Word sexual harassment and Extra Marital Affair - Page 2

Originally posted by: MSgayatri

👏👏👏

Everyone is jumping to conclusions.... And EMA and harassment is becoming Favourite word of the week

Ninad, I thought did not mean EMA, it was the basic care that an elder gives to the younger ones in the family... It is emotional attachment and care... Nthin else....

Pakhi helping virat, only that much part is care, but her overall behaviour is weird...

I loved your content thought.... If we keep the show aside, wat u are saying is obvious practical life.... We are getting quite keen to speak ill of one person and not see the larger picture of basic purpose in any action... She has become a punching bag of sorts.....

I have also mentioned both the cases in my previous and recent posts..

Where was the care when that guy in weak voice kept asking about Sai and kept coughing and yet she denied answering till he persisted.. ..instead of calling the doctor she wanted to be praised for standing on feet..is it not what we do when the patient is conscious after 12-14 hr of being unconscious to check the vitals? Where was the concern when he removed his mask and was talking with difficulty and she not even asked once to put it back.. where was the concern when he requested her to step out since it was not fine for her to be their in the absence of their respective spouses....and she wanted him to clarify again and again her position in life compared to Sai.. Where was the concern when she said she would do what she thinks is right deciding to stay back when he denied her to even be in that room?

The harassment is not only about physical things. Forcing herself into virat's space when he is clearly asking her to leave is also harassment. She is only getting worse. It was not called out as harassment by many including me until now coz virat until now did not stop her. But now he is clearly telling her to leave him. And she is also doing it with the intention of more than friend. In her head he is still her lover. So its wrong on ALL levels. She is not only interested in an EMA but also harassing him emotionally. Right now they have both not become "physical" but emotional infidelity is also equally immoral imo. People might be in an open marriage and be ok with it but here virat is finally drawing boundaries. Until now he was giving mixed signals. But pp is clear that she wants to be more than friends. For now she cant do anything except keep saying she is bff, kareebi dosti. But if virat was not married, and showed the slightest hint that he was available she would pounce on it.

Scenario changed: Imagine if Virat was a woman and Pakhi a man? Will we still view it from the same lens. No right? EMA is not only sexual but emotional EMA also exists. What Pakhi and Virat clearly latch on to is a form of emotional EMA. Unhealthy

Hence, question answered. Trying to take a space between a married couple is EMA and touching someone without having CONSENT is harassment sexual or otherwise.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

I have also mentioned both the cases in my previous and recent posts..

Where was the care when that guy in weak voice kept asking about Sai and kept coughing and yet she denied answering till he persisted.. ..instead of calling the doctor she wanted to be praised for standing on feet..is it not what we do when the patient is conscious after 12-14 hr of being unconscious to check the vitals? Where was the concern when he removed his mask and was talking with difficulty and she not even asked once to put it back.. where was the concern when he requested her to step out since it was not fine for her to be their in the absence of their respective spouses....and she wanted him to clarify again and again her position in life compared to Sai.. Where was the concern when she said she would do what she thinks is right deciding to stay back when he denied her to even be in that room?

Agreed .... I made a post today with the above points. The name of the post is "yeh aurat kitna jhut bolti hai"

So I dnt support the psycho behaviour of this female...

https://www.indiaforums.com/forum/ghum-hai-kisikey-pyaar-meiin/5224561/yeh-aurat-kitna-jhut-bolti-hai

Originally posted by: Saichintalli

I completely agree with ninad Kaku part , yes they are not pointing towards EMA but ninad want to make pakhi as Kaku in virat's life....

But while coming to sexual harassment thing...

Yes she is helping virat , no denail in that front but she is mentally harassing him, just imagine a girl in virat's place with her ex in the room behaving the same... If you are not comfortable even touching shoulder is inappropriate.... If we only consider pakhi helping scene , it seems like helping but nothing else, but if we see the whole situation then don't you think it is bad, stopping a mother ( ignoring her kind of not stopping aai)and a wife from coming to him and then staying in his room when she clearly know he is uncomfortable with this act and trying to caressing his hair....

I agree for her it's love but according to me if the person is not comfortable with our touch , it's wrong, don't you think so, it might not completely come under sexual harassment but it do come under harassment.

I would in general would not like to be 'helped', touched by someone who I have asked to stay away from.. The point we are forgetting is she did not easily step out when Virat wanted her to,,, Twice he got away from her touch today..

