FF: Love, Cherish me ~~ Epilogue ~~ - Page 47

Note: Mature content ahead. Not appropriate for minors. Please read with discretion.

Darkness

Some day...

Preity and Ashwin's bedroom:

"No... I can't anymore...I can't see her like this, Ashu baby." Preity shook her head sobbing her heart out in Ashwin's arm. " It's like she is a living corpse, just a shell...she doesn't have any life left in her. She is dead and we all have killed her." She sobbed harder. "We are all her culprits."

Ashwin gently pat her back in understanding. What could he honestly say to console his wife when he felt the exact same. They all are Thapki's culprits.

"Yesterday I saw Thapki, she was standing by the hall when Bihaan devarji came to visit Ma. He didn't even glanced at her...but she was just standing there like a statue, looking at him. Her face...if you could only see her face... " Preity broke into tears again "I wanted to die on spot. Ashu baby, can you ever imagine us being in their position? She is in so much pain"

"Bihaan is not faring better, Preity. He has completely changed. Looking at him now, you can never relate him to the fun loving-jovial-naughty Bihaan who always had a smile in his face. It is like he is living just for the sake of it. All he does now is work and...drink...and he is getting worse..."

"Have you tried talking to him? He looks so thin...where does he eat?"

"Haven't you seen how Bihaan ignores us?? He will talk to us about business but the moment we try to talk him about anything else he just clams shut and leaves..." Ashwin sighed.

"Ashu baby, I don't know anything just get them back together. I beg you. Matarani will never forgive us if we let it continue like this." Priety wept and Ashwin despaired.

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Few days later...

"Ballu where did you go so suddenly? It is so late at night"

Balwinder was looking preoccupied, and he started when he saw his mother waiting for him in the living room.

"Ma, why haven't you slept yet?"

"When you left like that, I got worried, what happened?...waise bhi I couldn't sleep...I went to see Thapki betiya when she didn't come down for dinner...and---." She just left it like that.

Balwinder shook his head dejectedly. "Raghu called me Ma, Bihaan is in jail."

Dadima flinched. "What happened? What did he do?"

"He trashed a bar and beat its bar tender when he refused to sell him liquor. The bartender had to be admitted to the hospital...Bihaan destroyed the whole bar. Police was called and had to intervene to bring the situation under control"

Dadima sighed sadly, "Have you talked to him? Did you get him out?"

"I couldn't get him out so late at night. I have posted bail but he can get out tomorrow soonest."

"And what did he have to say for himself?"

"Nothing, Bihaan was so wasted there was no point talking to him. He was lying on the prison cell floor when I went... probably sleeping off his liquor. He probably has no idea where he is right now."

After a pause he continued, "Raghu told me, Bihaan is getting out of control Ma. Nowadays he is like a bull being waved a red flag all the time. He starts fighting at the smallest possible provocation. He never was so cruel like he is now...currently he seems to lose all sense of sanity while beating people up. Raghu was saying, all the other guys are now scared to be with him, work with him."

"You should talk to him Ballu...just talk to him..."

"TALK?? Ma thats what I have been trying to since before that dratted divorce...but Bihaan just doesn't talk...he talks business and just that...I tried believe me Ma, I tried talking to him he just clams up. And he refused to come home and live here." Balwinder said in despair.

"WELL TRY HARDER! We have let one mistake happen by not stopping the divorce...we can't let him waste his life away...one life is wasting away upstairs right now"

"I tried to stop the divorce Ma, you know that... but he didn't listen...and Thapki betiya too didn't listen to me, she just signed and everything happened before I could do anything" Balwinder said in a small voice.

"If it continues like this...soon we will have two dead bodies to save one...they are already living corpses."

"What happened to Thapki betiya, why didn't she come down to dinner today?"Balwinder tried to change the topic...he did not want to talk about the desolate state of Bihaan anymore.

"She was too sick to come down... she has been having dizzying spells recently...and why won't she? She stopped eating long time back...she is too weak. I tried to feed her Ballu, but she couldn't even keep the food inside her...she vomited everything out...she is dying...I can feel it. How can a human live without its heart?" Dadima sobbed.

Balwinder put his arm around his mother, "Ma, I don't know what I should do, I feel responsible for everything...I feel so wretched and helpless all the time. I am trying my best...believe me. I thought she might fare better once she goes to her maayka..."

"What did Krishnakanthji say?"

"She refused to leave with him...he tried everything to convince her but she didn't budge. She just won't leave with him. She said, it is her sasural and her husband's house...she won't leave it. She will only live here."

Both mother and son became silent after that. Pandey Nivas has become a Paatal Lok...it was like as if a dark cloud now resided above it...keeping it in darkness all the time...there was no laughter...no happiness...no contentment. All gone.

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Few days later...

Bihaan jerked into consciousness with a start. He wiped the sweat from his forehead. When did he fall asleep?? He knew this would happen if he fell asleep. This always happened... that was why he preferred to drink to oblivion where there was only peaceful darkness...darkness was good... he didn't have to worry about dreaming in that pitch darkness.

He always had the same dream though...he dreamt of a happy Thapki, a mischievous, playful Thapki full of life, who was always smiling...but it was not him she smiled at...it was Dhruv she always smiled at...it was Dhruv she held in her arms...it was always him she kissed...And Bihaan saw it all in vivid details in his dream...

Bihaan wanted her to be happy...so he should be happy about the dream...but it was more than a nightmare for him...and today it was worse...he saw Dhruv tucking Thapki's hair behind her ear...she was lying replete in his arms...naked ...and Dhruv was about to lower his mouth to her breasts...

