Hola! Hola!
So I'll admit that I don't really get Aru's open display of rudeness, especially towards Saanvi. I can overlook it as part of her immaturity. But considering her inherent nature, I thought a slow, simmering Aru, who would handle the situation in a different fashion would have been a better fit. But of course, the CVs know their characters best. And I also know that she has immense self respect (evident from the way she tried to keep her personal and professional life separate when Mukhi and her family were together in the Dharamshala. She needs no one's pity or sympathy) and though she may make mistakes, once she sees the light, she always works to right things with unfailing persistence. It has always bothered me that they showed her casually making promises to Mishri about not leaving her bhaila alone when she was making plans to leave asap. So I wanted to tie all of that in to the current situation and that is where the idea for this OS came from.
As always, let me know how you liked it/hated it!
Cheers,
Neet
||ArMu OS Love And Its Follies||
These feelings were so new, so different from anything she'd experienced before. Jealousy was an emotion she'd never experienced in her life. But watching Mukhiji give more importance to the sweets Saanvi made, watching him feed that first bite of cake that she'd made so painstakingly for him to Saanvi, she'd had an overwhelming urge to snatch the cake from him and throw it away. How insensitive could he get? She wondered, tears of jealousy, frustration and heartbreak streaming down her face as she forcefully removed the bangles from her hand, bruising her hand in the process but that pain was nothing compared to the pain in her heart. How had he become so important in her life? One word, one kind gesture or even a loving gaze from him would brighten her day. And then, there were moments like today, when he didn't appreciate her efforts to look pretty for him or even the effort she'd put in to make the day extra special for him and she felt she was writhing in unbearable agony. This wasn't how she'd imagined her life to be. It was this village, she decided angrily. She'd been stuck here for way too long. And as it is, Mukhiji was all better now. If he had any more recovering to do then he had his Saanvi by his side to look after him. Why should she worry? Saanvi was, by all means, a better fit for him anyways. She had known from the start that this relationship was headed nowhere. Then why was she so upset? Why did it hurt so much?
He knew it too. He was still very much aware of the reality of their marriage. He seemed so eager to get rid of her. It was just she who'd gotten carried away by his niceness, his caring, his protectiveness, falling in love even with his quirks. She slumped onto the bed as the realization hit. It hurt so much because she loved him. Somewhere along the way, she'd taken him to be the one for her. But she was a fool. An absolute fool. She wouldn't continue making a fool of herself by staying here anymore. Before she left though, she had to keep the promise she'd made Mishri. That her bhaila wouldn't be left alone. And if that meant breaking her heart as she watched Mukhiji and Saanvi together, she was willing to do that as well. Aru wiped away her tears determinedly and headed to the bathroom.
The guests had kept him occupied and though he'd wanted to follow Aru as soon as he saw her leaving the party, he hadn't been able to. She hadn't even eaten cake yet so he'd asked Mastana to save a slice for her. Now he was headed to his room, cake in hand, thinking of what would be the best way to thank her. When he walked into the room, he was met with a sight he wasn't prepared for. Gaurani was packing her bags.
"Ae Gaurani! What are you doing?" He asked confused. She did not dare to meet his gaze for the fear of breaking down, "woh.. actually.. I was thinking.. since you've pretty much recovered now, I don't think you need me here anymore. I should go back home." To say he was shocked was an understatement. Gaurani was going back home? He had always known this day would come but he realized he would never be fully ready for it. There was also a part of him that told him that something wasn't right. She was staunchly avoiding meeting his gaze and whenever she did that he knew she was trying to hide something.
"Why the sudden urgency to leave? Your tickets aren't till next week," Mukhi asked concerned.
"I.. I.. " Aru kept walking back and forth between the cupboard and the bed where her suitcase lay open and half filled. She should've prepared herself some more for this moment, she thought as she scrambled to find a good enough excuse. "I wanted this to be your surprise birthday gift. I don't need to go by AC coach. I'll get tickets for the regular coach," she finally said, trying to wipe away the tears without him seeing. "Ab aapko hamesha ke liye mujhse chhutkara mil jaayega," she plastered a fake smile as she turned towards him. She could barely meet his gaze for a fleeting second though before looking away again.
There most definitely was something wrong, Mukhi understood. He set the plate with the cake aside and went to her. He turned her around towards him. When she still refused to look at him, he placed his finger under her chin and tilted her face towards him. Her face was tear stained and though she still wasn't looking at him, her reddened eyes gave away that she'd been crying.
"What's the matter Gaurani? You are definitely hiding something from me. Tu mujhse nazarein kyun nahi mila rahi?" He asked calmly, trying to think past the painful thudding of his heart. "There's nothing like that Mukhiji," she said. "If I ask something of you, will you give it to me?"
