Dr.Siddhant Modi Diary
The Dark Prince/Dark Destiny
Italic: This is Sid most important inner thought of sid
This takes place in sid penthouse
Dr. siddhant modi was the master of mischievous, funny, silliness, could be violent if his patient is tested, careless, angry young man who gave a dame what others though about him, who was searching through eternity for a true love of light who will show him the real meaning of love, but he didn't know this true love will be like rose and throne.
Point to be noted: this diary is all about Sid agony and his pain, I don't know if I can do justice with his pain, but I will try my level best; please forgive me if I cannot justice his character like some AT wonderful people, who knows dr.siddhant modi in and out.
Everything was so quiet that even if a pin dropped on the floor you could hear it, candle was light around the room, the light was reflecting all over the room, everything was so still, as if they knew that someone was going through the most devastating pain. The wind stood still as if they were playing simon says. Around the room a man was sitting in his rocking chair, with a diary in his hands and pen, his head was up proudly, his body fiercely hard, aggressively male, his eyes burning with tears.
Sid: why…why…riddhima, I thought you wanted this marriage to happen, you said it yourself that this marriage and me are the only truth and nothing matters in your life anymore, then what I saw today (flashback of the horror scene) tears started to drop from sid eyes, his hands harden like rock and the pen in his hand was digging into his fingers leaving its wounded marks. (today I wanted to start my life with you, just like the day when you wanted to start your life with me in pune, but look what has happen, that day your past came back to you and today when I wanted to start fresh, I saw you with your past in the most distrusting ways, why…did this happen to me, why did I go there to see that horror scene, those scene will hunt me for lifetime riddhima, for eternity).
When I saw you in your ex. arm, I felt like my heart was ripped open one piece at a time, just like a person arm is ripped from their body parts, slow and steady, just like banging you head on a stone over and over again, like a wife is drifted away from their husband soul . It was like lightning hitting me over and over again, and yet I stood there….with my face turned away from you b/c I didn't wanted you to see the pain that I was going through, or it was b/c I didn't wanted to see the horror scene, even if I was looking at you ridz would it matter to you, I don't think so (shaking his head in denial).
Flashback: I told you to come after duty, I will be waiting for you, I wanted to say I am truly sorry for the hurt I cause you, I promise you ridz I will never, never hurt you like this, for god sake I cannot even see you in hurt, it hurts me thousands time more, it will be impossible for me to hurt you riddhima, then how can you ever think that I will hurt you, call me to you riddhima, I will fix the hurt, give you peace, friendship and warmness, I am not asking for love riddhima ,just have a little bit of faith in me and watch what you husband can do for you.
Sid got of from his rocking chair and grabbed a bottle of wine, and sat back, as he drank the wine each sip going through his throat felt like ice water like acid that burned. Ridz voiced echo in his mind, "I will come with you b/c that is my farz as a wife, I will not let you go anywhere alone, where ever you go, I go." Sid threw the bottle in the wall and it broke into pieces leaving it's marks on the wall.
Sid screaming top of his lungs and writing his every thoughts in his diary, "I want to believe in every word that came from your mouth, I want to close my eyes and trust you for forever, I want to put my hand in my heart and think that yes, my wife is with me and always will be, but what I see now is that horror scene riddhima…..I must be the foolest husband right, like a fool I was waiting for you here and when I heard that you were calling my name over and over again, I was not those husband who suspect his wife, I was the Sid who loves his wife and wants to be with his wife when she is in pain, but you made me think like that ridz!! You made me think the wrong way today again, you used me like a toy and threw out of your life as if I was a garbage that would make you sick." He looked over their marriage picture hanging in the wall. (even if I trust you now ridz, how can I make my eyes not see those horror scene, how can I erase those scene which has encompassed in my mind and heart and soul, it has drown me to the end riddhima, it is like acid burning in my heart, how can I reduce that ridz, how….how…how….tell me how riddhima, please tell me, it hurts ridhhima...my heart is hurting ridhhima..tell my heart to stop hurting please (folding his both hands together, sid broke down into crying).
The candle light was throwing shadows on the wall, outside the wind began to rise, and dark, ominous clouds roiled across the moon. Sid eyes were now hot, glowing, burning with fierce, "When you touched me to stop me from going riddhima, for a second I felt so peace like a baby sleeping peacefully, but it over took the horror scene, I don't want to say those words to you riddhima..never, but you left me with no choice. When you close the door so I wouldn't go, it felt like you had every right to do that, it felt so right riddhima (a small smile came across his face thinking about that) but not anymore riddhima, I wanted to give one last try but not anymore.
( riddhima na tum hume chain doge, aur na is dard ki zanzeer se aazad karoge, but still remember one thing main phir bhi tumhen mera dil dete hoon, even if I go, where would I go riddhima, wherever I will go, I will always come back to you, I wanted to tell you this riddhima that do not try to leave me. We need one another, you make me remember what living is, and you make me human, but it is too late now, the only things you going to get from me now is rose with thorne, and I promise you dear wife, in this 7 months you will see other side of your husband, I will make sure you regret every second of it, just like I will remember those horror scene over and over again, I will make sure you see those scene in my eyes everyday living and breathing day of your life sweetheart, you ripped open my heart and rubbed salt in it, then I will make sure you feel what is like to play with a wound heart). He closed his diary and walked to the window, the storm was picking up now, and so was sid bitterness toward his wife, and this storms is not going to stop until it finds its peace.
Point to be noted: Someone needs to love this man, care for him just a little, how could he continue so alone.
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