From & To Sathish #6 - Page 7

On those days when you miss someone the most, as though your memories are sharp enough to slice through skin and bone, remember how they loved you.

Remember how they loved you and do that, for yourself.

In their name, in their honour.

Love yourself, as they loved you.

They would like that.

On those days when you miss someone the most,

love yourself harder.

People say that what we’re all seeking is a meaning for life. I don’t think that’s what we’re really seeking. I think that what we’re seeking is an experience of being alive, so that our life experiences on the purely physical plane will have resonances with our own innermost being and reality, so that we actually feel the rapture of being alive. ~Joseph Campbell

Have you noticed that death alone awakens our feelings? How we love the friends who have just left us? How we admire those of our teachers who have ceased to speak, their mouths filled with earth! Then the expression of admiration springs forth naturally, that admiration they were perhaps expecting from us all their lives. But do you know why we are always more just and more generous toward the dead? The reason is simple. With them there is no obligation. ~Albert Camus

Try to remember a few rules of life. Don’t say what you’re thinking, and don’t be too quick to act on what you think. Be friendly to people but don’t overdo it. Once you’ve tested out your friends and found them trustworthy, hold onto them. But don’t waste your time shaking hands with every new guy you meet. Don’t be quick to pick a fight, but once you’re in one, hold your own. Listen to many people, but talk to few. Hear everyone’s opinion, but reserve your judgment. And, above all, be true to yourself. ~William Shakespeare

Most people are convinced that as long as they are not overtly forced to do something by an outside power, their decisions are theirs, and that if they want something, it is they who want it. But this is one of the great illusions we have about ourselves. A great number of our decisions are not really our own but are suggested to us from the outside; we have succeeded in persuading ourselves that it is we who have made the decision, whereas we have actually conformed with expectations of others, driven by the fear of isolation and by more direct threats to our life, freedom, and comfort. ~Erich Fromm

The world is increasingly designed to depress us. Happiness isn't very good for the economy. If we were happy with what we had, why would we need more?

How do you sell an anti-ageing moisturiser? You make someone worry about ageing. How do you get people to vote for a political party? You make them worry about immigration. How do you get them to buy insurance? By making them worry about everything. How do you get them to have plastic surgery? By highlighting their physical flaws. How do you get them to watch a TV show? By making them worry about missing out. How do you get them to buy a new smartphone? By making them feel like they are being left behind.

To be calm becomes a kind of revolutionary act. To be happy with your own non upgraded existence. To be comfortable with our messy, human selves, would not be good for business.

 Avan, Aval Adhu 455

Meenakshi sat seething in anger for the conversation with Rajendra had left her feeling humiliated and helpless. A pall of gloom and danger hung all around the hall of the house and realizing their employer's mood and recognizing the danger, everyone in the house stayed out of her sight. Everyone knew and had experienced it firsthand and kept their heads down and went about their work silently. In deadly silence for she knew that she could turn into a monster at the slightest provocation.

Meenakshi raised her right hand and counted the number of people who had got away after embarrassing her and belittling her. Bar none, nobody else other than her parents and Ravi had ever had the temerity to tell her what to do and when to do and how to do it.

' I can count the number of people who are still alive after having insulted me and I can count them using the fingers of just one hand. How dare he treat me like that? Talk to me like I am some stupid child? ' Meenakshi spat her anger and then all her anger began to circle and focus on one point. one problem. One person who was her number one enemy. Madhurima.

' How did that stupid C..t become so rich and powerful? Obviously. she must have slept her way to the top and finally nabbed that old man for a husband and is now the head of such a vast company. It matters not and is of no consequence for she has now wandered back into my side of the woods.'

Like a small insect trapped in the aura of artificial light of a house and fluttering around it, her soul and mind kept circling Madhurima although Fate would have laughed loudly and would have informed her that her life was like water circling the drain before disappearing into the sink.

The shrill screams of her mobile phone startled her and grabbing it Meenakshi was just about to fling it and smash it against the wall when her eyes caught sight of the screen that informed her " Rajendra calling " and she quickly lowered her arm and stared at the phone.