Have a bit of a long reply:

So, Sexual Harassment, as defined by law does not only include the physical act. It also includes the intention of pursuing someone for a relationship, marriage etc without intending to "rape" (a woman, by law, because men are not seen as victims of sexual harassment in India). But one can't say that because someone touched unintentionally but is being stubborn about stalking/being in physical proximity to the person despite their refusal it is not sexual harassment.

Groping and touching inappropriately obviously constitute sexual harassment, but that is just the tip of the iceberg. Even someone (a man) without having any intentions of being in a relationship (with a woman) just touching the person in an act of anger, in a physical fight etc is treated as "sexual harassment". Recently, there was a case where a male Minister of a state touched the collar of a woman doctor while arguing with her and he was accused of sexual harassment.

Here is what constitutes as "SEXUAL HARASSMENT" by law:
a) Physical contact and advances (so, you can’t touch someone inappropriately and think I am innocent because, you know, I didn’t rape)

b) A demand or request for sexual favours

c) Making sexually coloured remarks (so, no sexist jokes or misogynist humour)

d) Showing po-graphy

e) Any other unwelcome physical, verbal or non-verbal conduct of sexual nature.

Laws under Indian Penal Code (IPC)

Section 354 (A): A man committing any physical contact, advances involving unwelcome and explicit sexual overtures; or demanding or requesting sexual favours; or showing po-graphy against the will of a woman; or making sexually coloured remarks, shall be guilty of the offence of sexual harassment.

Section 209: Obscene acts in any public place, singing obscene songs to the annoyance of others (Punishment: Imprisonment for a term of up to 3 months or fine, or both).

Section 509: Uttering any word or making any gesture intended to insult the modesty of a woman. (Words like: item, mast, maal etc..)

So unfortunately men are not seen as victims because law thinks "women cannot rape"... the law is written assuming that the victim is a woman and the perpetrator is a man. But, if you apply these parameters in principle, then questions like:

"Meri life me tumhari kya jagah hai?"

"Sai mein aisa kya hai jo mujh me nahi hai?"

"Main tumhare bedroom mein dinner kyun nahi khaa sakti?"

"Tum apni biwi ke saath apne bedroom mein special moment mana sakte ho... toh ye moment special kyun nahi ho sakta?"
"Tumhari biwi hoti toh usse bhi jaane ko kehte?"
"Hamare guzre huye rishtey ko mat jhootlaao"
actually, amount to sexual harassment because they are pushing the person into a relationship he/she doesn't want -- as per the definitions laid down in law and not because we are replused by the woman in the story.

SInce long time they are indicating that there is more than just devaar bhabhi relationship between Ninad and Bhavani. Ashwini indirectly said it many times. Even today she was like why does this family do things they shouldn't do. Sai also speculated how Kaku and Ninad were into a weird relationship. Even Virat instead of giving shocked look he was more like Sai stop don't bring that topic in here. 😕 It's good to portray that devaar bhabhi special bond. (Recently I watched a few episode of Anupamaa and there Samar and Kinjal share that beautiful bhabhi devaar relationship. Can you believe it they even fed each other. But it wasn't cringy. Why ? Because it was clear from the beginning.) But with Ghum they made it look cringy and weird and awkward. No wonder fans are using that EMA tag for them. 🤢

Same for Virakhi. The way they close their eyes on Pakhi's behavior. It looks like they don't mind if Virakhi are sharing the same kind of relationship. So again it's awkward and really cringy. Which family would send a devaar bhabhi on a trip not only for the paperwork but also enjoy the nature. Which family would have a problem if the devaar's wife is going with them. They should be happy instead as no chances of MUs.

The man is unconscious and she knows that she was asked to stay away from him yet she crosses the limits by touching him. Why is it necessary to touch his forehead ? Was she checking his temperature ? 😆 Was it out of concern ? No none of that. She was just emotional that the man she loves is in a hospital bed. When someone is telling her that they should respect their bhabhi devaar relationship then why get touchy feely like this. 😕 If I am telling someone not to cross their limits and the person is still crossing it by the name of concern, I would definitely feel uncomfortable. And where there is uneasiness there is harassment.

Originally posted by: asmi_joya

Genuine question..

Reverse the situation... We have a Jija in love with his sali .. Jija's wife is MIA.. The Sali has clearly told she is not interested in him and asked him to stay away.. Circumstances land her into hospital after she has had a fight with her husband ... Jija does not let the husband enter.. stays with sali in the ICU in the name of taking care of her...touches her forehead with love, while she is unconscious and does not know she is being touched by someone who she has asked to keep a distance.. Next day Jija helps her lie down and does not leave her hand... tries to touch it with other hand and the lady aggressively removes her hand.. and asks him to not be present in the room when her husband is not there.. Tells him its not right and that she would like to see her husband.. The Jeeja after a lot of denying and berating her for not seeing his concern for her... goes out but saying he will do what he finds right and yet again decided to stay back.. and yet again stops the husband to take care of his own wife..

