a personal meeting and there were just four members seated in the room.

Arnav, Akash, Aman and the client. As Arnav stopped midway, the rest three people looked up at him with increased attention, waiting for him to continue.

Arnav, on the other hand was struggling with the surging emotions which had just risen inside him as he sensed lavender scent mixing in the air.

Khushi was here. He knew.

"Bhai?" Akash asked, in a way asking him to go on.

"Yeah, so as I was saying, Mr. Singh, AR has always.." Arnav reluctantly started again but was cut in by the loud noise of opening the door as Khushi barged in.

She looked nowhere but hurried directly to him, her face red in anger.

"What the hell you think you are doing, Arnavji?" She shouted on top her lungs, shocking the rest three occupants of the room, whom she had clearly missed noticing.

For now, all her attention and anger was directed at the man before her who was watching her meticulously.

"Khushi, calm down" Arnav stated in a calm voice.

"You expect me to calm down after all the nonsense you have been doing? First, you stood whole night before my room and now this is what you do?" She screamed again, unaware that the rest three members in the room were watching them with their mouths hanging open.

Arnav Singh Raizada was being shouted upon and he still seemed relaxed. This was indeed something any outsider could never dream of including Aman.

"Khushi, I am in a meeting. Let's discuss this later" Arnav said in the same calm voice and gestured her to turn back.

That seemed to put some logic in Khushi's brain and she turned back to face three equally surprised faces as hers.

Realisation hit her and she realised that she had just barged inside the conference room and had screamed at Arnav, that too in the presence of three people.

"I am sorry" she muttered to the three and turned her attention back to Arnav.

"But we need to talk right NOW" She said in a persuasive tone and Arnav had to smile.

She cares about him. Still cares!

"Khushi, please it's going to take two more minutes. You can wait in my cabin" Arnav asked her politely.

"I am NOT waiting for a single second" Khushi replied, not ready to budge.

"Mr. Raizada, I think we can resume the conference after your meeting with Jalebi Express" Mr. Singh's amused voice sounded in the room, once again surprising the rest four occupants of the room.

While Arnav wondered if he had heard it right, Khushi took a sharp turn towards Mr. Singh and then followed a bizarre turn of events for Arnav.

Khushi surprisingly screamed out "Abhay" and the supposed Abhay laughed merrily.

It later turned out that Abhay Singh was a good friend of Khushi from Lucknow. Khushi and Abhay had been neighbours for a long time before Abhay had left Lucknow five years back to establish his own business in Mumbai with the help of his uncle. After five years, both of them were reuniting today in Arnav Singh Raizada's conference room.

As can be guessed, Arnav learnt all of this quite later, after Khushi had hugged the man right before his eyes. Then, she excused herself from the friend stating that she needed to talk to her husband for a few minutes.

With that, Arnav and Khushi walked back to Arnav's cabin.

Entering the cabin, Arnav turned to face Khushi, and found her angry mood restored. She was no longer smiling. Great!

"What do you want to talk about, Khushi?" Arnav asked and slowly and carefully walked to his chair and sat in it. He couldn't let her know that his head was heavy and spinning.

"Why didn't you take your medicines?" She asked him looking straight in his eyes, determined to have her answer.

"I forgot" He replied, looking away from her angry eyes.

"Forgot? How convenient, Arnavji! A man who has never forgotten to take his medicines before, suddenly forgets about them?" Khushi asked, further enraged at his lie. Did he think she was a fool?

She watched him remain silent and her irritation grew further.

"Tell me, Arnavji! Why haven't you been taking your medicines?" She demanded again.

"Because they are useless! Do you hear me? Those medicines are useless! They don't heal the pain I feel all the time. They don't lessen the permanent ache inside my heart. Those medicines don't make you talk to me, look at me. They don't lessen your hate towards me. So, what's the point of them? They are good for nothing. So, I stopped having them" He said the words in one breath and then clenched his fists to overcome the dizziness which was once again building up in his head. In the meanwhile, Khushi stood stunned at his reply.

After taking a deep breath, Arnav looked at her silent form.

"I am sorry, Khushi. I didn't mean to say it this way. It sounded all wrong. I am not tying to gain your sympathy or make you feel guilty. I know I deserve all of it. It's my mistake. I am sorry, very sorry. And I also know my being sorry isn't enough. You're hurt, you're heartbroken. My.." He stopped abruptly and once again, threw his head back on the chair, closing his eyes.

"Arnavji? What happened? Are you okay?" Seeing his condition, Khushi rushed to his side, the tears streaming down which she had been holding ever since he started speaking.

