Shattered. [FF|Rudra. Soumya. OBros] - updated: page.5

Walking on the shattered pieces...
...of our relationship.

0 - Prologue.

Getting close to Rudra had never been part of the plan.

Marriage. Attachments. Never crossed her mind.

And yet...

"What would you do to someone who'd take your brothers from you?"

She had taken his momentum from him, Soumya could see it in the way he quickly closed his mouth and pressed down on the roll he had been nervously moving from one hand to the other. A paratha. Confusion flickered over his features, a gentle break into the forced mask of confidence. He was always open like this with many of his emotions. Inviting others to come and have a good look at what was going on inside of him. Very reckless.

Soumya leaned forward in the chair, placed her elbows on the small, round table and rested her chin on the backs of her folded hands. She let her gaze wander over candles in the middle of the table, casting a reddish glow on the surface through their glasses. Then, she took in the empty rooftop, a wry smile tugging at her lips. You'd think a Rudra Singh Oberoi would choose a very cheesy way to confess, not atop a hospital, of all places. But then, he loved it to catch her off-guard, didn't he?

Besides, he's not going to confess.

"What kind of question is that?"

She shrugged. "An honest one. I am curious."

Rudra frowned, his left brow falling lower than the right one. "I-I don't know."

He really didn't. His eyes said as much. It was a scenario he had never truly considered, probably too surreal for him to be bothered by. But wasn't it the same for everyone? Even she had never thought about her brother being snatched from her. And when he had been, a bottomless pit opened in front of her, inviting her to lose herself completely to her grief. Immense grief that bore the fruits of equally immense hatred. Something that, up till then, she had never believed to be capable of. Maybe she wasn't completely able to, unlike her oldest sister, and that was why she had almost stumbled into the trap of other feelings. No, that wasn't exactly right. She was always toeing those lines.

"Surely..." Soumya tilted her head so that her check was pressed down on her knuckles. It was chilly, tonight. She shouldn't have taken off her coat. "Surely you would hate them, wouldn't you?"

"Hate?" Rudra let go of the roll and stared at it thoughtfully. "I-" He lifted his left shoulder uneasily as he locked gazes with her. "If anyone were to harm my brothers, I wouldn't ever forgive them."

There was an unpleasant twist in her chest. "And if they have reasons to do it?"

"Everyone has reasons," Rudra murmured, all traces of softness and ease gone from his voice. Moments earlier, they had been conversing lightly, still giddy from a movie night out, and now, heaviness weight down on them. "But that doesn't mean they will matter to me when it comes to my brothers."

She smiled. It hurt. Always brothers. "Does not forgiving equal hating?"

"Probably. But, really, why are you saying such weird things?"

"Curiosity." Testing the waters. She wasn't going to change her mind no matter what he said but she had needed to know. That small foolish part of hers that was attached wanted to know how far she could go and still, expect salvation. Of course, the answer didn't surprise her. "If it happened to me, I'd never stop hating the culprits."

Her mother and Svetlana Di were more invested in seeking revenge for her father's murder. Soumya wasn't indifferent to her father and how much they had struggled after him but she barely remembered the man. Her brother, on the other hand... And that's one things I can't forgive. She had forgiven Rudra for everything he had apologized for- although, not everything had needed an apology because, unknowingly, Rudra had been right.

But that one thing. You survived. Bhaiyya didn't.

She stood up, abruptly. "Remember the last thing you told me at the airport, back then?"

He flinched as if she had hit him. Averting his gaze, he mumbled, "Why? I thought we cleared that."

"Yes, because I proved you wrong." She paused before adding, "Didn't I?" He had told her that she wasn't his equal, not his needed Ishqbazi - feelings might not have been a part of her initial plans, but the challenge thrown her way had made them an intricate thread in this web she was still weaving around the Oberois. But she wasn't completely heartless.

"I don't think there was ever anything to prove," Rudra smiled at her, that smile which was crooked at the edges, so open and sincere. Transparent. Stop doing that.

She nodded thoughtfully, grabbed her coat from the back of the chair and started to walk past their table. "Are you coming?"

He didn't stop her, and she felt a small weight lift from her shoulders. It was better this way, without any confessions lingering between them - or hanging over her head like a Damocles sword. Maybe he wouldn't feel that horrible with the certainty that he had never voiced his heart. Small mercies, right?

*

"Get a grip on yourself, Om!"

"You don't understand, Shivaay! I could- I could have... if I wanted to- he would be alive! But Rudra was there and I just- couldn't think beyond that!"

"And you shouldn't have, either. Now, let's go before anyone sees us."