‘People feel picture ke bahaane aish kar raha’: R Madhavan’s candid take on age gaps with co-stars

R. Madhavan, who was recently seen in Aap Jaisa Koi, has spoken candidly about ageing, career choices, and how perceptions around working with younger heroines shape an actor’s image. The actor admitted that ageing often hits unexpectedly. “One of the first times you get hit about your age is when your kids’ friends start calling you uncle. It hits you by shock but then you have to come to terms with it,” he told Hindustan Times.

Madhavan explained that his age has made him rethink casting choices. “When you are doing movies, you realise that you have to be careful in the choice of heroines, because even though they still want to work with you, it looks like the actor is having fun on the pretext of the movie. People feel ye picture ke bahaane aish kar raha hai. If that is the overwhelming feeling coming out of a movie, then woh character ke liye respect nahi rehta hai,” he said.

He also acknowledged physical limitations that come with age. “There is also the realisation that my body strength is not such that I can do things like a 22-year-old. It’s essential for me to realise that age appropriateness and the kind of people I’m working with are aligned so that it doesn’t look sleazy.”

Alongside career reflections, Madhavan spoke about equality in relationships, drawing from his marriage with Sarita Birje. He said his parents’ bond was deeply loving, but the idea of equality has shifted for his generation. “The relationship that my mother and father shared, they were also equally and deeply in love with each other, and that I think I share with my wife too. But the sense of equality that my father had in the relationship is very different from the sense of equality that I am having right now. We have to define what that equality means.”

On everyday gestures, he pointed out how interpretations have changed. “Sometimes opening a door or holding the door for a lady is considered offensive by some. The guy is not trying to offend, he’s just following his manners. In a patriarchal society, a man allowing his wife to work is considered generous. Saying ‘I’m proud my wife is working’ is the better way.”

Madhavan’s words highlight how ageing and evolving social values influence both personal and professional choices in the film industry.