"I..am okay" He said, opening his eyes to read the concern in her eyes.

"No you aren't. You haven't had your medicines since yesterday. You didn't even have your breakfast properly" She said, shutting him up and making him stare at her.

"Now sit here and do not make a move" she instructed him in her authority laden voice and rushed to the small seating area in the cabin, where lay a couch and a center table.

Arnav opened his eyes properly and noticed her opening a lunch box, which she had probably brought with herself.

She served the food in a plate and placing it on the table, walked back to him.

"Come with me" she said, helping him out of the chair and guiding towards the couch.

"Food?" He asked, looking at her.

"I brought this with me. But when I didn't find you in your cabin, I placed this here and walked to the conference room" She explained.

"Now eat this, Arnavji" She said, breaking a piece from the chapatti and dipping it in the curry.

Seeing the love and concern on her face, Arnav's heart filled up with warmth and he opened his mouth, taking the bite and chewing on it.

"You made it?" He asked, after three bites and now it was Khushi's turn to feel the same warmth spreading up in her heart.

"How do you know?" She asked.

"It tastes like you" He replied, his eyes now glinting back.

"What?" she asked, embarrassed and surprised.

"I mean sweet. I think in your concern and worry, mistakenly you replaced salt with sugar" He said and Khushi's lips formed a perfect 'O' in surprise.

"What? If it's sweet, it's not good for your health. Why are you eating it?" She asked and dipping another piece in the curry, tasted it herself.

"It tastes okay to me. It's salty, how come..?" She asked, once again surprised but Arnav cut in,

"Oh, I am sorry. I think then it's your fingers making it sweet" He said, holding her hand and eating the remaining bite from her fingers, his tongue lightly brushing against her fingers in the process.

A dark shade of red crept in Khushi's cheeks at the feeling.

"Arnavji, please eat your food properly" She said, withdrawing her hand and looking at the plate instead of his face.

"That's what I am doing" He said and smirked.

"Here, finish this. I'll get your medicines" She said, ignoring his last comment and placing the plate in his hands, she started fiddling in the bag she had brought.

Arnav didn't reply but continued eating.

As he was done with the food, Khushi offered him the medicines and he swallowed it with the juice.

As he was having his medicines, his words rang in Khushi's head.

"I didn't have them because they are useless. They don't heal the pain I am going through. They don't make you talk to me, look at me.They don't lessen your hate towards me. So I stopped having them"

The words again clenched her heart.

How can he think she hates him? Even after all the pain he had caused her, she couldn't hate him. She wasn't capable of hating him. Her heart knew nothing but love for him.

She wished she could tell him that, but she didn't.

"Feeling better?" She asked him once he had the medicines and he nodded in approval.

With that, silence once again set in.

"Promise me you won't ever skip your food and medicines" She asked him as they sat in silence.

The words from her made him look at her and her skin burned under that gaze.

"I can't" He replied.

"Why can't you, Arnavji? You have no right to be so careless with your health. Especially when you know how much everyone cares for you. Everyone loves you and it would hurt them to see you in such a condition" She explained desperately.

"My health, rather my life, doesn't matter Khushi, unless you're around me. I don't know how I spent so many years of my life without you, but now, I...I just can't live without you being around. Everything can go to hell if you are not with me. Nothing matters, only you do" He replied and her heart fluttered wildly.

"Don't talk nonsense, Arnavji. I am nothing. If I would have been so special for you, you would have believed me. You would have stood beside me and not against me" She replied, speaking out her doubts to him and saw him taking a deep sigh.

"People make mistakes, Khushi. I made too and I am repenting. And to answer your question that why didn't I believe you, I have my answer. I couldn't trust you because my love for you was blind. I had never been aware about the existence of the feelings within me which surge up every time you are around me. I loved you against my rules of not falling in love. And when I saw you with Shyam, it killed the rational side of me. It was just my crushed ego and hurting heart that survived. I couldn't think properly. In other words, I lost myself. I took decisions which would help me keep you with me. I was afraid, I was insecure. I wanted you with me. There could have been several ways to deal with the misunderstandings I was living in, but I chose the way which would assure your presence around me. So, I married you. I had grown selfish and I did so much harm, to you, to myself. I am truly sorry for all of it but it's not enough, is it? So, let me punish myself because you wouldn't ever punish me for what I did. This is my way of feeling better. It doesn't lessen the magnitude of my sins but it surely lessens the gravity." He went on with his feelings, his thoughts, unaware of the tears which streamed down his cheeks.

