#2 SS Memories|| Thread 3 Link on page 1 (19 June) - Page 77

Originally posted by: orchids8888

Dear Happy 2016 to you & your family...🥳

Originally posted by: VioletFlower

Res for updates 14 and 15

___________________________

Happy New Year Cheeni di !! 🤗😊

Ahh... finally I'm here... I've just caught up with the last two updates ... so I made a joint post for parts 14 and 15.

Part 14:

It's so pitiful to see Khushi so broken... All the memories caused pain and hate against her father and brother earlier... Now it will slowly start pointing to her mother... I hope she doesn't blame herself for not understanding earlier... I don't think it was her fault coz everyone else hid everything from her for different reasons.

As always... I love the Arnav Khushi parts ❤️ ❤️

Uh oh... just as soon as I wished Khushi to not fall into the guilt trip... she has started to blame herself for no mistake on her part. 😔

Tara Banerjee affected Arnav's life to such a huge extent? 😕 Doesn't sound good to me. But if that is gonna motivate Arnav to bring Khushi out of this bad phase... I don't think I mind. 😉😉😛

The poem was awesome !! Loved it too !! 👏

Part 15:

God !!! You are out to make me cry, aren't you??? With Khushi's memories... Though I don't exactly visualize myself as the protagonist in every story, I often think from the perspective of the person whose perspective is narrated in the story. And I end up here with a choked up throat when I think of Khushi's unpublished book. 😭 😒 😒

Arnav tricks her into going out !?! Clever guy ! 😃

Khushi being so paranoid while walking on the road broke my heart...💔

Arnav and Anjali fighting over Filmfare Awards ? I wouldn't have even dreamt of such an idea !! 🤣 Hope their efforts bear fruit soon !!

Khushi wants to go back home? 😲😲 Uh oh... but why? Waiting to see what was bothering Khushi in the next update !!

Originally posted by: RSanaya71

Hope Khushi stays ,

Like the way Arnav wasn't judgmental.


Happy New Year dear😊

Originally posted by: breezyvm

Awesome waiting for next

Originally posted by: psywak

very well written...awesome

Originally posted by: anu1017

First of all so sorry for the late comment, I have no excuse than Saying AD. Coming to the updates loved them both as usual!!

Ahhh poor Khushi her guilt is eating her but she has to realize that she acted with the knowledge she had at the the time. Arnav and Anji ar such good friends to have at the lowest point that she is at now, I just wish Akash would talk to her now and ease her pain.

Hmm why does she want to go to Charlotte now? Cannot wait to see where you will take the story!!!!

Originally posted by: sk2405

Aane mein der ho gayi par now I am here!

Akash's worst fears did come true, for Khushi did take on the news of her mother's betrayal very gravely. The worst is she extended all the unwarranted blame upon herself so much that her guilt laden self refuses to see the light of rationality. Her dilemma is totally valid because in circumstances as such, it is very difficult to hold a single person responsible for the downfall of the complete family. The issue with them actually was that they were all very weak and incapable of forgiving the other. Had even one of them forgiven the other, their family wouldn't have been so shattered as it is now.

I am glad to see Arnav help her out. It was emotional to see him face the demons from his past while help her cope up with her past. And looking at Khushi, it definitely does seem that she is faring much better.

I am surprised at her sudden decision of going to Charlotte but then I do have a deeling that she will not.

Waiting for the next part.

Update soon. 😊

Originally posted by: ..Chashmish..

res -- ;)

Unres--

So, what do i say? Khushi's pain is so raw and relate- able. Hats of to you for showing the emotions so aptly. It touches us straight to our heart.😊

I just love your Memories Cheeni! Sacchi!!😳

Banner by Sadh123

Before proceeding to chapter I would like to give small explanation about Academic Probation. In USA's education system, there is a particular GPA and you have to score above it. For example for undergrads the number is 2.0 (out of 4.0), so if your cumulative GPA is below 2.0, most of the colleges disqualify you. (We have same system in India and our number is 6.0 but I am not sure if each college follows that or not that is why I gave a little summary here)

ChapterSixteen: Infinity

"I want to go to Charlotte", Khushi Gupta said, making Arnav stare at her for few seconds. After processing her words carefully he spoke, maintaining his calm demeanor, "Okay, you want to visit your home town. And if I may ask, why? Just curious". He waited for her to speak up.

