Birds of a Feather Completed G

Chapter 39: Riant

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The content of this story belongs strictly to the author, -Archi-. Any unwarranted use/copy of it is not encouraged and is strictly prohibited.

Chapter Thirty-Nine

Riant

Khushi took a deep breath as she entered Abhaya Hospital, steeling herself for what would be another long day. She had received the latest reports of Adya’s case earlier that morning. Needless to say, they didn’t look too good. Not only was there no change in brain activity, but Adya’s heart was also slowing down. The Vigs would have to make a decision about keeping their daughter on life support sooner than later.

And Khushi was already dreading watching the family struggle with that choice.

To her great relief, however, the Vigs were in a much better shape than yesterday when Khushi stopped by for a routine check-up. Although all three of them looked hollow, dejected and sleep-deprived, they did not badger her like yesterday. In fact, none of them even spoke as Khushi updated the charts and adjusted the medications.

Wondering how they were faring, Khushi was just about to speak to Abhira when she received an urgent pager from Dr. Awasti. Excusing herself, she sped off to her senior’s office without another thought.

A beckoning by her mentor usually meant something was serious.

Surprisingly, Dr. Awasti’s usually strict voice was quite polite when Khushi arrived. “Come sit,” she said, closing the file she was pouring over.

Khushi obeyed, wondering if this was a ‘social’ call.

“How is the meningitis case going on?” she asked, surveying her closely.

“Not too good,” Khushi answered. “The patient’s vitals are erratic, but on average, are slowing down. I have adjusted the medications for now, but she has to be monitored continuously until…”

Khushi couldn’t finish as Abhira’s haunting face came into focus.

“Until the parents decide on signing a DNR,” Dr. Awasti finished.

Khushi nodded. DNR or “do not resuscitate” was the legal order that allowed Adya to pass away without any medical intervention. It was the agreement her father had refused to sign for her mother.

“Are you okay?”

Khushi was caught off guard. “Of course, why–”

“I had assigned my best resident doctor this case in the hopes that she would have everything sorted by now… instead, I find her not being able to complete her sentences.”

Khushi didn’t know what astonished her more. Dr. Awasti asking her about her “feelings” or Dr. Awasti saying very casually that she was her best resident doctor. Her mentor wasn’t known for giving out compliments.

“Please don’t misunderstand me,” Dr. Awasti continued. “But I was expecting to find you here yesterday evening, monitoring Adya’s vitals, not Dr. Durga… to be very honest, I have never seen you leave your shift on time, especially when handed an urgent case like this one.”

“I’m sorry, I just–”

Dr. Awasti intervened. “No, no… don’t apologize. You are not supposed to be working overtime, and I will never encourage you for that either. Your days as an intern are long past. I’m just saying that it’s not like you to leave and I want to make sure it’s not something serious.”

Khushi was touched, as she realized why she had been summoned so early in the day. Dr. Awasti was worried. Perhaps her tough exterior and no-nonsense attitude were all because of years in a field where one had no choice but to be emotionless. But underneath all that, it seemed she was still a human who cared deeply about her students.

“Dr. Gupta?”

Khushi blinked. “Err, I’m not sure what to tell you… I may have left abruptly yesterday, but trust me, I am on top of this case–”

“I know. What I want you to tell me is why this case is so different from all the ones you have treated so far?”

Khushi gulped, deciding to stick to the truth. “My mother accidently fell down the stairs almost two years ago and has been on life support ever since… my father refuses to sign a DNR, because he hopes that she will wake up one day.”

Understanding dawned to Dr. Awasti as sympathy flooded her eyes. “I didn’t know… I’m sorry for your loss.”

Khushi tried to smile. “It’s fine… I’ve… I’ve dealt with it. Well, sort of. What bothered me yesterday, actually, was Adya’s sister asking me why Adya was technically still breathing if she is… you know, gone. And I-I didn’t have an answer.”

Dr. Awasti pursued her lips.

“It kind of brought back everything my father has been saying all these months about my mother’s case, and I… I didn’t know what to believe anymore.”

Dr. Awasti was silent, making Khushi vaguely wonder how stupid she must’ve sounded. She was a trained professional for crying out loud, why was she taking a fourteen-year old’s words so seriously?

