“Love, like everything else in life, should be a discovery, an adventure, and like most adventures, you don’t know you’re having one until you’re right in the middle of it.”
― E.A. Bucchianeri, Brushstrokes of a Gadfly,
One fine day on 18th March two people randomly waltzed into our lives and life as we know it changed. It did change for me because I had given up on the entire idea of Tv Shows as none of the recent ones had managed to grab my attention. Also I knew that if I allow myself to get too attached to characters I will become obsessed so I kind of stopped watching any show but then I stumbled upon the promo for this show. I had seen bits and pieces of Rhea and Shaheer’s previous shows and I loved the concept shown in the promo since it hit too close to home. When I started this show I had no idea that I will resurrect my IF account and my twitter account I had no idea that 115 episodes later I will be here ignoring all the other things in life and penning a post on Mishbir. Through this post I want to thank each and everyone who made Mishbir possible and I would also like to thank you the reader because you keep reading all my long posts and never hesitate from giving me love. Thank you This entire post is an ode to the Mishbir journey.
Strangers
“. . .sometimes one feels freer speaking to a stranger than to people one knows. Why is that?"
“Probably because a stranger sees us the way we are, not as he wishes to think we are.”
― Carlos Ruiz Zafón, The Shadow of the Wind
When we are introduced to Mishbir they are both strangers to each other. From Misthi’s intro we know she is an over-achiever and an over-thinker as she takes time to decide on what she wants to eat. Abir’s character is sitting on top of a bus clicking pictures. From his intro we know that he is free bird and a free spirited individual who probably loves photography and travelling. As he is clicking pictures she is climbing the ladder to the top of the bus. His camera manages to capture her eyes and from the get go he is intrigued and we are treated to his wonderful poetry of tasveer main kis ka chera hain. They don’t see each other’s face but they sit with their back facing each other. As the bus crosses a bump he is about to fall but she gives him her hand to prevent her from falling. The people around them claim how the heroine has managed to save the hero breaking ITV stereotypes in a very subtle way. To which she replies : Haath samblany kay liay dia tha thamnay kay liay nahi" she explains how she only gave him her hand to stabilize him. At this time Abir is a stranger for her and she doesn't want her to get any ideas of the wrong sort.
Then she goes on to say a heartbreaking dialogue.
"Waisay bhi Jab apnay hi haath chod jayay toh haath thamnay ki aadat nahi rehti" Both Abir and Mish remember their father and for the first time we see a glimpse of two people who have a common past who have the potential to bond and understand eachother because they both know how much it hurts when you are left behind by your loved ones. Abir’s poetry is apt here “Ajneeabi kay haath say haath mila toh laga yay ristha ghera hain. As fate would have it they keep meeting as strangers. He hears her crying after telling her life story and assures her “Zindagi muskil hi rehati hain bas humay thoda strong ban kar rehna chaiyay. Jaisay khusi main hasna normal hain waisay rona bhi normal hain” She doesn’t know but oddly his words give her sense of comfort for he doesn’t judge her for crying he doesn’t sugar coat things for her he tells he that life is hard but we need to be strong if we need to rise above everything. She is overwhelmed by her dad’s return and while she pours her heart out in a song he is busy in finding his sister but for a minute he stops and admires the girl who is singing so soulfully. So, as strangers both AM intrigue each other and they can’t help but feel an odd sense of connection with eachother.
Pain
They say that abandonment is a wound that never heals. I say only that an abandoned child never forgets.
Mario Balotelli
Another common theme that links AM together is pain. They have both been abandoned by their fathers at an early age. When we come in to this world our parents our the first exposure we have to the real world. Naturally parents are supposed to nurture us and love us unconditionally but if the same parents one day decide to leave for whatever reason they permanently scar the child they are leaving behind. Abir once said “Baap jab bachpa main chod kar jata hain toh saath bachpan bhi lay jaati hain” the small child is forced to grow up and deal with the harsh realities of life. This betrayal comes from someone the child looks up to and it hurts so much to be left behind that you stop believing that for someone you are enough that for someone you are worth staying for. Misthi’s wounds run deeper because her mother left her for someone else and even her grandmother refused to take her responsibility. She starts living in the Masheswari household and is placed under the loving care of her Bade Papa and Badi Maa who leave no stone unturned to make sure she has a comfortable life. However, she feels like she is a burden/bhoj on them as characters like Jasmeet and Kuhu keep reminding her of her adopted status. The difference between Misthi and Abir is that Misthi knows how to deal with her pain. She cries for a bit but than dusts herself up and moves forward Abir though has managed to conceal his pain really well and he has buried it really deep within himself in a way that for him “Dard toh dost purana hain”. He ignores his own pain by trying to help other people and by making them smile but he has no one who asks him if he needs support no one who bothers too see if he is really okay. Both Mish and Abir are surrounded by people but they still feel alone. Pain is the reason they meet again for the second time amongst those temple ruins. That day Abir tells her a very profound thing “Upar walay ki awaaz hamesha upar say nahi aah ti. Kabhi kabhi who kisi aur ko bhej dayta hain kisi ko humrahi madad karnay ki. Ho sakta hain kay upar walay nay mujay aap ki problem solve karnay kay liay bheja hain yay phir app ko meri. In short upar wala hum dono ki help kar raha hain” These lines are so deep and so true. Sometimes God helps us in mysterious ways and often in way in which we don’t expect. He tells her that maybe God has sent him in her life to help her or vice versa and in this way God is helping them both. Unknowingly Misthi misplaces her earring that day but he picks it up and keeps it safe he muses that this earring signifies” Humarhi qismat main phir say milan likha hain” and how apt was that. The whole sequence is beautiful. In midst of the temple ruins two pain-ridden individuals heal each other a bit unexpectedly. How beautifully has fate interweaved these two strangers together.
