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Ouch! my head hurts.. feels heavy, as if burdened with a bag of sand. Tumultuous day, it has been, no less than a wild roller coaster ride. The tough morning, that incessant out pour of uncontrollable tears, that vivid thought of Nachiket adorning the ring on Nivedita's 'finger, never leaving once! I cried, I prayed, I shared, I worked, I ran.. but the storm in me wouldnt slacken. Finally I sought peace, on the mountain top, I was blank and hollowness stood in front.
Was today real or was it just another crazy dream, I wonder as I ascend the stairs to my apartment, Nachiket driving off in the background. Thought of Nachiket, lightens my head for a moment, but Ouch! it still hurts. The prayers were answered on the mountain top, the phone had unexpectedly buzzed. My heart throbbed harder, as his voice reached my ears. "I am coming to see you", is all I remember.
Uncertainty ruled my restless wait, but the slight hope, emanated from those few words exchanged, lingered on. And then, after, what seemed like hours, he appeared... he was there... and the rest was a most beautiful dream.
Ouch! I grab the frame of the door, wobbling and giddy. The door opened on slight knock, I walked, I knew not for the moment where I was...
Cold water splashed the face and that blessed moment on that hill top came rushing back to me, so clearly, so vibrantly.. in front of the mirror, I stood. Next few rigorous splashes, magically wash away my tiredness, the coolness refreshing and reviving...
My eyes catch me in the mirror, as the towel gently pats down, gradually revealing the freshness beneath, I feel pure, I feel at rest. The lips automatically curl up bit by bit, deepening the dimples and the face lights up bright!
"Yeh kya hai?", the conscious questioned, as if it had seen the first smile ever.. "hmm.. hmm... Nachiket", reply the lowering eyes, before the hands swiftly move to cover up the radiating glow.
"Nachiket", his name echoes in my ears, as I step out, still clutching on to the towel tightly in a hug.. swaying, humming to a known- unknown tune..
Dil ke chaman ka hasna toh dekho
Jaage nazar ka sapna toh dekho...
Check check, reality check.. "Real is it? that warmest longest hug? Nachiket was it? " - conscious sounded again..
"Nah Dream!", teased the other self.. Dream.. Dream is what has rolled into my life.. my only dream..Was reality a dream or dream a reality, when I was in his arms? Or have they both converged into one, by his warmth? The heart rejoiced with profound contentment.. "Main tumhara intezaar karoonga, wahi pe jahan tum mera intezaar karti thi", his words from earlier on the phone, echoed in a hoarse voice from the walls, I turn around impulsively looking for the source.. "Dhat!", pat the fingers on the forehead. "Yeh mujhe kya hogaya hai?", I barely mumble fighting back the smile stuck on my lips..
Letting out a deep sigh, I settle at the edge of the bed, attempting to calm down the butterflies in my stomach. A giggle escapes.. very tickle-ish are these. Cold hands attempt to cup the pink warm face - an electrifying shiver runs down rising the goosebumps all over.. I feel cold.. my feet tingle.. shawl, is what I need. As I take a step forth, "Miss me alright!", sounded the same voice, from the corner.. I shake my head this time, as his touch from when he said good bye after dropping off comes alive.. I flinch, and the eyes close tight, attempting to grab the sensation of his fingers on me... Twirling a bang of hair on the finger I feel the butterflies triple..
"You are not sixteen!" sounded the conscious again. The smile frowns, it was true.
Briskly I fly towards the mirror, to ensure I was presentable, The reflection questioned. "Kya Nachiket sach hai?", and the cheeks instantly answered, turning deep red. In a distant sounded a melody on the radio, "Tinke ki tarah mein beh nikli.. sailaab mere roke na ruka... sailaab mere roke na ruka", "aaha ha, o ho ho oo ho ho", hummed the chest, rhythmically heaving to the song.. The glittering eyes, grew wider.. "really Ragini? itna pagalpan?", they seem to ask.. "joonoon", answered the heart that had seen the light of happiness after years of penance.
The warmth of the hug from that afternoon came gushing into me, and the eyes closed to experience it all over again.. A strange sense of peace engulfed and I could feel my, knees go weak. Ouch! I stumbled on to the chair near by. "Sambhalke", sounded the same hoarse voice..
knock knock sounded the door.. "Beta khana lag gaya hai", announced mom. "haaan?", I looked up questioning, taking a moment to figure where I was and who it was. "Tum theek toh ho na beta?", mom inquired with concern.. "haan ma, woh sar mein thoda dard tha bas", I manage to say, pulling the reins of my racing heart. "khana khake, dawai le lena ", suggested mom. "Ab nahi kar raha hai", rolled out impulsively, as the smile threatened to come back. Mom shook her head in confusion and awe, staring at the silliness of her daughter. "Abhi aati hoon..", I reply, as casually as possible.. holding to my breathe. Mom walks away, simply nodding..
Letting out a deep sigh, the hands spank my head.. "Kya jawab deti main?Pagal ho rahi hoon? Kya ho gaya hai mujhe?", she rebuked herself... "Nachiket.. Nachiket", whispered every little thing in the room..
Ragini rejoiced...
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