"Gaurani, I've told you before. Whatever is mine, is yours too. You don't even have to ask me if you need something," Mukhi replied.
The painful lump in her throats was getting increasingly hard to suppress, Aru found out as she struggled to speak. "Promise me that after I leave, you will move on in your life with Saanvi." Mukhi had a look of stunned disbelief on his face and before her courage left her, Aru quickly said whatever she had to say, "you don't have to say anything Mukhiji. I understand. You've been childhood friends. There's probably no one who understands you better than her. She cares for you, looks after you, knows your likes and dislikes.. actually, she's the perfect fit for you." Aru laughed nervously, "I know you were supposed to get married to her 15 years ago but that didn't happen, for whatever reason. But now, there's nothing stopping you from accepting your love and happiness back in your life. I really don't know why anyone didn't think of it before. Khair, maybe this was how things were meant to be. And don't worry about me, I'll be fine. I'll just head back home to Mummy Pappa and I'll be fine." She turned away from him again and struggled to stop the tears from falling.
Just like that, everything fell into place for Mukhi. So that's why Gaurani was upset, he realized. Because she thought that he had feelings for Saanvi. Because he'd eaten the sweets Saanvi brought before cutting the cake Gaurani had made, and because he'd fed the first slice of cake to Saanvi, which is also why the Gaurani had left the function right after the cake cutting. How foolish could she be? How could she even think that there was something between Saanvi and him? But more importantly, was that the reason for the tears in her eyes? Was that so painful for her that she decided to leave?
He caught hold of her hand and she hissed in pain from the bruises she got while taking her bangles off. He sat her down and blowed gently on her hand as he applied ointment.
"You've been with me for so long and this is all you know of me?" Mukhi asked her. Aru looked at him, wondering what he was getting at. There was so much hurt in her eyes that Mukhi felt the pain in his heart. "Tujhe lagta hai main ek dhokebaaz hoon?" He asked. "Nahi Mukhiji! Maine aisa kab kaha?" Aru asked surprised. "That's what this means right? If I've had feelings for Saanvi and I still agreed to get married to someone else? I'm married to you now, even though its namesake, and just a facade for the world, if I am married and I'm still harboring feelings for Saanvi, what does that make me Gaurani?" "I definitely did not mean that Mukhiji!" Aru tried to explain but Mukhiji cut her off by raising his hand asking her to stop. "It's true! It's true that Saanvi and I are childhood friends, it's true that at one point we were going to get married. And the wedding was fixed with my wholehearted approval. What's better than getting your best friend as your life partner? But the marriage did not have Saanvi's approval. She loved someone else and when I found out the truth, I made sure she married the person she loved. That caused a long lasting friction between our families. But my best friend's happiness meant more to me. The day I found out Saanvi loved someone else, any other feelings that I might have had for her died away." He finished applying the ointment and stood up to walk away. She stood up too following him. "Does this mean.. does this mean that you don't love Saanvi now?" Aru asked hesitantly.
Mukhi turned to look her in the eye as he replied, " No." There wasn't even a second of hesitation before he replied firmly and all of Aru's fears melted away. A relief so overwhelming washed over her that she ran straight into his arms and crashed against his chest, crying happy tears.
Mukhi resisted the urge to hug her back. Having her in the closed circle of his arms had become such a regular thing for them that neither of them felt the slightest of awkwardness anymore. What was stopping him now was the sight of her packed suitcase, a reminder that he couldn't get himself too entangled with her. Their journey together would only be a short one, and the more he let himself fall under her spell, the more it would hurt when she left.
"Don't worry. I will get your tickets booked for tomorrow," Mukhi said as he pulled away from her. And just like that all her pain came back. She caught Mukhi's hand before he left the room. Her father had always told her to follow her heart, without fear of consequences, and to always place love higher than any other emotion. She'd made it through her toughest times following his advice. And today, she was going to make the biggest decision of her life, once again, with his advice.
"Mukhiji.." her voice came out much more confident than how she actually felt inside. Mukhi turned to look at her. She met and held his gaze, a strange strength permeating her being. "There is something I need to tell you." The pause she took seemed to stretch to eternity as she sought the right words in her mind to explain her feelings. "What is it?" Mukhi asked.
"Main.. Main aapse pyar karti hoon," Aru stated, her gaze unwavering and her hold on his hand still sure and strong.
He felt his heart plummet down to the pit of his stomach as her words registered in his mind. "Kya kaha tu ne?" He asked in disbelief.