What do we call it Harassment? Help? Concern? Humanity? Its not just the scene in particular but considering what has happened in the last two days.. Where do we put Pakhi's behaviour..

So u mean to say, the Sali also gave mixed reactions to the jija, the Sali dint dared to stop the jija from humiliating her husband, and the Sali was kind enough to trash her husband like piece of shit and then when she realised Arre Mera pati tho bekasur hai, jija becomes bad,

what ever u saying I am not denying, I am just saying that this wanst harassment, concern, help nor humanity, what Pakhi wanted if u have seen a yesterday’s episode all she wanted acknowledgement from Virat which she dint got that’s one of the reasons she pointed out what she has done foe Virat while staying with him,

the problem is that she wants importance in Virat’s life she wants a say in Virat’s life, and honestly this would not have been started if she was stopped at the very first instance, which she was not,

Virat was offended that Pakhi left the home, he went her to get back, he even shouted and blamed sai, eventually sai had to bring her back stating Virat is not fine, that time too Virat had VC that sai must be thinking I am concerned about Pakhi so why dint he cleared her, till today sai thinks Virat loves Pakhi why thts coz Virat never cleared her,

Originally posted by: janhav

Have a bit of a long reply:

So, Sexual Harassment, as defined by law does not only include the physical act. It also includes the intention of pursuing someone for a relationship, marriage etc without intending to "rape" (a woman, by law, because men are not seen as victims of sexual harassment in India). But one can't say that because someone touched unintentionally but is being stubborn about stalking/being in physical proximity to the person despite their refusal it is not sexual harassment.

Groping and touching inappropriately obviously constitute sexual harassment, but that is just the tip of the iceberg. Even someone (a man) without having any intentions of being in a relationship (with a woman) just touching the person in an act of anger, in a physical fight etc is treated as "sexual harassment". Recently, there was a case where a male Minister of a state touched the collar of a woman doctor while arguing with her and he was accused of sexual harassment.

Here is what constitutes as "SEXUAL HARASSMENT" by law:
a) Physical contact and advances (so, you can’t touch someone inappropriately and think I am innocent because, you know, I didn’t rape)

b) A demand or request for sexual favours

c) Making sexually coloured remarks (so, no sexist jokes or misogynist humour)

d) Showing po-graphy

e) Any other unwelcome physical, verbal or non-verbal conduct of sexual nature.

Laws under Indian Penal Code (IPC)

Section 354 (A): A man committing any physical contact, advances involving unwelcome and explicit sexual overtures; or demanding or requesting sexual favours; or showing po-graphy against the will of a woman; or making sexually coloured remarks, shall be guilty of the offence of sexual harassment.

Section 209: Obscene acts in any public place, singing obscene songs to the annoyance of others (Punishment: Imprisonment for a term of up to 3 months or fine, or both).

Section 509: Uttering any word or making any gesture intended to insult the modesty of a woman. (Words like: item, mast, maal etc..)

So unfortunately men are not seen as victims because law thinks "women cannot rape"... the law is written assuming that the victim is a woman and the perpetrator is a man. But, if you apply these parameters in principle, then questions like:

"Meri life me tumhari kya jagah hai?"

"Sai mein aisa kya hai jo mujh me nahi hai?"

"Main tumhare bedroom mein dinner kyun nahi khaa sakti?"

"Tum apni biwi ke saath apne bedroom mein special moment mana sakte ho... toh ye moment special kyun nahi ho sakta?"
"Tumhari biwi hoti toh usse bhi jaane ko kehte?"
"Hamare guzre huye rishtey ko mat jhootlaao"
actually, amount to sexual harassment because they are pushing the person into a relationship he/she doesn't want -- as per the definitions laid down in law and not because we are replused by the woman in the story.

Thankyou Jhanki for pointing out..I was also aware of this law...but did not quote it as I did not think I have the necessary knowledge as far as laws are considered.. I believe what Pakhi did today.. considering what has happened in the last few days.. can be clubbed into physical harassment.. SHe has been very explicit with him , by chosing the right words..

I am not repulsed by Pakhi as a character.....she is a character a fictional one at that.And a wonderful character to play as an actor...But her actions cannot be called help or concern towards Virat as far as today's episode is concerned.. I vehemently deny to believe so..