Dear Diary,
My eyes became teary as I saw his image fading away from my eyes. He turned around one last time, waved a goodbye and left. That very day he left my small little world and me. I was standing at the airport still crying but he had moved on happily and I knew now it was turn for me. It's surprising how the exit of even one person from your life can change your world in just a matter of seconds. Today whatever I am, I owe everything to him. Being the topmost designer in the Indian fashion industry is definitely not a game of peanuts. I had to struggle day and night to reach where I am today. But if it had not been him, I would have still been that small little snobbish child who just knew how to take things lightly in life and of course play around with Daddy's money. Today, I stand strong to lead my life on my own terms; I stand here in my office as one independent t girl who doesn't need the support of anyone anymore. It's hard for me to believe he is the very same guy I knew a time back. Swayam Shekhwat, my brother as well as my best friend in crime. We may not have been related by blood but our relationship was no less than that of siblings. While he would call my mom, ma I would call his dad, papa. It had always been like that; we would play basketball together, eat together and even listen to grandmas' tales together. He would always take the scolding of my share and wouldn't even let a tear escape my eye. He was my best friend, my Swayam. It was soon we grew up and our priorities in life changed. While he became a more focused man I remained the same, fooling around with guys and playing pranks here and there. He would always accompany me but now it was always I who was blamed. He even now had a girlfriend to himself. Renesa, yes that was her name and even his first priority in life. They shared a long distance relationship as he had met her 3 years back when he had gone to London for some 1-year workshop. He even forced me to meet her and I can't deny the fact, she was gorgeous. Not gorgeous, but she had everything a guy would look for in a girl; a perfect figure, voice like a nightingale, the amazing gleaming eyes, the perfectly toned legs, a heart made of gold and last but not the least, someone who was focused in life. She had done her MBBS and her dream was to be a surgeon at one of the leading hospitals at London. Big, isn't it?
It had not been 4 years back; I had started developing a feeling of liking towards Swayam. While he would just look at me as a friend I could not help but think of him as someone special to me. I would always want his full attention to myself, talk to him, play around with him and hang around with him. The first year was all cool. it was all the same. We would have all the fun together, he would devote half his day to studies and spend the rest half with me. The time he would study I would be busy watching a movie, thinking about him or go shopping. Studies was always given the last priority in my life because for one thing I knew, it would never get inside my brain. It was soon the Howards University for a 1-year workshop out there in London called him. I was sad but at the same time happy for him. I thought about telling him about my feelings that had now grown immensely strong by then but then I released it would not only destroy our friendship but even put both our families in awkward terms. I let him go thinking maybe, maybe when he comes I'll be able to confess. He came back but with a pile of good news following behind him. He told me about his girlfriend Renesa that left me shattered into pieces. To add it all he said he would shift to London in another 2 years to stay there and work there. He wanted to do something big and settle out there with obviously his girlfriend. Since that very day, our relationship changed. He didn't spend that much time with me. Usually he would be busy mugging up stuff from his books or doing Skype with Renesa. We would at max just spend about an hour a day. It used to kill me from within to see myself loosing him but at that point of time, I was helpless. Every minute, every second my feeling would grow but our connections would just fade. Soon it was time for him to leave for London. Though we didn't remain that close but still the fact that I may hardly ever get to see him ate me up form within. I locked myself an entire day in the room crying my heart out and not even touching a piece of grain. The next day before leaving he gave a knock on my door. I opened it and found him standing outside my room all set to leave. He gave me a last goodbye hug and a small kiss of respect on my forehead. " I will miss you Sharon" with that he turned to leave. I stood there not having my senses to react to anything happening around me. My eyes were baggy due to lack of sleep and my face had gone pale. But at that point of time, nothing bothered me. " I want to come with you to the airport" I managed to mutter before he left my place. He didn't say much, but just walked till the car. We both left for the airport. We didn't speak a word out in the entire journey. After reaching the airport, we walked till the gate. It was finally time for him to leave. He still didn't say a word , just a hug and there he left me here all alone. That very day was the day I will not regret my entire life. Simply because that day was the day that taught me morals of this world. That I can't just be what I was. That very day taught me that I had to work hard in order to survive in this world; I had to make my presence be felt and for people to realize my value. And now, I can proudly say I am Sharon Raiprakash, the bets qualified designer one can find in India. I'm proud of myself , so is my family. Though my feelings for Swayam still haven't faded and neither will ever but there is always going to be that slight faith within me that he is going to come back me, and he loves me.
Yours,
Sharon
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