Blast From The Past Thread #4, Epi 62 Pg 139 - Page 36

Originally posted by: DurgaS

Thank you for sharing your story with us. Wow. We do hear that some things in life happen for a purpose. We don't realise then, but the realisation does dawn upon us after sometime. That's what I felt after reading this. Happy Valentine' s Day.

Originally posted by: ipkkndfan30

Happy Valentines day cinthia. Read your real life love story and felt all warm inside :) I am happy that you got your LG and he got his sankadevi :)

I pray to God that everyone gets a partner whom they like in thier life too.

Keep having many more wonderful years ahead in your married life.

Originally posted by: ArshiHamesha

Cynthia...Such a lovely story my Friend!!!

Here is something for you and ALL

[YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eioCeFMuA34[/YOUTUBE]

Originally posted by: DurgaS

I agree with this totally. That's one of the things that I like about the show. I remember when the hut scene promos were being shown, I was wondering whether I should watch the epi or not, because there were other people in my house. However, I did watch it, with a remote in my hand, ready to change the channel, if needed. But, I didn't have to. And IPK won my heart that day. (By the way, I wasn't reading IF at that time, so didn't know anything about the off-screen situation - Barun's leave, BDs, etc.)

Originally posted by: cinthiann1758

Indi, my heart is so touched by the idea that your heart was overwhelmed by our love story. I wanted to embellish but decided to just state the facts. Believe me there is more to the story then what was written, it truly was, undeniably, Divine intervention. I think that is why I relate to IPK so much! Love you and this thread so much! Enjoy your night of Valentines Day. haha🤗

Originally posted by: Katelyn

Hi Cynthia! Thank you for sharing your lovely story with us! It is very touching! I had tears in my eyes after reading it! I'm so glad you've found your true love! By the way, I recall that you wrote a story that you've keep on your desktop! Please do share with us whenever you are comfortable! I would love to read it because I really love your beautiful writing.

Originally posted by: cinthiann1758

That is what I love most of Indian serials and especially IPK. The mesmerizing , passionate pull without the exposure of skin. it is truly amazing what Barun and Sanaya did with Arnav and Kushi!

Originally posted by: BarunDiwani

Waking up in ROMANCE HEAVEN this morning :)

@ Cinthia, your story is beautiful! right out of a movie, you have me grabbing my heart.35 yrs later, you're still very much in ❤️ me loves it! thank you for sharing and so true, everything happens for a reason. Thank you for sharing it!!!

@Katelyn, thanks for sharing those beautiful edits, your have some talented friends, and i agree, how can v-day be complete with out a viewing of the Diwali-kiss...i can't wait to watch the VM when i have a bit more time :)

@Ritu, beautiful collage, some of my fav moments!

@Supriya, OMG you paint? I'm absolutely floored seriously 👏👏

@ArshiH, ❤️ the collage you made, capturing the beautiful intense passion of our couple

Originally posted by: indi52

she sat there among the velvet red petals. around her lay a languorous quiet.

he had left, angry and frustrated; furious with her... with the night. with himself. and she'd come down to their room, to the bed bedecked for love where a hundred doubts in the head had taken away everything her heart was sure of. she reached for a petal, such knowledge in its seamless velvet. what does a rose know that makes it so unafraid of death? so eager to live and be beautiful even if for a few short hours? strange thoughts wandered through her. there was a pain rising. deep in the pit of her stomach, searing; it surged through her heart. and she heard again.

"that i love you, dammit!"

in the midst of the mayhem, the breaking of furniture, the kerosene splashed violently, the fire being lit, the hoisting into strong impetuous arms, the crazy spin of pheras, in all the tumult of emotions, their voices rising, in all of that so much had been said, yet now only one thing remained.

words that refused to leave with him; that clung to her thoughts. jo tum mehsoos karti ho... jo main mehsoos karta hoon. her heart beat recorded the words, they hastened, they slowed. a frown gathered on her forehead.

that i love you, dammit!

she heard the words as though he were there, right next to her, storm in his eyes. rituals, customs, traditions, if nothing has any meaning, what has meaning according to you, she'd flared at him, ignited by his anger, wracked by uncertainty, "kis cheez ka koi matlab hai?"