' Why is he calling again? To mess with my head, ego and screw my happiness? Enough. I will tell him to f..k off  ' and answered the call, ' Hi Rajendra. What now? More news about that old cow. What is it this time? Has Modi announced her as one of his party candidates for next year's election?'

Rajendra's laughter was like a rifle shooting a bullet and he laughed for nearly twenty to thirty seconds and finally, managed to form coherent words and said, ' Meenakshi, this is why I find you so adorable and sweet. Your anger and your reckless nature and the F..k you all attitude.'

Taking a moment for time off, he told her, ' Woman, you have everything going for you but patience. If you manage to imbibe that most common trait into your daily life, I am sure that you can do anything that you put your mind to. But....

She returned his laughter sounds with a sarcastic scoff, ' You left it unfinished and I guess you want me to finish it. Okay. I will humor you. " But you will not. Because you don't know what patience means.. Am I correct?'

' Correct. Although, my thoughts about you were tinged with sadness and concern. While you described them with anger and sarcasm. See, this is the difference between you and me. I don't get emotional unless and until it is required. But, you always come across as not just emotional but hyper-emotional and that is why you are talking to me right now.'

Meenakshi clamped her lips shut and with great difficulty held back all the retorts that came naturally to her, and exercising caution asked in an eerily calm voice, ' What is it now, Rajendra? How can I help you?'

' Better. A much better response ' Rajendra replied and then in a placatory tone, ' I called because I just got some new information concerning a person that is connected to this woman Madhurima and I thought I would talk to you about it before I start on what you asked me to do.'

' I see. What is this information and who is it about?'

' Another woman whose name is Gayatri.'

Android Hybrid 25C's sensors picked up the gasp from her master's phone and she went on full alert mode.

' Gayatri? I don't understand Rajendra. How is that bit.h connected with Madhurima?'

' So, you do know this person Gayatri. How do you know her and how well do you know her?'

' I am sorry, Rajendra but I don't know her at all for I just met her just once and that too very briefly.'

' Good. Now tell me about that meeting and when and where it took place and please, I request you not to leave out any details. For even the smallest and inconsequential nugget of information will be of help to me.'

Meenakshi's mind raced to form words and at the same time, her thoughts swirled like a hurricane as she recollected, Gayatri and how she had foiled the theft at the temple in which her own husband Pandyan was involved and how she had ordered the Paliyan Murugan to kill her while she was in the resort in Kodaikanal.

' It was just a very brief meeting. My vehicle suffered a flat and Ravi who was passing by stopped to help me and this woman, Gayatri happened to be with him. That's all. Ravi introduced her and that was it. They went their way and I in my way.'

Hybrid 25C bent low and placing its synthetic lips provocatively on its master left ear, whispered, ' Lying. Her speech patterns are all wrong. She knows more but is not telling.'

Rajendra glared at his creation and waved it away and spoke into the phone, ' Thank you, Meenakshi. I feel disappointed for I thought that I would be able to learn a little bit more about this Gayatri.'

Meenakshi could not hold back her frustration and asked in a defiant tone, ' Rajendra, what is with you and all these questions? This woman was just there for a few days to shoot some photos of that Archeological site that lies inside Kumarapalayam. She is gone now. So how can she be connected to that Bengali Madhurima?'

Rajendra hesitated but his hesitation did not last long for the large screen in front of him flickered to life and his father, his King Raja Durai appeared on screen and nodded his head and whispered, ' Do it, my prince. Tell her and let her loose. She is our bait and I am sure if we stir the waters hard enough, something will take the bait and we can reel it in.'

' Rajendra, Rajendra. Are you there? I cannot hear anything?'

' I am here Meenakshi. I was just caught up in my own thoughts and at the same time wondering if I should tell you more about Gayatri and how she is connected to your enemy Madhurima.'

' I don't get it. How can they both be connected? In what way? ' and pausing to think about what he had just said, ' You think they are friends. It is a possibility because they both are from Mumbai.'

'Meenakshi, they are more than just friends. They are family.'

