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PR is over and Bhavna is dead . While arranging her things to be packed and given to various poor homes ...Her pure silk saris , lipsticks , unopened shopping bags etc etc , people found her diaries in which she has chronicled all the events of her life after son's marraige that led to her eventual sainthood and subsequent death . Today Bhavna is immortal in Dombivli as Saint Bhavna , but one has to read the chronicles to understand HOW Bhavna became a Saint and outshone even Mother Teresa .
Jan 1 { 2009} . Satish has decided to marry that strong headed, wilful sister of Archana . The one who had insulted me on the roads saying I was noway comparable to her sainted mother who was a notch above me . It seems he has fallen in love with her . When , How , and WHY I don't know , but it has happened . He was weeping with his head in my lap , begging me to give permission . I ignored the fact that the neat pleats of my Pure silk Sari [ my purple one from Nalli's } were getting mussed up and stroked my boy's hair helplessly , a queasy sensation forming slowly but surely in my tummy . I tried to point out to Satish That she was neither as good looking as Archana nor good natured like her . Upon which Satish said to me THATS EXACTLY WHY I WANT HER...AS SHE IS SO UNLIKE HER .
I quivered when he said those words . My experience tells me that they forecast DOOM . The skinny Girl , bony as she she is , has turned him on . YES. Thats the ONLY explanation . There is no point in talking to Satish and trying to make him see Reason . Keeping a stone on my heart I have given my permission .
Feb 3 2009 : I returned , flushed with victory , from Satish's engagement to that girl . Had a most uncouth woman thrown out of the party today by putting my foot down , ...that Savita Deshmukh . She was insulting my friend Rasika in the most discourteous way . I really could not bear the chaos and asserted my rights as a samdhan. But I am feeling very very uneasy about the look Varsha gave me after it was done . I have this sick feeling that my authority is about to be challenged . Mohan keeps telling me that its all my imagination but I cannot sleep as I remember Varsha's flashing eyes .
Feb 4 2009 : I was RIGHT . Satish back sassed me today . He feels I was WRONG to get Savita Deshmukh Thrown out . Varsha has filled his ears of course and in his turned on condition [ the poor boy !} he has been convinced . You behaved like a SNOB ...Satish told me, quite rudely , I think . A PERFECT SNOB , MOM . Of course I expressed my displeasure by pressing my lips tight and not saying a word . Opting for his fiancee's uncouth relatives over my polished , carefully cultivated contacts ! I am deeply pained , of course . Mohan advised me to ignore it and focus on not losing Satish altogether . I think he is right .
March 5 2009 : Varsha has entered my life and house as a bahu . I am afraid I have nothing much to say about her . Her first kaam as a bahu has been to to insult Ajit , who is a family friend , and Ashwin , who is my son in law . She makes faces at them , refuses their wishes and presents and dilly dallies while giving them tea or accepting their dinner invitations . Really , I am quite SHOCKED at the awful manners of this girl . Her Mom seems alright where manners r concerned . But the girl ! Why , she actually STOMPS OFF to her room suddenly , in the midst of the conversations ! Ashwin is being most broad minded about it all , the dear boy , but Ajit may take offense . He is SO sensitive . I don't blame him . Why , Varsha THREW , yes THREW , a puranpoli on his plate in a party while serving him food . I caught her red handed in the act . Some particles of puran flew on his lovely pink sherwani . And she looked so UNREPENTANT . OMG I feel quite FAINT really . Mohan insists That I buy one more purple silk sari to make me feel better . Darling Mohan ! How well he knows me !
March 10 2009 : Am lying in bed , suffering from serious palpitations . Have found out today that Varsha had a torrid affair with Ashwin , my son in law . With one hand on my palpitating heart I write these chronicles with the other . Poor Ashwin ! Its not his fault , the girl threw herself on him like anything . Ashwin had to THREATEN her , yes , THREATEN her with FIRING HER FROM THE JOB to get her off his back . The things he told me ! Fastened on him like a vampire it seems . The Dear boy held back on the details of course , respecting my Age and all that . But he hinted at some bills of Victoria's Secrets that she was forcing him to pay . My poor Urmi ! Such hefty bills ! My poor heart ! even the latest Purple Sari that Mohan immediately bought , a genuine Kanjeevaram , fails to make me feel better this time . My poor Satish ! How will I break these horrible news to him !
