Antara?
hmm..
i need to tell you something..
he got up and made her stand up as well.. he made her lean on couch and held her hands gently..
i did lots of practice for this.. but..
i hadn't planned it this way..
what..?
yeah! but if i don't say it now.. i don't know when i'll get another chance or same confidence..
you're making me scared.. what is it?
I love you Antara..
i know that.. we both love each other..
no! i mean.. he sighed and looked aside.. he took the box out of his pocket and gave it to her..
i mean that i'm in love with you.. like 'in' love with you.. romantically...!!
she looked at him in awe.. she couldn't believe what he just said.. and this was beyond her expectations..
when he saw her looking at him in confusion may be.. he held her shoulders firmly yet gently...
i know.. it's been a while that we are living like a couple.. you know what i mean..
he got worried as a tear drop fell down from her eye... but he knew if he couldn't say it right at this moment.. he would never be able to...
but i still think i had to confess this... he continued..
screw the reason why i asked you to marry me.. screw everything that made me believe that i can't fall in love again.. every damn thing that made me realize my feelings for you so late..
she kept looking at him with hazy eyes... her knees were melting after hearing whatever he said..
her heart was pounding loudly.. as if it could explode right here...
now, when i look back and think about the days and nights i spent with you i feel angry for wasting that time and not confessing this at the first day itself..
i love you miss call.. and I..
tho we are already married.. legally.. and we personally don't have any issues..
what am i saying..? he asked himself.. he brushed his fingers in his hair...and took a breath..
what i'm trying to say is..would you like to start it all over with me..
'course first you need to be sure.. whether you also love me or not.. because i don't want to push another burden on you.. and it's not necessary that you feel the same way.. till now you have been doing whatever i asked.. but...
her emotions took over her.. tears rolled down from her eyes and before he could say anything further.. she hugged him..
she buried her face in his broad chest and clutched his shirt from behind..
he looked at her with wide eyes..
what?
is that a yes?
wow! i thought you will throw tantrums..
he hugged her back and snuggled in her neck..
she broke down making his heart pound.. they both could feel each other's heartbeat..
Raghu caressed her hairs gently..
uuughhh!!! look at her..
i can't believe i just confessed to this rondhu puppy..
tell me.. is that a yes?
she didn't say anything and hugged him even more..
thousands of memories appeared in her mind... she waited for this moment for almost 8 years.. and now when he is saying it.. her mind is not able to believe that..
she didn't know if she was dreaming his fvt dream again.. and if she was.. then she didn't want to wake-up forever.. like always..
but she came out of her trance when he called her name..
Antara... what's with this reaction.. do you love me too.. ?
like already??
since when?? don't tell me since forever..
i knew it you can't escape from my charm.. he chuckled and tried to tease her like always..
and that's when reality hit her..
she can't just tell him that it's true.. she definitely can't.. what if he doubted her friendship..
she realized something and pulled herself out of his hug..
i...i.. she couldn't dare to look at him.. thinking of what if he thought wrong of her..
she rushed to her bedroom.. and locked herself in the bathroom..
Raghu ran after her calling her name.. he didn't understand what exactly happened to her..
she was happy.. then..?
right now, he was upset but he calmed himself down.. and knocked her door..
Antara what's wrong..?? he called her multiple time but all he could hear was her sobs..
Antara broke down realizing that in order to make him happy and not to feel dissatisfied with her.. she did that..
she sat on the floor of the bathroom leaning her back on the door...she hid her face in her palms and cried as she realized that they have been sleeping together for months..
what if she told him that she loved him all this time and he thought wrong of her..
what if he thought that i agreed to marry him.. or sleep with him because i wanted that.. and not him..
she couldn't believe that in order to save this marriage, this relationship, this friendship.. she lost her only chance to confess and make him believe that she loved him this whole time..
this is the first time in 8 years when he asked her if she loves him too or not..
and she can't lie..
she could hear his footsteps from outside.. and she cursed herself for making him suffer again.
she got up.. washed her face and came outside.. she almost bumped into him.. while he was going to bang on her door again..
what's wrong with you..?
she nodded in no..
he held her arm and made her turn to him..
