Chapter 3: Unease

Chapter 3: Unease

This feeling of guilt is your conscience calling your attention to the higher road, and your heart wishing you had taken it.

Richelle E

"Good morning Geet"  a voice greeted brightly before pulling her chair and sitting in her cubicle. 

"Good morning Neha, how are you feeling today?"

"Oh much better, I slept like  a baby after ages." Neha was geet's colleague, cubicle neighbour, one among her few friends she was comfortable with.
 Neha also had a one year old baby who just wont sleep at night. Sometimes she pulled an all nighter and showed up at work looking like a zombie. 

"Earth to Miss Geet.. you didn't listen to my gibberish today....what is up? look tense even."

"Parents had a guy come over two days back" Geet said slumping slightly on her desk

"Again? so soon?" she asked swirling her chair to face her...Geet nodded

"Honey what exactly is the matter? didn't work out again?"

"No"

"Generally you are happy about things not working out,  you seem more disturbed by this process than being keen about it." Neha  winked "What is it this time huh?"

"Neha, you know how I feel about relationships in general"

"Is this because of your ex? look I don't know what happened but trust me I have been there, I have lost love several times before finding my husband" she tried to reassure....

No Neha you haven't been through it, Geet smiled sadly

"what do you feel sad about?" Neha continued while switching on her computer. 

"I don't know" Geet said miserably

"You do know, think on it but don't stress...Gosh stop tapping your feet, it will be alright...

 Oh my god look at all these email's, I take two days leave and this is what I come back to. I am telling you Geet they aren't paying us enough" she muttered engrossed in her the screen.

Office was the only place where she could act efficiently, it distracted her from all the dark thoughts. Today however the distraction wasn't enough to stop the continuous nagging in the back of her mind. So much that she couldn't focus well. 

By afternoon she had had enough of it.. unable to avoid the guilt she spoke to Neha again.

"Neha" Geet called 

"My my Geet you sure are speaking a lot today, I like it...you need help in that matrix project?"

"No I think I feel guilty because I was rude"

"You were rude to the client?" Neha as puzzled

"No, to that guy"

"Whom?...." I took her few seconds to recall "Ohh...the one with rishta, you barely speak Geet, what makes you think you were rude?"

"I was rude" Geet said with surety

"Okay....did he give you a reason for behaving out of character? "

Geet shook her head looking at the floor in more guilt.

"was he rude in return?" Neha asked...trying to understand the situation that was making this silent girl so uneasy.

"No he was quiet and then he left" Geet said in a small voice

"Geet honey, do you want to be with that guy?"

"NO" her answer left no room for questions.

"Then either you let it go or just apologize once. Stop sweating on it, its alright" Neha said in a stern tone.

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Maan  stifled a yawn as the meeting went on in the dark room illuminated only by the light from the projector. They were repeating the same things, the actual meeting was over some thirty minutes ago. He glanced at his teammates and they were equally bored.   

Once again his thoughts started wandering to certain brown troubled eyes. Try as much as he may, he couldn't keep her thoughts away. No he wasn't someone who liked to romanticize things and claim it to be love at first sight. He wasn't pitying her either. He thought on it, often the answer lays ahead of you, every feeling has a name and once you sit with yourself and try to evaluate what you are feeling. Life is much more bearable.

And after a whole lot of wondering he realized it was simple. He was intrigued and certainly not by her story but how she was despite of that. He had to stop that thought. Being intrigued wasn't good.

Geet had been clear about not going ahead. His family had asked for his views on the proposal. Maan asked them to wait, he was still thinking how to say no without hurting her parents and that too without them knowing that its Geet's decision too. That day after leaving her room, he went back to a very seriously talking group of adults. Her parents must have spoken about the incident. 

They all saw him alone and seemed worried. Maan sat and spoke to them about how beautiful her paintings were, her parents were very surprised that Geet not only allowed him in her room but also allowed him to look at her paintings. They didn't say this but it was clear....and they looked hopeful. He couldn't bring himself to break their hearts at that moment. It was inevitable but he decided on later. 

He glanced at his watch and cursed inwardly, trust corporate culture to always extend the working hours. 

His mom mostly stayed at their house in village, she preferred it over the life in Mumbai. This happened to be one of those weeks she was staying with him that is why the search for a bride.

He returned home late and extremely tired courtesy to mind numbing Mumbai traffic. His mom slept early so he quietly entered his apartment.

After having a hot shower, he decided to skip dinner and placed the food in the refrigerator. Maan came to his room and flopped on the bed. The events of the day flashing in front of his eyes. Maan's eyes were about to shut when his phone beeped. His vision blurred again as another beep disturbed him. He groaned. 

His hands fumbled around the bed in the dark until he felt the familiar feel of metal. 

His eyes blinked unable to adjust to the light, he read the message... it said

Hi,

I wanted to apologize for my behaviour the other day in my house. I shouldn't have said many things. I am sorry.

His eyes widened at the second message, his mind blank then very slowly Maan's lip broke into a huge sleepy smile.

- Geet.  

P.S- I hope you liked the chapter. Do hit the like button and comment to let me know what to think about the chapter

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