and he'd shot back, on that terrace where love was to have come one night but instead betrayal had usurped the hour. standing there, facing his wife, his patni, he claimed his moment back without knowing he was; he told her the one thing that had meaning. that had matter. that had koi matlab. and that didn't give a damn for any evidence, any witness, any proof of innocence, anything, it just was. and that's all that mattered.

her eyes felt a sudden moistness. she knew how hard it must have been for him to say those words. how hard to just walk away after saying them. she'd seen the gleam in his eyes when he gave her the gift and commanded her to go get changed.

is that any way to treat your "patni," she'd pouted at him, and left. when she saw the beautiful red lehenga glimmering with star like sequins, simple yet sensuous, classic but not usual, her heart had felt a tumble. this was chosen by him, by him for her, it had sung. she felt precious, beautiful. and she felt the touch of his desire. that night in the guest house, his hand on her cheek wandering, meandering still in her subconscious, that feel... yes, something of that touch here, right here.

it was a delicate heady feeling. she hugged it close as she stood before the mirror holding the soft folds of red against her heart for just a little while before beginning to slip into the clothes.

she was surprised, there was no dupatta.

her brow puckered. surely, he knew she couldn't wear such an alluring blouse without her... then she realised. a little smiled peeped out unbidden. he was playing with her.

a thrill in her at the thought. yet at once too, an uncanny fear; descended out of nowhere. what should she do? oh, she was so unsure of all of this. outside, when she peeped hesitantly from behind the wardrobe and he turned, the look in his eyes made her knees buckle. how could a man have so much love in his eyes? was this her rakshas, her laad governor. but the fear had a stronger hold than the melting things in her.

he came to her; in wonder, in gratitude almost it seemed, and led her ever so tenderly by her hand into the room. that's when her eyes fell upon the flowers. virginal white, deep passionate red, fragrance of innocence and knowing mingling in the air, tuberoses and roses across their bed, breathtaking. suhag raat.

he had planned suhag raat. "tum kitni intelligent ho," he'd teased her after asking her to name all the wedding rituals, "peechhe se shuru kartein hain." we'll do them all he'd promised, only we'll do them in reverse order. and he'd meant it!

laad governor kahin ke.

she'd almost started smiling, but then felt the tremors assail her breath again. unknown fear. she remembered the moments as she played with the flowers, just sitting there, waiting. waiting for what though? he's left in extreme anger, and when he did that, it usually meant a long drive in the dark. in seclusion, in his hermetic suv, away from all.

a breeze rustled in the night, ripplingthe water in the pool, lifting and entering the room, rustling the petals.

a night came unasked into the room and took her in its arms. a dark, riven night, shredded by suspicion, accusation, and an unthinkable ultimatum.

tum mujhse shadi karogi. abhi. issi waqt. nahi toh... you will marry me now, or else your sister's wedding will not go ahead. yet again.

there was clear naked hatred in a voice. no mercy in the hands that dragged her up the steps of a temple. no tenderness as they went around her neck and tied a mangalsutra, and dragged a streak of sindoor down the parting of her hair. the winds howled, bells rang raging, the world spun around as dreams died; and yet agni stood witness, alongside god, and the mantras chanted their benevolence, their blessing. there was no stopping the night.

her hand went up and touched her mangalsutra. black beads strung on pure, lustrous, unimpeachable 24 carat gold... sign of marriage. hamesha. she'd asked him that night if he understood the meaning of this necklace, and the streak of vermillion he'd hurled at her with not a word of explanation or love.

why? she asked herself this tonight, why are you wearing this thread of eternal tie? why could you never take it off? why did you wear it that day? do you understand its ...?

some answers come to you even before the question is asked. this one rushed in from somewhere just above the place where breath comes from. she knew why she had agreed to go to that temple that night. and why he had insisted on marriage, though a contract, but marriage, nonetheless. he hadn't asked her to leave the city, or tried to buy her off. he could have done that. especially, since he believed she could stoop that low.

but no.

he had dragged her to him, to him alone. in all the anger, the destruction, the bitterness, the shattering of hope, of trust. he had adhered, not thrown asunder.

and she had let him.

would he have done that if she were another woman. or she have gone along if he were another man? she shuddered at the mere thought. and she felt his touch, his featherlight murmur on the nape of her neck. a shiver in her breath, a tautening across her body. heady scent of flowers.

