If Only || AM FF *updated 28 Sep! Ch links on pg.1

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desi chic

@desi chic

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 17 years ago

#121

Arti meri jaan! Wah... dil ki baatein toh dil hi jaane, but you sure as heck know something about "love" the way you express it here!👏 Really enjoyed the descriptions of the area, I've never been there, so I was seeing it through your words... and it sounds serene. Also, the scene with AM at the terrace was lovely, very peaceful... almost too much so. Shruti's doubts have me in doubts I almost find myself sympathizing with Kajal, actually I do. I hated Garima, but Kajal is different. Stupid Chaya yaar... isse koi kaam hi nahin!😡... Percy and Tannu's encounters are always a treat. I liked how you described her... she's dynamic, and he makes her insecure.😳 Now for a lawyer!... Hmm, who could that be...

👏

Cheers,
dc

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Arti

@--arti--

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 17 years ago

#122

I've changed the links in the first page, so they should all link correctly now! Hope IF format doesn't change yet again! Confused

Writing updates, so coming up soon, in the next couple of days! Thanks to my awesome readers who are so patient and so sweet! 😉

Originally posted by: desi chic
Arti meri jaan! Wah... dil ki baatein toh dil hi jaane, but you sure as heck know something about "love" the way you express it here!👏 Really enjoyed the descriptions of the area, I've never been there, so I was seeing it through your words... and it sounds serene. Also, the scene with AM at the terrace was lovely, very peaceful... almost too much so. Shruti's doubts have me in doubts I almost find myself sympathizing with Kajal, actually I do. I hated Garima, but Kajal is different. Stupid Chaya yaar... isse koi kaam hi nahin!😡... Percy and Tannu's encounters are always a treat. I liked how you described her... she's dynamic, and he makes her insecure.😳 Now for a lawyer!... Hmm, who could that be...

👏

Cheers,
dc

DC, you are so sweet! I'm flattered you like it! I am glad you enjoyed the descriptions! Yeah, the terrace scene was my fav.. I wanted to write it in an underplayed and subtle way, but the whole time I was writing it, I was like *grinnn* 🥰

- arti

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desi chic

@desi chic

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 17 years ago

#123

Originally posted by: --arti--
I've changed the links in the first page, so they should all link correctly now! Hope IF format doesn't change yet again!

Writing updates, so coming up soon, in the next couple of days! Thanks to my awesome readers who are so patient and so sweet! 😉

DC, you are so sweet! I'm flattered you like it! I am glad you enjoyed the descriptions! Yeah, the terrace scene was my fav.. I wanted to write it in an underplayed and subtle way, but the whole time I was writing it, I was like *grinnn* 🥰

- arti

😆😆 It was beautiful... nothing more, nothing less. I've written a terrace scene as well... for a different couple... the dynamics were different as well... but I randomally remembered it!😆 But seriously dude, you're wonderful at what you do~

Cheers,
dc

😆

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Sadia87

@Sadia87

Voyager

Posted: 17 years ago

#124

hey! where u at?!?! plz update soon!

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desi chic

@desi chic

Sparkler

+ 3

Posted: 17 years ago

#125

Arti ji... update karne ki maari gum shudaa...!!😕

Cheers,
dc

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Arti

@--arti--

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 17 years ago

#126

Hey guys.. I am finally writing an update for If Only! Sorry for the long absence.. I wrote a series of chapters really quickly because all of that was in my head, but beyond that point I hit a block.

In a few hours, I will finish the update and will post it.

Hope you guys still remember the story.. look in the first page for short chapter descriptions! 😊

- arti

Edited by --arti-- - 17 years ago

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Arti

@--arti--

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 17 years ago

#127

Aaj se Percy Wadia's character, aka Tanu's bandwaala, will be played by the following hottie:

Edited by --arti-- - 17 years ago

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Arti

@--arti--

Voyager

+ 2

Posted: 17 years ago

#128

*Note: Percy's character will be played by a different actor from now on!

CHAPTER 16
The first fight

Maithili quietly cried into her pillow. Earlier in the day, she had seen Adi and Kajal together which had cast doubt on everything she took for granted.

She had seen Adi talking to Kajal at the reception the Mehras held a little while ago. And now, when she had seen her in his arms, confessing her love no less, Maithili's bewilderment quickly turned into confusion, and then feelings of betrayal.