"Well", she fidgeted her palms nervously, "it is not a visit", she said. Her explanation, baffled him little more.

"I don't get it", he asked. He had gotten a hint, his heartbeat had suddenly increased, he almost knew what she was going to say; he had realized that she was insinuating, leaving New York for forever, still he waited for her reply before making any decision.

"I don't want to work here anymore", she said and there was a silence as thick as fog. Arnav was not speaking as he was did not know what to say while Khushi had nothing to say anymore.

Arnav got up from his chair, shutting the lid of laptop and giving full attention to Khushi. He scratched his head and said, "did...didn't we go through this few days ago? Stop punishing yourself and accept that there is nothing you could have done to save your family."

"And you think that one conversation can make it all go away?!" Khushi folded her hands and shook her head in shock.

"No. I never thought that. Hundreds of, thousands of conversations later, you will find yourself cursing and punishing you." Arnav replied as he took a step toward her.

She could not meet his eyes, something stopped her. One glance at his orbs and she would drop the plan of leaving New York, forever. "So, you know nothing can heal this.", she replied.

"I said, even thousand conversations cannot, I never said nothing", Arnav said taking another step to reach her.

"This is my problem Arnav, let me solve it alone! Every time I get up from the bed, I feel like wow! May be today I would feel better abut myself. And the moment Sun goes down, my every hope goes away with it, vanishes", she clicked her fingers, "just like that!" She took a brief pause, making a promise to herself that she would not cry, not in front of this man, who would wipe her tears and make her forget everything for few seconds. "The day we talked...I felt better but I just know I cannot take care of your sister anymore, I am not capable enough! I cannot stay here, I need to be left alone", she was helpless. "I do not even know how long is it going to take?! May be...may be infinity!" She felt a tear betraying her and rolling down her cheek.

Arnav studied her; ages before he had decided that he hated seeing her in pain then how could he just let her slip in abyss. He reached her in a stride and said, "infinity, right? The worst case is infinity. And I will be there with you, till", he wet his bottom lips, "running tongue over it, infinity. If that is what you want, if that would make you stay here, I promise that I will be here with you! Pulling you away from going into depression, episodes of self doubt", he cupped her cheeks, "yeah I will be! "

Khushi opened her mouth to speak but could not find the words to describe her feeling, "this...this is going to get worse."

He chuckled, "no one knows that better than me. And no one knows better than me, that running away would not lead you anywhere but to endless dark pit. Guilt eats you! Betrayal makes you helpless and running way, hiding somewhere look so easy but it is not, Khushi."

Khushi looked into his eyes, how is that possible? How could he put her anxiety, her thoughts, into few words, so easily, like he has been going through something since years?! She wondered.

After few seconds she moved away, pulled herself together. "I appreciate your words, Mr. Raizada but I need you to book an one-way ticket to Charlotte because even my laptop seems to leave me."

"I will not!" Arnav made his decision clear.

"Then I am afraid I will have to talk to someone who can see and understand things better than you Arnav", she left him alone as she walked out through the door. He knew her next step, he knew it was Anjali. He sat on chair, thinking about the days, he had been insisting on running away. A distant yet so fresh memory came rushing.

"Hey Buddy, how was your test?" Aman came back to the apartment and saw Arnav typing on is computer.

"Okay", he replied curtly. Aman was annoying and Arnav had not forgotten the fact despite of their pleasant morning jog.

"Aren't you going to ask about my test?" Aman chuckled.

"No"

"That was rude", Aman laughed, he opened mini-fridge and looked for soda. "Where did our coke go?"

"Aman", Arnav got up from his chair and faced Aman, "we need to talk".

"Go on", Aman replied finally finding Dr. Pepper.

"You need to find another roommate for spring", Arnav said and went back to work.