she picked up a rose petal and felt a strange calm certainty. at last. at last she lifted her gazed and looked at radha in the embrace of her eternal partner, krishna. at last she understood.


when he returned, the room was empty. he'd thought, as usual, moving through the night. he'd managed to see why she was not ready. he couldn't bear to see even a shred of distrust or fear in her eyes. never again. he'd do whatever it takes to make her feel whole, complete, loved, and in the way she wanted. he knew what her dream wedding was, he'd heard her telling her friends that story made of lies of her perfect wedding, it shall be hers, it shall be true.

but where was she?

she remembered how gently, how with tender care and held back yearning, he'd placed that missing dupatta on her head. it felt like he completed the act of marriage at last.

i will not let you go, i will take you to the place that is sacred to you if notme, i will tie you with signs that mean eternity and say it's only for six months, i will not let you go. and because you know my heart, breath, sinew, because i know yours, we will find our way to each other, passing through every travail, every torrent along the way, i'll find you, you'll find me. and every dream of yours will be my duty to fulfill, every desire of yours i'll cherish, and make mine, your respect will be resting place, and i will protect it with all i am, let me place this dupatta on you with this promise, for all that means anything to me at all is

that i love you dammit.

she'd hidden from him the sudden thrill his fingers on her bare earlobe had evoked, when he placed the diaphanous veil on her head. she sighed and closed her eyes.

he ran outside looking for her. and there she lay by the pool, on the chair where so much had happened; mud in her eyes, her dhadkane racing, payal on her shyly extended ankle... she opened her eyes.

he wanted to say so much, yet there he stood. unable to form the words. she walked up to him.

he remembered a girl, scared, on a ramp another night. and then another... when the wind rose tossing up her hair in the crumbling guest house, eternity in those torn moments... there she was by this poolside backing away and his gaze riveted on her trembling lips... and then in that temple tears streaming down her eyes as the bells clanged, the fire raged and he lifted his hand to...

he couldn't bear the pain. he closed his eyes.

she stepped right up to him and gently placed her lips on his.

without volition his arms reached out and went around her. and she held him to her, her arms stretching out, her back arching, pulling him closer. her dearest one, her man, her husband. he held her lips in the sweetest kiss. but then her hand moved and took hold of his, only to guide it gently to her heart. she had no other way of telling him what she wanted to. she was his wife, his patni, and she wanted to be his. that was all.

he lifted her in his arms as he had done so many times before, and brought her to that bed he'd set up with such anticipation; out of all things, a suitcase packed with a whole suhag raat. the innocence of rajanigandha wrapped around the seduction of the rose. he laid her gently among the flowers once more, and as he made to move away, she drew him down with lissome longing arms. no need to close the door, let the poolside watch, let the wind blow, let's just make love. say nothing, just love me.

but how did you know, asked his dhadkan.
bas, pata chal jaata hai... sometimes, like those luscious, openly sensual petals, you just know, said hers.

iss pyaar mein sahi aur galat ka koi matlab nahin... agar matlab hai toh sirf iss baat ka... ki main tumse hamesha hamesha


a story dedicated to asr and khsuhi this valentine's day. i have long felt that the suhag raat scene, one of my favourites, was unfair to a true man, a magnificent man in love. and also his woman. it deserved another story. this one maybe? hope you enjoyed. and here's to pyaar, why bother to give it a name. happy v day, and memorable v night.

Disclaimer:I would like to acknowledge that all my translations have been found on You Tube Videos translated by Alexa. All credit of translation and my interpretation of her work is acknowledged. All work I consider to be my own with the help of the translation. If work is used please credit. Thank you all for reading!

Episode 55

I Will Not Lose!

"Lavanya Kashyup! How dare you enter the temple without bathing? Didn't I tell you last night? What did you think I would not find out? You don't care what I say! I knew you would be late, a person must know faith. Who taught you? After lying you have showed me your true colors! I'm not just angry but I am ashamed!" Lavanya's response is "Oh God." And she runs away. "Have you seen? Have you seen?" she asks everyone else. "Today I feel very bad and will not be able to do pooja." She leaves, on her mind she may be saying 'I will not lose my grandson to this woman!' Anjali wants to go to her and Shyam stops her; he tells her to leave her alone for a while she has every reason to be upset, what Lavanya did was not good. We will talk about it later. He has to go to "work" and if he didn't have to go he would always be by her side. Liar, I hope you lose….everything. Mami says Nani is up one and Lavanya is down one. She asks Anjali can we eat now. Mami is always hungry just like Kushi! Mamaji tells his son to listen to him and never marry for love. He thinks you can't lose that way!