' Family? How is that possible? Madhurima is a Bengali and it is etched in her face. This bi.ch Gayatri is obviously not Bengali and is most probably a Marathi or at the most a Gujju babe.'

' Correct. Yet, they are family and one is a parent and the other is the daughter.'

' What? WTF? Meenakshi yelled at the top of her voice.'

The time has come to settle everything and the time now is to walk towards the climax. It is time now to prepare for the endgame.

As always the game is about life and death. Heaven and hell.

Who will live and who will die?

The boy who went into the dark seeking light and who came back darker than before.

  Can you see, really see? What do you see?

The parable of the blind men and an elephant is a story of a group of blind men who have never come across an elephant before and who learn and imagine what the elephant is like by touching it.

The earliest versions of the parable of the blind men and the elephant are found in Buddhist, Hindu, and Jain texts, as they discuss the limits of perception and the importance of complete context. The parable has several Indian variations but broadly goes as follows.

    A group of blind men heard that a strange animal, called an elephant, had been brought to the town, but none of them were aware of its shape and form. Out of curiosity, they said: "We must inspect and know it by touch, of which we are capable". So, they sought it out, and when they found it they groped about it. The first person, whose hand landed on the trunk, said, "This being is like a thick snake". For another one whose hand reached its ear, it seemed like a kind of fan. Another person, whose hand was upon its leg, said, the elephant is a pillar like a tree trunk. The blind man who placed his hand upon its side said this being feels like a wall. Another who felt its tail described it as a rope. The last felt its tusk, stating the elephant is that which is hard, smooth, and like a spear.

In some versions, the blind men then discover their disagreements and come to blows.

The Buddhist text Tittha Sutta, Udāna 6.4, Khuddaka Nikaya, contains one of the earliest versions of the story. The Tittha Sutta is dated to around c. 500 BCE, during the lifetime of the Buddha.

I see this same story being enacted almost on a daily basis in the present 2523 years later at the Gym, Beach, or at work. But in the present version of that tale, Life replaces the elephant and the blind men are instead ones who can see perfectly.

I am weird in my own weird way and have learned to cope and live with that weirdness and also with the weirdness of other weird people around me in this weird world.

A man sat alone staring at the sea, lost in the depths of his thoughts and the abyss that was his life, and most probably sat comparing notes with the sea.

He spoke, wished, smiled, nodded, and on are occasions shared a word with those who shared a word with him. He reflected, reciprocated, and did them both in a polite manner.

From afar one person asked the other, ' What's with that guy? I have seen him around for more than 10 years now but hardly know anything about him. Keeps to himself.'

The other person replied, ' I don't know much about him but the fact that he hardly talks to anyone and kind of subtly ignores everyone.'

The third person jumped in, ' It is obvious that he is a snob.'

The fourth person waded in, ' I don't know about him being a snob or not but he looks a bit weird and frankly speaking, gives me the creeps.'

The fifth person whispered to the others, ' Come close and I will let you in on what I know about him ' and once they huddled their heads, he told them that the person they were talking about was a bonafide psycho.

The rest of them went " AH! OH! I see! That explains it all so clearly.'

I see this played out almost on a daily basis at work, on TV, on social platforms, and yes, at the beach among friends.

A group of people come together and decide who is right and who is wrong and sadly, what is right and what is wrong.

It could be the government, it could be your colleagues at work or sadly it could be your so-called best friends.

Me? What about me?

Well, to be honest, I think I am totally weird, fully Loco, and sadly a thriving loco. Go figure that out.

I could not help myself and hence posted this video here in our forum. Posted, no. Sharing yes and the reason I did that because this video concerns Chevalier Nadigar Thilagam Sivaji Ganesan.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jyIe7Mqs384

https://youtu.be/7o6CVLFk4po?si=cCqp1IGugc-2dHT1

                                          Avan, Aval Adhu 456

The polygraph, invented in the early 1920s and often incorrectly referred to as a lie detector test, is a device or procedure that measures and records several physiological indicators such as blood pressure, pulse, respiration, and skin conductivity while a person is asked and answers a series of questions. It detects physiological responses to lying (such as elevated heart and respiratory rates as well as spikes in blood pressure. Three main areas of the brain are stimulated during deception: the frontal lobe, the limbic system, and the temporal lobe.