Antu.. if you don't love me.. i won't mind.. and i am sorry for teasing you..
i'm sorry if my confession made you sad.. i didn't want that..
she nodded in no again.. but couldn't look into his eyes..
she opened her closet.. grabbed two suits for herself and kept them in a bag..
what are you doing..? he asked..
she packed her laptop.. which made him furious..
Antara... don't behave like kids..
i thought you would be glad to know that i have feelings for you...
and i thought you had too..
please..don't think otherwise.. i told you na.. i have to go to my colleague's place..
she called in the afternoon.. i just... she couldn't complete her sentence..
he pulled her and made her look into his eyes..
she tried but her eyes turned moist..
i confessed because we have been living like a couple for months but it was always hard for you..
and you only told me that you can't make love with a husband who doesn't love you...
tears rolled down from her eyes but she immediately wiped them away...
i wanted to tell you that even if i misbehaved with you.. or i had fights with you.. being with you never felt wrong..
and when you told me that.. i tried.. but i couldn't keep myself from touching you..
because i loved every bit of it.. and lately, i realized that it was because i have been in love with you this whole time..
and i wanted you to feel the same.. that's why i told you my feelings..
so that you don't feel disgust... or burdened anymore.
she felt if he was laughing at her.. because he was right..even though she was in love with him..even though she liked to be in his arms.. she did feel disgusted thinking as if she was betraying him..
aap kya kya bol rahe ho.. mujhe kuchh nahi hua hai... i'm fine.. in fact i'm very happy. she tried to speak with confidence...
i'm not leaving this house.. i told you about this in the morning also...Raghu rubbed his temple in irritation..
she picked her bag and came outside..
sorry.. aaj aapko thoda dhyaan rakhna padega.. i wouldn't have gone if it wasn't urgent..
she smiled trying to hide her tears and shivering lips..
Raghu held her hand and stopped her..
do you know this is the stupidest thing you have ever done..
haha.. she tried to laugh meekly.. he looked into her eyes making her knees melt..
she bit her lips trying to control her emotions.. but her tears rolled down on her cheeks..
a lone tear escaped from Raghu's eyes..
why are you doing this..
she nodded in no..
what about me..? she looked at him...
you don't care about me.. right??
she nodded in no...
i never asked you for anything.. but please.. just for today..
Raghu nodded in no..
i need some time.. trust me.. i can't stay here tonight..
i can't explain you.. but please let me go...
you can't do this to me..
please.. she took her bag and almost ran from there in tears...
Raghu knew that something was definitely wrong this time.. she never thought of leaving like this.. not even when they had fights.. he came outside and saw her leaving in an auto-rikshaw..
Raghu came inside and threw the flower pot down.. he blew off all the candles and threw the cake in dustbin..
he was always angry whenever she behaved weird but this time it was too much for him to handle..
he sat down on couch and rubbed his temple in frustration..
is everything really a burden for her.. then why the hell she agreed to be with me..
did she really like someone...?? in college.. or job may be...
he gritted his teeth and dig his nails in his palms thinking about the guy who broke her heart upto this extent that she can't even trust his love now..
he got up in anger.. he wasn't his senses and wanted to find anything about her odd behavior..
he checked her office and college mailing address but couldn't find anything..
almost an hour passed.. he received a text message "i have reached.. don't worry".. and he threw away his phone in anger.. he knew that she was pretending to be okay..
she expects me to believe this after everything that happened..
he checked her desk, external storages.. every single file- old and new... but he couldn't find anything..
he knew he was just wasting his time.. and he won't find anything here.. why would she keep any picture or anything in here.. still he kept flipping pages in anger and kept cursing the person who made her cry so much that she closed herself in a shell...
it was 10pm.. he couldn't believe he was looking for something for 4 hours now..for anything...
he checked her closet.. threw all her clothes and belongings on bed.. opened her locker but sighed in disappointment..
he thought of something and looked for his phone.. though it was broken but he fixed it immediately and called Sid.. he didn't want to.. but he got no other option..
