Chapter 144
RK's Pov
"When will you understand biwi that people don't hang up on me but you are My Biwi chalo Tumhe hak hai. Aur aaj ke baad to bilkul hai." He smiled at himself actually grinned as he recalled Madhu's words
"Rishabh TU phone Rakh" Seemed like she was talking to some one very close. Even though she had been very warm and at times bold with him but for the first time she had crossed the barriers of stranger hood. And he could not stop grinning stupidly.
"what happened you look like a high school boy who could not walk properly just got selected for the cricket team." Said Anurag. He had never seen him smile in such a way.
"excuse me." He tried sounding serious and he failed miserably and started laughing.
Everyone on the shoot was intrigued they had never seen him laugh like that before and then he suddenly said.
"Ho gaya tamasha. Lets get to work" He said trying again to sound as rude as he could.
"You know what I recall not so long ago I had told you that you need to find your heart to be my Kabuliwala. I think you did find it."
"Anurag Kabuliwala is still not on the floor where as Kaynaath is already nearly done. We need to wind up asap if we want release it at the date scheduled. If I were you I wouldn't bother about a man's heart, people would take it in a very different way"
"Shut up and don't forget that I am the captain."
" Aye Captain Zangoora" replied RK with his age old smirk
"For a minute I thought you had changed for good but some things just don't change." SAID Anurag giving up.
Once I was done with today's shoot which marked the end of the shooting of Kaynath and starting of Post production matters like Editing and then the fiercest promoting the film. There used to be a time when post production was not something into which actors invested their time and none of them were ever seen promoting their movie but now oh my god promotion was even a heftier task than the entire production of the Film. I breathed deeply, stage 1 accomplished. It was nearly five and I wanted to spend some lone time in my vanity. For past nearly four weeks I had been with my Biwi.
I wanted to stay away from her to sort myself of all the emotional turmoil I had been through. So many times I had wanted to talk to her but she always seemed least interested in talking she was a loner no doubt. She actually preferred talking to her self, it was funny she sometimes talked out loud instead of just brooding within. She was a loner but not a brooder instead she was a very cheerful person and unlike many others close by. She was unusually and effortlessly beautiful. Had she been in my fraternity she would have been a great hit. With that muffin face, big honey colored eyes, and skin as perfect as porcelain. She was tall he always felt he could stay upright with her in every which way. She never demanded anything from him and was more than thankful when given something forcefully.
I so wanted to tell her that she had bought me for a lifetime the day she did not kill her father. I knew the kind of pain he had caused her but knowing her I also knew that the burden of killing her brother was enough for her entire life time. She may show herself to be strong but I knew she had been slowly rotting away. I wanted to tell her that all that she did for Dipali meant a lot to me and not because Dipali meant anything to him, Instead because by helping dipali out she showed she was much above petty rivalry. She showed me the mirror quite well. I wanted to tell her that I repented every minute of 23 january the day I blackmailed her into marriage and if I could I would just rewind every thing and do a retake from our first swim in the open sea. I wanted to tell her I had fallen for her the day she had tried to protect me as a civilian and dared to swim in the most choppy sea I had seen in years to save a victim she never knew. I wanted to tell her that what ever I did till now for her was not out of anything but love. I wanted to say so many things to her. She had brought back fun in my life. I admired her courage and vulnerability both. I never had imagined I would find a woman as wonderfull as her. I loved my mom to the moon and back but I was not so close to her anymore. I was angry at her that she had so distanced herself from me after my brother's death. I was upset that she never stood up for me infront of my father. She loved me and was proud of me I knew that in all surety but then why could she not say it out loud. Man had one ability that no other spices on this earth had and that was speech yet he could not communicate his feelings. How pathetic was that but then I too instead of accepting and seeking forgiveness went ahead and committed folly's of greatest order when my heart told me otherwise, I went ahead and coerced her into a wedding that she might have never wanted. The very memory of how I tried to behave with her on their first night gave me night mares of the worst kind. I still remembered the only thought that ruled me those few days before marriage and after meeting Madhu was that I would give dad a reason to despise me and feel ashamed of me. Till date I had done nothing to earn his indifference but I will do everything to earn his hatred. I had felt that all that was mine was unconditionally given to her. I did not like it and I despised the fact that I was genuinely attracted towards her. I could not bear the idea of being hurt by a woman once again so he wanted to do something that would tear them apart but instead it brought them close together.
I had never thought that I would have gone ahead and pulled her in my bed room like a lecher. I never had to force women they came to me themselves and this made me despise them. Her resistance at first made me feel that she was acting snob because she was in her boss's house in whose good books she had always been. Then came the big mighty blow it hit me right below the belt. This was some other breed of woman I had never met. My mother was loyal but too weak. Deepali was strong but not loyal. Before I could even process what had happened we were thrown together into the sea infact I ran after her. Such strong was the urge to be with her and to see her win that I had dived at least 15 feet under the see to find her and help her save that girl on 29 th December. I had hated my self for being so vulnerable to a woman's charm. All I wanted was to get rid of her thought. It came to me every one thought that I was like my father then as he had forgotten my mother after marriage so would I once I was done with her and she was those conservative types believing in marriage. So I was left with only one option to marry her and then just forget her. What I did not ever imagine was that she could be snatched from me as ruthlessly as was my brother. In all this glamour and darker shades of grey I had actually forgotten the darkest and coldest of all things death. The minute she passed out under the stress of my assault I came back to my senses. It was as if I woke from a long coma myself. I felt alive again. I felt like I had a purpose. I remember the moment when hope revived in my entire being and made me living once again. The moment when she had called me closer to tell me she knew my secret and that I was a three year grumpy old troll. I had wanted to hug her at her innocent way of telling me that she wanted truce. I had yielded in. Can I ever forget the moment when My chain got entangled in her mangal sutra. The pendant rested on her chest with such certainity that I had longed to touch it and feel the certainty in my heart for I was nervous wreck at that time. I knew I loved her and could not deny my self her company any more.
I remember vividly those few early moments of proximity between her and me when we had ridden Jersey together. I can never forget how her entire body felt like a soothing balm on my aching body. I had been tired that day but by just being close to her and see her literally rejoice on receiving Jersey as a gift I was more than enthralled. How I had wanted to lean into her and let all my sadness just melt away. I remember my first cordial kiss to her when she had come across Deepali's saree and had not insisted on knowing more. I still remember the freshness of her spontaneous response to my kiss. I could see her pulse beating furiously at the base of her neck and at that moment had promised to my self that I would protect this innocence from the entire world with all my might.
