"I want to get some sleep" Aarti finally said after hearing out what Yash had said.
"Don't you have anything to say?" Yash questioned hesitantly, still not able to quite meet Aarti's eyes.
"It has been a long and tiring day and I am just tired Yashji" Aarti said and went and flopped on the bed.
"Of course you must be tired, you should get some rest...if you want...if you want... I will sleep on the couch" Yash volunteered, feeling that Aarti may not like him close to her right now.
"Do as you please...I just...I just want to sleep" Aarti said and with that her head hit the pillow and she slept off. That was the most peaceful sleep she had had in the longest time she had known.
Yash on the other hand was left to wonder what Aarti made of his confession. He tossed and turned the whole night. Maybe he deserved this night of sleeplessness and restlessness. Aarti's tears had left him feeling so guilty that he did not know how he could ever make up for the heartache she had suffered that was caused by him. But if Aarti had done what she did now in Bhopal that time itself...they could have had things in the open then and there.
Ok so he was making excuses for his lack of courage and that was bad. He had behaved badly so the onus was on him to set things straight.
He felt ashamed that he had let things be for the fear of rocking the boat. Why the hell had he not opened up? Why the hell did they not share this one thing between them? Hell they shared everything else didn't they?
But the only thing that made him happy was the thought that the night meant something to Aarti. Only then his rejection later could have caused this outburst.
What did she want this relationship to be then? He so wanted the night to end fast so that in the morning he could get answers from her but then he did not want the night to end at all if Aarti was just going to ignore him in the morning or hate him come to that.
Let me at least try and make up for her suffering. I know I cannot rewind the time but at least I would get the satisfaction of trying to cheer her up. God she looked so sad, and all because of me. I have so much to make up for, if only she gives me a chance...if only she gives us a chance. He prayed to God that all he wanted now was a fair hearing and a judgement in his favour.
What if I had become pregnant? She had questioned. He had thought about that on countless occasions but he knew she had had her period after returning to Bhopal. He felt very sorry that his secret wish and hidden desire was not meant to be. In his mind's eye he had seen a beautiful girl just like Aarti with big eyes and an impish smile. He so wished that they would complete the family with the addition of one such baby girl. But then he had many other dreams too. He just hoped his dreams did not remain...just dreams and that he would endeavour to eventually turn them into reality.
Somewhere in riding the emotional roller coaster with all his thoughts, he finally slept too.
It was morning when Yash woke with a start. He called room-service for some fresh coffee and left the door slightly ajar so that the knock did not disturb Aarti's sleep. When it was delivered he went to freshen up avoiding to look in the direction of the bed where Aarti slept like a baby. Just then Aarti woke up too. To see herself in an empty room Aarti suddenly felt very lonely and afraid; then she heard the sound from the bathroom and heaved a sigh of relief.
She saw the trolley carrying coffee present in the room and smiled as she stretched and put on her slippers.
Suddenly Aarti felt nervous at facing Yash. She did not know what to say. His confession had lifted the shadow cast over that special night. For the longest time she feared that she had somehow been the cause of his behaviour, having had that assumption removed she felt... happy, relieved. But it did not excuse his lack of trust in her. He could have saved both of them a lot of trouble had he come clean in Mumbai or later in Bhopal but on both occasion he made unilateral decisions which now cut her really deep. Did he think so less of her? Did he really think that she could stoop so low?
But he was NOT 100 percent wrong. She had gone to Mumbai with an ulterior motive. She did want a change in their relationship. But that was all there was to it. She knew she had overstepped the boundaries they had set for their relationship. And that could have confused Yash. She had to give him at least some benefit of doubt. Till they were in Bhopal prior to that she had either blocked his advances or been indifferent to them. So his thinking and finding her so changed in Mumbai could have given him the wrong impression. Aarti tried not to think about the role of Bua right then. She had gotten used to her evil ways. She knew she had to use what she knew to put an end to this.
Again her mind went back to Yash. Once he himself realized that he was mistaken about her why then did he not come clean? Why did he hold himself back? He was a very straight forward and honest person was he not. Then what stopped him. The only reason she could think of was his fear of rejection.
The notion was too unbelievable to be true and had it not been such a serious thing Aarti would have found it funny. She was the one always unsure of Yash and his accepting her love let alone reciprocating it. But it seems Yash too suffered from similar insecurities. It made her heart go out to him. No one likes to be in a position of doubt. And for a proud man like Yash who was so self sufficient and self-contained, it would have been doubly difficult to bare his heart out. It must so have been easier for him to believe the worst than to take a chance and trust her with his feelings.
That self preservation on his part she could relate to that.
Aww...Yashji. Don't you know I love you?
Obviously he didn't.
But then he had not said anything about his feelings for her. He did not mention anything about love. No explicit verbal declarations nothing of that sort.
Do I really need to hear it? I don't...or maybe I do.
