THE SUICIDE NOTE
Papa teen saal pehle jab maine apko Sameer k bare mein bataya tha to mujhe laga tha ki kuch samay me baad aap maan jayege aur sayad aap bhi itne dinon tak yahi sochte rahe ki main apki baat samajh jaungi. Aisa nahi hai ki apke point of view se maine sochne ki koshish nahi ki..yahan tak ki maine yeh faisla bhi kar liya tha ki main Sameer ko bhulne ki puri koshish karungi lekin ye sayad possible hi nahi...Sameer aur main ek ho chuke hain. Mujhe pata hai apko meri ye baatein filmy aur kitabi lagengi lekin in baton ko maine khud mehsus kiya hai aur tabhi mujhe bhi yakin ho gya in shabdon par.. Do dil ek jaan hona sirf ek kahawat nahi hai. Ye mere aur Sameer ki sachai hai.. Apne hi to mujhe sikhaya tha apne promises ko pura karna to phir Sameer se kiye apne saare promises main kaise tod sakti hun.. Aapne kaha tha sach ka sath dena aur sach yahi hai ki main aur Sameer ek dusre se bahot pyar karte hain.. Aapne kaha tha ki kabhi jhuth nahi bolna isliye maine Sameer ke bare mein sab kuch bata diya.. Main apki saari baatein maan sakti hun lekin Sharad se shadi nahi kar sakti..Main khud ko Sameer ko, Sharad ko aur apko bhi dhokha nahi de sakti.. Main ek jhoothi zindagi nahi ji sakti..Main Sharad ko kabhi bhi khud ko haath lagane nahi de sakti wo mere karib khada bhi hota hai to mujhe khud se nafrat hoti hai Sameer se main pyar karti hun iska ye bilkul bhi matlab nahi hai ki main apki ijjat nahi karti..Teen saal aapne mere aur Sameer ke bich baat nahi hone di lekin tab bhi mujhse wo nahi ho paya jo aap chahte hai.
Papa main Sameer se bahot pyar karti hun. Itna ki Sameer ke bina, mere hone ka koi matlab nahi hai. Aap chahe mujhe Sameer se kitna bhi dur kar de lekin kabhi Meri rooh se Sameer ko nahi mita payege. Sameer ko bhulna mere bas mein nahi hai papa. Wo mere andar saans leta hai. Meri dhadkane uske liye dhadakti hain. Sameer se chahe hazaro mile dur chali jaaun lekin wo mere utna hi karib aata jayega kyuki jitna main usse dur jati Hun utna hi uske bare mein sochti hun lekin jab wo mere paas hota hai to main sabkuch bhul jati hun...bhul jati hun ki ye duniya mere bare me Kya sochti hai.ye samaj apke bare mein kya sochta h.. Sameer ke sath koi darr nahi hota mujhe kyuki mujhe pata hai ki wo mere sath kabhi bhi kuch galat nahi hone dega.. jab wo mere haatho ko apne haatho me Leta...jab bhi wo mujhe apni bahon me Leta hai... Jab bhi wo mere maathe ko chumta hai..Meri aankhein khud band ho jati hai.. kyuki tab main uski aankho se is duniya ko dekhti hun.. wo mujhe yakin dilata hai ki ye duniya jaha sirf khudgarzi hai wo khubsurat bhi hai...mujhe yakin ho jata hai papa ki Sameer sab kuch samhal sakta hai.. uske hote hue mujhe kuch bhi sochne samajhne ki jarurat nahi hai.. main khud ko surakshit mehsus karti hun... Apne sapnon ko mehfooz dekhti hun..aur haan khud ko Sameer ke sath main duniya ki sabse khubsurat ladki bhi mehsus karti hun ...Apne bhavishya ko main sirf Sameer ke sath dekh sakti Hun papa ..
lekin main janti hun ki aap kabhi bhi nahi manege... Jab Sameer ne mujhse kaha tha ki wo mujhse pyar karta hai to maine uske pyar ko thukra diya tha ye soch kar ki aap nahi manege.. lekin uske pyar ne mujhe pyar pe bharosa karna sikha diya aur mujhe laga ki jitna pyar Sameer mujhse karta hai..usse Jada mere papa krte hai jo mujhe is duniya me lekar aaye, maa ki bhi kami ko pura kiya, mere wo papa mere liye,Meri Khushi k liye maan jayege. Mujhe yakin tha ki mere papa sabse Jada mujhse pyar karte hain aur isliye mere pyar ko apna lege... Lekin main galat thi papa.. mera mann ab bhi ye nahi manta ki aap mujhse jada is selfish duniya se pyar karte hain. Lekin sach sayad yahi hai.. aur is sach ke sath main nahi ji sakti papa.. main apse aur Sameer se bahot pyar karti hun lekin aaj aap dono ki kasht ki wajah main hun.. papa main aap dono ki muskurahat ki wajah banna chahti thi lekin aap dono me se kisi ek ko chunna mere liye namumkin hai. Meri maut ek accident hogi taki insurance ke paiso se Preeti ki aage ki padhai ho jaye.
Aapki pyari Naina
...
Naina applied a screeching break to her scooty before accelerating to death, to reliv those moments which she had spent with Sameer..
Flashback
Sameer- Jis din tumhe ye lage ki tum apni life ko end karna chahti ho..tum kar dena end.. khud ko apne liye khatm kar dena.. apne sare rishto ko pichhe chhodkar.. is duniya ki bandhano se mukt hokar.. sahi aur galat ke daayro se nikal kar.. mere paas chali aana ..main tumhe ek nayi life dunga.. tum ek naya janam logi.. aur us jivan mein tum sirf khush rahogi promise.. us jivan mein hum dono rahege aur koi bhi nahi.. Promise us jivan mein tum "tum rahogi jo bahot se sapne dekhti hai aur unhe pura karna bhi janti hai.. Your Happiness is My Goal.
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Aisa to nahi hai ki mere papa ko mere marne se dukh nahi hoga.. dukh to unhe mere aur Sameer ki shadi see bhi hoga.. log mere marne pe bhi baatein bnayege ki Jawan ladki ne suicide kyu Kiya aur Sameer se Sadi karne pe bhi baatein to banengi hi..
Now Naina knew what she ought to do.. Naina took a U-turn and chose a blissful life for herself and for her Sameer. She decided to break all the shackles of this virtual cruel world.. She surpassed all the norms and bonds of the society.. She reached Sameer's home and ran over Sameer for a hug..Sameer knew now she was his and that it was a hug for a lifetime.
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Jeete Hain chal
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