I could not believe my stars when I had watched the interview she had given at the airport. How is one supposed to forget her desire to purchase cosmetics because she felt that all around me were more beautiful? This was the first time I saw traces of a woman in her. I could not stop laughing when she had felt sad on seeing the bill of Neiman Marcus. Any woman of those whom I had been associated with in the past would not have felt guilty because they spent their husbands money so recklessly or they got to spend but not the underprivileged ones. She still has never used any of those cosmetics. The sweetest of all moments was when she entered my washroom and fall on to me. Oh how hard it was for me to keep a control on my hands and my desires and then she went ahead and kissed me. Then her dress was wet and got stuck onto her oh it was pure torture on my masculinity. I know she was disappointed but I had promised myself that we will not have our blissful moment together merely because it was convenient to do so or because she had wanted it or because I had wanted it. I still needed to find peace with myself and that won't happen till I see her really blissfully happy with me. When all of her fears are subsided and doubts quashed. When she would be ready to take that leap of faith and tell me that she loved me and not the phenomenon that I was.
...
My phone buzzed it was Madhu I knew very well that she would be going through a gamut of emotions right now. I am sure she wanted to tell me how she felt about all that was going on but I wanted to see that on her face. This was a very special occasion for all of us we all had been through a lot and we needed this moment of sheer joy for us. I had wanted to get a beautiful lehenga for her for today but Mom had asked me with literally folded hands that she wanted Madhu to wear something she gave her. I had felt something tug at my heart while eating breakfast alone today at the table when mom was requesting me see the dress for myself and if still I did not like it I may get her what I felt right. What had my family turned out into? We were all scared to talk to each other it was only Madhu who was okay with everyone. It seemed she was the only connecting link between us. I had just got up and left in silence but could not go long because I could not stop myself any more from acknowledging the woman whom I loved the most my mother. When I had turned back the blood had drained from my mother's face as if I would reject her request. I needed to come down from my royal throne. The life was too short to nurse grudges. I could bear these distances no more and hence I moved forward and hugged my mother after ages so tightly that I literally knocked air out of her lung. She trembled like the leaf that was trembling on the waves that day. Yes I had watched Madhu for quite some time that day on the beach. I knew she was thinking about me when she collected that trembling leaf from the waves as if to protect it. Her protective instinct probably resulted from her need to protect her family from that devil of BC all her life. My mother sobbed all her pain in my chest that day it was funny I felt light and full of life once again. I guess this is what a mother is? Her mere touch can give you life. I knew it when my father talked to me today morning that he wanted to tell me that he was proud of me and that he cared for me. I for the first time felt that warmth emanating from him that I had always seen contained in his eyes. I did needed his apology I respected him enough to not make him bow down before anyone let alone me. while I insinuated Madhu that she intervened in my personal relations yet again I knew she had been eves dropping for quite some time. You see I can feel her presence around me. I was proud of her when she entered and stopped my dad from apologizing she did a favor not only for him but a greater one for me. Nothing on this Earth can ever prepare me to see tears in my father's eye. I would prefer to close my eyes forever that seeing such a day. I was angry with him and wanted to hurt him but never wanted him to be defeated by any one let alone me. I would always want him to be the arrogant man from whom I got my traits. I was proud of him very proud. I must leave for home or Madhu would definitely shoot me right between the eyes for she had a license to kill as she loves to say. You know I was just kidding I guess I want my childhood back.
...
Madhu had been calling me for quite some time now odd thirteen calls and as many sms later I was driving back home today. My home, which was going to see this kind of festivity for the first time in long long time. It was much over due. When I reached VrindaVan yes that was the name that our house had but was visible to me only today. Someone had got the plaque bordered with the broad Radha krishna frame that I had once carved in marble and had got meenakari done on it from Rajasthan but then never came around to putting it on the name plaque on our front wall. Someone had got it done not only that it was done in such a way that a lighting was put behind it to illuminate it further. I Saw dad on the terrace next to my room and himself wiping away the baluster of the rails
"shit whatever is he upto" I felt a sting in my throat.
The house inside was in a state of pandemonium. I could not believe what I saw. Every nook and cranny was decorated tastefully. Somebody had raided my entire stash of artworks and installed them in place. This could not be achieved in a matter of hours someone worked on it for more than a couple of weeks. I felt it had something to do with Trishna or Roma for the kind of artistic taste this kind of arrangement needed was either in Roma or in Trishna all others were artistically challenged. The entire ceiling had been adorned in rows and rows of led Lanterns hung from invisible wire. It looked like candles were just floating in air. The entire house smelled of Sandal and Mogra. The decor was as Indian as it could get, with bright colors on display in form of Curtains and the huge painting of Shankuntala being given a ring by Dushyanta done in Pahari school of art adorned the center of the hall with a canopy installed around it. I had painted it when I was in love with Deepali. Funny thing was I had wanted to paint Deepali as Shakuntala but this was 95 percent resembling to Madhu and did not resemble Deepali in any which way. If we gave this modeI a moder casual wear she would actually look exactly like Madhu. I was actually shocked it was weird. I had to bow down to the Devine miracle. That, what I did not consciously know was mine was actually somewhere in sub conscience.
"Yeh kab banayi thi?" Shadi ke baad to hum bahut jaldi USA chale gaye wahan to tumne painting kin ahi. Were you stalking me from a long time?" said Madhu keeping her hand on my shoulder. She looked miffed and quite upset even though I could see joy sparkling from her irisis.
"tum Tayyar nahi hui." I asked feeling a alittle overwhelmed and circling my arm around her waist. With her at my side I suddenly had confidence that all will be well soon.
"Nahi and I am not attending this function, you also knew all of it all the time. It was only me who was kept in the dark. I am very angry."
"Flare your nostrils a little more so that your already round face looks even more round. Golgappi"
"Golgappa me!!!! I mean no one in his right mind would call me gol gappa. I am well built but not round and I am going to stay like this today so that all who come today know that how my family has outcasted me."
"common Biwi you know very well they wanted to surprise you." I said getting a little impatient at her jeans and grey drab shirt and snickers. This was ridiculous the entire family was already decked up in their best possible attires. Ma was wearing pretty orange Paithani I recall buying it after I collected the stipend from my 4 months at residency. It was not too expensive but my mother looked beautiful in it. I saw Dad coming down with Malik and Dad too wore the blue brocade sherwani I had brought for him on my first visit from med school. I was living I doubted. Was it all even real?
"Madhu please change beta we just wanted to make you happy. We knew this would make really happy that is why we kept it as a surprise." Malik said holding Madhu by her shoulders with such affection that it literally soaked the entire surrounding.
"Oh! Yes but you shocked the hell out of me." And she stomped away to my dad's office. She was beyond stubborn today. I agree it might have come as a shock that her didu was getting engaged today to Doctor Aniket Trihan and everyone knew except her. She married a devil for her and she was feeling betrayed.
