Chapter 11
He caressed her hair and asked " what do you mean?"
"I said what I meant...I really don't know..." sighed Sanyukta... "Love is a strong word...once you utter it, there is no turning back...I like Rehan...but to say I love him...will be wrong...at least now...you know I had a huge crush on him , since ages..when he asked me out, I was giddy with joy, and when he asked me to be his girlfriend, I was so certain that I was in a dream...for a moment I felt that today whatever I will wish for I will get it...I said yes to him for I was so certain that I loved him...for I felt all those things that I had read in novels since ages, that fluttering of heart, that emptiness in your stomach, that increase in heartbeat...everything...but then I realised something..." she paused, and looked up at Randhir...
"What?" Randhir said looking at her...
"That...I had felt like that when I had a crush on my chemistry teacher in school too...that does not mean I loved him...I realised this is not love, may be a strong liking...so now for Rehan, what I feel is a very strong liking...may be I will fall in love later on..." Sanyukta smiled saying this...
"Sanyukta...can you do something for me?" Randhir asked , after they remained sitting silently for sometime...
"What, Randhir?..." Sanyukta asked
"Never change...come what may...please never change...be the way you are...always.." Randhir said feeling a lump in his throat..
"what came suddenly over you? Such a weird statement" Sanyukta asked him looking surprised
"Just, promise me..." Randhir said, sighing
"ok...fine...I promise..happy now?" Sanyukta said, and squeezed Randhir's hand...
They did not know when , but as they passed the night doing small talk, none wanting to leave the other and go--sleep found them, and they fell asleep, resting their head on each other shoulders, their arms still around each other...
The first rays of sunlight hit Randhir's face first, and woke him up...he felt disoriented for a moment, trying to recollect where he was, owing to the unfamiliar surrounding...then his eyes fell on Sanyukta, who was still sleeping peacefully, her head on his lap"sometime in the night, she must have shifted her position...he smiled looking at her cute face...very tenderly, and carefully he tried to remove those dark locks of hair, that fascinated him, and is now covering her face...Sanyukta stirred in her sleep, and Randhir hurriedly removed his hand...
Sanyukta rubbed her eyes, and looked up at him, smiling..." Good morning.." she said and got up..
"Yes, good morning, I think we should head to our respective rooms now...have you any idea we spent the entire night on the terrace of our college...its madness.." Randhir chuckled..
"I liked this madness' though..." Sanyukta said smiling..
"Me too"..he replied back , smiling..
The events of the last day kept replaying inside Sanyukta's head as she tried to concentrate in her studies. She shut her book feeling exasperated as her head buzzed with the memories of the last night on terrace. It was weird, very weird how she kept thinking about Randhir, his words, their words. She needed to discuss it with Kaustuki and Vidushi, she decided, but again she feared what they may tell her, they did not like Randhir, may be they will make her break her friendship with him. Just to think that she can never speak to Randhir again, made her feel depressed, she felt a weird ache in her heart imagining it. She decided that for the time being she will continue these escapades with Randhir secretly and keep Vidushi and Kaustuki in the dark. She felt excited at the prospect of these secret meetings.
Randhir went to the library to prepare for the exams...he had been neglecting his studies for quite sometime, for his mind was preoccupied first with the demons from his past and then that lingering fear of the outcome of the bet, of losing Sanyukta forever...he opened his books and tried to concentrate in his studies...he looked up when he heard the scraping sound of a chair in the empty library.. he was surprised when he saw Shanaya sitting at a table across him, buried in a book...it surprised him that she has not gone visiting her parents when almost the whole college has taken this chance to visit their home...Randhir sighed as he remembered how rude he was to her when they had their last meeting...he felt guilty..it was weird how he never before he had felt guilty for hurting someone but now he feels so compassionate towards everyone he hurts...Sanyukta's influence has certainly changed him in ways even he cannot fathom...he knew Shanaya deserved a proper apology from him...He got up and went to Shanaya's table...he saw Shanaya did not even notice his presence as he stood in front of her for quite some time, feeling lost as to what to say...
"Hey, Shanaya...umm...can I sit here?" Randhir said finally
Shanaya looked up at him, with a almost shocked expression, " Yeah, sure, you can...but you ..here??" she said
"Umm...yeahh... did not go home...you know I don't like to go home much...err..so how are you..seems like you too skipped going home..." Randhir said awkwardly
"Yep, actually my grandmother is not keeping well so my parents went to her place..and so I decided to stay put here...anyway exams are almost round the corner..." Shanaya replied
"Shanaya, I needed to say something to you.." Randhir blurted out, as he felt that he had beaten about the bushes enough...
"Yes, what?" Shanaya asked
"I...I am...Sorry..." Randhir almost whispered...
"Sorry? ...for what?" Shanaya asked , looking at him surprised...
