One last time - Rabba Ve SG's!!
The final cigar has been smoked, the fat lady has sung, the shit has hit not just the fan but the entire central air conditioning system, and IPK has pretty much died a gory death, kinda like our hopes for it. 🥺
RIP - IPK. You will be missed for the history you could have created in desi soapdom as a truly different show, but for CV's with their heads stuck up their ample derrieres. 😡 😡 😡
Today's final Take 5 posted from Fort Knox, otherwise known as RM. You know - the place with all that extra security, provided especially by the United States Secret Service. The place where restraining orders are tossed around like confetti, and wills are stuck to the undersides of cribs - like toilet paper stuck to the underside of a shoe.
1. Honey - you wanna check my food before I eat it? Di is wiser than we give her credit for. DB is obviously aware of the fury raging out here in AD, and wants to make sure deranged fans aren't sneaking something into the food.
What better way to check...than to make Daiiya Ho take the first bite? If he doesn't keel over, the food is safe, If he does - she gets the undying gratitude of millions of fans worldwide. This - ladies and the not so ladylike - is what is called shaatir dimaag.
But she needn't have worried. The other inhabitants of the nuthouse are making their way to the RM shrine (otherwise known as Di's room) with their humble offerings to please the true DM of this show.
Will it be accepted? Oh, the trepidation!
2. Hoshiyaar! All hail Her Holiness The Di making her way downstairs! Di decides to grace her devotees with her divine presence at the table. A languid survey of the prasad laid out at her altar, and she decrees that all shalt eat (so they don't give her indigestion by gazing at her without blinking?) - and the nuthouse is at peace again.
Di Maiiya has broken her fast.
Khushi-ji wants Arnav-ji to eat too. But Arnav-ji is absorbing his food through osmosis - the sight of Di eating is enough for him. (what a fantastic idea to lose weight! Weight watchers - did you ever think of this?)
Khushi-ji, on the other hand, is wpndering what Di is smoking. Or snorting. Or (since this is an SP show) just swallowing. But something is not kosher in the pharmacy.
3. Kabhi Khushi, Kabhi Gham. Thank you Nurse, for that expert diagnosis. 😡 See how easy it is to deliver pat answers - why on earth do doctors waste 5 freaking years in med school?
But Khushi-ji smells a rat, and even sees it scurrying out of the house. She then hot-foots it to Arnav-ji to warn him that his biggest enemy is on the premises and is plotting against him. Arnav-ji is overwhelmed with love for her and after they take down the Hulk together - they get down to the serious business of shaadi-ing again.
Say what? 😲 None of that happened? 😲 😲 So sorry - I think I accidentally smoked. Or snorted. Or swallowed. Whatever Di Maiiya is on. 😕
Khushi-ji sees the Hulk and she...wait for it. She. Goes. Home. And inherits the official title of Dimbulb/Dimwit/Dimbrain from Di Maiiya.
Tera kuch nahin hoga - ladki. You just satyanashed the so-called SP nayi soch with this effery. Unless nayi soch really was code for mind numbingly stupid, in which case I stand corrected. Carry on.
4. Shaadi-freaking-360. Please. Don't make me laugh. Or cry. Send Khushi-ji back to Lucknow. Send Arnav-ji to Scotland. Or Vasant Vihar. Or Dariya-ka-ganj for a haircut and shave. Or even off for 11/28/45 days to promote his movie. Whatever.
I don't effing care anymore. I have a decent uncut playlist to remind me of what was.
Hulk and Di can Rabba Ve the poolside until even the termites rebel and vacate the premises.
Dadi can go back to her ashram and start hitting the laxative supply again.
Nani can go back to dancing on Oo-la-la.
Akash can go find a new wife since the current Payaliya finally decided to escape the zoo.
Mami-ji can go do the same for Mamaji.
Nanhe-ji can go Rabba ve with Buaji.
HP (the current one) can go gloat at having lasted way longer than any of his predecessors.
And finally, Laxmi-ji can knock on St. Peter's Gate and ask DM (the real one) - WHAT in the name of all that is Holy, went wrong with this soap??????
5. Dhanyavaad CV's. For the past year.
Will we be back? Only you know the answer to that.
Rabba Ve. Over and Out.
Edited by -Jamba- - 11 years ago
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