Chapter 4

Buaji was indeed ecstatic about the early wedding. She wanted Khushi to get married quickly so that she doesn't change her mind about Arnav! And a low scale wedding would be able to hide the fact that they weren't very well off. Buaji didn't have much left after Khushi's college money. She had a little old age savings for herself. Arnav was a very nice guy and Buaji was 100% sure that Arnav would always keep Khushi happy.

 

'Khushi doesn't understand why I'm doing all this, I know she must be cursing me right now, but later she will thank me. It was not an easy decision for me either. Bhaiya had given me his princess to take care of; I cannot let him down, Even if that includes breaking her heart temporarily. She will be happy with Arnav… she will.' Buaji thought as she wiped the tears from her eyes.

 

 The wedding preparations started the very next day. The pandit was called and the arrangements were taken care of. Amongst all this Khushi felt lonely. She wanted to talk to Shyam but she couldn't. She didn't have the courage to tell him what was going on in her life!

Everything was going wrong.

 

'No one would be as unlucky as I am. I owe Buaji everything, even my life. She has always given me the best and treated me like her daughter. I cannot go against her; I never have and never will. Shyam… he is the man I love but I can't marry him, I can't tell him anything either. I am such a coward. I cannot even go talk to him because I am scared, scared that he will break down in front of me and I will not be able to see that. There will be a huge scene and everything will be over. Buaji's respect in the society, her dignity and also the bond we share. I have to go away. I have to let Shyam think that I ditched him, and that I never loved him. I am sorry jaan. I really am.' Khushi wiped her tears that had smudged her make up and turned her nose apple red.

 

Buaji undertook all the preparations and the wedding date was fixed for the 1^st Of June! It was just 2 days from now and there was so much to do. Arnav wanted it to be a simple temple wedding. He would give an elaborate reception once they were back from London. Arnav got an idea, maybe he could take Khushi to London with him. He had everything set, they could take off the very day after the wedding, it was in the morning after all.

Arnav was very happy with the wedding. He obviously didn't know how Khushi felt.

 

The engagement and other ceremonies were just bunked and only the haldi rasam was done. Arnav's Mama-Mamiji arrived the next day.

 

Arnav went and touched their feet as they entered the house. Khushi too followed behind him and took their blessings. They were very happy to see Khushi! She looked very pretty in the navy blue sari she wore.

Khushi smiled just a little when she received the compliment!

 

"Khushi, I'm so glad you agreed to marry him! Only you can bring some fun into Arnav's boring life!" said his Mamiji.

 

Khushi looked at Arnav.

 

'I am not sure of that! I think it's just impossible to do that! He is just PLAIN boring! Or maybe I'm not interested. he doesn't talk much, he is just so simple! I doubt he is the owner of a multinational company! How does he run that place?' she thought. She knew it was rude to think like that but she did anyway. 'And why did he agree to marry me? Our status was not even close to theirs! He was a millionaire! He owned a huge business. How could he be so weird!' Khushi thought.

 

 

She still looked at them and smiled.

 

"I think she is perfect for our Arnav! He is a very lucky man!" Said his Mama insensitively.

Arnav smiled widely looking at Khushi.

"I am very lucky." Arnav said.

'You have NO idea!' Khushi thought. She felt bad for Arnav also. He was being truthful in this marriage and she… Sigh!

Buaji was very happy since Khushi's qualities were being praised and appreciated!

Khushi agreed to one thing they said. Buaji had brought her up VERY well! And that no one would do so much for one's niece! Buaji smiled slowly.

"I have always thought of Khushi as my own daughter! And she has even been my best friend and always understood my condition!" Buaji replied.

 

The relatives rested for sometime and then they all had dinner together! Everyone was talking and Khushi was just staring at the watch. Shyam hadn't called today! Was everything ok? Was he fine? But she was happy that only tomorrow! And then she would not have to face Shyam. See pain in his eyes. She knew he would feel betrayed. He loved her so much and so did she, but I guess they were destined to be separated. Life had something more wonderful planned for each of them.

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The next day was a very long day. Early morning the haldi ceremony took place, where Arnav was put haldi first and then Khushi. Both were asked to get ready and leave for the temple. The marriage was going to take place in the morning! Khushi wore a red heavy sari, which was her mother's and Arnav wore a suit! They had to leave in the evening so thats why he was already ready!