March 11 2009 : My pillow is wet with tears . Drenched . Mohan is putting on a new silk pillow case on it , a violet shade , to match my sari , but I remain untouched by the happiness it would have once brought me . Satish has REFUSED to believe me ! He says its Ashwin's fault . That it was HE who pursued Varsha ! He refuses to apologise to Urmi ! My palpitations r starting again . My whole family is falling apart within ONE MONTH of marraige to this girl . My dear son , completely under her thumb ! In just one month ! I am sure she is WITHOLDING in bed . Quite Sure . Satish was NEVER like this . Why would dear handsome Ashwin go after this bony temperamental hussy when he can have his pick and has the best looking wife in the world ...My dear URMI ? Surely Satish knows of Ashwin's impeccable taste ? How a woman affects a man's mind ! Truly ! Mohan is SO lucky to have a woman of such impeccable moral rectitude like me ! But my Satish ! What will happen of him with THIS girl as his wife forever ?
March 12 2009 : I experienced hysteria today . I know now what hysteria means . Formerly when I saw it on TV I wondered and wondered how a person could laugh and cry at the same time . Now I know how it is done . WHY i experienced hysteria ? Oh , I quite forgot to tell you that . Remember I had told you I was SURE she was WITHOLDING in the bedroom to get Satish to listen to her ? Well , today I happened to peek in his bedroom coz the dear boy had forgotten to close the door fully and I wanted to see if my supicions were right . Well guess what ! Forget WITHOLDING , the girl has not even CONSUMMATED with my dear son ever since they got married ! Poor Dear Satish sleeps on the couch while she sleeps like a Maharani with a silk quilt on the King Sized Bed that I had bought so lovingly for them as a present ! What ELSE is my Fate gonna reveal to me , HOW MANY MORE SECRETS ! Does she make my son press her legs in the bedroom every night ? Mohan has massaged my temples with eau de cologne and tucked me in with my favorite purple silk quilt and is sitting anxiously in the arm chair besides our bed , hoping I won't go into those dreadful hysterical peals again . The poor pet is worried sick about me . Darling Mohan ! What I would do without him !
March 15 : I have apologised to Varsha for doubting her about Ashwin . Of course I am thoroughly unconvinced still , but I did it for Dear Satish's sake . Mohan advised me to do so . He is gonna take me to Nalli's in the evening for this brave act . It seems Ashwin was the one at fault after all . Some stupid proofs have come up . My heart tells me otherwise . Varsha REFUSED to accept my apology . SO SORRY JUST DON"T FEEL LIKE ACCEPTING IT , she answered flippantly and flounced off , while I quivered . SO humilating . Bending before a chit of a girl at THIS AGE . All for dear Satish of course . I bore it ALL for my son . Mohan looked proudly at me from the corner with a THUMBS UP and showed me a Nalli's Coupon .
March 30 : Varsha has run away to the party in her Mom's house without waiting for me . She took the car by bullying my driver . I had to follow in a rickety old Rickshaw . My make up was completely spoilt by the time I reached the party . Such HEAT ! The rickshaw bumped so much , my Hind side felt quite sore . Archana and Sulochana BOTH asked me courteously what the matter was and Dear Archana got me a glass of chilled sherbet . If only Satish had married this nice girl by listening to me ! I wanted to weep . I overheard Archana trying to talk sense in Varsha and coaxing her to respect me , upon which the rude girl only told her sister DON"T POKE UR NOSE IN MY AFFAIRS . Poor Archana looked defeated . Her own marraige is in a shamlbles ...that Savita Deshmukh [ How right I was in getting her kicked out !} has destroyed her fifteen day old marraige it seems . And here My Dear Satish is unconsummated ! Wah re kismet !
Apri 1 2009 : I and Mohan have decided to move to our Worli Flat . Its better this way . Better than staying in the same house with Varsha and getting more and more alienated from my only son . Why , only yesterday she came and barged in a conversation I was having with Urmi and started calling me all kinds of rude names . I was merely advising the dear girl to think it over before divorcing Ashwin . Was it REALLY worth it . The Divorce , I mean . Over this Varsha . { I am still convinced Dear Ashwin was merely being a gentleman and taking the blame on his head to save Satish's marraige with this dreadful girl .} Well in she stormed and asked me outright if I had an OUNCE OF AKAL that I was advising Urmi thus . Enough is Enough . Before this rudeness escalates and she starts hollering AIE DUMBO ! to me in the house , it's better to move away with whatever dignity is left to WORLI ...even Mohan agrees . Yes I will have to travel quite a bit as all my clubs and social contacts r in this area and I really do NOT like the shopping malls in any other area , but I have my AC Car for that and my purple collection to look at whenever I feel depressed . I end the first Part of my chronicles here , blessing Dear Satish with all Motherly Might . Forgive me my Son , for running out on you . I tried to stay there , I really Did , but Your wife is IMPOSSIBLE . I will now bless u from AFAR .
And Thus ended Chronicle One of Saint Bhavna . Part Two is being rapidly searched for by the people who read this amazing story and want more .
PS : Ignore the dates my Friends . They r All gobbledy Gook .😃
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