Bollywood fairytales have this beautiful ending. The hero has a realization in the middle of his wedding ceremony and suddenly decides that he's going to follow his heart and run after the girl he actually wanted to marry, not his bua's niece's cousin's friend for family izzat and all. But what happens to the girl that leaves behind? No one ever cares about her.
My situation was that of the left behind girl. Pooja and Yash did their thing and fell in love. The world glorified them and even pitied them for being bound by their marriages. How funny is that, Yash cheated on me and then he became a hero for finding his true love. And Pooja...her diary was reason enough to make her seem like the victim of everything. It still baffles me how Pooja cheated on a guy like Aditya Hooda.
Oh, Aditya Hooda. I guess that's the one good thing that came out of this mess Yash and Pooja created. As much as I knew it's wrong, a part of me always wanted to be the center of his attention. I mean, could you even blame me? When I thought my life was perfect, I found out my freakin' husband was having an affair and then died. Fate bought me closer to Aditya, when that goddamned Rajveer put us on trial for murder, Aditya stood by me in ways I longed for Yash to. I fell in love with Yash consciously, I knew his shortcomings and yet I chose to marry him but with Aditya, it was all so different. I wanted to be under his protection forever. He was the kind of guy I didn't need to live in Mussorie with, because I would be fine anywhere in his company. He was the kind of guy that I wanted to end my days with and wake up to. And it killed me! Aditya Hooda had such a damning effect on my life and I had no control over myself around him.
I'd be lying if I said I didn't hope he reciprocated these thoughts. But I knew the probability was highly unlikely. Aditya was the polar opposite of me. Ever since we gotten Yash and Pooja's murder case closed, it was a breath of fresh air in his life. He got back to flying soon enough and his off-days were spent at the club "living his best life as he called it. I spent my days at home with ammi and abbu, as they relocated to Mumbai. Noor had married Arjun in a beautiful ceremony with the blessings of both families, leaving me sort of by myself in the house. Though she lived literally twenty minutes away and visited almost every day, I missed her bubbly presence in our house. She would jokingly tell me to marry Aditya just to be in the same house as her. Not just her, everyone hoped Aditya and I would marry, even my parents. My parents who were dead opposed to me marrying outside of our religion thought Aditya and I were perfect. It created a hell of a lot of awkward moments bumping into each other at family functions. I'd be lying if I said I didn't think of about it sometimes, but given the differences between us, I gave up hope that anything would ever happen between us.
Till it did.
I had to go to Mussorie to finalize paperwork for the sale of my former home and Abu & Ammi had to attend a funeral for their distant relative the same weekend and obviously everyone thought I wasn't properly equipped to conduct a business deal by myself, because...you know...casual sexism. So Aditya ended up coming with me. While the paperwork seemed to end quickly, I was left with nothing but haunting memories of that place of that house. A place that I had loved so much had given me so many bitter memories that I found it difficult to step out of my room. I guess Aditya even understood that. He had always moved on quicker and seemed to have a better grasp on life than I did and I kind of envied him for that. I wanted to be that happy and carefree.
That night at the fireside I couldn't help the tears streaming down my face as I threw more pictures into the fire hoping that they would burn my feelings away too. As I looked up, I saw Aditya approaching me with his expression a little more sombre than normal.
"Please don't say anything. I don't need to hear more about how I've been a lovesick fool for Yash, I really don't Aditya."
He sat quietly down, both of us facing the fireplace.
"It's so easy for guys to hook up with anyone. What was wrong with me?" I asked.
"There's nothing wrong with you Zoya. He responded. "The way I look at it is, maybe we were just never meant to be. I became Pooja's best friend, but I couldn't become her husband in true sense. Maybe I wasn't meant to be with her."
"Aditya, I'm going to be 30! I screamed. "What have I ever done in life besides make my parents miserable, marry the wrong guy and do nothing productive with my life? I feel so worthless. I wailed.
"Zoya, stop panicking! He said and threw his arms around me, "you'll be fine, I promise."
"Sorry, I got mascara on your shirt."
He chuckled before kissing me on my forehead, reassuring me that everything was okay. I couldn't help but kiss him back on the cheek in response.
As I moved away, I saw his eyes dilate with desire. And could you really blame me for what happened next?
**
I tried not to cry. I really tried. But when I stood in his room with the results of our forbidden nights in my hand. I couldn't help it. I was strong, I knew he wouldn't want this child. But he had the right to know that I was having his child. I had fallen hopelessly in love with this man. Amongst our nok-jhok, roothna-manana and those sensual nights, I began loving Aditya with a fervor that I had never experienced before.
"I want to keep it...him or her. You don't have to be apart of his or her's life, I will never ask anything of you. Just please let me have the happiness of having a child. "
I begged.