 

The mandir was empty, only the pandit was there and he had everything ready. Arnav was asked to put on the sehra!

Finally they started the ceremony. First the pandit chanted the prayers and both sat quietly listening and trying to understand what he was saying! Then Arnav put his hand forward and Buaji slowly placed Khushi's hand on his. She shut her eyes and let a tear pass through! She still couldn't believe all this was happening, everything was happening so fast. Khushi didn't like Arnav's touch, she felt awkward!

 

Khushi and Arnav slowly got up and Buaji did the gathbandhan and kanyadaan. It was time for the saath pheras. Khushi started off first and Arnav behind her. She completed the first two pheras successfully, chanting what the pandit asked her to say. She knew she would be a pathetic wife and that Arnav would one day regret marrying her. She knew she wouldn't be able to live without Shyam and that she would die soon! And in the third pheras her legs got numb and refused to move. Her eyes widened and she looked straight ahead. She saw SHYAM! He was walking towards the marriage place. Her hands were shaking and her feet were trembling. Shyam had his smile on his face and he looked at them and smiled. he came closer and sat down to look at the wedding. That's when Khushi realized that the ghunghat covered her face. Shyam didn't know it was her! He smiled looking at the wedding. Khushi interpreted it as 'maybe he is imagining himself getting married to me. But that will not be possible.' she thanked god that she saw Shyam for the last time and moved on with the pheras. Then Arnav went ahead and chanted his woes. Everything went on well. Arnav put sindoor in Khushi's maang and made her wear the mangalsutra! They took Buaji, mama, and mami's blessing and started to head out. Everything was done. Khushi's destiny had just been decided, once and for all.

 

Shyam stood up and walked towards them. Buaji became nervous but she decided to stay quiet.

 

"Congratulations, young man!" Shyam said in a polite way.

"Thank you." replied Arnav.

"Hope you'll live happily ever after! You don't look like you are from Kolkata?"

"Thank you! And I am from Mumbai," Arnav said again.

Khushi looked up at Shyam. He was genuinely happy. Didn't he see Buaji? Didn't he understand that it was Khushi? A part of her wanted him to know and a part of her just wanted to run away knowing that this would haunt her all her life.

 

Shyam excused himself and went forward to talk to the panditji. Khushi and Arnav moved on.

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Buaji helped Khushi change into a salwar suit as the journey would take 8 long hours and Khushi had never travelled in a flight before. When Khushi was told about the flight journey she didn't react. It was her dream to go on a flight and now it just didn't even matter.

 

She packed her belongings slowly and came out. She hugged Buaji and began to cry. She would miss Buaji and even Buaji had tears in her eyes.

 

"Khushi don't cry! I'm sure you'll enjoy in London and I'll be there at the airport to receive you both in Mumbai! I promise."

 

Khushi wiped her tears and looked around for the last time. She knew she might not come back to this house ever again! Shyam was here. She couldn't possibly come back to Calcutta. Khushi bid Buaji goodbye and told her NOT to tell Shyam where she was. Buaji agreed!

As she was going towards the airport all the wonderful things about Calcutta flashed before her eyes. She couldn't believe she was leaving now, once and for all.

Arnav realized how upset Khushi was but decided to let it be as this happened with every girl. He empathized with her but felt as though he should give her a little space.

 

At the airport the couple was separated from Mamaji and Mamiji and were taken to a different flight.

 

This flight had around 10-15 seats and there was a special arrangement for them only. There were no other people. It was then that she realized how rich Arnav actually was. This was a chartered aircraft! Arnav put on his sunglasses and went into the cockpit. He asked Khushi to join in. She got up and followed him. Arnav spoke to the pilot about the duration and the weather factors while Khushi appreciated the scene. She had always wished to see the cockpit. She even wanted to sit there while the pilot flew the giant machine. She wanted a lot of other things too but she couldn't have it all could she?

 

 The airhostess kept their luggage at the back and offered them fresh juice. Khushi took one because she was nervous. She had never travelled in a flight before. Arnav was sitting next to her but she didn't feel safe.

