Chapter 1
At age 24, Riddhima Gupta stepped back on to the same
location she had stepped on 4 years ago. Nothing had changed yet everything
had. Sanjeevani was still the same old hospital it had been but the people had
changed. There was no one here that she would be able to call her own now. No
one'no one at all! Everyone was strangers here, new interns, new doctors and
even new crew. Riddhima wanted to get her old memories back, memories that she
would live with forever but it had all changed now. He wasn't in her life
either. Him'the person she had loved more then her own life. It had been 2
years since she had last seen him, last heard of him. Armaan Malik, he was the
love of her life, and now it was him who wasn't with her any more. Riddhima
still had his memories with her, even for the horrible day, he had told her he
wanted to move on. They still struck her like nightmares.
~
May 15th,
2008
"Armaan, there is a call for you." Riddhima says, picking up
Armaan's cell to receive the call.
"Coming!" Armaan hollers at Riddhima from the bathroom,
while grabbing his Puma t-shirt from the door. It was surely a hot summer day
outside, especially in a town like Mumbai which was filled with traffic
anyways.
"Hello?" Riddhima says into the phone.
"Hello, I am Dr Reynolds from New York University
speaking and I wanted to talk to Dr Armaan Malik." The man on the other line
spoke with a very rich English accent, emphasizing on Armaan's name as if he
hadn't had enough practice with it.
"He is in the bathroom at the moment but I am his fianc
speaking, you can leave a message with me, and I'll pass it on to him."
Riddhima says.
"Okay great. Please tell him that I had received his
application for an internship program in NYU and he can come and start his
internship from July, as that is when the classes start." Dr Reynolds tells
Riddhima about Armaan's internship program in USA.
"For how long is this internship program going to go on
for?" Riddhima asks Dr Reynolds.
"About 5 years. The program itself will finish in 2 years, but
if Armaan wants to say and become a doctor, it will take a longer time, but I
can assure you that once Armaan is done with his internship here, he will be
counted as the world's best doctor." Dr Reynolds tells Riddhima Armaan's whole
plan, making her sad and bewildered at the same time.
"Okay, I shall pass that message on to Armaan." She replies
back, trying to stay calm, but her heart was aching to ask a thousand
questions, not to Dr Reynolds but to Armaan, but she knew, knowing Armaan, she
would not get any straight answers back.
"Thanks'I am sorry I didn't get your name." Dr Reynolds
replies back, giving an embarrassed laugh.
"Riddhima'Dr Riddhima Gupta." Riddhima replies back.
"Okay then Dr Riddhima, we shall talk to each other later.
Bye." And with that, the 2 minute phone call changed the 2 year relationship of
Armaan and Riddhima.
"Who was it Riddhima?" Armaan asks, coming downstairs and
sliding his hands around Riddhima's waist and kissing her shoulder lightly. Who
knew that this would have been their last moment together?
"Dr Reynolds from NYU. He wanted to tell you that you have
been accepted into the internship program." Riddhima says forcing a smile on
her face. She could see Armaan's hands moving away from her waist and his
expressions changing into more troubled ones.
"Riddhima'I was going to tell you about this'" Armaan tries
to reason out with Riddhima.
"When Armaan? When were you going to tell me about this?
When you had brought your flight tickets and were ready to board the flight or
when you had reached USA
and already started your internship program? Huh Armaan? When?" Riddhima wanted
to cry right now. It hurt her that Armaan, who had promised her that he would
tell him everything that was happening in his life and lied to her like this.
"Soon Riddhima, very soon...listen to me Riddhima'this was
once in a life time chance. I didn't want to miss it. Imagine Riddhima, Dr
Armaan Malik'doing his internship program in USA,
and not some Sanjeevani here in India.
I will make good money Riddhima." Armaan tries to tell her his vision of what
he wanted but she knew what she wanted and his vision was not going to affect
her, not anymore.
"What about us Armaan? Fine you want to go to USA to make
your career count, but what about us? We love each other damnit! We are getting
married in 4 weeks!"
"This is about us Riddhima! This is about us! Riddhima we
both would be very successful in USA, than we are here. Our marriage
can wait'can it not? We are already engaged and plus, I wasn't ready for marriage
anyways'and with this internship program in our hands, certainly not now. We
are 22 years old Riddhima, and we have our whole life ahead of us, and just
ruining it for marriage isn't good." Armaan says, putting his hands on
Riddhima's shoulders in order to make her understand.
Riddhima looks into Armaan's eyes, slowly moving his hands
away from her shoulders. "How long is this internship program?" Riddhima asks
Armaan.
"2 years'" Armaan says.
"Jhoot. You are lying again like you always do. Everything
was a lie Armaan, wasn't it?" Riddhima asks, trying to stay strong and not
break down.
Armaan shakes his head but Riddhima could read his eyes. He
loved her yes, but she knew that this marriage, this engagement was of force.
"No Riddhima'I really love you! I really do!" Armaan says, trying to explain to
Riddhima.
"Another lie. If you really did love me Armaan, then you
would have told me everything earlier and not now. I bet you that I wouldn't
have known about this, until you would have left for America, isn't this the truth
Armaan?" she asks him, this time hoping he would take the initiative of saying
the truth.