"Rishu hum samjha samjha ke thak gaye iska to gussa hi kam nahi ho raha. Itna bola Trishna aur Roma ne ki saath chal le parlour par gayi hi nahi beta. Abhi sab aa jayeinge, ek ghanta to reh gaya hai. Saat to baj gaye hain. Padmini ji ki bhi nahi sun rahi." Said radhaji really feeling like traditional mother inlaw since today her son gave her the right on not only himself but his wife too. He couldn't help but smile at the urgency in his mother's voice had it been any other day she would have maintained her distance and watched everything helplessly as she had watched when he married Madu.
"I think I will talk to her." This was his father. I was too overwhelmed by every thing that was happening now and had happened already
"Zada khushi bhi digest nahi hoti." I said to my self. I jerked my head.
"Kya hua Dulhe raja zor ka jhatka laga kya. Jab Madhu se shadi kar rahey they zabadasti tab nahi pata tha." This was the icing on the cake ROMA the biggest dramatist of all times. I could not believe my fortune. I had landed my self very safely in a zoo.
I wanted to say something caustic but nothing came to my mind. There was this thing called jetlag and then this engagement and above all Madu's tantrum. I strode towards the office and entered in to see Madhu sitting on the couch with her legs crossed and she was even wearing snickers. Oh how I hated to see someone sit with shoes on the bed or sofa. They had not yet noticed me.
"Madhu bat samjho all your hard work and sacrifice will go in vain. Trishna will feel you are jealous of her."
"jealous of her let me cross check, why is any one jealous of some one. If they find the other better than themselves, so starting with my self.
I am taller, much better built, much more beautiful , well placed, and well loved by my family. I don't see a reason for any one to think I would be jealous of Trishna. Now to our husbands,
They both are good looking but mines is far better you also know that. He resembles you, you know that don't you. He is far more wealthier, Far more intelligent, oh he is so much more than all the men put together. Any one thinking that I would be jealous of Trishna because of Aniket needs to get their brain checked by Aniket."
I could take her rambling no longer she was playing around and enjoying this attention. I knew that I needed to pull the curtain this drama.
"Aniket dimag ka doctor nahi hai. He is an endocrinologist. If you are done trying to prove my horse is bigger than hers please get up and get ready."
I saw dad smiling and then he left. I thanked him because in front of him I wont be able to make Madhu do my bidding.
"Aap kahan jaa rahey hain sir?"
"tum dono to ready ho nahi to welcome the guests. To kissi ko to karna hoga na."
"haan theek hai?" she said trying to hold on to her silly obstinacy.
"Madhu will come up with me your self in a very civilized way and get dressed or should I become the monster they think I am."
"what makes you think I don't think you are a monster."
"wo isslie ki if you think I am a monster then you should be sure that you will have children like monster too." I said sitting next to her. I was feeling drowsy like an owl at sunrise.
"huh kyoun mere bacche tum par kyoun jayenge Ji wo apni mummy par jayeinge."
"arrey meri ma chal rahi ho ya main utha ke le jao."
"don't even try that. I am not some size zero dainty heroine."
"and I am not some chocolate boy either"r and within a second I lifted her up and swirled her on my right shoulder . I had taken just a few steps when she started pleading
"RK! RK! put me down I will come with you I promise." I knew she always meant her words so I put her down.
"Ok I will come with you" she said haughtily and walked past me. whatever had gotten into her little head was way beyond my understanding. I had never seen her behave like this. I knew she was yet not over with her tantrum. Once in the room I asked
"Biwi yeh sab kya bachpana hai."
"Bachpana RK.?" I so longed to hear Rishabh from her but she just did not oblige.
"what else would you call it?" I was resigned now.
"My entire family failed to tell me that my sister was getting engaged in my own house. I had wanted to be apart of the preparations and had wanted to enjoy the whole process which I never had an opportunity to enjoy. I wanted to choose dresses choose songs that would be played. Choos the menu atleast be apart of all the arrangement. They don't need me. no one needs me." she started choking and I could get her point
"You knew it all along did you not?"
"If it can give you any solace, no I did not. I came to know about it from Aniket in the morning. Look Madhu I have lived my entire life in this desire of being needed and appreciated. Don't do this to yourself. While I know that every one out there needs you and love you I know with all certainty that atleast I cant live without you." She looked away from me.
"I know it would hurt to see everything going in such a normal way for someone else when you had nothing of that sort. It is not in my power to change it. What I can do is to beg for you forgiveness."...she just stopped me from saying any thing further.
" It is not about us, it is about me." she insisted trying to free me of my guilt but she her self was not convinced.
"biwi it can never be about you alone.." I held her hands in mine and lifted her chin to make her look at me. I was not prepared for what I saw next, her eyes were brimming with tears and once again she fall apart and cried as much as she could.
"why are you so sad biwi? Look at me. meri taraf dekho you don't want to go for that engagement no one is going to force you. I give a damn about what people will say. I will stay with you here? Tell me what is bothering you thus. Kuch to bolo please Madhu." She now had her face once again nuzzled into my neck and her tears were staright away soaking the skin on my chest. I could understand that she was upset and not just upset was really sad. Something much more deeper had hurt her.
"I came back after confronting That devil incarnate. I literally would have lost my life there if not for you remember the govt had messed it up real bad. When I met Ma today she did not even care to ask once about how I endured all of that shit. She just went on blabbering about Trishna and her engagement and what all they were doing for the party. Party wo bhi mere ghar par par mujhse poochne ki zarrorat nahi samjhi kissi ne." she now blew her nose in the hanky that I gave her.
"Madhu you know your mother might just not want to talk about it. Do you think it is easy for her she lost her son just a month back. She is trying to sound normal she is not. She is now called wife of Malik how can she be interested in the life or death of someone who is responsible for such weird life that she had. And as long as I live babes trust me nothing will happen to you." She hugged me again understanding dawning upon her for the indifference of her mother.
"It has ages since we celebrated anything lets celebrate Trishna's engagement with all our hearts. She has suffered a lot too imagine how difficult it would be for her to accept her genes. It's no joke she deserves this happiness and so do you after all that you have done don't ruin it for your self." She nodded in acquiescence. "Get ready now you only have half an hour. Can change on your own or should I call Rajni to help you wear what ever mom has given. Did you see it? Did you like it?"
She sulkily pointed at the beautiful bandhej lehenga and odhani kept on the bed in deep crimson and green color. It had a very pretty embroidery on it. On seeing that dress I just felt like going and hugging my mom. Even If I had paid my designer a million rupees she could not have come up with some thing so unique and traditional.