Sid picked up the call just before Raghu was about to hang up..
Raghu.. is everything okay? you're calling so late..
Sid, tell me what is wrong with Antara..
what?
Raghu closed his eyes.. and asked him again while pissing his teeth..
Antara, what's wrong with her..?
what did you do..?
Raghu sat on the bed and rubbed his temple..
nothing.. today, i confessed to her..
and she escaped from you..
how..?
oh god! Sid sighed in disbelief..
look Raghu.. she will talk to you.. once she will be okay.. give her some time..
she is probably overwhelmed with everything that would have happened..
you think i'm a fool..
ain't you?
what?
nothing..
just tell me damn it.. i know there is something you both are hiding from me.. and you knew it all the time..
look man.. i get it.. you called me because you trust me.. but if Antara didn't say anything.. then neither can i.. i can't break her trust..
and it is important than what's going on right now..
okay.. she doesn't want you to doubt her friendship.. that's it..
are you both sick??? how the hell it affects our friendship..
we got married but we were still friends.. and now if we are in love doesn't change the fact that we are old friends..
but she thinks that..
why? he asked in anger.
because she loved you...
Raghu was stunned after hearing what Sid just said..
Sid, i'm in no mood of jokes..
you think.. i am?
i cherish Antara and her friendship more than anyone.. there is no way i would speak anything about her without thinking twice..
i didn't want to say this Raghu.. but you indeed are the dumbest person I have come across to..
yes! she loved you.. and she loved you all this time...
but she kept her feelings aside and chose your friendship.. she never confessed because she didn't want you to misunderstand her.. she didn't want you to doubt her that everything she did for you was because she loved you.. or she wanted to be with you.. but she indeed did everything for you because she cherished your friendship more than anything..
Raghu was dumbstruck after listening to everything Sid said and he asked him one plain question..
how do you know...? and since when..?
final year.. i by chance read her diary...and when i asked her.. she told me the truth..
but she never shared anything with me by herself..
which diary..?
she used to write one in college.. i don't know if she still has that with her..
hmmm..
tell me something Sid.. was i really a fool for you?
to be honest.. Anatra is.. but i don't blame her..
why didn't you tell me about this before...a lone tear dropped from Raghu's eye..
i'm glad you realized it by yourself.. and rather than forcing yourself in this relation..
though lots of things must be going on in her head right now.. but i'm sure.. she must be very happy after listening to you... you gave her best birthday gift Raghu...
talk to her.. because you know it very well that she won't talk by herself...
Raghu nodded and hmmmed... they both said goodbye and hang up the call..
Sid sighed on another side... while Raghu looked at his bleeding hand that he just punched hard on mirror...
he wanted to trust what Sid said.. but he himself needed to confirm it...because if it was true he won't be able to forgive himself.
'i read her diary...' Sid's words echoed in his mind..
'i don't know if she still has that...'...
he recalled when he saw her writing it once or twice...
but it's been a while he saw that.. not after their anniversary.. he thought...
where would she keep it.. somewhere, she knows i would never see or touch it..
her office..? he nodded in no..
he thought of something and threw all stuffs from bed down.. he opened the bed storage and pulled her suitcase out..
it had her wedding lehenga, gifts she got her from in-laws during karwa chauth... he took one cover out from the case.. and his heartbeat raised.. it was there.. it really looked like an 7-8 years old diary..
he picked the diary and kept her dress back in the suitcase..
he opened the cover with a heavy heart and one picture from their college farewell fell down..
he felt sharp pain in his heart as he looked at the pic... he was laughing madly in that pic.. while she was looking at him...
he recalled that he never got to see this pic before.. she perhaps hid it..
he flipped the first page of diary...and her eyes got widened..
'today, i saw him.. for the first time.. he was sitting in the last row.. wearing a white shirt and black jeans..'
Raghu sat on the bed with a thud... and a lone tear escaped from his eye...
Kyunki Saas Bhi Kabhi Bahu Thi 2
Geet - Hui Sabse Parayee