"You hate me, I get it. But I am the best you could get Arnav", Aman joked as he sipped from the can.

"I won't be here for next semester" Arnav informed without giving away anything else.

"You...you are taking absence?" Aman asked.

"I am moving to Los Angeles. I am taking transfer to UCLA", Arnav said still looking into his laptop. Aman did not say anything, he quietly left Arnav in peace only to comeback with a piece of paper.

"This", Aman handed him that paper. Arnav who wasn't in a mood of Aman's lecture, did not see it. "Have a look, last time." Aman pacified him and Arnav gave in. He studied to paper for few minutes, the heading of the letter was enough for him to understand what was going on. "You are on academic probation", Arnav whispered.

"Do not use the euphemism Arnav, I will tell you what exactly does this mean. This mean college is kicking me out if I don't score well this semester which is nearly impossible with my current condition. I messed up this exam too!" Aman took the letter from him and put it back inside the envelope.

"I do not want anything from you Arnav. I just want to tell you that you have every f*cking thing in your life that I could never get. You sister, your grand Mom and you are following your passion!" Aman sat beside him and resumed drinking soda. "I could have gotten a transfer, but I will not because I want to prove everyone, I can f*cking do it!"

"Your Mom and Dad know about it?" Arnav asked softly.

"Yeah", Aman rolled his eyes. "They know. Mom sent me a text, I knew it, you aren't made for engineering'. I hate her attitude!"

"They see me, as if I am the reason of all this, Aman", Arnav said. "People around me blame for everything. They whisper, they judge, they..."

"And they don't know the real you, Arnav" Aman said placing palm on Arnav's shoulder. "They don't know how strong are you. Someday I will show my Mother that I can do this and someday you will show these people that you are THE ARNAV SINGH RAIZADA!"

Arnav understood, he understood Khushi's plight more than anyone and he had decided to finally comply. If leaving would heal her wound to any extent, he would not stop her.

_______

Next Day,

"Hey", Khushi knocked the open door, "can I come in?"

Anjali smiled, "yes, come in Khushi." Anjali removed her reading glasses and asked Khushi to sit. "You look tensed, what is it? You have been thinking too much lately, right?"

Khushi without answering her question jumped to the point, "I...I want to leave for Charlotte. I don't think I can do this anymore Anjali. I am alway in my zone and I can not risk your life!", she said without taking a breath.

"Okay", Anjali smiled, "if that would make you better, then you are going to Charlotte". Anjali combed Khushi's hair through her fingers and smiled. "But you know you are actually an employee of my brother, so I think you should talk to him too about this, Khushi."

"I...I did", Khushi said helplessly. "He is the whole problem, he would not just let me go!" Khushi rubbed her forehead and continued, "And that is why I am here, he would not listen to me because..."

"Because he thinks he can fix you.", Anjali smiled as she completed her sentence. Khushi looked at her surprisingly, few seconds later she realized Anjali knew her brother too well. May be most of the siblings are so close, so normal, unlike her and her brother.

"Yes", she replied staring at her palm hoping that at least Anjali would not force her to stay when she wanted to run away and hide somewhere.

Anjali sighed, "When Arnav was young and my Grandmother would cry, missing my Mother and Dad, Arnav would just switch on the TV and make her watch spongebob", Anjali chuckled. "Apparently, spongebob was the funniest thing in the world for him and he hated seeing his Nani, cry." Anjali looked at Khushi who was still staring at her palm, sniffing.

"And you know what, Nani would laugh. She would just laugh out loud", Anjali grinned through tears. "Would you like to guess, why?"

Khushi looked up, she had tears in her eyes, "Spongebob isn't the reason, I guess", both Anjali and Khushi, smiled.

"Because she was the happiest grandmother in the world whose 5 year old Grandson made every effort to make her laugh. Spongebob was trivial but Arnav's efforts weren't, Khushi." Anjali smiled and continue, "He is going to come in few minutes and tell me that he has some conference up at Yale but he is actually driving to NYU to attend some conference on Alzheimer's."

Khushi's eyes met Anjali's, "he..."