"do you like it." she asked still rubbing her eyes and nose.
" go change and I will call Rajni to fix the duppata mean while I will also change." I was about to get up when I felt her hand press on my shoulder and urging me to keep kneeling on the floor.
"It was not about our wedding. I just felt left out." Her eyes were watering up again. I could not endure her this way. She looked beautiful in all her power and might not this helpless. I took her hand in mine she continued "I also cannot imagine a minute without you. I love you too much and ..."even before she could say a word more I hugged her I knew she loved me she might have said them before but they never held the conviction than they held today.
"we need to dress up and you need to smile for me." I urged. "I am calling Rajni." I said.
"I don't need her I can wear clothes my self." She still sulked.
"Madhu this dress is heavy and has even heavier dupatta. You will need help to fix it properly." I tried to reason with her.
"I just wonder why don't our women do much better in weight lifting than other countries. We are supposed to carry atleast a 100 kilos in our every day life on us."
"when was the last time you wore something like this. If it is so repulsive you can join us in whatever you like." I said getting impatient I did not want to enter into one of these feminist debate anyway. She understood that the talk time was over so she pulled the attire and left for the dressing room
"bhej do Rajni ko yeh to poori duniya ka bojh mere upar daal diya hai. I will make you suffer for this."she told me shooting darts of glare right through my heart. I would have showed her how I could make her suffer only if we did not have an engagement to attend.
...
She came out in 15 minutes just wearing the dress and no makeup or jewellery. Even without all of that I was unable to take my eyes of her. The red suited her very well.
"You look shocked, but also very handsome, husband."
"Why my lady I was shocked by your electrifying appearance."
"Am I looking alright in this. You know I am wearing something so magnificient for the first time in my life. I always thought these things were meant for like real women." She said feeling more than conscious of her attire and no doubt that she was wearing something so beautiful for the first time because the lehenga that she wore for the wedding was too light when compared to this. I believe mom had put in all she could into this one dress. I just hope she does not out shines Trishna after all it was her day. I dragged her infront of the vanity and she looked perplexed.
"I am not going to wear all this." She said seeing a heavy Mughal set and kangans. I made her sit and asked Rajni to help her for I needed to put in my buttons on the kurta that I wore. This too was given for the day by ma,and was maroon in color. She tried to color us in the same color and it did work. when I saw she was giving a hard time to Rajni in wearing the jewellery I asked her to leave.
"What do you want Madhu?"
"This is too flashy."
"It is meant to flash people with its beauty." Though I would have to say that the jewelry was too heavy any thing far more lighter and delicate would have worked much better. I gave into her wish and asked "accha chalo do some make up."
"uske bina chalega nahi."
"to tell you the truth no it wont work because you are looking too beautiful like this." I tucked a stray hair behind her and gave her my buttons so that she could put them in place.
"You are trying to flirt but it was of no use."
"Why do I see your cheeks turning this delicious shade of pink if it was of no use."
"I am not blushing."
"alright you are not blushing but ab jaldi karo." I saw Rajni coming in again and I was about to leave when she held on to my hand.
"If I am looking so good why can I just come like this."
I whispered some thing in her ears and then left her shocked, eyes as wide as saucers. While leaving I told her,
"I will ask ma to give you some other jewelry to wear."
I left her to do her wish tired of reasoning with her. Madhu was a stubborn and getting her to do your bid was a very difficult task. I don't know why but at this moment I thanked my stars that I coerced her to marry me else is janam mein to possible nahi thi.
...
Madhu' POV
I touched my red hot cheek which turned scarlet now because I just had curled inside out hearing what RK told me. I was still reeling in after shock and could hear my heart in both my ears loud and clear.
"You look like a woman who just left the bed of her lover in a hurry because it is only then that she is sans jewelry and makeup and hair tousled like this"
"mam aap haath hataiye tab to makeup laga paongi. Vaisey zada zaroorat nahi hai aapko aap aisai bahut sunder lag rahi hai."
"oh shut up Rajni theek se lagao just cover it all up."
"Kya mam kya cover karoon, you are spotlessly beautiful."
I closed my eyes so that she could do her bit. Just then there was a knock on the door and Ma came in with another maroon Box. The jewelry this time was a simple necklace in emralad and jhumkas and a mang tikka.
"I did not have any kangan that would match with this outfit Madhu."
"I will wear these." I kept quiet while she put all the accessories in place.
"Rajni tum jao main baal thik kar doongi...you have the most beautiful hair one can ever imagine."I looked up at her, I was feeling really bad for my abrupt and rude behavior today.
"I am sorry ma"
"for what Madhu? Vaise bhi tu aur Rishu ek jaise hi ho ek jhakki dusri jalli."
Ma only took a couple of minutes to roll my hair into a beautiful Juda choti, and adorned it with gajra. I for once in my life felt like a women in that delicate way or rather artistic way. I was dying to see RK's reactions.
"Madhu wo log aatey honge 15 -20 minutes mein. They are on their way. Come down now.
"Give me a minute ma." She left with a nod. I needed those few minutes alone for there was still one accessory that I needed to wear today for today was the day when I had not only accepted my feelings but also reciprocated it with all my heart. I was not scared of anything anymore. To me all that mattered was being close to him. I went to my wardrobe to open the box that housed that precious accessory that I had kept safe from the very day I had got it initially hoping that some day in the face hope and joy I will hold it with much love and huge dreams. The thing is the very idea of being a normal husband and wife is a lofty dream for me. I have only come across broken relations and shattered dreams hence what seems a normal dream for any Indian middle class girl seemed a farfetched idea to me. I was shocked to see that the box had one of the pieces missing because it only had one of it. I think you know what I am talking about the Raga watch he gave to me in the hospital as a wedding gift. Which he had wanted me to keep. I wanted to wear it today and also wanted RK to wear his today but his was already missing. Who could have taken it? I was very upset and was about to rush outside in sheer agony to turn the house upside down yet again when I banged into him.
"Are you looking for this." He said steadying me with one hand on my waist and showing the watch on his left wrist.
"Haaan...haan!!" I exclaimed "how did you get it."
"I found the keys to it in your jacket and took out my share of hope and wore it today hoping that you would also wear yours."
Taking a deep breath I wore mine.
"They are here we must go down." He said his hand still holding me and reminding me of what he had said to me this evening and I turned crimson again. While I did desire his closeness with every drop of my blood but want and reality are always something different.
...
RK POV.
She did not see me when I had entered in looking for her. I had seen mom leaving our room smiling to herself meant that mission was accomplished. When I saw her for a moment I felt she was a drop nectar from some divine flower. Perfect and life giving as radiant as sun itself and in that instant I had no other desire but to behold her and to drown deep into her brightness. My trance was broken with the sound of a click. She had just opened the box that she had used to keep my first gift.