After Prashanth rejecting me for another woman and facing a rejection at Yashji's hand, my self esteem is at the lowest. I want...I need to hear him say what he feels for me. Only then...only then can I feel confident enough to open up my feelings for him. But is he up to it? Does he need my prompting? Let me find out.
It has to be LOVE...what else could it possibly be? Why would a man react so strongly if he feels he had been wronged if there are no deeper feelings involved? Why would a man keep his thoughts to himself if he does not care about how his thoughts might be perceived and reacted upon?
Yes Yashji is in LOVE with me.
It brought a smile to her face. And the smile became a grin and she found she liked the thought. No she actually LOVED the thought.
Yashji loves me.
She got up from the bed and started to spin around out of happiness and then crashed into a hard surface. It was Yash. He had just come back from the bathroom and he caught Aarti from falling.
"Are you all right Aartiji?" he asked all concerned.
"I am now. I am now" she said with meaning know only to her. Then she gave him a dazzling smile and stood straight noting that Yash very reluctantly let go of her. She smiled some more to herself. God all these days I was so blind that I could not see the love so openly visible in his eyes. Every single gesture of his spoke of his love so loud and clearly and I was so lost in my own world that I failed to notice it before.
Awww...I love him so much. I just want to wind my arms about him and tell him that he is everything to me.
Don't give in that easily Aarti. Get him to confess first.
She did not like that part of her subconscious and wanted to shut it up but the thought refused to go away.
"So?" Yash asked straight away.
"So what Yashji?" Aarti said deliberately playing dumb.
"You know... about last night..."
"Oh ho Yashji beet gayee baat gayee (what's done is done). Why are you so hung up on last night? Look around you it's a beautiful new day" Aarti said cheerfully.
"That's it...you are not angry at me anymore?" Yash asked unable to understand Aarti's reaction or rather non-reaction and feeling utterly confused and a bit shocked.
"Oh I am angry at you Yashji. Very very angry" Aarti said faking anger.
"I knew it...I knew it. And you have every right to be so. I will say sorry again and again if that helps and I will do whatever it takes..." Yash started to march and talk fast not noting how Aarti was controlling her laughter.
"Coffee Yashji" Aarti said interrupting his tirade.
"Coffee?" Yash stopped in his tracks after hearing what Aarti said and checking if he did hear correctly.
"I am angry because you ordered coffee even before I woke up so now it must have become cold by now"
"Coffee...cold coffee?" Yash repeated as if Aarti had spoken so unknown foreign language.
He looked so cute and adorable that Aarti just wanted to reach out and pull his cheeks, but she resisted.
"What else? (She asked innocently) And today is such an important day. You have that important meeting with Aman while I have shopping to do" Aarti said getting busy and moving towards the bathroom.
Yash pulled her back and grasped both her upper arms in a wisp like grip.
"Now what Yashji? Are we not getting late? I think this Delhi weather has done something to you. You have suddenly become slow and sloppy" Aarti asked faking exasperation.
"Why are you behaving as if nothing has happened?" Yash asked seriously, not liking Aarti being flippant as he increased the pressure of his hands on hers.
"What did you expect me to do?" Aarti questioned back wickedly enjoying tormenting Yash.
"I...I thought...I thought...I don't know" Yash truly was finding himself out of his depth there. He let go of Aarti's hand.
"See you yourself don't know. Ok just tell me one thing. Why did my so-called "trap" have such a devastating effect on you? Why did you not speak about it in Bhopal when you had calmed down? Why are you so so affectionate and caring towards me?"
Yash kept quiet.
"Hmm...OK figure out an answer for those questions and then we can talk further. In the meantime...I need to get ready" with that she turned around intentionally whipping her hair on his face while doing so and feeling pleased at his in drawn breath.
God I am having so much fun. She thought to herself. Gotcha Yashji.
Yash stood rooted to the spot where Aarti had left him. His eyes still closed from the pleasure of having her hair brush his face.
This was so not what he had expected. Aarti being this jovial and carefree did not make much sense to him. Or did it?
What had she asked him? WHY had he behaved as he had? WHY did he care for her?
Very simple... because he LOVED her and could not handle any other emotion from her be it supposed betrayal or assumed rejection.
Did she want to hear that he loved her? Could it be that she had guessed it already? Was that why she was feeling all too pleased with herself?
It thrilled him to think that she had reacted the way she had. If knowing about his love for her made her this happy that could only mean she loved him back.
SHE LOVES ME.
OH MY GOD!
SHE LOVES ME TOO.
Yash jumped and punched the air with his fist.
Well madam I am onto you little game now. Now let me see if you still find me slow and sloppy shall we. Just like you want me to confess...I want you to confess too. I have waited a freakishly long time for this.
-----------------------------------------------
They kept grinning at each other while they got ready. Yash had volunteered to drop her to Sarojini market which was on the way to where his meeting was going to be. After finishing their breakfast in the restaurant downstairs they waited for their car at the entrance. Yash took the keys from the driver and informed him that his services will not be needed for the time being and that he could come in the evening to drop them to the airport.