"He still thinks he can find a cure, he still thinks he can save me from this", Anjali chuckled sadly. "And I am not going to stop him. He has always been a problem solver and I am going to let him pursue a cure of this whole mess."

"Anjali...I don't know..." Khushi felt overwhelmed, she just wanted to forget everything and run into Arnav's arms and let him know, how precious he was to her.

"His quest will either end when I will almost forget everything or when he will find a cure. And I would let him continue" Anjali spoke. "He will understand your situation too, I will make him, if that is what you want."

Their conversation was interrupted by Arnav's voice, "Di! Di!" He stood at the door and refrained himself from coming inside as he saw Khushi. "I am going to deliver a lecture at Columbia, so I am gonna get late in coming back. If you need anything, just call me" Arnav turned away when he realized he was forgetting something very important. "Um...Khushi, this is your ticket to Charlotte" he kept the printout on the table near the door and walked away without waiting even a second. Khushi did not know what should be an appropriate response to his action, should she be happy that without creating any problem, he was letting her go? Or should she be disappointed because he was giving up on her?

"He simply cares for you Khushi. He booked a ticket for you." Anjali smiled and added, "and came up with new excuse to attend conference"

"What if he is actually going to Columbia?!" Khushi wondered.

"Oh, he is not! Don't judge me but I sometimes...I snoop" Anjali confessed. "This is what big sisters gotta do sometime!" Khushi laughed with Anjali.

"Go, that is your ticket which will take you from here, forever but I would ask you to meet your brother once before leaving" Anjali suggested Khushi as she sat pondering.

_____

Arnav squirmed in his sleep as he heard a knock on his door. He dismissed it and covered himself in blanket. few seconds later he again heard the knock that confirmed he wasn't dreaming. He glanced at the clock, it was 6 A.M., he panicked as realization stuck him. Only his sister could be up at this hour, is she okay? He thought. He ran toward the door, he opened it and saw Khushi Gupta standing in front of him with her hand up in the air, she was going to knock again.

"Is everything okay?" He asked, concerned.

"Yes, everything is perfect." She replied. Arnav raised his brow, Khushi took the hint and said, "I was wondering if you would like to join me for morning jog." Khushi grinned as Arnav almost shut the door on her face when Khushi stopped. "What are you doing?" She asked.

"I am obviously seeing a dream!" Arnav stated.

"Oh God! No!" Khushi to prove her point, slapped him lightly. "You are not dreaming. I am here wearing my shoes."

"What is happening?!" Arnav wondered.

"Get ready, I will explain on our way" Khushi smiled nervously.

"I will be ready in fifteen minutes", Arnav said.

_____

"Okay, I am all ears. What is going on?", Arnav asked as soon as they left home. Khushi inhaled the fresh air and smiled, "I know now, why you like getting up in the morning."

"Yeah, yeah! Lesser of that stupid jibber jabber and more of important talk, Khushi!" Arnav said, running slower than usual, to accompany Khushi.

"I...can we stop for few seconds, so that I could explain this to you?", Khushi asked.

Arnav nodded and they stopped, near the river. "Go on."

"I realized I was wrong. I realized that I was being a fool and now I will be a little selfish and never let you...or Anjali go away", Khushi looked at Arnav who had his brows knotted.

"And how did you realize that?" He asked.

"I have been a fool to let my brother and my father drive away from me but I am sane enough to not you let go...ever", she looked into his eyes and added, "till infinity."

She saw his staring at her, she was waiting for his reply but when she heard nothing coming from him, she said, "Aren't you going to say anything?"

"You know that ticket was non-refundable, this is going away from your salary." Saying that he turned around, stretched his lips into widest grin and started to run.

"I hate you!" Khushi yelled and started running.

_____

4 days Later,

"I usually spend my New Year's Eve watching new shows on Netflix", Khushi said straightening her red dress, underneath black overcoat.

"I spend with my over excited colleagues", Arnav rolled his eyes thinking about the torturous get togethers. "You look pretty, by the way." Arnav complimented Khushi as they walked on the busy side walk of Manhattan City.