We were down even before I could soak myself in my beloved's essence, her beauty and her love. I did not want to leave her side but sticking on to her was doing no good either. I was perplexed by the intensity of my own feelings. One moment I wanted to hold her, cherish her and worship her and the other I wanted nothing else but solitude. The entire engagement ceremony had passed in a daze for me. What happened and how it happened nothing registered in my mind. I did dance and cracked jokes. I laughed like a silly teenager with her. I am sure every one noticed my silliness, but I did not care nor did I have eyes and thoughts for anyone but Madhu tonight. The senior citizens had already left but the juniors were just not ready to leave I guess they were enjoying too much on my account. It was nearly 2:00 Am in the morning
"what happened Rishabh you did not even take a single drink how about we all share a taquilla shot."
"Nope I am not drinking." I told Aniket "moreover Madhu also does not drink" He looked up to Trishna to seek confirmation.
"She does but only coke that too in liters." Trishna said looking at her sister fondly but she was busy caressing her watch.
"yeh us ghadi mein kya hai Madhu tab se use hi nihaar rahi hai. Koi aane wala hai kya? Are you waiting for something." Trishna asked looking frustrated at her lost state of mind.
"No more coke for her diet or other wise." RK said
"Madhu tera coke band ho gaya? Tu maan gayi?" It was Trishna again. Madhu just gave her nod smiling. In the wee hours of the morning every one left. RK looked at Madhu expectantly but Madhu was now phased out. Once in their room RK went to change and Madhu sat on the bed waiting for her turn.
She woke up with a start the sun shone with all its might on her face. someone had forgotten to pull the curtains. She saw Radha ji was entering with a cup of tea. RK was no where to be seen and she was still all decked up and her head hurt.
"what time is it ma?" she asked holding her head in her hands.
"12:30, have this and then freshen up. You have a joint meeting at 2 with the home secretary and Comissioner of police your sir asked me to remind you."
"arrey haan hey bhagwaan I forgot" I sprang of the bed to the washroom to get ready forgetting my headache. I had already over slept. By the time I got ready It was one.
"RK kahan hai ma" I asked ma on the dinning table buttering my whole grain bread with some olive oil. I was now used to this style of calculated food.
"he left early since the post production on the movie was in full swing."
"ek baat to bataiye RK bahut kam sotey hain. Has he been like that always."
" haan more of less like that." She said in a distant tone.
"par this is not good for health."
"health reminded me, you need to take you medication. How are you now? All this hustle and bustle did not give me an opportunity to talk to you about your health. Rishabh had sent your reports to Aniket and I had asked about you from him. Mujhey bahut accha laga yeh jaan kar ki tum theek ho jaogi. Mere liye to tum hi meri khushi ka karan ho."
I looked at her eyes and saw not only concern but also a request to take care of my self. I felt a tug at my heart. I was lucky to have her. I took the medicine from her hand and gulped it down with water and left after giving her a hug like I always did with my mom. Things seemed so much more normal now.
RK's post production and promotional activities were even more hectic than I had imagined I saw less and less of RK and then we were also closing in on the drug racket. Most of the players were arrested the main one was sitting in Assam and we finally needed to go to Assam and conduct a joint raid to nab the high command of this entire racket. If every thing goes as per plan I am certain this bust would be a major star in my career and so it would be for sir. Balraj's case was also progressing quite well. Deepali was no more in close touch with RK after her shoot finished she moved to America for good and opened her own dance school. She had always been a very good Dancer. She deposed in our favor.Malik and ma had gone to USA to depose against Balraj. She had been strong and in the face of such trauma. She had faced balraj in the court with great courage and dignity and never lost her composure, though she had Malik on her side yet I knew it first hand how unsettling my father could be. I was proud of my mother and couldn't wait to meet her. I was waiting alone at the air port to receive my mother who was coming from USA and my husband who was coming back from one of the promotional events in Delhi. The judgement was reserved by the USA court and would be delivered in a couple of weeks. I had moved beyond him anyways he comes back or does not was no more my concern. I was certain that he would be put to death there if not hear.
Nearly five weeks had passed since Trishna's engagement and her wedding was scheduled for May 17 it was already 1st week of April and post production of Kaynath was in full swing. I never knew actors took part in editing etc. How naive I was actually editing saw a lot of producer influence. Depending on towards whom the producer was inclined the rolls of people got clipped and chopped. RK told me it was because of this that he always took interest in post production. He also enjoyed sound direction. I would be absolutely right if I say that RK had his one toe in every puddle. I was getting anxious by the way this entire film creation thing went on. I had so wanted either Trishna to change her wedding date or RK to get his movie release date postponed. Unfortunately both were on the seventeenth of May.
...
I was feeling like wire as taught as it could be pulled. A single tug and I would snap. It was early morning and Trishna was having some weird cold feet for I don't know what. You see I cannot understand it because today she was marrying some one who loved her for who she is not judged her for her genetic configuration. What was there to be nervous about was beyond my contemplation. I had married RK knowing that my life was going to be hell which ofcourse did not happen, but yet I never had a cold feet. She had asked me to get her favorite album from our book rack and I was looking for it. it actually had loads and loads of books on space science. It struck me RK had once been to our room and precisely this is where he had found out about my interest in Astronomy. It reminded me of my wonderful visit to Griffith observatory. I took a deep breath. My life has been too boring for past many weeks now. I keep waiting for some change on our personal front but waiting is all I am doing. Ofcourse if you would exclude my two week stay in Assam to nub the master of this entire drug racket I had been working on this since past two years and you will also have to forget the loads of appreciation I got for accomplishing my first assignment with great success. You would also need to exclude that I had to go for two of RKs promotional visits to various cities. I had gone to Lucknow with him and from there he had also taken me to our ancestral house in Itawa. He also dragged me along to Bangluru for his promotion. I did get a few more gifts from him. I actually learnt that giving gifts was his way of telling people that he cared for them but if you don't appreciate his gifts he very well knew how to extract it. The time passed at a speed could not even imagine and we were being unceremoniously stuffed by my mom into a van and shoved towards the parlor. I had no clue why I needed to dress up in a parlor but RK had insisted that a lot of his aquaintances would be there and I would feel out of place. RK and I both missed the premier of Kaynath because we had a most precious pre nuptials going on. My cell phone rang
"where are you Biwi?"
"Parlor mein"
"When will you guys be done in the parlor?"
"I don't know these guys are brushing up Trishna every minute seems like they will take forever."
"What about you are you ready?"
"I am and I forgot to tell you that the beauticians were drooling over my cosmetics so much that they are no more good for use."
