Knock, Knock! Who's there? Pt 21/22 pg 80, 82 23/04 - Page 24

Chapter 9

With a 3 extra shot coffee from Cafe Nero, Maan made his way through the Haematology lobby and into the department office where his locker was situated.

'Morning Derek' he wished back swinging at the strong black coffee and started discussing the daily activities with the old man and the young newly employed female, Michelle; both were the administers of their relatively big group. The hospital had a huge pathology laboratory, 46 members itself worked in haematology which was the second largest team in comparison to Microbiology who had a 58 member team.

'Where's Barabara?' Anita asked walking through the door and freezing at Maan who smiled as usual

'She'll be a little late' answered Michelle looking at the embracing rue forming on her seniors cheek, everyone in the 7 member admin team talked of the lead Biomedical scientist and his appearance, the one that was now seated near Derek looking through a few cases before starting his 9:00am shift. Unknown of his attempt to stay away from the upper grounds where his lab and the possible gossip lay.

'She's bang out of order'

'I can't believe she cheated on him, that too with that Neil'

'I know especially after she pursued him for like decades'

'He's so hot, Sasha is an idiot'

It was very late in the morning when he heard the quiet whispering in the staff room, he had on purpose ignored going there however on Adi's persuasion on facing fears, he made a soft entry during his break and settled in the corner seat with a thick book to his face. Adi who sat beside left soon after due to some urgent blood sample checks.

'I heard Sasha and Neil were at it for months'

'Poor guy'

'Well you can't blame her, he doesn't look fun even though he is super-hot'

However, when the mutterings persisted Maan made himself known, getting up to walk out the large common room as most members sucked in shocked breaths and pretended to be doing everything other than gossiping about the quiet man who walked past them.

'Maan' Sasha called exiting the Virology lab and walking the brief hallway to meet at the staff room door which was shared by all the members of the Pathology, hence he had recognised most of the members gossiping about him, even if he didn't known their names.

'Sasha I really don't want to do this here' he intervened hearing the growing silence behind to which she nodded however stepped into his line of view when he tried to walk past her

'Please give me a chance to explain' she requested in earnestness looking tired and weak all of a sudden

'Fine' he hadn't wanted to give her so much space to hurt him some more however somethings needed clarifying, hence the next they found themselves at the hospital garden which was a rather big piece of greenery allowing both staff and its patience to gain some moments of peace.

'I hadn't planned on it, we ... it just happened. I really do like you Maan but...' She stopped as Maan jerkily got up from the bench they were seated at

'But what Sasha, if I'm not mistaken we've had this talk and once again you do the same. What is it that's changed?' he asked a little louder than intended as Sasha shrunk in her seat feeling ashamed but she needed to explain herself. Sasha and Maan had started working on the same day at the Hospital; being new, fresh graduates and in the same department; they had quickly formed a friendship; however over the years it grew into love or at least that's what Sasha thought until more recently, they were always perfectly harmonious and lively even when she moved from Haematology to virolgy. Sasha had been the first to propose, which Maan immediately refused not wanting any bitterness between a warm friendship but also being shy, he hated work affairs and the rumours that followed. The last thing he wanted was to be the talk of the department, he was already immune to the odd looks and the fancy names he was given but this was new; a friend asking him out. However after months of constant coaxing from Sasha; he had agreed. Although, it wasn't a year into their relationship when she first committed the first mistake in their relationship, he had then forgiven her assuming it to be alcohol related. After all the Christmas party ran early into the morning and he left early regardless of her moaning complaints. So when he went to work, the news of a highly drunk Sasha and the new lead Neil cosying up in the corner of a club was shocking but something they worked on and sorted out soon enough. If anything, Sasha was an extremely caring and honest individual, so for her to be caught again almost after 6 months of the last incident, was shocking but with same man, was another shock. If anything, Maan hated how professional and personal life were getting mixed now; something he was opposed to in the first place.

'I don't know Maan, the first time I promise it was only alcohol' she clarified with unshed tears, the last thing she wanted to do was harm Maan; a man she respected and cared for. After all they were friends for a long-time before dating for nearly 2 years.

'What about now Sasha?' he asked again in a calm voice, willing mentally to douse down the anger he left; not only on her but on himself too. For falling into something he detested.

'I ignored him, never walked in the same path as him initially after the Christmas party but then it became impossible being in the same team. Everyone was either talking or trying to make it sound normal, soon I don't even remember when, but we became friends. Calling in favours, covering each other backs on work front, and the repetitive official meetings made it impossible to stay away. I suppose I now realise the difference between a friends love and love love. I'll be honest, I think I was infatuated with you, but Neil isn't an infatuation' she looked up in remorse as he sighed holding onto his emotions with his hands

'Last week when you cancelled our date once again, I just broke; it felt like you and I were both still punishing me for the drunk Christmas. I wouldn't have done that had I been conscious, Maan. I swear. But then after that it looked like you looked for ways to stay away from me. I was tired of trying to run after you and away from Neil all at the same time. I suppose, I just broke when a mere football match became more important to you than us'

'You know that isn't the case Sasha but ok, what do you want now?' he questioned, feeling fatigued he tipped his head back and an image of Geet impaired his hearing, sending a million taps down his body immediately straightening him to his full form. Geet was the reason that day, but was she or he to blame after all Sasha herself admitted to be falling for Neil. Maan's sudden act scared Sasha who wrung into a circle, looking small compared to her 5.5 figure. Sasha was a gorgeous brunette: small buttoned eyes, round full lips and a tanned skin expressing her heritage; being a half-caste; she dispelled a mix of proud asserts from both her Causation father and Asian mother.

'I'm sorry, this time I just gave in. I think I love him Maan' she squeaked exhausted of fighting this battle between her heart and mind. Last time it was a mistake, but this time it was she that called and dined out willingly, even though it felt wrong however somewhere it gave internal piece too; so when date ended, she made up her mind that minute to break up with Maan. However she hadn't realised, some of the Pathology staff saw them together and had spread the news like fire, so before she could tell Maan, he was already aware and on leave; completely ignoring her attempts to be heard until today.

'What do you expect me to say Sasha? That I forgive you like the last time? That I should have paid more attention to my girlfriend amidst the busyness of life? Or even better, that my actions forced you to realise we weren't meant to be?' he was over with himself, the baggage of the sweet guy was wearing him down. Yes he was understanding and caring but that didn't mean people could walk over him. All of a sudden the weight seemed impossible to carry, forcing him to seat down. For it wasn't just Sasha and her current change in feelings, but there was Geet, her baby and her parents too who believed he was perfect partner to their daughter. Life wasn't what he expected it to be that minute, rather quite far from it.

'I'm so sorry' she cried bitterly, she knew she failed Maan; both as a friend and a lover

'I can't say I've forgiven you, because it's not that say this time Sasha. You know how I am, when I committed to you I had informed you of my priorities, even you know about last minute on-calls from the hospital. If I made you feel like I didn't care, then I apologise but you know that I have a lot going on with work and the UCL Haemostasis and Thrombosis study' he tried clarifying as Sasha bobbed her head in understanding again looking every bit guilty like she felt.

'I won't say you're forgiven but I can say it's for the better' he finished getting up on his wobbly legs and walking back towards the Pathology lab, leaving a still crying Sasha on the bench but there was a relieved smile playing on her lips. Maybe because she was now free to admit that she loved Neil.

Next: Pretence and maybe the sperm donation truth to Geet