"Well I hurt you so bad on Valentine's day...you deserve a proper apology ..." Randhir said looking at her guiltily
"Hey, no need to be sorry...you said what you felt...may be it was right ...may be if you had not been so harsh that day, I would have still tagged behind you...blindly following you, knowing that you don't love me, leaving my self-respect behind...like I always did...you know what?...you did me a huge favour when you broke up with me that day...I got a new confidence, I understood that I am worth much more alone, than I was when I was playing your personal entertainer..." Shanaya said smiling at him
"Please don't say that you were my "personal entertainer", I know I hurt you bad...but I used to be so annoyed , angry and upset always...half the time I did not even know when I uttered those hateful words..." Randhir said looking almost ashamed
"Randhir...I don't know what changed you? Or rather who changed you...but just seeing, that, now you can understand that you were wrong and that you are not afraid of accepting it, makes me happy...I am glad that this change has come into you...I always knew you were a nice person..and today I got to see that...and I accept your apology ...stay happy always" Shanaya said
Randhir smiled at her and said " I hope you find that perfect boyfriend that you always searched in me..."
Shanaya giggled a little and said " I know you will make a perfect boyfriend, but just not for me.."
Oddly enough Randhir felt a huge load relived from his chest as he saw Shanaya smiling at him , and forgiving him...feeling happy he went back to study, while Shanaya left the library...
Its said that once you get addicted to something, your cravings increases to get the thing of your addiction, Randhir and Sanyukta both suffered from a very different kind of addiction. They yearned for each other, the past few hours had definitely brought the two closer to each other , though they preferred to remain in denial. One scared to accept her confused feelings, torn between two people, and the other scared to admit that he really does feel for someone, that he has fallen in love with someone.
Unable to stay away from each other Sanyukta and Randhir again planned to meet at the terrace in the night. They knew probably it will be the last night on terrace together for sometime, as their friends will come back the next day and then it will be more difficult to meet each other on the sly, not to mention Randhir had this other pressing problem of Rehan returning and trying to snatch Sanyukta away from him. All Sanyukta and Randhir wanted was to spend this night together in each other's company.
They sat beside each other and talked into the night, least bothered about what might the next morning bring for them. Sanyukta almost forgot there is a Rehan in her life till her mobile began to ring incessantly...she looked at her phone, startled , as she saw Rehan's name flashing on the screen. Stealing a glance at Randhir, she hesitated to pick up the phone. Randhir noticed her hesitation, and to ease her mind, he gestured her to pick up the call...
Sanyukta took the call and said " Hello.."
"Hi...gone to sleep?" Rehan said from the other end..
"N..no...not really...will do in a few moment" Sanyukta stammered feeling nervous
"Its so late and you are still up? Studying I guess?" Rehan said sounding concerned
"Y..yes ..studying" replied Sanyukta feeling guilty for lying
"I was missing you" said Rehan suddenly sounding serious.. "A lot" he added after a pause...
"sorry for calling so late...could not help it..." Rehan said apologetically
"Its alright..." Sanyukta said, laughing lightly...
As Sanyukta continued to speak to Rehan, there sat a burning soul beside her...Randhir could not help feeling jealous as he heard Sanyukta speaking to Rehan. He tried to ignore that same dull ache that crept into his heart, but yet he could not...he tried to remind himself, that its still a bet...but in his heart he knew, that the bet was long forgotten and all that remained was a feeling of undying love and passion for Sanyukta...
It was only when Sanyukta tapped lightly on his shoulder that his trance broke..."Randhir, I have been calling you for so long...what happened?..are you all right?" Sanyukta asked looking concerned..
"Y..yes ...I am...just feeling tired...I think I will go to sleep now.." Randhir said quickly...he got up abruptly and started towards the door...
"Hey, wait up..." cried Sanyukta, running after him, and grabbing his hand to stop him..
"Why the hell are you running...we can walk together you know..." Sanyukta said
Randhir sighed and looked at Sanyukta, saying .." Sanyukta...I have been thinking...its better we don't meet anymore...this friendship thing is just not working...for me...at least...then there is Rehan ...even if you are not sure how you feel about him yet, but you cannot just deny, that you are in a relationship with him..he won't like it if we continue with this friendship...you know Rehan and me don't exactly share a great bonding"
"Here you are saying you and Rehan don't share a great bonding, yet you are ready to sacrifice our friendship for him...weird..." Sanyukta said softly, shaking her head
"No...I am not sacrificing our friendship for Rehan...I am doing this for you...because I don't want to see you getting hurt..." Randhir replied quietly, and walked off, leaving a very confused Sanyukta behind..
***
PS: Next chapter will be up soon...a lot has happened in the actual show meanwhile...cvs have brought to life Shanaya on screen 😆...there will be someone for Shanaya in the end...but err dont expect Aryan to come...😆
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