"So in other words Na kajre ki dhaar na motiyon ke haar."
"Nope I could not evade it today Kajre ki dhar bhi hai or motiyon ke haar bhi hain."
"hai sachi?" he said as if he was a girl. I know he was mocking me."
"Ok I am supposed to be a bridesmaid and I am sitting here and being a laughing stock of my husband." My frustration clearly evident in my tone . I was tired with these huge amount of draining ceremonies associated with weddings. Trishna loved it and I was happy for her but these were not my cup of tea.
"kya hua Bahadur? What makes you sound so iffy?"
"Kuch nahi you wont understand." I said resigning my self to yet another evening of heavy clothes and jewellery and makeup and songs and dance. Not that I did not enjoy it but it was too long for my taste.
"I do understand and would come to pick you both up in half an hour that should be enough."
"Tell me something Didu will you be able to walk in this."
"glycerine, I don't have to run a marathon today. I am a bride for God sake." She said beaming with excitement. She was truly looking beautiful in her scarlet lehenga and beautifull jewellery which also included the pieces that her mother Gafuran had bequeathed her. I for one was happy to see that she did so. She had made me run from pillar to post for this special lehenga now I knew why she had wanted a dress to match the jewellery. I forgot all my exhaustion and hugged. My vision became translucent and I could see Gafuran blessing both of us today.
"I am so happy for you today didu." I said clearing my throat.
"you know why Roma gave you this name?" she asked me.
"because you don't cry you make others cry. Jabse teri Shadi hui hai tu bahut jaldi se ro jaati hai. Dekhne se to tere aur RK ke beech mein sab theek lagta hai par kya sab theek hai Madhu?"
"Arrey haan meri sister India." I said laughing "nothing could have been better." She showed me her crossed fingers.
...
" Bhabhiji chief ko nikale huey 20-25 mins ho gaye hain." This was bittuji's call to inform us to be ready for RK's bouncer. In precisely 20 minutes RK was there of course I was informed about him from his bouncer. These days since he was too active with his promotion he moved with his guards more than before. I looked at him uncomfortably while getting inside the car.
"what I did offer to you to become my bouncer. You never agreed to is pahar ko rakhna para."
"did I say any thing?" I said leaning my head back in his van I needed to rest desparately.
"not in so many words."
"RK please I need peace." I was shocked that he obliged.
"to Trishna what should we gift you for your wedding."
"ab yaad aa raha hai wedding gift?" Didu was clearly enjoying and I was happy for her. After this what they talked about was all a blur to me as I had got my much needed nap. I didn't even know when we were home.
"Sleeping beauty we are home." He poked me a little too unkindly and I woke up with a startle.
"Glycerine only someone like you could sleep in such a stressfull situation" it was Didu looking seriously scandalized. I couldn't prevent my giggle escaping. RK was now used to my on run naps but me and didu had not been in the same car as often as before for quite some time now. Actually after my posting I mostly moved in my jeep and she in her luxury car. We did enjoy our time together but we mostly met at a place pre decided. We hardly drove together.
"Thanks to my training Didu" I said
"sona bhi sikhatey hain" she asked mocking me.
"sab kuch"
"thoda Romance bhi bol sikha dein."
"wo bhi sikhatey hain unko jinko seekhna hota hai. Mujhey zaroorat nahi pari."
"arrey bevakuf bahut zaroorat hai. Tera pati apni aankh tere se hata nahi paa raha tha pata nahi kaise apne haathon ko roka usne aur tu so gayi. Kya bilkul dabba band dhakkan Jam hai kya tu." I looked back to see If RK might have heard all this rubbish but thankfully he was catched by Mallik as soon as he stepped out of the car.
"tu ek baat to bata Madhu?"
"tumhari shadi hain didu" I whispered in her ears "and there is so much stress soch na aur kuch mat pooch."
"tu sun pehle meri baat ka jawab de?" we were now in her room all by ourselves and I knew she what she was about to ask. I had been evading this question for quite sometime now but it seems the ras devi inside didu would now shower me with her gyan no matter how hard I avoided her.
"pooch" I said in a resigned tone.
"tujhe RK ne kabhi kiss kiya hai"
"Do I look like a lizard? No right hence he can kiss me without fear."
"Lagta to nahi hai tum dono ko dekh kar or rather tumko dekh kar but chal maan leti hoon"
I knew the bouncer was yet to come and there it came.
"are you guys physically close." She asked hesitantly, while I did not doubt her intentions my marriage had always been out of gossip market no matter who was talking about it.
"no comments." I said in a tone determined as ever. She knew I won't budge nor will my expressions give away a thing. We may not be related by blood but I guess we were related by everything else. I knew if I wont budge so wont she.
"look Madhu there is no marriage in this world which sustains on Platonic relations. I will leave it at that."
"Thank God" I was beyond relieved. Ma came in and as usual she had tears in her eyes. She hugged Trishna, I some how wanted to give them privacy so had to leave. I went on to the terrace that we had. After some time Ma joined me too.
"Madhu I know you have been kind of left alone these past few weeks" she was finding words to say some thing and since I was not facing her she mad me turn towards her. I saw recognition in her eyes and then pain. She needed to sit, it had come flooding back. The pain of deception, dejection and humiliation. I made her sit on the chair,
"Where did you find it? Did she give it to you? Why did you take it?" she had remembered it quite well. She was anxious about it but not sure what to do with it. she touched it with hands as gentle as a butterfly.
"Gafuran Bi gave it to me in her last minutes ma. She wanted me to tell you that she had never worn it ever. She was sorry that it was given to her in such a sadistic way. She had said it has lot of sad memories attached to it. She had asked me to wear it when I was happiest in my life. I just chose to honor a dead person's words." She nodded in understanding. All those ominous thoughts now quiting her face and the very idea that I was wearing the neckless that was once mercilessly pulled from her neck by her very husband on her wedding night and given to his paramour because I was happiest today setting in. she smiled again satisfied that I found joy and contentment in my own life away from her.
"tu kaisi hai Madhu ? These past few months you have grown much greater and I could not even see you achieve these heights. I am sorry beta I was always burdened by my conscience of being just towards Trishna that I almost took you for granted." She hugged me and was crying. "I am alright ma never have been better, I tried to convince her." She knew that even if my voice was shaky I was not lying she smiled and left because. Mrs Jain our Governess cum housekeeper, cum event manager came in and informed that the barat should be here any minute.
I came back to Didu who was looking as beautiful as full moon I sat there for a little while and then went out looking for my dear husband. I don't know about him but I was having jitters thinking about his movie. I sent a silent prayer upwards hoping that it would atleast be moderately successful. RK had told me not to believe on any news before Sunday morning and also had specifically prohibited me to hear any news before Sunday morning about the movie. Desperation is never someone's best friend and right now it was accompanying me like a puppy does his mother. I took deep breath once in open air and looked up trying to steady my nerves.
