It was way past midnight, Ragini had been counting hours but sleep had evaded her '..May be her mind wanted her to face her demons, look inside her own heart and come to term with lots of things.
She kept tossing and turning; finally she gave up and threw the soft blanket away. She felt a sudden loss; the soft blanket had smelled of him, his fragrance was lingering in it from his afternoon nap.
She pulled the blanket back to herself and dug her face inside it, inhaling deeply.
After 5 minutes or so she lifted her head up and felt much calmer, she got up and sat on his sofa'wrapping the kambal around herself ,even the sofa held his warmth ,she looked around in the room everywhere ,in every corner his warmth was visible.
She got up and paced around the room absently and something struck her like lightening'.the thought was so sudden that it left her with a electrical jolt and she trembled from the effect'
In slow motion she moved towards the same sofa where he had spent 7 years''and she had spent a night few days ago; even then she had not been able to realize her inner turmoil'
She sat on floor and touched the place where he used to keep his pillow; the uncomfortable antique sofa stared at her accusingly, reminding her of her own self-centered existence these past years'.
In my own grief I never thought of his basic comforts even, she wanted to run to hospital and ask him to make her go through what he had endured these past years'.never once he had demanded of his husbandly rights;
A bitter laugh rang out in quiet of the night'husbandly rights'''he never even had humanitarian rights..Thanks to me she thought bitterly.
Kis kis cheez ki maafi mangungi'would the words even mean anything
May be I should show him how much he matters to me''.
Shabdon ka kya hai''sorry and thank you are for strangers but he is my own,mera Sirf mera ,
I would show him..He will understand by himself'..he needs a choice I won't judge or try to play mahaan like last time; instead I would let him be the guiding light'.
The whole house was alive with activity. Mummyji was running around to make sure Soup was perfect; while kids were fussing around Papaji. The whole room was full of flowers and get well soon cards.
Ragini was trying to catch a glimpse of Anmol; she had not been able to say a word in private in past week. He spent nights at hospital and during day he came for short time to sleep. She was worried about dark circles around his eyes,she had caught him frowning with annoyance few times when kids were shouting ;he seemed distant and withdrawn, pre-occupied.
The whole up notched activity was giving Anmol a huge migraine. He went out and sat by the fountain, its soothing and timeless rhythm working on his agitated nerves; he was dreading the nightfall and the bedroom. Ragini was so unpredictable that he had given up on any hopes from her; she changed like pendulum'one minute she would hug him as if there was no tomorrow and in other moment she would become a stranger.
He shook his head and stared at sparkling water, sunlight played its magic and tiny sparkles and prisms created a beautiful world of illusion. He looked at those sparkles and thought about his life'.was his life a illusion a beautiful existence to bring light into others lives but then disappear like these illusions of light'..was he around in this house to play a savior or to prove his usefulness again and again.
He was so engorged in watching the display that he did not hear her soft footsteps , Ragini looked at his intent expressions and tried to see what he was looking at '.
Kya soch rahe ho'
Hmm o tum kab aayi
Abhi
Kya soch rahe they..
She lowered herself on bench beside him gesturing him to move to one side and looked at him again
HE was again lost watching fountain'
She put her hand on his arm gently and asked again kya dekh rahe they
Ragini look at those particles of mist, see how they sparkle in sunlight
Just like diamonds, lighting up this fountain briefly and then they disappear'.they have no existence, their whole purpose is to bring light into our lives'
She looked at him and saw he was now looking at her with a strange expression, vulnerability written over his face, his lips were trembling with effort, something shifted in her heart and she swallowed visibly.
I feel I am like those particles'..make others life beautiful for a moment and then ''.forgotten discarded'.
Ragini was frozen ; she looked at him in confusion
He got up removingher hand away a bit more roughly than he intended;and stood up harshly inhaling ;one hand in his hair he turned and looked back at her ''
Edited by sami01 - 14 years ago
Fan Fictions
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Pati Patni Aur Panga
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