Originally posted by: Ctrl-Alt-Del
Just wanna answer your this point.. yes, she herself brings it up every time she reiterates her baba-boycott.. but what I want to say is that emotions are a complicated thing.. you can talk about the same subject calmly one time but other time it can upset you.. perhaps when you talk about it then you talk from that angle that is bearable for you i.e. this person hurt me so I won't talk to him.. he doesn't deserve my attention.. with your anger you try to suppress the heartache that you felt.. but when someone else mention that incident again and ask you did you pushed him.. you think about it and then start living those moments again.. what I was feeling at that time.. if I pushed him.. yes, I pushed him.. what was I feeling when I pushed him.. and then you start feeling that heartache once again.. the thing is emotions are a very complicated thing.. when you are feeling some emotions that you can feel it, live it.. but making someone else understand what you felt and why you reacted in some hyper way is almost impossible..
In your other post you said that Lopa reacted that way because she had to hear and see it all again.. but Baba did not reiterate what he had said.. again its YOU who're thinking that when words are reiterated then one is justified to react but if words are not reiterated then its not.. what we see in others is a reflection of ourselves.. we think that how would I react in such situation so if the person is not reacting like me then there must be some prob.. but each person is an individual.. each person think differently. feel differently and thus react differently too.. it was said about Lopa too that she was doing drama in front of Salman.. but what's happening in someone's mind only that person know so I'll again say we are not capable of criticizing emotions of anyone..
Here I wanna say one more thing.. why Rohan did not reacted when baba said bad things about his father but lost his cool when Manveer called him Chamak Challo.. who knows as he looks not very manly guy so he has already faced such comment in his real life so he got real angry fearing that this tag may not stick to him.. but he's confident about his father so he didn't feel like reacting.. same is the case with Bani.. her mom is a single mother and is fighting with cancer from Bani's childhood.. she has spend her life in fear of losing her mother.. so it has become her weakness.. this topic is touchy for her so reaction is overreaction for many.. because those people won't react the Bani's way if it was said to them.. but they forget that their life is not like Bani's life too..
In the end I just wanna say that I'd like to make a long accusation post about some contestant on the basis that her foot was out of the shoe so she won the task by cheating.. or that she lied to Navin about Bani.. but I will never make a post that she was doing drama when she was crying.. when I don't know any person's sate of mind and emotional vulnerability then I've no right to make any such claim..
I can agree that emotions are complex, but I think it's both naive and unrealistic to expect that an incident that has happened on the show will never be referenced again. The fact remains that Bani did push Baba. It is another thing that I, as did many others, gave her a free pass for that reaction, even though I do not condone violence.
The question was definitely applicable therein, and I see no reason why it should not be asked, particularly when it is not in the context of the comment made on her mum. If it was - I'd call it insensitive too. She wasn't asked to go into her thought process as to why she pushed Baba, etc - the question was simply that she pushed him.
Tomorrow, Salman could reference it - a panelist could, in relation to the violence that has happened this season - I'm not going to find them insensitive either, and I don't see Bani flying off the handle - as she did today - should one of them ask it. Like I said - Manu brought up the issue, but not any more than Bani does herself - in that he did not question her reasons at all. And as such, I honestly don't identify with Bani reacting thus at the mere mention.
I am not talking about whether Lopa's reaction is justified or not - I merely said that it is not a comparable example. Had Lopa reacted like that upon someone asking her whether she also abused Jagga in return, I would agree to the comparison. But there is a major difference - here the context wasn't even on what Baba said to Bani - it was strictly limited to Bani's push. Yes some people thought Lopa's reaction was a drama - I found it genuine. But it all depends on how something comes across to you - as I'm certain you agree.
As for the notion that people watching cannot judge Bani's reactions because they're not in her situation - you don't know that. Many viewers may have it far worse than she does - and some may be in exactly the same boat, and still not identify with her reaction. It's not necessary that any two people in the same situation react exactly the same way. It's subjective. And most perspectives will be a combination of what one sees and thinks. It is why many, including myself, found Lopa's point during the Manveer-Gaurav captaincy task correct, but her crying over it OTT and unnecessary.
You limit yourself from commenting on contestants' reactions - but many viewers will not, and I see nothing wrong with that - each to their own. I can only speak for myself - because the issue is sensitive, I refrained from commenting on Bani's reaction when it happened. But I don't agree that such a reaction is warranted when the incident is merely referenced in a different context.
Edited by SP2684 - 8 years ago
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