The barat was finally here and I thought to my self final the last function and prayed for Didu's happiness for a second. Dr. Aniket was one of the best human beings I had ever come across. I felt a weird sense of joy within me. All the rituals took place in a comfortable camaraderie and took place as scheduled on time. RK had not been anywhere near me the entire night. He was mostly either with Mallik or entertaining guests. RK's mom had been fawining over me like crazy adjusting my necklace or my mangtikka or asking me to eat time and again. She actually had enjoyed the wedding the most. I learnt that she actually enjoyed rituals a lot not as in superstitious about them but enjoyed them.
The phereas were about to start in half an hour, I was sitting next to my mother inlaw. She whispered "Madhu do you recognize Aniket's shoes."
"Hain shoes???" I was shocked why was she asking for his shoes.
"no what happened to them are they lost or what. Dulhe ka joota chori ho gaya kya?" I panicked and my mother inlaw laughed her heart out. For the first time I saw her laughing like that. She looked actually beautiful.
I couldn't believe when she discussed stealing the shoes and all.
"have you not seen Hum aapke Hain kaun."
That movie and movies like them never fit my genre of choice. I either enjoyed comedy or something with a more serious tone to it. These family, family things were never in my forte and RK's movies were always something that were too sensible. He actually edged towards artsy cinema, probably that is why I was always an ardent admirer of his work. Now knowing how much effort he put into his work I was more so in love with what he did. So back to reality I did not know what stealing shoes meant in weddings but still did it because ma insisted. Extorting money out of that was too fun filled an exercise and I actually enjoyed it. The wedding was over very nicely and ma and mallik look exhausted. I was eager to know how RK's movie faired and hence wanted to check the news but right now even my phone chose to give up on the battery. We all were ready to go back home. Trishna had already left and would be coming tomorrow for pag phera. I recalled that was the first time RK had come to my place after wedding. I looked over to him he was talking to his father, that stress that prevailed between them had reduced a lot. I guess cloaks that age old will take time to dissipate completely. Ma broke my chain of thoughts,
"Madhu I had never expected that you would adjust so well in your family. Your Mil Cares for you"
"I do love her."
"I can see that."
She hugged me and I could feel her sense of relief.
"chalein padmini ji." sir joined his hands in front of ma "tum rukogi kya?" he asked me " you are on leave today also."
" yes sir I had taken these two days leave."
"no actually we have to be somewhere." I looked at RK a little surprised as he never told me that we needed to go somewhere this early it was not even 4 in the morning.
"Itni subah." This was sir and I was glad he questioned his son.
" A friends griha pravesh pooja and we have to go to Pune so good three hours Drive. Raaste mein Farm house pe bhi rukna hai." Thank God he responded properly without his acerbic one liners. He now used them rarely but he did.
" Theek hai pahunch ke phone kar dena." We finally left in for our respective cars.
...
"you are going to Drive are you not tired?" I asked concerned.
"Since you are aware I am tired how about you settle down next to me amicably instead of hounding me with questions like all normal stupid Biwis"
"If RK stops spitting venom how can he remain RK"
"Ask Chetan to follow us in your van." He said reversing the car and coming on the main road.
We had been driving silently for 20 minutes. My cell was charged enough and I wanted to check box office news.
"What are you searching for?" he pulled the phone from my hands and threw it on the back seat.
"what was that? I want to see something."
"I know what you want to find out. I told you wait till tomorrow morning only then can you get a real idea of what is going on."
"yes mr know all."
"Tell me something Biwi why are you grungy out of the blue."
"whose house warming are we going to, Vasant's"
"what from where did she come in?"
"Pune mein to wahi hai tumhari dost"
"Madhu I don't have friends strewn all over the country and we are not going to Vasant's"
"we are going to pune but not to vasant's"
"I don't like this when you play this sneaky peaky role with me."
"what would you like me to play then?" he asked his tone had changed and I suddenly felt a weird sensation coursing through me. I was sure he was upto something what I had to find out.
"Which song Biwi." I chose to remain quite.
Kabhi yun bhi aa meri aankh mein
ki meri nazar ko khabar na ho
Muhey ek raat Nawaz do
Magar us raat ki sahar na ho
There was always a tangible undercurrent of desire and yearning between us. Any thing that would appear mundane to normal person could flare already flying embers. Today the beautiful ghazal by Jagjit singh made my throat go dry. I somehow felt all my bahadur panti drain out of my body. He did have impeccable choice when it came to anything under the sun then this was music and poetry we are talking about. The lyrics actually worded our life together very well.
"tujhey bhoolne ki dua karoon
To dua mein meri asar na ho."
He hummed along with the music and I could not resist a smile. How ironic was this similarity. I am sure our conscious minds must have feverishly desired to forget each other but I guess unconsciously we never wanted our wishes to come true.
"you looked ethereal Madhu." This came out of nowhere and after the entire wedding was over. I actually had been secretly grudging his non acknowledging behavior towards me. I wanted and craved for his attention
"bahut der baad yaad aaya?" I could not resist venting out my frustration and he smiled a crooked smile.
"Dukes mein rukne ka man hai?"
"nahi. I don't want to eat anything." He was acting strange and I did not like it. I always enjoyed his acidic banters. Anything other than that caused severe trepidation and my heart over worked for no apparent reason. I could hear it very clearly in my ears. This man was seriously either bipolar for he could change himself at the drop of hat or he kept himself cloaked for the fear that if someone saw his gentler and softer side he might misuse it.
"you are wearing Gafuran's necklace?"
"hmm"
He took a sharp turn towards the thin road to our farmhouse. I recalled it would take half an hour to the farm house. I thanked my stars that he chose to remain silent the rest of our way.
...
The mornings were always early here and the entire farm was up and running by the time we reached there. Belamma welcomed us along with Jugni and her three RKs. I couldn't stifle a giggle on seeing RK s grumpy face when he saw all the three kiddos.
"I need to get them going to school and will make sure I change their names."
"By what authority?" I smiled
"Copyright infringement is something I guess" he said "you must be aware of it...kanoon and all."
"Bhaiya ji chai nashta lagva dein?"
"haan jugni lagwa do."
"Papa ko call kar lena Madhu." I stopped for a few seconds right where I was. He was gone I guess to freshen up and my heart did many a cartwheels. I crossed my fingers and sat on the courtyard. Jugni came with a glass of butter milk for me. she remembered that I was on a different kind of diet.
"bhaiya ji ki chai ban gayi hai bula laon Bhabhi."