"Yashji don't you think the weather is just breathtaking outside"
"Yes it is Aartiji"
"I wish we could spend more time here"
"So do I"
Both looked at each other for the longest time till Aarti broke the spell.
"Eyes on the road please" Aarti said giggling.
"When I talked with the kids earlier they were just so anxious to have us back" Aarti said missing her kids equally.
"Yes they tried to keep it a secret surprise but Palak just blurted out that they have a surprise gift waiting for us" Yash said shifting the gears and navigating along the roads of Delhi.
"WOW! That is so sweet to them. I just pray they like what I am planning on buying for them here today" Aarti said suddenly feeling unsure.
"I am sure they will love it Aartiji" Yash assured her placing his hand on hers before removing it to shift the gear.
"Do you really think they will 'LOVE' it?" Aarti asked deliberately stressing on the word love, trying to get a reaction out of Yash at the word.
"Yes I think they will really "LOVE" it, Aartiji. I mean your choice is always top class" Yash said not giving what Aarti really craved yet hinting at it in a roundabout way.
"Is that a fact? You do know ours was a arranged marriage so I did not exactly "choose" you...just wanted to clarify it hope you are not in any miscomprehension" Aartu said deliberately teasing Yash.
"But I did "choose" you Aartiji...as you already know" Yash said and gave her a sideway glance and noting the pretty blush on her face.
"Yes...but why did you? Why did you chose me...is what I want to know?"
"Well I just fell in LOVE"
"WHAT?" Aarti could not believe he would just blurt it out like that.
"I mean I just fell in LOVE with the idea of getting married again" Yash modified his statement much to Aarti's annoyance.
"I see" Aarti said quietly enjoying the game they were playing.
"Do you? Fine my turn to question. I would like to know why you tried to change our status quo in Mumbai" Yash asked seriously.
"I think you have already guessed that, just like I have already guessed somethings about you, Yashji" Aarti said suddenly finding she had enough of this cat and mouse game.
He did not speak after that. Just to lower the temperature in the car he switched on the music system. The show was playing one romantic number after the other and Yash was having a tough time concentrating on driving. He eyes kept darting towards Aarti and Aarti on her part met his eyes held them and only backed away or lowered them when she was overcome by the acute shyness.
Yash finally stopped the car at the entrance of the market. He kept looking at Aarti. Aarti held her breath, she felt that the moment had come for which she was waiting for. Yash opened his mouth to speak.
"I" Yash stopped.
"I love" Yash added and then again stopped.
"I love?" Aarti asked not able to contain her excitement.
"I love ...I love the song that played last. I mean it's been so long since I have heard it but it still has the same effect on me" Yash said and took in Aarti's utter disappointment and subsequent anger. He had a tough time controlling his laughter.
"Ok Yashji...fine. I am going. And I am not doing any shopping for you by the way, you don't deserve Aarti's special gifts" Aarti got down and banged the door shut. Yash gave into this laughter finally. He found her anger so cute.
Aarti came to the driver's side and knocked on the window. Yash lowered it still laughing.
"I forgot my mobile in the room. So I will call you from a PCO if I get late. If I finish off early I will take a taxi back to the hotel" Aarti said still feeling angry at Yash especially seeing him laughing at her expense.
Yash nodded.
"By the way I too have to tell you something Yashji" Aarti said.
"What?" Yash questioned curiously.
"I" Aarti started just like Yash.
"I?" Yash questioned when she stopped knowing Aarti was just trying to get back at him.
"I love" Aarti continued huskily and bent down to bring her face closer to that of Yash and traced his face with her finger from forehead to his chin.
"I love?" Yash gulped all laughter, all games forgotten.
"I love Delhi. Take that Yashji now we are even.(Aarti straightened and distanced herself from the car) Go and enjoy your boring meeting. I am going" Aarti turned and started to go away in a huff loving to dish out as good as she got.
"Aartiji" Yash called her back.
"What?" Aarti stopped and turned.
"Don't say I am going. Say see you soon"
"What?"
"Humour me. Just say see you soon."
"Alright 'see you soon'. Now leave. I have shopping to do" Aarti said.
Yash gave her a smile and closed the window. Aarti turned and started to go into the market. Yash kept looking at her till she disappeared in the crowd. Finally Yash started the car and began to drive away.
It was after he had gone some distance away did he hear an ear-piercing sound that caused the windows of his car to crack. Yash stamped the brake with all his might and the car skidded and came to a screeching halt. He immediately got off the car and to his utter shock and horror he saw smoke and fire coming from the market.
"AARTIJIII" Yash shrieked till his throat got hoarse and started to run towards the market where a few seconds back a bomb had exploded.
"NO NO NO NO NO NOOO" he yelled when he reached the spot where he had last said goodbye to her.
Was that going to be their final farewell?
TO BE CONTINUED...
Edited by Deepti1808 - 12 years ago
Fan Fictions
Kabhi Neem Neem Kabhi Shahad Shahad