 

Arnav helped Khushi fasten her seat belts and the flight began to take off. Khushi clutched on to Arnav's hand as she shut her eyes and with the other hand clutched her dupatta. Arnav looked at Khushi with a slow smile. She looked so innocent! "Beautiful" he muttered

and Khushi opened her eyes. He removed his gaze and looked out of the window.

"I mean look out! Calcutta is so beautiful!" Arnav covered up.

 

Khushi wasn't feeling too well but she still looked out to see what was visible of her dear city. Calcutta looked so heavenly, full of greenery and tall Buildings. She could see the Hooghly river too. Arnav was just liking the fact that Khushi was close to him. Khushi was very excited and looked at Arnav. She then realized how close she had got to him. Her face was just an inch away from him so she returned to her normal position. Why had she gone so close? She scolded herself. It's not right. She felt as though she was cheating on Shyam, well, technically she was but this was way past just cheating, this was betraying him.

 

Khushi looked around the flight feeling uneasy. "Do you want to go sit near the pilot now?" Arnav asked.

"Umm. No, it's ok."

"Why? Please come. It will be fun!" Arnav got up and caught her hand. Khushi couldn't say anything. He was her husband now. He had full right on her. She went slowly into the cabin.

* Oh My God! * was her reaction. There was a huge glass window and you could see the clouds and the sky. There were about a million buttons and controls. The two pilots looked at them and greeted them. Khushi smiled back and greeted them. It looked just so awesome! WOW! The whole view and everything! Khushi was just smiling away looking around. Arnav was happy seeing her smile. It was the first time he had seen her smile with all her heart. He realized that when she smiled she had a small spark in her eyes and she could almost be jumping in joy now! Khushi was a lively person, so for sometime she had forgotten all her worries and smiled but everything came back to her the moment she looked at Arnav. They both had stared into each other's eyes and Khushi's smile faded away. She could just think about Shyam.

 

They returned to their seats and the airhostess served them food. Arnav ate properly while Khushi just stared at her food.

 

"Why aren't you eating?" Arnav asked.

"Umm, actually…"

"You didn't like the food?"

"No, no. It's just that I am not that hungry!"

"Please eat something or you will fall ill." He said.

 

They slept for sometime in the flight. Unknowingly Arnav's head rested on her shoulders and Khushi woke up. She looked at his head and tried to straighten it but it fell back on her. This time his hands were on her lap. She didn't move. she just sat still staring all around. The airhostess blushed as she passed. Khushi tried to smile but couldn't even force a smile. She was irritated. 'Why couldn't he sleep on his side?' she thought.

 

Once the landing was announced Arnav got up and straightened himself. He was shy and looked down. He just realized he had slept on Khushi's shoulder for 4 hours.

 

They reached the airport and Khushi checked her make up and dress. Arnav too put on his coat and went out. The helpers came in and carried their luggage out for them and they went to the airport. London airport was huge and there were many people around. Khushi felt slightly more comfortable as there were people around. Many people stared at her as she wore a salwar…

Khushi looked around and praised the place in her mind. A Limo was waiting outside for them. Khushi had never seen one in her life! It was very cool inside, there were some snacks kept in front for them and Arnav munched some wafers. Khushi too took some wafers because by now she was very hungry! She hadn't eaten anything since before the wedding but now she couldn't control. She had to move on now but she couldn't get herself to come to terms with it. She knew, however, that some day she would have to accept Arnav and their relationship and move ahead, just right now didn't seem that time!

 

They reached a bungalow and the car stopped. Arnav and Khushi got out. It was white in colour and everything was very simple but elegant! There was a flight of steps in one corner and the whole flooring was of wood. There were two couches, white in colour, and the walls were creamish-orange. it went well with the flooring and the couch. There was a huge TV in the middle and a lawn outside.

"If you want you can go around and see the house. We have to stay here for three days. This is my house, I bought it 2 years ago as I come here very often." Arnav merely stated.

 

The bungalow had 2 rooms, a kitchen, a dining room and obviously a living room. It had a bar on the 1^st floor and a balcony. It wasn't anything lavish; it was just very nice and simple. A place where a person could relax after work!

 

"Yeah, I will go see the house, can I freshen up before that?" Khushi said rather asked.

"You don't need to ask me Khushi. Our room is the first one on your left!" He replied.

The word 'Our' made Khushi squirm inside. She didn't want to SHARE a BED with Arnav! But how. how should she tell him? He was her husband.