"nahi wo aa jayeinge." I wanted to give him time. If my heart was doing cartwheels I am certain he would be splashing his face with water atleast forty times. This was his ritual every time he crossed the lines created by time and circumstances.
"Bhabhi aapki behan ka byaah ho gaya thik se."
"hmm" I did wonder how she knew but for now I was relishing the freshest ever buttermilk.
"aap bahut sunder lag rahi hain."
"thankyou."
"ek baat batao tum apne larkon ko school kab bhejogi."
"bada wala to jaane laga hai Bhabhi. Uske papa ne uska naam bhi badal kar Viahal kar diya hai."
"accha kiya hai. Hum sab apne hi tareeke ke insaan hotey hain, issiliye naam bhi apne hi hone chahiye." I could see her sulking at the change of name of her eldest one from kariya RK to Vishal
"Vishal Ka matlab hota hai bada." RK said coming in. she was on her attentive best seeing her.
"you didn't change?"
"didn't feel like." I was done and needed to freshen up so left his with his favorite tea.
...
Madhu entered the room and was taken aback. The room had changed entirely except for the wall paint. It had AC fixed now. The terrace had flowers similar to those in US penthouse. There were awesome paintings on the walls since they were all signed by him it had to be his plus the style was same as the one we used in Trishna's engagement. she actually had come in without him so that she could speak to Bittuji but she got lost. There were brown and purple curtains on the French window and golden lotus stencils where there was no artwork. The one above the bed caught her attention particularly; it was a breath taking piece where Radha was lying alone in a cave, with a peacock in her arms. Radha looked at the peacock with huge set of feathers with such fondness that it would be impossible to explain in words. She was mesmerized and this was not first time when RK's artistic skills had rendered her speechless. RK was an artist with great skill and there was no doubting that. She sighed and felt elated to be the only one who experienced this side of his personality. She went ahead to the dressing table in a huge walk in attached to the room. She wanted to remove her heavy jewelry so she went upto the vanity. She was about to remove her earings when a small note caught her eye.
"If I ask you not to change will you agree?"
The door clicked just then and she knew he was in. Somehow she did not feel all that funny as she used to in turn she felt calm. He came straight away into the walkin and saw her standing infront of the mirror with his slip in her hand. Awkward and nervousness were strangers to RK but today they found place in his heart. For a second he wanted to turn away and leave but then his eyes caught hers looking at him from inside the mirror. It appeared as if she was trapped inside it. That was enough for him to snap out of his stupor he went upto her and entwined his fingers is hers and pulled her our of this claustrophobic room to the main room.
"Thank you" he whispered taking the slip back from her hands and putting it in his pocket.
"For what." She got a reassuring smile in response.
"you painted all these."
"no these are giclees" RK's confidence was back and this did not go un noticed by Madhu. So art was not only his skill but it was his very existence. Like she felt scared devoid of her uniform he felt not at home sans art.
"what are giclees." RK felt those fluttering fingers touching the artwork on the wall right at his heart. He swallowed hard his desire for her was not some burning furnace instead it was a clam and flowing river. Her company worked as a balm soothing the age old creases in his life. Her interest in his being was stemed either by curiosity or by conceen but never by a need to appear good in his eyes.
"High quality prints of paintings"
"there I was unnecessarily giving you so much credit. Why do they have your name then."
"you missed it they are prints of paintings so in crux I did paint the original thing just not this huge." He had closed in on her involuntarily. He might have been engrossed in this discussion but Madhu was acutely aware of his presence and she moved to the wall in front which hoisted that beautiful piece with Radha and the peacock.
"will I ever get to see the originals."
"that one is." He pointed to the piece that had grabbed her attention. Madhu starred at that piece trying to understand what it was trying to depict.
"what are you thinking?" by now RK had got back all his senses and he saw how she was engrossed in that painting. There is some thing very special about it. Radha appeared to be in love with that peacock her eyes half closed and fixed on it. She looked so real.
"There has to be a story behind it?"
"There is"
"That is"
"Once upon a time Radha was called by Krishna in the wee hours of morning to this cave in Goverdhan parvat. She was so engrossed in Krishna at that time that she did not notice Krishna and her mother also coming to the same cavern looking for her. But Krishna noticed it and transformed into a huge peacock with the most beautifull irridiscent feathers ever to save her from humiliation. Radha still recognized him for what he was, she still could see through his faade and was still lost into him. Crux no matter how enchanting Krishna's transformation is she sees through his exterior and reaches his soul every time."
"Why did Krishna transform into a peacock and not some thing else?"
"Because peacock is a symbol of camouflage in philosophical world. Peacock hides its fear in feelings of pride, vanity, and exclusivity, so do we."
Madhu looked back at RK this time. She understood it was his way of expressing his reasons why he behaved the way he did. It was his way of telling her that she understood him beyond all the elaborate and magnificent exterior that he had created. He reached for the remote lying on the bed and drew the heavy curtains of the room to avoid the sunlight that now came shinning in. He came too close to Madhu in his effort to get the remote and she did not flinch. She inhaled in his musky scent and asked
"Why did you ask me not to change."
"Because you look ethereal this way." He touched her cheek ever so lightly, scared that he might mar her alabaster skin.
"Why did you agree to it?" He whispered
"I don't know"
"you don't know or you don't want to accept?" he again asked his thumb tracing his collar bone.
"If you are trying to drive my senses wild then you are achieving it and I must change now" All the courage that had surfaced up for the past few minutes had finally disappeared and she sprinted towards the washroom.
RK got hold of hand right at the nick of time and he pulled her back to himself. "You cannot run away from me."
"Who was running away from you I want to change this for it is quite prickly."
"you have ten minutes."
"It took good 45 minutes for two people to pin this darn thing in place how can I get rid of it in 10 minutes?"
"you are wasting time, anyways I can get rid of it in ten mins"
"In your dreams"
"challenging me or is this your way to get me help you undress. You did not need to play catty with me you just had to ask." He was smiling wickedly as he had succeeded in irritating her.
"I don't need your help." And she tried to stomp away again to be pulled back and this time he fall down on the bed along with her.
They did not care if it was hard for them to breathe or to control their pacing hearts. They did not care if they were a bundle of nerves and did everything wrong. It did not matter to them if their fingers fumbled and their hands trembled. At that moment all that mattered was their togetherness their moment of pure ecstasy and bliss. They had waited for it long enough. For them all that mattered was their love which they had found long back but had accepted recently. All that mattered was their journey on this road to their liberation from their pain and their fears. Their fingers entwined their breathing ragged they embarked on their road to salvation.
Bigg Boss 19
Itti Si Khushi Sab TV
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