"Main aapse pyaar karti hoon," she repeated. "And that's the reason why I couldn't stand seeing you with Saanvi. That's the reason why I was thankful and overjoyed when Ramiben said she could get a ticket only for a week later, because it meant I could be with you for a little while longer! For the past two days I've been doing crazy things just to get you to look at me. I've gone out of mind thinking about you, and wanting to be with you all the time!"
His first reaction had been disbelief, then came joy, unbidden, unbound, overwhelming joy. With the joy came a strong tide of emotions of wanting her back in his arms, wanting to keep her there for the rest of their lives, of wanting to let go of everything that held them back from being with each other. His brain clicked back into place at just that moment, reminding him of all the reasons this wasn't right. She was half is age, a girl with ambitions, dreams and the drive to achieve them all. He had nothing to offer her except his love. And that wouldn't be enough. He turned away from her.
"Yeh tu kya keh rahi hai Gaurani? Aisa nahi ho sakta," he said.
She did not know how she'd expected him to react, but this reaction surely did not seem to fit the bill. But she had never been one to give up. And she most definitely would not give up this time. "Kyun Mukhiji? Aisa kyun nahi ho sakta?" She asked angrily.
"Are you even listening to yourself? Have you forgotten who we are and how we are in this situation? You are 21 years old Aru! I am 42! I am twice your age!" Mukhi tried to reason with her. "How does that make a difference Mukhiji? I'm in love with the person you are, what does your age have anything to do with this?" Aru asked. "You are still young. You have dreams and hopes and the drive to achieve it all. You'll get nothing being with me!" He argued. "My dreams and hopes are still alive Mukhiji," Aru replied, "but they'd mean so much more if I had you by my side."
Why won't this girl understand! Mukhi thought frustrated. "Listen Aru. You are young and at your age, it's very common to get such infatuations. We've been living together for a while now, we've made space for each other in our lives. Ek doosre ki aadat padh gayi hai. But when you go back to Ahmedabad, you will realize that that's all this was. A passing phase."
"Mukhiji, I know what you think of me. That I'm immature, childish, crazy and insensible," Aru replied. "But what you are forgetting is that I am also a woman. I may not have seen the world as much as you have. But I do know what I feel. And it's not infatuation. I've lived in the city all these years Mukhiji. I studied in a coed school and college. I've interacted and worked with men of all ages as part of work. And I've never felt anything for them. Main jaanthi hoon ki aapko lagta hai ki mujhme bahut bachpana hai but I'm not the kind of girl, Mukhiji, to fall in love with the first guy who is nice to me," the underlying hurt in her voice did not go unnoticed by Mukhi. He started to say something but she stopped him this time.
"I don't need you to accept my feelings Mukhiji. All I am asking is that you don't insult them," she said, tears flowing down her eyes.
He stepped forward to wipe away her tears but stopped himself. "Gaurani, you know that I respect you. And I also respect your dreams. Your place is in the city. Why don't you understand? I am not right for you. Our thoughts, our lifestyles - it's all so different!"
"And yet we've managed to make space for each other in our lives in all these days, right?" Aru asked. Mukhi had no answer.
Aru took a deep breath to calm her thundering heartbeats before she spoke again, "I only have one question for you, Mukhiji. Just for a moment, forget that I'm 21 years old and you are 42. Forget that I was born and raised in the city. Forget that my dreams were based in the city. Forget everything else and just see me as a woman.. a woman telling you that she loves you." She paused again and the silence stretched with tension.
"Kya aap mujhse pyaar karte hain, Mukhiji?"
His world seemed to come to an absolute standstill. He knew the answer right away. He loved her. But all his life, he had never given himself the freedom to love. He had always bound himself with the expectations of others, caring for others, placing others before himself. And now this Gaurani was asking him to forget everything else, see her just for the woman she was and tell her whether he loved her or not. He'd never lied in his life and she deserved the truth. But he couldn't say the truth. So he turned away and walked out of the room.
He wasn't saying anything but his eyes told her everything. He did love her. She could see it as clear as day in his eyes. He looked away and before she could stop him, he quickly left the room.
"Apne bhale hi kuch nahi kaha Mukhiji lekin aapki aankhein.. aapki aankhon ne sab kuch batha diya," Aru spoke softly to his retreating frame. She smiled a happy smile as she turned back to her suitcase and started unpacking. Her eyes fell on the train ticket lying by the nightstand, "Five days.. I have five days left with you and I promise you, that in these five days, I'll convince you of my love for you and have you confess that you love me too. Watch out Mukhiji!! And if that doesn't happen.." Aru paused, picking up the train ticket. She shook her head, "no! Arundhati Nanavati.. she paused, "Arundhati Raidhan Raj Katara never loses a challenge, and I most definitely will not lose this one!" With that, she tore away the train tickets and tossed them in the trash.
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