Holi-Festival of colors
“There are 365 days in a year and you will meet all the colours of life throughout the year: The blue, the black, the pink… Only blue is not a life, only pink is not a life, only black is not a life! Life is all the colours!”
― Mehmet Murat ildan
Holi is another special occasion in AM’s life as it is the first festival which they celebrate together. The night before the actual function is iconic. BB finds Misthi’s earrings in Abir’s things and gives Kunal the task to find out who they belong too. Kunal asks his bhai about them and Abir says “Samaj lay teri Bhabhi ka hain” He says that in jest and just for fun’s sake but BB is hanging on to his every word and later proceeds to throw the earrings in the bonfire citing the fact that how all bad things need to burned. Abir however, steps in front of fire and manages to save the earrings and tells BB that these belong to the person who brought Ketki back so they are indebted to her and he will make sure they reach their rightful owner. Disgruntled by his Maa’s behavior he leaves for the mandir and distributes sweets amongst kids. He muses on how holi is celebrated every year but there is still so much evil in the world and he prays that “Kisi ko burai/paap kay saath jeena na seekhna padhay” At the other end Misthi’s whole world comes crashing down as she witnesses her own father blackmailing her BM for money. She manages to steal the money bag from her father and storms away on her cycle. This is when Abir meets her again. “Rajkot mian bullet train” he says as he sees her speeding of on her cycle. Naman asks Abir for help as someone has stolen something from him. Abir rushes to intercept the chor and is surprised to find out that it’s a girl. “Larkiyan toh ajj kal har field main aghay nikal rahi hain” he muses to himself as he is kind of impressed with this bold woman in front of him. For the first time he addresses her as angry chorni and throws color on her face. He tells her that “Tum galat kar rahi ho” she is wiping the color off from her face and at the same time trying to yank off the bag from his hands a lone tear falls from her eyes and she says “Galat toh who tha jo ho raha tha main toh bas ussay sahi karnay ki koshish kar rahi hu” and just like that he believes her and lets her go. As fate would have it they meet again the very next day as their families have mutual friends and there are talks about Kuku’s ristha. A chance encounter again brings them face to face. Abir has thrown color on her unknowingly and she wants revenge. She hides behind the pillar and witnesses Abir in all his swag telling other people “Jo mujhay rangnay ahatay hain meray hi rang main rang jaatay hain” as he walks away she calls out to him. “Par aaj main tumhay apnay ranh main rang du gi” and tries to throw color at him. They both see each other for the first time and we also get our first suno moment.
Friends
“Friendship is unnecessary, like philosophy, like art.... It has no survival value; rather it is one of those things which give value to survival.”
― C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves
Chance encounters make sure that both AM keep crossing eachother’s paths. The ristha gets exchanged and Abir tries his best to mould things in such a way that the Mashewaris are compelled to consider the ristha. At Ketki’s sangeet as Mish arrives with her family he is mesmerized to see her and can’t seem to fathom why he is suddenly feeling so sad about the fact that the Mahs are considering the ristha. In midst of everything else Misthi manages to find him as she wants his help to figure out her stance on her courtship demand “Iss ghar main aik tum hi toh meray dost ho” He is surprised “Hum dost hain?” . “Kyun nahi hain?” she asks him to which he replies that they indeed our friends. Over the course of time we see how these two cuties become the best of friends. The share countless moments where they motivate each other and even confide in each other. When she is confused about her courtship demand and is contemplating is she is doing the right thing he tells her that she is doing the right thing and she should believe in herself. When he is feeling low after Ketki’s marriage is called off she finds him by the river side. Overwhelmed by all his emotions he hugs her and than tells her “Tum awesome ho”Their bond is reflected in Misthi’s words “Kay yay matter nahi karta kay dosti kitni purani hain yay matter karta hain kay dosti kitni gehri hain”. In spite of knowing each other for just a brief period these two have managed to forge a very strong bond with each other.
Painting
“I paint my own reality. The only thing I know is that I paint because I need to, and I paint whatever passes through my head without any other consideration.”
― Frida Kahlo
The painting is the first object that gives a voice to Abir’s feelings.
