FF: D for Desire #2 (Ch 15 - 21) - Page 54

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19

"Would you like to meet my parents," Khushi asked Arnav as she kept watching the fishes, finally breaking the silence. It had been a while that they were sitting together in the balcony. They had felt each other through their locked fingers; they had not felt the need to speak. Both had been submerged in their own world - reliving their past, apprehending the future, trying to fathom the strange equation between them that they could neither understand nor escape.

Arnav tried to shake off the gloominess that had grappled him after long. He had taught himself to wrap everything under harshness & toughness – never to give in to the pain that life gave him. He hardly allowed himself any time to think anything beyond work or his little family in the Raizada Mansion. He spent little time with his family – not willing to get too involved but he made sure all of their needs were attended to. He was over protective of his sister but he still did not allow her to pamper him much or even to spend much time. To the world – even to his family, he was the unsociable, apathetic, pragmatic businessman who considered relations as mere responsibilities. But deep down in his heart, only he knew his fears have gotten the better of him. His fears of losing & getting hurt had led him to build a wall around him that with time became a part of him. He was feeling rather strange realizing the wall was not protecting him anymore. He felt protected in the warm hug of this strange woman sitting beside him when he felt his wall breaking down. He was feeling protected even now as her fingers clutched his. Even her silence gave him strength.

"Tumhari parents," Arnav asked rather bewildered as he turned to face her. Khushi turned too and Arnav saw her smile reaching her eyes.

"Haan, meri amma-babuji," her smile grew bigger, "Would you like to meet?"

Arnav stared at her for a few seconds.

"Mmm .. yes?"

A confused Arnav watched as Khushi stood up and walked up to the end of the balcony.

"There are my parents," Khushi said smilingly pointing at the sky and turned to face Arnav. She could see from his face that he was going through multitude of emotions and a little confusion.

"That one is amma," she continued pointing her finger at a particular star, "and that one is babuji. They are always there for me and I talk to them every night."

Arnav stood up and walked up to Khushi. "What do you talk to them," facing the sky he asked her.

"Anything. How the day went. How their daughter is doing. How they are doing."

"Do you think they can hear you?"

"Of course. Your loved ones can always hear you – wherever they are, wherever you are."

"So you believe your parents now live in the stars?"

"No. They are the stars."

Arnav turned to face Khushi and saw her happily staring at the sky, perhaps smiling at her parents. This girl was a package full of surprises and so unlike him. They were so similar down their base but so opposite when it came to their way of dealing life. When he was running away from the pain, she was facing it everyday with a smile. He too has lost and he too still had people around him who loved him. Then why could not he be happy like her? Why his only satisfaction lied in his ventures? Why every win only left him tormented for more? Why was he really never happy?

"Amma-Babuji, this is Arnav," Khushi said enthusiastically, "It is all his fault that I could not talk to you tonight."

"What?" Arnav responded without any thought, trying to shake off the gloominess again, "My fault?"

"Of course. He kept me busy and I could not talk to you."

Arnav did not think twice before he joined the conversation with the stars.

"No. Don't listen to her. It was not my fault. She could have always shut me up and talk to you."

"I could have shut you up? When did you leave me that choice?"

"I did not see you resisting."

"Who can resist a kiss like that?"

"Wow! Did you just say to your parents that you did not talk to them because we were kissing?? I did not say that Aunty. Your daughter did. And it was also not my fault. She allured me."

Khushi suddenly turned red as she realized what she had just said. She watched Arnav smirking most amusedly and she snapped, "How can you talk like that to my parents?"

"I did not tell them anything," Arnav continued smirking, "I am sure your parents will side with me. You said it all."

"Laad Governar kahin ka," Khushi grumbled and turned to walk out of the balcony.

Arnav chuckled and followed her into the room quickly and in a few seconds, Khushi stood flush against him, facing him, with her hands held behind her in a strong grip.

"Where do you think you are going, Khushi Kumari Gupta?"

"I am sleepy."

"Really? I thought you were waiting to see the sunrise."