"Oh my God, The Raizada, just complimented me?!" She shook her head in disbelief. "Where are we going? We should go back and kill time with TV", Khushi suggested.

"I would love to do that but I have promised my sister that this year, I would try to become...um...more normal. Thus we are going to this party." Arnav held Khushi's palm as they waited for cross signal.

"Why are you holding my hand?" Khushi asked.

"Because we are going to cross the road and Manhattan is the city of anarchy!" He explain as he held her palms firmly and began to cross the road.

He simply cares for you Khushi

Khushi looked at the man leading her to the other side of the road, the man who had always stood by her, the man who brought order to her chaos. His touch gave her a tingling sensation and also a sense of assurance that from this instant, she would not cry for peace, for care and for companionship, because she had it all. She continued to look at him, he was perfect. He had his own flaws but he was perfect for her in every sense. He was everything that she ever wanted to be. In that moment she had realized she could just spend her all life seeing his serene face, she could listen to his science-y stuff all life long, she could let him lead her through the curvy road called life, till infinity.

"We are almost there!" Arnav's announcement brought her back to reality. She looked around and found herself on the other side of the road. Arnav looked at the GPS to know their next move.

"Here, lets go" Arnav said and Khushi nodded still startled by her own thoughts.

_____

"Being normal is so...so boring!" Arnav scrunched his nose as he gulped down the whiskey. The party was hosted by one of the investors of his project. He was regretting his decision of being normal.

Khushi sat beside him, sipping, virgin Mary, "You are thinking too much. There are only...", she looked at her wrist watch and said, "three hours left for New year!"

"Thank you so much for reminding!" Arnav gulped another glass of whiskey.

"Hey! You wanna dance! I love ball dancing!" Khushi said excitedly keeping her drink away. "Oops, if you know how to dance." She laughed.

"I am a pro!" Arnav announced.

Five Minutes Later

"Ouch!" Khushi yelped in pain when Arnav stepped onto her right foot. "Your definition of pro is flawed Raizada", Khushi spared a deadly glance to a nervous Arnav.

"I...I am out of practice", Arnav defended himself.

"Wait", Khushi moved away and took a deep breath. "Hold my waist", she put his hand on her waist, "give your other hand to me", Arnav skeptically gave his other hand to her, "yes, just like that!" She smiled. "Now just don't be rigid, follow my steps." She smiled as they started to move in rhythm. "Yes, see it is simple" Arnav nodded making sure he did not step on her again. He was still uncomfortable but she enjoyed dancing and his first priority was to make her happy, even if he had to dance. After few seconds of silence Khushi asked something, it was bugging her since few days.

"You said, you know the guilt, how?" Khushi asked. Arnav flinched for a nano-second but he had been doing this since a long time, lying and hiding things from people, so he regained his calm demeanor. But he was too late, Khushi had sense something odd, something she had seen the day he had informed that he understood her guilt.

"Everyone has done something, they are guilty of." He replied with straight face.

"So you are saying that almost everyone understands what am I going through", she asked making him uncomfortable as they still moved in rhythm.

"Yes", Arnav replied curtly without giving much thought to it.

"Or may be you are hiding something. You know running away won't work because you have tried running away", Khushi said softly tracing his cheeks through her palm. He looked at her feeling, exposed. "May be your memories are imperfect too, like everyone else's", Arnav did not say anything and let her speculate. "May be you understand well because your guilty conscience doesn't let you forget what have you done, unknowingly or knowingly, Arnav", she said. She was herself confused, why was she doing it? Why was she invading someone's personal space, why was she so keen and eager to reach inside his head, share his memories. But all these questions did not stop her tonight. "May be your memories are too brutal that they don't let you live in peace."

"Ar...Arnav! Be with me buddy! Talk to me Arnav!" Aman talked to Arnav who was lying on ground outside the campus, bloody as they waited for paramedics to arrive.

Khushi had reached at the place where no one had dared to go, Arnav's Memories. Arnav stood there rooted, his hands around her waist and her hands holding her collar as she continued. "You know my guilt because you have some inside you too! Don't you?"