Maithili had stood frozen, trying not to make a sound. She felt anger rise up from deep within her. Suddenly, she was full of hatred for herself. For trusting Adi. For being so swept up in her emotions that she let things happen so fast between them. She tried to command her body to walk up to him, to confront him, but she couldn't. She had the keen sense that she would be intruding on them, and that she already was intruding on them by just being there and gazing at them in shock. This feeling, that Adi had suddenly become a stranger to her, was unbearable to Maithili.

These thoughts continuously circled in her head as she cried into the pillow. She tried to make an excuse to avoid the picnic earlier in the day, but since everyone insisted, she had gone and kept a safe distance from Adi, who acted like everything was normal though he was clearly shaken up by something.

Ever since they got home, Maithili had feigned sickness and stayed confined to her bed. She desperately needed some fresh air and headed towards the terrace to share her tears with the night sky. She suddenly felt his hands brush against her waist a second before he encircled her in his arms from behind.

"Are you feeling better now?" he spoke gently into her ear from behind her, with his warm breath creating a halo over her ear.

She turned around and clinically withdrew from him, yet trying to act as normal as possible. She saw worry in his brow as he peered into her eyes, but she would not lose her strength.

"Yes. How about you?"

"I'm fine, of course, more than just fine," he said and cast her a mischievous smile before he pulled her body back towards him. She felt his lips inch closer and closer to her ear, and in the moment he gently pulled her ear into his lips, she nearly forgot about her anger. Her breath quickened. She would have to stop this. She withdrew again.

"Are you sure you're fine? You looked like something was bothering you all day," she continued. She was determined to get the truth out of him.
He paused thoughtfully for a second. Then recomposed himself and nodded his head calmly. "I was just a little tired. Nothing bothering me or anything like that. Things are perfect." He ended his sentence with a quick kiss on her forehead.
"Really? So everything that happened today with Kajal didn't really happen. I just imagined the whole thing, right?"

He looked at her in shock, and saw that her face was reddened and her voice, tearful.

"Maithili… it's not what it looks like. Kajal and I were together, yes, but that was in the past…and I don't why she hasn't let go yet."
"Is that why you have never mentioned it? And forget that… you were lying to me just now," she said with a pained look on her face. Her voice was brimming with sensitivity and hurt, which Adi could sense. He suddenly felt helpless that he couldn't stop her from feeling hurt.

"I'm sorry…I just didn't want you to worry," he whispered to her, trying to bring her close to him again.
"No, Adi, I'm not a child," she moved away and continued, "you know how worried I was about having things go this fast between us… you just don't understand, not everyone is like you, not everyone can take everything so lightly," she said as she turned her face away from his.
He was hurt. "You think I take us lightly?"
She paused for a moment, knowing that she had hurt him by saying this. She still faced away from him. "I need time. I feel so stupid right now." Her voice shrank as she continued, "I just want to be home. I want to leave."
Before he could say more, she ran downstairs and into her room.

Adi mentally kicked himself for royally messing up this situation. He knew how vulnerable she had been with him, and knowing how sensitive Maithili was to begin with, he should have been more up front with her. At the same time, he felt helpless. It was precisely because he was concerned about her that he had kept it from her. He wanted to run after her, and felt just as helpless as he felt the time he had hurt her at the SAG office. Those tears again, and the same vulnerability. In that moment, he knew he could do anything, anything to make her feel better. But all said and done, he couldn't go downstairs and knock on her door because that might wake everyone up. He stayed on in the terrace for the next hour or so, hoping she would return. She never did.

* * *

"Shhh…"
He came closer and closer. Her eyelashes involuntarily fluttered helplessly, and as she felt his voice travel into her ear, her body was nearly shivering with desire. She couldn't control it anymore, and let herself hold him eagerly. She felt his warm and muscular body clasp hers. That her body seemed to fit so perfectly into his felt heavenly. And then…

Tanu's squinted eyes tried to focus on the clock by her bed. 3 am. She had been sweating. It was only a few seconds after getting up that she realized she had been dreaming about Percy. A deep red blush overtook her face. She had to acknowledge that she was really attracted to Percy. She now realized that she had been thinking about him all day. She was finding herself worried about him, wondering where he was staying in Mussoorie…and not to mention, insanely attracted to him.

Tanu glanced at the clock again, frustrated with her attempts in vain to fall asleep. Every time she closed her eyes, she was haunted with the image…no, the feeling, of his finger brushing against her lips.