Rajendra who had already been made aware by his Android machine Hybrid 25C regarding Meenakshi lying and hiding some vital information from him, asked her in a subdued voice, ' Why this shock reaction, Meenakshi? What is the big deal about this Gayatri and Madhurima being related?'

Meenakshi's voice stammered as she spoke, ' I guess because the news was sudden and a bit shocking and also because I have been high-strung and on edge these past two weeks. But, you are right for it is no big deal and no concern of mine how they are related to each other.'

Rajendra could not help but marvel and appreciate how calmly and smoothly Meenakshi lied and evaded him and glanced at his seven-foot Android who said, ' Lying again. There is something she is not telling you, master. Something very important.'

He raised his hand indicating that he was aware of it and continued the conversation with Meenakshi.

' All right then. I will keep in touch and update you if I learn more and hopefully, I can get this done in a couple of days. It is going to be tricky but I will give it my best shot.'

' Your best shot will not do. I want this woman dead and buried, Rajendra. You promised me.'

' I know what I promised you Meenakshi and I am a man who honors his promises. You don't have to remind me about it.'

' Then do something quickly, please. I don't want that bitch near Ravi or for that matter, I want her gone from my land. Dead and gone.'

' Patience, Meenakshi. This is not some childish game that we are playing here. We are talking about murdering a person who is connected to the ruling party of this country. One small mistake. Just a tiny error in judgment will be enough for the cops to sniff us out. I cannot afford to face that kind of problem right now.'

She snarled in anger and then there was no holding back her retorts. ' All I hear is talk, talk and more talk. But no talk about action and results.'

Rajendra bit back and countered her attack, ' Before you say anything more, please stop and think about your actions and results from both the attempts on this woman.'

A harsh silence prevailed for a few moments between their phones and then Rajendra spoke and broke the coldness that threatened to kill their temporary partnership.

' Before, I make my move, I need to know more about this woman and what kind of security she has right now. I know a few people in the department here and up north in Delhi who I am sure will be able to help me out and once that is done, I will contact you.'

' Okay. Thank you. I am sorry for snapping at you like that. I shouldn't have done that.'

' No. You shouldn't have done that for it makes no sense to antagonize and push away the very people who are trying to help you. If you persist in doing that, you will soon find yourself all alone with no one to turn to.  ' and then, in an ominous tone, ' I am sorry if what I am going to say offends you or hurts you. Forgive me Meenakshi but I feel that it is important and that you need to know about it.'

Meenakshi remained silent and taking it as a cue, Rajendra spoke to her but in a softer tone that was tinged with melancholia and sadness.

' He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have ' and then he quickly said ' Bye for now ' and disconnected the call leaving Meenakshi staring at her phone and the words she had just heard Rajendra say.

At the same time, Android Hybrid 25C stared at her creator wondering what was going on in his head. She was sure of one thing and that was he was sad and lonely and that it somehow seemed to affect its own thoughts and activities.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GZ5-OToF5qQ

                                          Avan, Aval Adhu 457

The healthy man does not torture others. It is the tortured who turn into torturers. Carl Jung

Meenakshi sat staring daggers at her phone that had just moments ago connected her to Rajendra who had ended the call by telling her that she would never be happy even if she was blessed with all that her heart desired.

She ruminated on the words that he had spoken, ' He who is not contented with what he has, would not be contented with what he would like to have ' and snarled angrily, ' How can I be content when the only thing that I loved and craved was stolen from me?'

She stood up and surveyed the huge mansion that was her house and thought, ' But, I would have been happier living in a hut with Ravi and would have been happier if we were both living all alone on an island with no other human in a 1000 km radius.'

She looked at the phone accusingly, ' Rajendra was wrong about me. I have become this person because Ravi betrayed me by breaking my heart. I was all that she was not. Richer, better looking, bolder, powerful and I worshipped the very ground that he walked on, and yet he chose that Bi.ch over me, and now she has come back.'