"No. You thought wrong. And this balcony is not east facing."

Arnav chuckled again.

"Ok Ms. Compass. Go & sleep."

"Let me go first."

"I will but I have a condition."

"What?"

Arnav smirked again making Khushi gulp. Suddenly, the air stirred. They were so engrossed in their new found connection that they hardly noticed the other in the past hour. They again slowly started to become aware of their closeness. The fire was dimmed but never lost.

Arnav had just properly noticed what Khushi was wearing when she was walking away. She was in her red petticoat and an oversized white shirt which apparently was his. The sleeves were folded below the elbow and her red glass bangles were still on her hands. Her face was mostly makeup free .. just a bit of smeared kajal around her honey eyes and a red bindi still in her forehead. Her long hair was tucked in a messy bun. Overall it was a strange view of a strange damsel; strange yet beautiful.

Arnav was holding her hands by his left hand on her back. He used the other hand to free her hair and let it fall. A startled Khushi looked up to meet his eyes and tried to gauge his intention.

"Aab thik hain," Arnav said with a half smile in his husky voice.

"What are you up to?" Khushi could not hide the nervousness in her voice. She was again having those out of the world sensations that always made her lose her senses.

"Nothing. Just ..," Arnav brought his face closer to her and slowly approached her cheek. Khushi closed her eyes in anticipation. Her breathing got heavy. She felt her knees again about to melt. She could feel his warm breath over her cheek .. a faint smell of his cologne numbed her senses. She was killed.

"Good Night, Khushi."

The husky murmur made Khushi shiver but flustered her more in a few seconds. Good Night?

She felt Arnav moving away and she opened her eyes. Arnav was giving her a naughty lopsided smile – enjoying every bit of her flustered state.

"Good Night, Khushi"

"Yes. Good Night, Arnav."

Khushi left and walked into her bedroom without turning to see him once. She was not sure if she was red with embarrassment or anger or disappointment.

"Arnav Singh Raizada," Khushi grumbled, "I am not letting you anywhere near me. Just see."

Arnav lay awake in his bed with his hands below his head. How difficult it was to walk away from that woman! He never knew exercising self-restraint could ever prove to be so hard for him. But he wanted her to trust him. He wanted her to know it was not only their physical closeness that mattered. Yes, it killed him to be away from her – to not be able to touch her. But it would kill him more if she thought that was all that mattered to him. Khushi Kumari Gupta was more – much, much more than a beautiful woman. He wanted her .. but he wanted the whole of her.

Incessant knocks on his door broke through his reverie. There was no one in the apartment but Khushi. Arnav, so, got a bit concerned and quickly opened the door.

"Move," Khushi ordered him even before he could open his mouth. She marched into the room, got into the bed and rested her head on the pillow as she lied down.

"What are you doing," a surprised Arnav tried to figure what Khushi was up to.

"I hate sleeping alone."

"So you want to sleep here?"

"Yes. Do you have any problem?"

"Noo .. No. Not at all."

"Good. Good night."

Arnav stood for a minute watching Khushi lying with her eyes closed. What was wrong with her? "Crazy woman," was all Arnav managed to mutter before he lied down beside her on the King bed. Arnav turned to his left with his back towards Khushi and lied almost motionless, totally aware of Khushi's every move. He could feel her moving continuously and after a few minutes he could feel her sit up on the bed.

"Get up, Arnav."

"Why," Arnav replied cautiously still lying on his side.

"Get up, naa!"

"First tell me why," Arnav turned to face her and lied on his back.

"I can't sleep on the right side of the bed."

"Neither can I, Khushi."

"Sooo? I am your guest. Move."

Arnav was about to give in but then it suddenly occurred to him. Why was he was giving in again? And .. why in the first place, she came to sleep in his room?

"I am not moving, Khushi," Arnav tried to sound irked, "This is my room. If you want to sleep on the left, you can go sleep in any other room."

Arnav saw Khushi frown and open her mouth to respond and he quickly added, "And if you pester more, I am deducting your score."

