Excuse For My Living
(Part - 1)
"Forever and always, I would stay by your side just like today. And that is a promise." a calm and friendly sweet voice spoke.
"Indeed you will." Said another melodious voice in a teasing tone. "I will not let you run off to anywhere leaving me behind, after all you promised. I will cling on to you from every day now."
She pulled the girl to a hug as if she would never let her go. She opened her eyes and shortly realized that she is all alone. The girl who promised her to always stay by her side had already disappeared. She unhugged herself and looked at the arms that embraced her. They were all red. She stared at the white laced top she had worn. To her dismay it was drenched in blood. The dress clenched to her body accusing her for being the culprit. As the realization struck her, the beautiful grey-green eyes of hers had started to well up and tears had started sliding down rolling across her rosy cheeks. Her soft sobs started getting louder and louder.
"No. Noo..!! Nnnoo!!" she screamed out loud.
"Sanyu, Sanyyuu!!" a voice called her. The old lady shook the sleeping girl by her shoulders. Suddenly she opened her eyes in shock and was panting with tears streaming down from the sides of her face. She looked at the old lady who was sitting beside holding her. Her forehead was furrowed with lines of tension. Her eyes were teary and was full of concern. The delicate girl sat up in her bed and wiped the flowing tears with her tiny palms. She cupped the old lady's face and gave her a forged smile.
Madhura Agarwal was known for leading the famous Agrawal Industries despite of her old age. Her success was witnessed by the whole of India. She has numerous number of branches allocated over the world. She had constantly managed to be in the top ten leading companies in India of all times. She had to retake over the company after her son Kishore Agarwal and her daughter in law Anju Agarwal had met with a tragic accident making her doted grandchild an orphan at the age of ten. Starting from then she had tried her best to give all the love and care Sanyukta was deprived of. That child had become her motivation after the loss of her beloved children.
"My lovely Dadi, you didn't sleep yet" Sanyu asked her grandmother.
"I was sleeping Sanyu, but your screams woke me up. Did you have a nightmare again?" she asked while handing her a glass of water from her bedside table.
"Oh my god Dadi, you look so worried. I am completely fine, I just happened to have a small tiny nightmare. That's all... Now stop being so worried or else your blood pressure will again rise." Replied back the girl just before gulping down a mouthful of water.
She pulled her grandchild in to a tight hug, stroking her hair carefully controlling her tears. She understood the forced smile on her face. She knew that Sanyu was worried for her health. These were the same nightmares that have been haunting her from the past two years. This has been her condition nearly every night after the misfortune had occurred and here she is witnessing the screams and cries of her nightmares virtually every night. She knew it was better not to mention about it so she just let it slide.
"It's okay dear. Why don't you try getting back some sleep? It's still 2:30 am." She said as she released her from the hug and looked at the big round antique clock hanging on the wall right above the bed.
"Yes I will, and Dadi you too should get some sleep. Am sure that you will be the first to wake up tomorrow as usual." She gave a wink to Dadi trying to lift up the mood.
Dadi gave her a hug once again and a kiss on her forehead before she left the room closing the door with almost no noise. The girl lied down on her bed. She kept on tossing from one side to another of the bed trying to get some sleep. In the end she gave up and sat on the bed, leaning toward the headboard. She rested her head on the bedhead and closed her eyes. Flashbacks of her life and the tragedy continuously had kept crawling back to her. She opened her eyes in a fidget not wanting to remember any of it. But she knew this was of no help, how hard may she ever try. No matter whatever she does her memories do catch up to her taking the peace of her mind. After all memories cannot be controlled, stopped or suppressed.
She got up from her bed and covered herself with a shawl casing her shoulders from her sleeveless long silky night gown. She opened the first drawer of her bed side table and took a red leathered book. She walked to the right side of her room and opened the balcony door. The balcony was big and sheltered. There were yellow lights structured on the wall, two on each side. The wall was painted with purple and white. It was designed by her best friend. It was their chatting place. She looked at the big white marble tiles covering the floor. The outer side of the balcony was decorated with orchid flower pots lining from the sides. It looked like a garden of roses and orchids. The rose flower pots were hanged in midair right after one gap of an orchid pot. How can ever forget, roses were her favourite and orchids were mine.
Her gaze fell on both the red chaise long chairs bordered with black wood that were kept opposite to one another with a glass table in the middle. She went and touched one of the initials that were carved on to one chair. She caressed it slowly as if it would break any moment. She leaned on the chair as if she was trying to feel her presence. Finally she released the brown straps that held the red leather cover to the pages, took the pen and started to write.
Dear Idhu,
Once again I am here, sitting on your throne and writing you my inner collisions. You are the only one who had understood my grief. Since now you are not there whom am I supposed to share it with? As you said, you would never let me forget you. Trust me, you have really lived up to your word. Today again I met you, in my fantastical land. I was glad even if it was for a moment until you disappeared with blood all over my body. Just like the same way you left me five years ago...
She continued to write her grief in words as tears dripped to the pages, some words smudged but still readable.
Edited by Eems - 9 years ago
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