“Jo baat mujay say keh na payay
Alafaz saray mil kar bhi
Woh bolti tasveer hain”
He can’t seem to give a name to the onslaught of feelings he has for Misthi. He is confused but when he is asked to make a painting as a center piece for his exhibition unknowingly, he paints her. Parul Maasi told him to paint from his heart and as he looks at the picture that has now filled the blank canvas he sinks to the ground. Misthi is not supposed to be his as she has been promised to his brother but yet his heart believes that she belongs to him and him only. As Mishti ask him about the painting “Kitni pretty hain?” He tells her “ Ghar jaisi simple si sada si lakin bohot khoobsurat” these words are so impactful as we get to know that the wanderer/banjara Abir considers her to be his home. On the day of the exhibition she again asks him about the painting and is worried that somehow that painting has affected him greatly. “Main bas itna jaanta hu kay mera iss say bohot ghera ristha hain who ristha kyun hain kiya hain main nahi jaan ta” he tells her that he has a very deep bond with girl in his painting but he can’t seem to give a name to this bond and his feelings. Later that day when a fire breaks out in the exhibition venue she stays back and tries to keep his painting safe “Abir yay painting tumhari liya bohot important hain na” she hands it over to him and finally gives a name to his feelings. He finally acknowledges that he is in love with her. The painting makes a reappearance when he tries to make her jealous by telling her that he has a special painting wali in his life. As fate would have it she stumbles on the painting by mistake and is surprised to find out that he painted her and that he loves her. As she goes back home that night she breaks down “Abir nay meri painting banai woh mujah say pyar karta hain” she can’t believe it as she didn’t think she was worthy of love but this boy just went ahead and immortalized her in a painting. On some other day e tries to show her the painting and tells her that he has finally figured out what his painting wali means to him but she runs away without looking at it. One thing is certain though that days she gets to know that even she is in love with him.
Little things
It has long been an axiom of mine that the little things are infinitely the most important.”
? Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, The Memoirs of Sherlock Holmes
AM has made me fall in love with them because of the little things they did for each other. For me the sweetest AM moment was when Abir gifted Mish a new pair of glasses.“Misthi yay choti si baat hain tum aisay kyun react kar rahi ho” He asks her when she is visibly affected by his gesture.“Abir subah say inta kuch ho raha tha kisi nay iss baat oar dehayn hi nahi diya kay mera chasma toot gaya tha” She tells him how nobody bothered about her glasses but he did. It might be a little thing for him but it means a lot. “Aik shezadi jis ka chasma hi uss ki pechaan hain” Abir says this to her when they are in Champnar. Such simple words but how beautifully they convey the love Abir has for her. Glasses in our South Asian society have always been looked down upon. Girls are mostly told that they look better without them. I am one such girl. I have been wearing glasses since grade 5 and I have been made fun of but as Mish said these glasses are a part of me. They are a part of my personality. Too see a guy like Abir appreciating Mish for them and for making her realize that he loves her with or without glasses. The way they handled this particular subject was so profound more often ITV FLs are shown to be gorgeous and their makeup is always on point or they are shown to be extra simple Mish though is shown to be so real , the true face of what an empowered women should be like. The fact that Abir loves her the way she is became even clearer due to this particular sequence. For he cares about the girl behind the frames. The specialty of AM is in the little things such as forehead kisses, accidental hand touches, intense eye locks, deliberate intertwining of hands, a painting , a shoe, a pair of earrings, a cup of coffee and a red balloon. They make us see beauty in simplicity.
Something more
“What could be more than being friends? What could be more than what it felt like to wait by the phone to hear that she was okay? More than waiting to discuss every case with her?”
― Sonali Dev, A Distant Heart
As time goes on they become something more than friends they both love each-other but they are in no mood to confess it to each-other. In this phase we got some beautiful sequences such as the coffee one and the aankon ki gustakain one we also get to see our babies exchanging a series of video calls, texts and other calls. Some of the most iconic lines they said during this phase are mentioned below:
“Pyar bohot qismat walon ko milta hain aur agar meri qismat main pyar hain toh main ussay aisay hi nahi janay du ga”
“Tumhari liay Abir, tum nay hamesha mera saath diya hain hamesha meri problems fix ki hain”
“Sach bohot khoobsurat hota hain Misthi tumhara dil saaf hain iss liay toh itna khoobsurat hain”
“ Jaanti hu kay tum hamesha mera saath doh gay aur main tumhara”
“Tum galtiyan thoda kam kiya karo aur tum thodi zyada”
“Puri dunya say alag ho tum”
“Tumharay jaisa life partner mujhay mil hi nahi sakta tha kyun tum mujhay badlna nahi chaatay”
I would like to cap it off with Abir’s beautiful Shayri:
“Hain aik ristha aur bhi bay-daag say bay-naam sa
Tapti darthi kay liay baarish kay paigaam sa
Naam rakha toh zamanay ko khabar lag jayay gi
Mujhay dar hain uss ko dunya ki nazar lag jayay gi
Waisay bhi kab naam ki dil ko hui daarkar hain
Dil toh hamesha jaanta hain
Yay pyaar hain hah pyar hain”
He then goes on to claim that his heart actually doesn’t need him to label his feelings for her because the heart knows that these are not just mere feelings what he is feeling is real love which is why he is so afraid to lose it.
After 115 episodes and a plethora of Mishbir moments we have finally reached the stage where they confess their love to each other.
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