"I destroyed everything Aman, I am the reason! So I am not filing any case!" Arnav yelled at his roommate Aman as he sat on the hospital bed.

"You do not judge people because you have been judged before and it was excruciating" She touched his cheeks lovingly.

"That ASR guy is Indian, his name is Arnav Singh Raizada"

"Really?! He is an Indian?"

Arnav heard two Indian girls talking about him, as she stood in the line of cafeteria waiting for it to move.

"How could he do that? Our culture, our tradition!" The girl said shaking her head.

"I know right! He disgusts me too! What his parents must be thinking?" Another girl added.

"They don't think anything", Arnav turned around and answered, "because they are dead. Thanks for thinking about my parents though." Arnav left the line and walked out of the cafeteria.

"No", Arnav replied breaking her monologue. "I have no brutal memories, I am not hiding anything", they stood there of few minutes looking into each other's eyes. Who says eyes cannot lie? They lie, Arnav thought. He had mastered this skill too, over the years. Khushi could not find any hint that would give away his facade but she knew, her instincts told her, he had suffered as much as she was suffering now.

Arnav's cell phone broke their trance. He went out to pick up the call and Khushi followed him. "Yeah she is fine, don't worry. But I hope you are good. How is your chin?!" Khushi heard Arnav talking. He turned around to find Khushi with her over coat in her hand.

"It is too cold here Khushi, lets go inside", he grabbed her arm and dragged her inside.

"It was my brother", Khushi stopped him and said. "Does he call everyday?!" She asked softly, feeling hot tears in her eyes.

Arnav took a deep breath, "Yes, he calls every day twice to keep tabs on your health".

"Why doesn't he come to see me?" She asked helplessly forgetting all the things she had said few moments ago. She touched his chest and asked again, "Why?"

"Apparently you threatened him that you would kill yourself and his reason is the same as your's, guilt!" Arnav shook his head. "You think you wronged him and he thinks he wronged you." Arnav offered her handkerchief to her, "it is too cold here, lets go inside and we can talk about your brother tomorrow, okay?" he said as she nodded.

____

"Where did I keep my book?!" Anjali let out a frustrated sigh. She sat on chair, waiting for Lisa to pick her up, they were going out for dinner. Few minutes later she recalled, "Oh! Khushi's room", she got up and marched toward Khushi's room. She had been buddy reading that book with Khushi.

"There it is!" Anjali spotted the book sitting on the table beside the bed. "In your face, Alzheimer's!" She grinned as she took the book and started to leave the room when she realized she had stepped on to something. It was a paper peeking out from underneath the bed. It looked like a small paper, Anjali bent and picked it up to throw inside the trash. Anjali found that wasn't a small chit but a whole A4 sized sheet with few words written on it, in bold.

"Chasing Fireflies" She whispered. "By Joy N. Alex" She tried to remember the name of the book. She reached to her phone and typed the name in Google to see if Alzheimer's was the reason that the book seemed new or there was no book named, Chasing Fireflies'.

"What is this?" Anjali scratched her head when she found no useful link saying 'Chasing Fireflies by Joy N. Alex'. She decided not to think much about it when she received a call from Khushi.

"Hey Khushi! Are you two enjoying?" Anjali asked.

"It is just fine Anjali. Is Lisa there yet?" Khushi asked.

"She messaged me fifteen minutes ago, she will be here by 10 PM", Anjali informed, she wanted to ask about that paper when it stuck to her.

"Okay, I was just checking on you. We will be back before you, I guess, okay?" Khushi said.

"Y...yeah. Okay Khushi" Anjali hung up the call.

She again looked at the paper and deuced, "Joy...joy as in happiness...as in Khushi."

_____

Here it is, I hope you liked it. Now that I am not following my Saturday rule, I would like to inform that, I am going to update once a week but I have not fixed any day. I hope that is okay with you.

Tara's character is inspired by protagonist of a critically acclaimed book I had read a year ago. If you like I could give you the name of book 😉 It is one of the most thought provoking book ever I have read. But Tara's story is very different.