Her eyes opened wide as she asked herself, ' Does he know? Does Ravi know that Madhurima and Gayatri are related? ' and shaking her head in a deliberate manner, ' I doubt it. What cheap game are they playing with my Ravi?'

Sitting back and sinking into the sofa chair, she closed her eyes and began to think hard all the while telling herself, ' This might be the only chance you will get, Meenakshi. Better make it work and better make it count for there might not be a second chance.'

Ravi and Madhu came out of his room and Rasaathi Ammal taking one look at her eyes which were red and swollen could not hold back her emotions any longer and she let loose her pain and anger.

' All these years, I spent worrying about my death and leaving my son as an orphan and all alone in this world ' and throwing a pitiful look at Madhu, ' Seeing you step into the house, hope flickered into life in my soul but now I see that it is not to be.

Pointing to Ravi's eyes, ' I would rather he lived alone than be reduced to such a pathetic state.'

' Amma ' Ravi yelled loudly and it had an immediate effect on everybody. Everybody stopped and everything stopped. Inside the house and outside the house. The absence of noise gave new meaning to the metaphor “Silence is deafening ”.

Realizing that he had raised his voice and that too at his mother, Ravi looked at her with guilt-laden eyes and apologized in a soft and humble voice, ' Mother, this situation is not about you or how you feel. It is about me and Madhu, so, please for God's sake stop dishing out all those senti lines.'

Pointing to Madhu, ' And don't forget that first and foremost, she is our guest and...'

If she felt hurt and insulted, she did not reveal them for Rasaathi Ammal knew Ravi very well and immediately understood that he was under tremendous strain.

Aiming to diffuse the mood, she apologized to both Ravi and Madhu and asked them to forgive her rude behavior. No sooner had she spoken those words, Madhu ran to her and hugging her told her not to apologize.

' Mother, please don't apologize. There is no need for that at least not to me. This is your house, this is your life and this situation concerns you and your son. So, you have every right to say what you feel and voice your opinions when you feel the need to do so.'

Rasaathi Ammal looked pointedly at Ravi and he exclaimed in a dramatic manner, Don't I have a right to raise my voice in my own house and that too at my mother? '

Rasaathi Ammal smiled, ' You have all the rights. No need to throw any of your legal and moral tantrums. Just shut your mouth and tell us what you both have decided to do now. Are you getting married tomorrow morning or not? Just tell us that much and put us out of our misery.'

Daksha true to her advocate mentality, raised her hand, and getting everyone's attention declared, ' Ravi, your mum has made a valid point. So, drop all that " this situation is about you and Madhu " bullshit, and tell us what is going on.'

Parthiban clapped his hands loudly and said, ' Bravo. Well said, ducks.'

Ravi looked at Parthiban, his face revealing nothing and yet Partha stopped his clapping and smiling like a boy who had been caught with his hand in the cookie jar, hung his head, and stared hard at the floor.

Ravi Kumar turned to Madhu and asked her, ' Do you trust me? '

This sudden and unexpected question took everyone by surprise and Madhu's big brown eyes flared in confusion.

' I do. Of course, I do.'

Ravi thanked her and then going down on his left knee, took both her hands in his and kissing them gently proposed to her, ' Madhu, will you marry me and make me the happiest man in this world?'

' Of course, I will marry you. But... when?'

Ravi smiled and said, ' Now. Right now and right here in the next few minutes.'

Rasaathi Ammal, Partha, and Daksha were all too stunned to react and they just stood gaping at Ravi and at the same time wondering what Madhu's reply was going to be.

Madhurima looked down at Ravi and into's open face and soft black eyes and heard her Dada whisper to her through the portals of time and into her soul where he lived on as a part of her.

' Madhu beta, there will come a time when life will ask you to place your trust in someone else's hands. When that moment comes, close your eyes and listen to my voice for it will be your voice.'

Madhu did exactly what her late Grandad had told her and was telling her now and closed her eyes and opened them after a few moments and falling to her knees, fell into Ravi's arms.