Armaan looks down at the ground, and then up to her face.
Riddhima smiles, a painful one. Armaan tried to look for the right words to put
in front of Riddhima but Riddhima didn't want him to say anything. Armaan not
saying anything spoke those millions of truths, which he wouldn't speak, when
he did.
"Ridd'" Armaan tries to say something to her but Riddhima
puts her finger on Armaan's mouth.
"Don't say anything Armaan. It's hard as it is. So I guess
this is goodbye?" Riddhima says, placing a kiss on Armaan's cheek while he
closed his eyes to seep through what he had done. Riddhima smiles and turns
around to leave and walks a few steps before she hears Armaan's voice call out
for her.
"Riddhima'will you wait for me?" Armaan asks Riddhima,
looking at her eyes.
"You will get your answer Armaan." Riddhima says turning
around so he wouldn't see her tears. She takes out the ring he had given her on
their engagement day. He didn't want this engagement, or even this wedding.
There was no reason she'd hold onto his ring either. She gently places the ring
on the side table and dares to turn around to see Armaan's eyes moist, but
trying to hold back the tears.
She didn't expect him to say anything and neither did he say
anything either. "I am sorry Armaan. You never wanted all this and I don't want
to be a hurdle in your way. I love you Armaan and I always will, but 5 years is
a long wait and when you are not even sure if you love me, there is no point of
me to keep myself in the hope that you would come to me one day."
~
Present Day Sanjeevani
Riddhima smiled at her own destiny, or perhaps she smiled at
the way she had changed her own destiny. If she had wanted, she could have
stayed with Armaan and waited for him to come back, but she didn't do that,
because she knew, all that would give her was pain for the one simple fact that
he had lied to her'in a way betrayed her. She wasn't going to be a hurdle on
him, she had decided long ago and that was just going to be it. She was going
to restart her life. What had happened with her in those 10 months, was
something she would have wanted to keep to herself but despite doing that,
everyone must have known. That time, when she had left after meeting Armaan,
ending their relationship, she hadn't exactly gone into depression but she
couldn't be the same none the less. She had to show to Armaan that she was
strong but she had given in to her own love.
That day, of June 20th had come, when it was
Armaan's flight, Riddhima had gone to drop him off, say bye one last time'as a
friend. Their families had understood that Armaan wanted to focus on his career
and wanted Riddhima to do the same and therefore, no one had really asked both
of them any questions and quietly agreed to whatever decision Armaan and
Riddhima made.
It was Dr. Shashank Gupta that had taken the first care for
her daughter and asked her what she wanted the time Armaan had gone away'from
her life forever.
"Are you happy Riddhima?" he had asked then. He knew the
answer better then she did but yet he had asked, for that one simple reason, he
wanted to pacify her.
"It hurts dad'but I'll be alright'" Riddhima had replied
back, sharing her true feelings. Out of all people, she didn't want to be the
one to lie to Shashank. She had always looked up to Shashank and now, lying to
him wasn't going to do her any better, plus, he would have been able to read it
from her eyes and voice anyways.
Shashank had given Riddhima a silent hug, a hug that would
tell Riddhima that her father would be there with her forever and support every
decision of hers, as long as it was right for her. Riddhima had smiled then,
smiled seeing that despite losing one person that meant the life to her, she
still had another, which she respected more.
Life had almost gone back to normal, but it quite hadn't.
Everyone had tried to cheer Riddhima up but had failed and she gave them her
best fake, plastic smile. One day, as God would have said it, she had gotten
into an accident while on her Gurgaon check-ups where she had to give free
medical help for people that were too poor to afford some. She had met with an
accident trying to save a 4 year old girl from getting underneath a careless
driver's truck.
Riddhima had felt her life ending then, with the sirens of
ambulance taking her to the nearest medical hospital. She had come to know that
a lot of blood had been taken away from her veins and it even felt like that.
She could feel her eyes all watery, her brain frozen for a long time, and
everything around her turning pitch black. She had lost a lot of blood, a lot
meaning enough to kill her but she had held back. When she had regained her
consciousness, she had come to know that a Delhi-mate had given her blood. When
her heart ached to thank that 24 year old man, the nurse had told her he had
left. Vanished into thin air.
When Riddhima had tried to inquire about that man, who had
saved her life, the nurse had told her how he seemed to have been heart broken,
suffering from a break-up or else trying to think of ways of how to not
overcome them. The nurse had told her how the man seemed to be the rudest man
on the earth, from his behaviour, but then she had added how he was a nice human
being once you would come to know him. Riddhima had smiled at that man's story.
It seemed somewhat like her own except maybe, perhaps a lot more extreme.
Riddhima had left her telephone number with the nurse and
told her that if she saw the man around here somewhere, she could give her a
call and tell him to call her as well. This man seemed interesting to her.
Riddhima stepped into Sanjeevani for the nth time ever but
yet, it seemed like the first time ever. A new day, a new year, a changed
Riddhima, and a fresh start.
Edited by *Shifali* - 14 years ago
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