As if by divine coordination, at the same time of the night in Krishna Dadi's house Percy could not sleep that night either, though most of his thoughts consisted of worries about how to help Kajal with her problems. After her emotional run-in with Adi earlier in the day, and his brusque dismissal of her, she was feeling even more broken down than usual.

On the other end, Tanu lay awake wondering if she would run into Percy again. Unsure of how to find him, she made up her mind that she would go back to that pharmacy to see if she could find out where he was staying. She still felt bad about how she had derided him without finding out why he was there. Still… that was the only reason she wanted to see him.

* * *

In the morning, Maithili was helping Parvati Dadi make breakfast, putting on an appearance of calm and comfort even though her mind was clouded with thoughts of anger towards Adi. That he had lied to her to apparently protect her from the truth just made her even angrier… how could he treat her like that? The warm heat rising from the kadai on the stove brought her back to the present. She gently placed the hot puris onto a nearby container.
"Wah Maithili, bahut achhe puriyaan bana leti ho beta," Parvati said warmly. "Acchi baat hai.. waise Shruti ko puri banana bilkul nahin aata!"
Maithili smiled shyly. She was really getting along with Parvati and basking in the warmth of the Mehra family. She had noted that Shruti was acting a little distant from Maithili ever since they arrived, but even Shruti was relaxing more and more around Maithili.
From the outside, it seemed like things were going perfectly on this trip. But the rift that had formed between Maithili and Adi was not visible to anyone. It's not like they had much choice since they couldn't act like they were angry with each other in front of the family anyway. Maithili nearly got a headache thinking about how she would manage to act as if everything was fine until this trip was over.

A few minutes later, they had all gathered for breakfast. As everyone enjoyed the breakfast, Parvati made it a point to announce that Maithili had made the puris.
"Wah, kya puriyan hain.. excellent, mindblowing," said Adi, much to everyone's amusement except Maithili's. She glared at him, trying to almost telepathically communicate, they-were-not-for-you…and adding, jerk!
Adi reluctantly comprehended this gesture, but continued to scarf down Maithili's puris.

At the end of breakfast, Kamal told everyone that he had to go back to Mumbai for an important emergency business meeting, and wouldn't be able to spend the rest of the 2 weeks with them.
"Maithili beta, tum yahan par ruk jaao..?" Kamal said.
"Haan papa, I'll stay here and join you in Mumbai later," Maithili said feigning enthusiasm.
"Of course.. aap is tarah se hume chhod ke jaayenge to kya Mitu ko bhi saath le jayenge? She's definitely staying!" Shruti added with a smile.
Everyone smiled at the emergence of Shruti's nickname for Maithili. Parvati smiled at the affection Shruti was developing for Maithili, while Adi's smiling eyes stayed fixed on Maithili.

After breakfast, everyone dispersed to get to their schedule for the day. Parvati asked if Tanu and Maithili wanted to go to the temple, but each had their own excuse for not going. Maithili complained of a headache, and Tanu stammered about looking for an old friend, fidgeting about uncertainly. Maithili spent the rest of the morning in Kamal's room, helping him pack and say goodbye to her dad. It was decided that Suyash, Parvati, and Shruti would drop him off at the airport. Maithili nervously smiled at this suggestion, because the elders made it seem like they wanted to discuss some kind of rishte-ki-baat. After they had left, Adi got a moment alone with Maithili.

"I'm glad you're staying," he smiled at her, "I know everything will be okay."
She stared at him, with disbelief at this display of his over-confidence.
"How can you assume that I've forgiven you Adi? I haven't. And for your information, I stayed so papa wouldn't find out about anything, and to make Shruti Aunty and Parvati Dadi happy. Not for you. Got it?" she shot back at him.
Adi sighed as he spoke, "achcha baba, you're angry with me…but at some point, you have to forgive me, right? That's good enough for me. Waise I happen to think you're damn sexy when you're angry at me…kind of like the old college-waali baat."
Even before he could finish his sentence, more anger accumulated on Maithili's face. She pushed him away from her and walked towards Tanu, impatiently trying to include herself in Tanu's plans for the day, to which Tanu reluctantly agreed.

Adi looked after Maithili desirously as she walked away. Even though he was sincerely hoping that she forgives him soon, he really did like it when she was angry with him. "Ah lovers' tiffs," Adi whispered to himself as he walked away.

Edited by --arti-- - 17 years ago