Originally posted by: mpks1
Deeps, like you I really want her to talk to him, now that he is calm and follows Gautam's advice that if you don't have nice things to say then don't talk but I am sure he will listen to what Raavi has to say this time, if she said the exact same thing she said to Dhara today. She doesn't understand him at all. She is holding on to adjustments and compromise , 2 things that you should not start a relationship with.
So just like how she thinks that his insecurities and inferiority complex, him being weak is ruining everything between them, Shiva has every right to think that she need not adjust or compromise for him and hence did what we all saw. I am sure adjustments and compromise turned him off😕
As we never get any clear monologue from Raavi, one thing I could conclude today is that she is definitely not in love with him and I am not sure about the like part also. I got a feeling that she is indifferent now.
I admit that Raavi may not have any, and I mean any, romantic feelings for Shiva. But pre marriage, she did respect him. Yes, she was frightened by his rash nature whenever he pushed her too far, but you don't go fight toe to toe with someone you don't trust and respect (at least to an extent) when you know how extreme they can be....
Even post marriage, she still trusted him to save her. During the kidnapping sequence, and again post khandar. So, there was trust, respect, and a clear physical attraction (prior to the Sneha and diary kaand at least).
Now, was there understanding? Absolutely not. Shiva understood Raavi, to an extent, because she'd never bothered to hide anything from him. Raavi knew that there was a soft Shiva, this amazing person in him, but she'd only ever seen the firecracker side of him, and her trust stems more from the fact that Shiva would never let her get hurt (wouldn't let anyone else hurt her, at least). She believes he has a good heart (refer haldi and matki breaking episode) and that she will become privy to it post wedding.
Instead what happens? Her wedding to Dev breaks, and she is emotionally put in a spot and forced into a wedding with Shiva (to be clear, I blame both Dhara and Mausa pa for this). The final choice was hers, yes, but she wasn't in the right headspace to be thinking about a decision as big as marriage right then.
There is one thing I blame Shiva for. Not having a conversation with Raavi before the wedding. Shiva wasn't put on the spot the way Raavi was. Yes, his family's reputation was at stake, but he wasn't being coerced into it. He had been given an open choice, and I don't think Dhara would have forced him if he had said no And even if she had, Gaumbi wouldn't have let her (because he was against the match, if I'm remembering right). Shiva could've taken a moment to talk to her, to make sure she was ready for their marriage, to chalk out the basic expectations he had from a wedding to her, to figure out what Raavi wanted from him right then in that rushed marriage. He could have done it if he wanted to, but he didn't even see beyond his mahaan bhabhi maa and her mahaan request.
This is one of the reasons I love this track so much, that Shiva's priority is now Raavi, very clearly. But, if I were Raavi and had no idea about any of this? I would not dare take the first step towards him. Let's look at this from Raavi's point of view:
a) Shiva saved her life. He's done it before too. So, an act of humanity.
b) He agrees to the wedding. I don't know why. Rationally thinking later on, for his babhi's reputation.
c) He abandoned me too. He must really hate me. But I agreed to this wedding, so I'll pull through it.
d) He didn't abandon me. He told me he wasn't a selfish person. Another act of humanity for a childhood enemy.
e) We were almost back to that nok-jhok waala normal, but now he's pissed at me because of Sneha.
f) He read my diary. But that was an old diary. I've changed, so has my point of view. I don't mind those things anymore.
g) Dhara di was right. I should probably talk to him.
h) I tried talking to him. Told him I was willing to adjust, to compromise, to make this wedding work. I don't think I'm getting through though. I should try harder.
h) I probably shouldn't introduce Shiva to my friends. What if he shouts at them too? Silence is probably the best strategy here. He keeps moving away from me.
I) He disrespected me in front of the whole town. And then he refused to apologise. Back to being enemies it is. It's not like I understand him enough for anything more anyways. He was probably affected by my friend's words, but am I sure?
j) He said he wants freedom from me. He doesn't want me. He's let go of me before, but not like this. Never like this. I won't burden him with myself anymore.
PAUSE
This is how I assume Raavi's thought process to have been. Is it flawed, yes. But for a girl with zero relationship experience, expecting the worst, it's not the worst. Am I saying it's all Shiva's mistake? Absolutely not. I'm just saying that at this point, I wouldn't move back toward him for anything, unless he made the first step. Unless I knew there is something to fight for, whether or not things will work out.
PS My morning essay is complete .Now I am going to go help my mum around the house before she decides to kick me out of the house 😆.
Anupamaa