Kushi and Payal go to all the hotel sweet shops and even with their cute dialogue they were rejected, turned away, empty handed of orders.

ASR is on the phone making arrangements for a party. La bursts in saying,"ASR you won't believe what just happened in the temple." He lets her know he doesn't have time to deal with her. He has one day to make all the arrangements for his sister's anniversary party. Lavanya's eyes light up, now you're talking her style! It's about time something happens in the house she can relate to. She has waited so long, (I thought she just got there), and she wants to know if he made arrangements for the champagne fountain. ASR reminds her that the Raizada house does not consume alcohol, so no, there will be no champagne. "Oh, it's okay, no problem. What should I wear? Should I wear that red saree from the bridal collection? You know the one Chamkilli wore at the photo shoot." He stops, images of Kushi in the saree flowing through his mind. She looks beautiful, oh those innocent eyes, her hair loose and flowing, simply breathtaking. He gets annoyed. "Enough, Lavanya, from now on I don't want to hear her name!" "ASR…." (ASR's thoughts at this moment: I will not lose my sanity, my self, my mind, my heart to THAT girl!)

Kushi and Payal are in another hotel shop and they once again are being rejected. As they are walking away the manager receives a phone call from someone who wants sweets for 200 from Lucknow. He says he will have them there and his assistant is signing to him NO, NO. He hangs up and the assistant says his supplier from Lucknow will not be available to fill orders until next month. Kushi overhears and turns back telling him that she is from Lucknow taste her sweets, go ahead taste them. He does and they love them. He hires her for the job for tomorrow night. His phone rings again and he tells his customer that all will be well. He has original Lucknow sweets that are delicious and will be ready for his party for tomorrow. He ordered extra jalebi too! He can't lose!

Kushi and Payal are trying to figure out their finances and supplies. All they have is 1000 rupees and very little time to prepare their sweets. Kushi says to her sister not to lose confidence. They will make the sweets, everyone will love them and they will receive more orders. Buaji comes and hands Kushi her bangles and says to take them to the pawn shop. Kushi starts crying and Buaji says look it started again, tears, we are not selling we are just giving them to the pawn shop. We will get them back after we pay our debts and make a profit. They hug. It is time to begin; they have nothing to lose only to gain!

After they have bought their supplies, they are making sure they have everything and now they can begin. She says to Payal the only thing missing is your smile! Yes, ladies it is very important that when you are baking that you have your whole heart, soul and smile involved while preparing! Shyam comes and everyone is happy to see him. He has brought gifts to help with the baking. How did you know we are baking, oh she looks at the utensil in her hand and he points to the flour on her face. Kushi tells him they have a very large order due tomorrow. He has come to help he says. Buaji is watching the two and takes blessings. Everybody is preparing the sweets and Shyam grabs Kushi's hand that was near the hot oil. He apologises. Why do you apologise? She looks at her wound on her wrist someone else is at fault. It is Arnav Singh Raizada's fault. Every thing happens because of that Rakshas ASR. All the problems Payal says it is because of her, they had to mortgage the house for the wedding and Kushi says no it was ASR, the Rakshas fault. Right, Shyamji? Ofcourse, he says, but in his mind he says he doesn't know what to do he can't give reasons to either Anjali or Kushi. He is going to lose either way.

ASR opens his closet and in there he sees a tiny box. It contains the pearls from Kushi's dori. He looks at them, reverently he takes the box and places it in his hands. He views the images in his mind of what he did to her. He gets angry, throws the pearls and thinks in his mind, "I am not so weak to always be thinking about that girl. She haunts my mind like a ghost. I WILL NOT LOSE! Feelings and emotions have no place in my life and I will not let you enter into my life or get under my skin! Now you are a part of my past. Kushi Kumari Gupta is only a name to me now!"

Arnav Singh Raizada you have already lost yourself to one Kushi Kumari Gupta, got that. You can say 'I will not lose' as much as you want; you have been defeated by the young, naieve, middle class girl from Lucknow!😆

PS Happy Valentine's Day!