' I do. I do want to marry you.'

Avan, Aval Adhu 458

' Enough is enough ' Rasaathi Ammal thought to herself and throwing all caution to the wind and casting away fears about what Ravi would say or react to her words, she plunged in head first and asked her son what was going on.

Ravi still on his knees, ' Amma, isn't it obvious what I am doing? I am proposing to Madhu and asking her to marry me.'

' Aiyo, God help me before I go completely mad ' Rasaathi wailed and looked at her son and pleaded ' Dei, don't play your silly mind games with me. Of course, we know you proposed to her and that she has accepted it. But, I thought you both had set your minds on getting married and that it would most probably happen tomorrow. So, what is going on right now? That is my million-dollar question.'

Ravi stood up and offered a hand and helped Madhu to stand up and then throwing a protective hand around her, glanced at his mother and told her that they would be getting married in the next few minutes.

His words exploded like a bomb in all their ears and even Madhu looked at Ravi, ' Jaanu, are you sure about this?' at which Ravi smiled and placing a soft kiss on her head, nodded and told her that he was very sure about it.

' Madhu, I have never been more sure about anything else in my life other than that moment when I first met you and instantly fell in love with you.'

Rasaathi did not know whether to be happy, sad, or mad and exclaimed helplessly, ' How is it going to work? There is so much preparation to be done.'

' Mother, just call our temple priest and ask him to come here. Please, for god's sake don't tell him anything until he reaches our house and that goes for everybody else.'

Rasaathi Ammal looked at him with bewildered eyes and asked him angrily, ' Dei, I had so such grand hopes for your wedding and here you are, getting ready to get married here in our house and right away. My head is spinning, Ravi. I don't understand anything.

' Amma, look at me ' Ravi said and when he had her full attention, ' I am 42 years old and Madhu is nearly the same age as me. Stop and think about that scenario where we are getting married in a grand ceremony. Agreed, I am a bachelor and all that. But, people will talk and gossip about our ages and all that. Do we need that kind of attention on all of us right now?'

He stopped and looked at her, ' Honestly, no. I don't think so ' and his eyes along with his voice became grim as he spoke to his mother, ' What about Meenakshi? Do we need to antagonize her even more and push her into doing something...'

' No' Rasaathi Ammal yelled out loudly and halted Ravi's thoughts. ' I get it. I understand what you are saying here. Okay, but what are we going to do for a Thali now? At least give me a couple of hours to go to Madurai and buy some jewelry for both of you.'

Ravi sighed and said, ' Amma, stop, slow down and think ' and looked at her patiently and Madhu recognizing the expression, remembered what he had said in the room asked him, ' Jaanu, what are you up to? It is obvious you have an ace up your sleeve. So, just reveal it, please.'

Mother and son kept staring at each other and then all of them saw a flicker of memory in Rasaathi Ammal's eyes and she yelled, ' Of course ' and slapping her own head hurried into Ravi's room and came back with a small white pouch that was stained yellow and red in color.

They all instantly recognized the stains and knew that they could have been caused only by turmeric and vermillion aka Kum kum and that automatically meant something religious and auspicious.

' Amma, place it in the pooja room and call the priest and tell him that we need him here right away. As quickly as possible.'

Daksha with a sly smile, ' Master, don't worry. I doubt if Madhu is going to change her mind anytime soon or worse, run away if given the opportunity. So, chill bro. She is all yours now and you are all hers now.'

Ravi mockingly glared at Ducks and with his eyes signaled them to turn away, and, the moment they did that, he quickly placed a kiss on her lips, and hearing his mother finishing up with her phone call to the priest, he folded his hands and stood looking very paavam and innocent.

Parthiban muttered softly,  ' Dei, Pothunda, actingu.'

Rasaathi Ammal informed them that the priest would be arriving any moment and looked at both of them.

Ravi spotting the questions and worries in her eyes smiled and whispered something to Madhu and both of them returned to his bedroom.

https://youtu.be/HeBcqjm13K4?si=6eRcutPhn12Qqd3L