"Score," Khushi got a bit confused before she remembered. And she lost all control.

Arnav was all startled by the sudden attack on him as Khushi jumped on him and sat over his thighs with her legs on his sides. She grabbed him by his neck with her both hands and started shaking roughly.

"You think I care about my score? You really think that? What do you think of yourself? You think I care? You think I care if you are near me? You think I care if you kiss me? I don't .. I don't. Get that in your head, Arnav Singh Raizada. I don't .."

Arnav stared at Khushi in shock as he heard her lashing out on him. Her slender fingers were not doing much harm to his neck .. or perhaps he was not just feeling anything. He felt a strange feeling warming up his heart. She was angry. She was frustrated. She hated this as much as he hated. They hated being away from each other.

He stared at the roaring lioness all mesmerized .. her disheveled hair, slightly teary eyes .. her flushed cheeks, puffed nostrils .. the sound of her bangles around his neck as they clattered .. crazy .. and beautiful. He felt her fingers loosening and in seconds, she was lying under him as he rolled over and sat over her now with his strong legs on her sides.

"Let me go! Let me go .. I don't want to sleep here. Why did I come here. Oh Devi Maiya! Let me .."

Arnav did not let her finish as he sealed her mouth with his own. She had talked enough for one night. It was time he shut her up.

Khushi tried to move away. She did not want this. She did not want him near her. She tried to break the kiss as much as possible but then she found a better way to let go of her bottled up frustration.

Arnav was startled for a second as Khushi suddenly stopped resisting and bit him hard on his bottom lip. And then he felt her going inside his mouth. His brain stopped working instantly. The next few minutes flew away as they kept freeing their frustration & confusion. There was no better way to let each other know how much they hated being away from each other.

It was Arnav who broke the kiss as he got out of breath. He settled himself half-lying over her with his right elbow on her left. With the other hand, he started slowly moving aside the loose tendrils of hair from her face. He admired her flushed face with a half-smile and watched her breathing heavily, still with her eyes closed. Arnav noticed the tear stains on the corner of her eyes and kissed the tears away gently.

"You are crazy .. you know that?" he said softly.

Khushi opened her eyes and got lost into a pair of bright coffee eyes. Her eyes feasted on the man so near her. His lucid eyes, silky ruffled hair .. soft stubble that was heavier than usual .. sharp nose, immaculate lips .. glowing skin .. killer neck .. the vivid movement of the Adam apple as he swallowed .. All he was trying to do was to stay true to his word. Why did she lose it?

"I know. How else would I have ended up here like this?"

Arnav could not but laugh watching her all pouty and whining.

"I like crazy," Arnav nuzzled against her left ear softly. He heard her moan almost inaudibly.

"Let me go, Arnav," she wiggled slightly.

"Are you sure," Arnav's nose was still busy with her ear.

"Yyyes," Khushi said with difficulty. Her breathing hitched.

"You are not going anywhere, Khushi," Arnav kept his nose busy, "Until you fulfill my condition."

"Whhaaat," was all Khushi could manage.

"Call me baby," he murmured, "One more time."

Khushi opened her eyes in shock.

"What," Arnav smirked as he gave her ear some rest and faced her, "You thought I did not hear it?"

Khushi remembered & blushed.

"Arnav .. look at me .. what is wrong, baby? Arnav ..??"

"I .. I cant. Let me go."

"I cant let you go too."

"Please, Arnav. We should really sleep. It is almost half past 3."

"Sleep here. With me. Like this."

Khushi swallowed.

"Like this? I .. I cant sleep if you are over me like this .."

Arnav shifted his body on her left, turned to her as he rested his head on the pillow and grabbed her by his waist to bring her near her.

Khushi's back crashed on his chest. She felt Arnav pulling her closer with his arm across her tummy. She felt his warm breath on her nape. How would she sleep?

"Sleep Khushi," she heard him murmur before he pecked her nape softly.

Khushi was sure by now.

There was no way she was going to sleep tonight.