 

Khushi went to the room and to the bathroom. She washed her face as tears formed in her eyes. She looked at herself in the mirror. Now she was Mrs. Arnav Singh Raizada. She had some rules to follow. She had to be a good wife and she couldn't let her husband down. She was married now and she had to be a good wife, rather try to be a good wife!  Her life was different now. She had to change herself. Crying for Shyam wouldn't help now! She came out after wiping her tears and face.

 

"Would you like to cook tonight? Or should I ask th—

"No I will cook!" Khushi said cutting in, "What would you like to have?"

"Anything, If your cooking I'm sure I will like it" Arnav said in a sweet voice.

"I'm sure you must be tired. Rest for sometime and then prepare dinner!"

"Won't you rest?"

"No, I have pending work. I will finish that first. Work comes first!" Arnav said walking out of the room.

 

'Obviously, what else would a workaholic say?' she thought. But then she tried to understand him better. He hadn't opened up to her too much. They still behaved like strangers. They were so formal and everything was so awkward. She knew this had all happened too fast. She was the one who had agreed to it. Arnav had been a gentleman all along, it was she who couldn't come to par with him.

 

'Did we rush the wedding? Did I judge Khushi too soon? Does she need time to understand me?' these thoughts circled round Arnav's mind.

 

At Night after a quiet dinner Khushi went and changed into her nightgown and Arnav was lying down in bed. Khushi came out of the bathroom and put her clothes properly in the cupboard, put her jewellery away and then slowly inched towards the bed. The room was very quiet and no one spoke. Khushi's stomach twisted and she couldn't speak. She was feeling very awkward. It was as if she was sleeping with a stranger! But again, she couldn't revolt, today was supposed to be her first night. She slowly went and laid down beside Arnav, trying to erase Shyam's shocked face out of her brain.

 

Both of them stared at the ceiling.

 

"Should I switch off the lights?" Arnav asked softly.

 

Khushi nodded. Arnav did that. Khushi was scared of new places. She had barely been to such places. Arnav even felt awkward sleeping with another person on the same bed. The AC was full on but Khushi was still sweating. She kept changing her side and so was Arnav. He was attracted to Khushi. He was trying to control himself. He didn't know whether he should take the first step or…

 

He slowly touched her hand. Khushi shut her eyes. She almost froze. She didn't know what to do. His other hand came to her other one and he turned over closer to her. Khushi became numb. Arnav tried to take it slowly and not to startle her. This was very awkward for him. She didn't know how to react. Should she refuse? Should she protest? But it was too late. She could feel his hands moving upwards and he inched closer to her. His breath could be felt against her face. She turned her head to the other side, not wanting him to touch her at all. She tried to calm herself down but her heart was beating faster. Everything was turning out of control. Arnav's hold wasn't very tight. If Khushi wanted she could push him away but she was scared. She didn't know how he would react and he had the right to touch her. They were married! What would she tell him even if she stopped him?

'If he comes to know about Shyam then he will leave me and Buaji will be embarrassed!' Khushi's thoughts ran. She felt very helpless as Arnav inched closer. She felt his legs entwine with hers and his body against hers. His touch made her body weak. It was very intense and she couldn't breathe. Arnav kissed her neck softly and she held her breath again. He kissed her neck again moving a little upwards. Her hands were clenched into a fist. He kissed her ears. His hand cupped her face and turned it towards him. She tried to do something but he kissed her cheeks and dragged his lips down her neck again. Khushi gasped. She was sweating a lot and his touch made her more uncomfortable. He inched towards her lips when she spoke finally.

 

"Arnav… please." she said in a thin, husky, soft voice. Arnav immediately withdrew and took his hands back. Khushi felt even guiltier. She blamed herself for ruining Arnav's life.

"I'm sorry. actu— Khushi tried to say.

"No, no. It's ok. You don't need to be sorry. I think we should wait. We barely know each other and all this happened too fast. right? I should have just waited. I was just… I am sorry."

 

"I just need some time." Khushi said, sighing, thankful that he didn't force her. But she was saying what she felt. Arnav was a very nice man. He talked with courtesy and never asked her to do something she didn't want to.

They both slept on two ends of the bed and didn't realize when they fell asleep.

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