Bihaan vomited on the floor by the side of his bed remembering it...nothing came out but water offcourse...he hadn't had a decent meal but liquor past 24 hours...he shuddered wiping his mouth...the images seemed to be etched in his eyes...he can't remove them from his mind.

Why wasn't she standing in the balcony when he went to visit Ma today? She was always there silently watching him from afar...he never acknowledged her presence or talked to her but that didn't mean he did not know she was there. He never turned his head towards her...but he looked at her through the mirror of his bike and she was always there on the balcony watching him leave.

Except today... Why wasn't she there?? Did she forget him already?? Only in 26 days 13 hours 28 minutes?? Was he that easy to forget?? Bihaan felt like someone had plunged a stake into his heart...not even a second pass by when she didn't cross through his mind...Did she really forget him? Damn it!! Why wasn't she there today?

Bihaan put on his jacket. He would just go and see for himself.

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3:13 am, same night...

Bihaan didn't plan to talk to her or anything. He would just see her from a distance and leave he promised to himself. He silently climbed up her window...she was not in her room...was she staying with Dadima? She must be there...he started to tiptoe into Dadima's room. Bihaan opened the door of her room as silently as possible and peeped. No, Thapki was not sleeping with Dadima. Where the hell was she then? Did she leave Pandey Nivas...surely someone would have told him because that's all everyone tried to do, discuss Thapki with him.

Could she be in his room? Not likely but he decided to check just in case... After that he would go to Thapki's father's house...she had to be there...and he would only steal a glance of her...was that too much to ask??

Damn it!! No.. she wasn't in his room as well...he turned to leave for her father's house...when a sliver of white dupatta caught his attention. He moved close...and found her. She was curled into a ball in the rounded bamboo swing in his room and was sleeping there. She was holding something in her hands close to her heart...he moved closer...it was ...his jacket...

Bihaan crumbled into his knees by the swing seeing this sight. She had been crying before she fell asleep, he couldn't help but traced the dry salty lines of her tears with his fingers...how could such a beautiful soul like her love someone like him so much?Was that his luck or misfortune?

Thapki jerked into consciousness at his touch. She looked at him...blinked her eyes at him like an owl... trying to figure out whether she was still dreaming or not...She extended her hand slowly to his face to check whether he would disappear into thin air...like he always does...

He didn't disappear this time "B-Bihaan?" she murmured with wonder in her voice.

Bihaan lost it...whatever sanity he had in him left at her sweet voice. He yanked her into his arms and kissed her...devoured her...consumed her...finally he dragged in Thapki's scent into his nostrils to his lungs in a deep breath...he felt alive again...after almost one month later he had his oxygen...can human being survive without oxygen for so long? How did he survive?

He mauled her lips, there could not be a gentler description. And Thapki let him...in fact she was participating enthusiastically...she wound her legs tightly around Bihaan's waist and gripped his hair by his nape.

He laid her in the floor though the bed was so near...he didn't have time for that...he needed to have her right now...right then...there was not a single second to spare. He began to tear her clothes out...he didn't stop till she was naked like the day she was born.

And then he looked...he stared at the expanse of creamy white skin all over her...her absolute loveliness...not a single blemish to mar her perfect beauty... but this would not do his territorial vibes were screaming like a wild beast...he needed to put his mark on her...where Dhruv was about to put his mouth on...he needed to mark her breasts...he needed to demonstrate to the world whom she belonged to, which was him... she belonged to ONLY HIM.

At that moment Bihaan was not a human...he was like the animal his mother accused him... only one thought was going through his mind, MINE...MINE to possess...MINE to claim...

And Thapki let him...because she was his to possess and his to claim...she was utterly and mindlessly HIS.

When sanity returned after some hours later, Bihaan wanted to die in shame...What had he done??

They were still lying on the floor. Thapki had probably passed out from excess of passion... she was curled into a ball her hand thrown over his chest; her head nestled in his arm. He had been rough with her, he had taken her like a beast without any compassion and consideration...Bihaan cringed and winced in aghast.

He hadn't muttered a word to Thapki since he came in...no words of care, no wooing...he just jumped on her...He felt so ashamed...It didn't matter she seemed to be liking and...even encouraging him. Bihaan shook his head...no matter what...no girl deserved to be treated thus...to be taken in such brutal manner that too again and again. The fact that she was an eager participant didn't justify his disgusting behaviour. She deserved better than to be treated like he treated her, deserved better than him...deserved someone like ...Dhruv??UGHHH

He looked at her again, she was breathing softly, sleeping an innocent's sleep... He gently extracted his arm from under her head and picked her up on his both hands. She weighed lighter that a feather...how much weight did she lose??? He thought incredulously. He laid her gently on the bed and covered her in the blanket...she murmured something and went back to her sleep.

How the hell did this happen he asked himself again...he came here tonight only to look...to check on Thapki, not to ----, he groaned and started to pull on his clothes, berating himself. He just complicated the whole situation by making love to her... He couldn't let her think they would be getting back together...there was no future for them...they needed to forget each other...and sooner the better.

This, today changed nothing, meant nothing, he kept saying to himself. as if saying it enough times would make it true. He should leave.

At a rustling sound he turned back. Thapki was sitting on the bed looking at him with her beautiful eyes...he could see her love for him pouring out of her gaze. Bihaan made to move towards her but stopped. No, Bihaan shouldn't encourage her.

"Bihaan?" she extended her left arm towards him.

Ignoring that, Bihaan turned to leave.

"Bihaan, wait I have to tell you something..."

Bihaan didn't want to know what she wanted to say...he needed to leave before he lost his control and attack her again...or maybe steal her away with him.

Without giving her chance to say anything or saying anything himself...he left.

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Chapter 20 - Void

ps. song for this update:

[YOUTUBE]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v6O4ARULEX4[/YOUTUBE]