I scrunched my eyes shut in an effort to stop crying and make myself appear stronger than I actually was. I wasn't prepared when I saw him on down on one foot in front me.
"Zoya Siddiqui, I didn't want to scare you by doing this so early. Especially when our past has been thrown in our face every day. But I've fallen deeply in love you. And I want to be there for every moment of our child's life. Every minute, every second. I want to be there when she takes her first steps, when she says papa for the first time. But I want to do it all with you, as your husband too...will you marry me?"
I never thought I'd see the day when Aditya Hooda would tear up in front of me. That too while I was crying.
"Yes...yes! A million times yes."
He got up and placed a soft kiss on my forehead, reminding me that of his constant affection.
**
"Adiii! Why are we on the terrace! I want to sleep! reminding him that we had quite an important event tomorrow...also known as a wedding'."
"Ohooo Zoya stop spoiling the fun as well."
He pulled out a box revealing a solitaire ring and a golden baby bracelet.
"I wanted to do this right and I wanted to let you know I'm not just making a promise to you, but to our a future baby as well. That her life will be as bright and colorful as she has made ours.
I teared up watching Aditya's overwhelming concern for me and our baby every day. He placed the solitaire around my ring finger and a hand over my barely noticeable bump, where our symbol of love was resting.
"Sorry baby, you'll have to wait a bit for your gift. But come quickly, mumma and papa can't wait to meet you."
"Adi, how do you know it'll be a 'she'?"
"I just know, my love, I just know..."
**
The pain was excruciating. It felt as if my body was being ripped apart. I felt the beads of sweat leak into my eyes, slightly blurring my vision. In between consciousness and the overwhelming urge to give up, I saw him holding my hand asking me to take deep breaths as the doctor reminded me to keep pushing. I couldn't do it anymore.
"Aditya...I can't..."
"Just one final time, my love. And she'll be here."
And he was right. The last push that drained the living force out of me also brought the sound of a sweet cry to my ears. The doctor immediately removed her to wipe her down before placing her in my arms. Her arms wailing in front of me in an effort to touch my face. Her crying stopped. She was the most beautiful being I had ever seen. Half me and half my Aditya. The perfect combination, her little button nose and her wide eyes ready to explore everything around her stole my heart.
"Hi little one, I am your mumma.
"And I'm your papa! came Aditya's voice as he placed a kiss on her forehead, while she laid still in my arms.
"Thank you for being so strong. I love you. He whispered in my ears.
Aditya sensed my weakness but unwillingness to give our little one back to the nurse so he cradled her in his arms and started a conversation with her as if she understood everything.
"What will we name her? He asked. "We haven't even decided yet.
"Aditi...Aditya ke adit se Aditi. I smiled. "I want her to be just like her papa, badmaash but loveable.
Aditya smiled back at me. "You're not so bad yourself, my love. Don't worry, our son will be like you!
He looked back at our precious bundle of joy and cooed with her "Thank you for choosing us to be your parents, Aditi. You are the best thing that ever happened to me, after mumma of course!
Just as I ventured into my thoughts, both of our families bursted in the room taking turns holding Aditi, astonished by her. I laughed on as Arjun and Noor debated if they were going to be Chacha-Chachi or Khala-Khalu. Just as Abbu whispered the azaan in her ears, Ammi and Maa came rushing to my side with a bunch of tonics meant for me to nurse Aditi properly. Papa even distributed sweets to the whole hospital.
This was all I ever wanted and much more. I smiled and shared a quiet moment with Aditya. I knew what he understood the tears of happiness in my eyes. We had been through hell and back at a very young age in our lives. Just when we thought things couldn't get worse, they always did to test our patience. I thought back to when I first saw Yash and Pooja's corpses. When I first saw Aditya as Pooja's husband. When Aditya used my own touch logic against me, little did I know I would actually be his.
As I watched Aditya cradle a happy Aditi, everything suddenly made sense. Yash and Pooja made sense. All the deception made sense. Love made sense. In that moment, I felt no hate, anger or regret, but rather gratitude to them. I had to meet Yash because I was destined to love Aditya. We were destined to be Aditi's parents. Never in a million years did I think I would live a life as happy as this with my little family.
Aditya brought over his darling daughter and started telling me which features she retained from me, behaving like a kid in a candy store. Her jovial face was soon replaced by a discomforting cry, indicating her hunger. Adi looked at me clueless as I extended my arms, asking him to hand Aditi to me so I could feed her.
As her hunger was satiated, she returned to being the happy baby she was. Aditya came over and engulfed both of us in his arms, giving us that feel of completeness. And I fell in love all over again...
comment:
p_commentcount