"Please, Khushi, punish me. Shout at me, scream at me, but please don't distance yourself from me. It kills me. If you want, I am ready to die. If that would make you feel better, overcome your hurt, I am ready to kill..."

"Stop it, Arnavji" Khushi screamed, covering his mouth with her palms.

"Don't you dare to talk about such things! You think I'd be able to live without you? I can't, Arnavji. So please never say such things. I understand each word you said. I truly do. But I need time. A little time to overcome everything" She spoke, her each word dipped in pain. As if it was painful for her to utter those words. Indeed it was. Watching her husband, a man she loves in such a condition was heart-wrenching for her. But time was all she needed now.

Arnav understood that. He would give her everything she wants.

"Take your time, Khushi. Take all the time you want but please come back. To our room. It haunts me at nights. My room, my life is nothing without you. Please come back" He requested and Khushi didn't have the heart to deny him.

So, she nodded, bringing a smile on Arnav's face.

"Thank you, Khushi" He said.

Khushi was taken aback as he got up and hugged her, embracing her petite frame in his strong arms. Khushi felt like she was home, with his arms wrapped around her.

It felt so good and tempting to be in his arms. She inhaled his scent and made a move to step out of the embrace. Sensing her not-so-expressed resistance, Arnav let her move out of his arms, feeling vacant.

"You still didn't promise me that you won't ever skip your food and medicines" She said, making him smile.

"I won't ever skip my medicines, Khushi. You have my word" He replied and noticed her eyes getting wet.

"I have to go now" She said.

"And I am here to drop you" Abhay's said, who had just walked in the cabin, to mention, without a knock which irked Arnav.

"Abhay? I am so sorry. We didn't talk properly there. I had something urgent to discuss with Arnavji and I..."

"Chill, Khushi. Halt your Jalebi Express!! You don't owe me explanations" Abhay said with a cheeky grin, ignoring Arnav's presence.

"Don't call me that" Khushi said, eyeing him.

"Whoa? Did you stop creating Jalebi piles? Or did you stop eating them with your express speed? If both your answers are no, then I will keep calling you Jalebi Express" Abhay said, but before Khushi could reply, Arnav cut in.

"Mr. Singh I think we need to resume our meeting. You can continue your gala time with MY wife, once we're done with the meeting" Arnav said, emphasizing the word MY.

"Oh yeah, thank you Mr. Raizada, that reminds me I didn't congratulate you two for your wedding. Congrats, Jalebi Express, Congrats Mr. Raizada" Abhay said and Arnav nodded.

"Akash told me that you two got married five months back but there are so many questions I have for Khushi to answer. She can reply to all of them on our way out. Come, Khushi, I'll drop you to your sasural" Abhay said, once again grinning.

"Mr. Singh..." Arnav started but Abhay cut him off.

"Please, Mr. Raizada now that you happen to be the husband of my Jalebi Express, I think we can use first names. At least I'd prefer you calling me Abhay. And yeah, I and the younger Mr. Raizada have discussed the terms and conditions for this contract. So, the meeting is over. I have to leave now. It was nice meeting you" Abhay said, all in one breath and Arnav heard Khushi chuckling after months.

It had been months since he had seen Khushi laugh this way. He had indeed missed her laughs.

"I'll go with Abhay then. And please do not over load yourself with work, Arnavji. It isn't good for your health" Khushi said Arnav nodded while Abhay witnessed the scene with amusement.

"Let's move then. I have so much to catch up with you" Abhay said as he opened the cabin door for Khushi.

"Know what I had nearly fell off my chair when I noticed YOU, screaming at the Arnav Singh Raizada. I was expecting him to bite off your head but he was so composed. What's the secret?" Arnav heard the fading voice as both of them stepped out of the cabin.

He was having strange feelings with Khushi leaving with the Singh man. A feeling similar to the one he used to get when NK used to hover around her.

Jerking off the thoughts, he walked back to his chair, smiling at the beautiful time he had with Khushi in this cabin, recalling memories of her feeding him, and accepting to return back to their room.

The clouds were finally dispersing away, giving way to sunlight to reach him.

_________________________________________

A long update it was. 3400 words.

I hope this wasn't below the mark. To clear the situation, Khushi hasn't yet forgiven Arnav. She has just agreed to move back to their room. And Abhay here, is a positive character like the one is SOL.

At last, I want to apologize for delaying the updates but my mom wasn't well and I had several things to deal with. So, there was a little time for writing updates. Now, by god's grace, she is well now and so I am back with the updates. Will try to keep the updates coming.

P.S. Merry Christmas to all of you.

Thank You.

-Kiran

Pearl_Oyster2019-04-13 11:28:09