“My husband asked me that once,” Dr. Awasti finally said with a sigh. “His father passed away when he was young, so he kind of stopped believing in modern medicine. He says, in the end, what is destined to happen will happen… we doctors end up kidding ourselves that we can save lives, when really we are just pawns in the hands of fate.”

Khushi couldn’t believe what she was hearing.

“And when you see cases like this,” Dr. Awasti continued. “You can’t help but believe him.”

“What do you believe?”

“I do believe in fate,” Dr. Awasti answered truthfully. “Because I remember every patient of mine who I couldn’t save, and it wasn’t because I didn’t try hard enough. Sometimes, the day is just not in our favor… but I also believe that if I don’t work as hard as I do, then many of my patients won’t survive.”

Khushi was confused.

“What I mean to say is yes, there are many things outside of our understanding. We need to respect that. But there are also many things that are within our understanding, so believe in it and do not second guess yourself. You are a capable doctor, do whatever you must to make sure your personal life doesn’t change that. Dr. Khushi Gupta and Khushi Gupta cannot be the same person.”

And she finally understood.

Whatever Khushi’s beliefs and questions may be, none of them should ever interfere with her duty. She had been trained to not waver in moments of stifling pain, panic or pressure. People counted on her to keep a leveled head at all times, and that’s what she must deliver. Simply put, there was no place for doubt in the hospital.

“How about you take the day off?” Dr. Awasti suggested unexpectedly. “Maybe spend time with your family and… sort yourself out. Every doctor deserves a break once in a while.”

Khushi shook her head. “I’m fine, thank you. Adya’s case is delicate and it’s probably best if I continue… the Vigs are quite upset with us already.”

The senior doctor smiled – a rarity for her. “Someone is always upset with us… but I won’t put anything before the health of my staff.”

“Really, I’m fine. I want to keep working – if that’s okay?”

Dr. Awasti sighed, shrugging to herself in a way that said, ‘at least I tried’. “Okay then, if you insist.”

Khushi smiled, happy. “Also, I wanted to talk to you about Dr. Sood–”

Dr. Awasti waved off her concern. “He is on probation and a full inquiry is being launched… putting an intern in charge in the middle of the night was crossing the line. It doesn’t matter who he knows on the hospital board, but he won’t step foot here again once I’m done with him.”

Khushi was relieved. “The interns will be very happy to hear that. So, should I get going then? Or is there something else we need to discuss?”

“Just one more thing actually – I’m sending you on the Nainital trip.”

“The medical camp?”

“Yes, Dr. Mangat will be going on maternity leave, so I’m sending you as a replacement. You will get an email by the end of the day with all of the details.”

Khushi nodded and stood up to leave. “Thank you Dr. Awasti… your advice means a lot.”

She smiled kindly in response. “Just make sure you take time off once in a while Khushi. As much as this hospital is important, it’s not worth getting lost in… Keep me posted about Adya’s case.”

It was a dismissal.

So, bidding her goodbye, Khushi resumed her shift in much higher spirits.

Fortunately, the rest of the day didn’t hold many difficulties. Adya’s fluctuating vitals eventually stabilized by evening, allowing Khushi and Durga to retire home, both relieved that the dreaded DNR order need not be discussed until tomorrow.

By the time Khushi entered, the penthouse was flooded with dying embers of vermilion colored light as the sun disappeared behind the horizon.

“Arnav?” she called, wondering if he was once again working late.

Much to her delight, he wasn’t.

“In here!” came his muffled voice in answer.

Dropping her handbag and white coat on the couch, Khushi crept to the kitchen to find Arnav bustling away, amidst preparations for dinner.

“Welcome home,” he said jubilantly. With an apron thrown over his track pants and a toque to match, he looked nothing less than a professional chef.

Khushi giggled at her own naivety.

“Something funny?” he asked.

“Nothing… I was just thinking how you looked like a professional chef, when I realized that you actually are a professional chef.”

“Very good Dr. Genius, glad to know you are paying attention.”

Khushi rolled her eyes and sat down on a stool at the kitchen island. “Cut me some slack, okay? It’s like you’re a whole new person now…”

He shrugged. “Or I’m the same person, just in different clothes.”

“If you say so… so what’s special today? You seem very happy.”

Arnav beamed. “I am very happy… we closed a deal this afternoon. You know that mall they announced a couple of days ago?”

Khushi shook her head in negative. Keeping up with the news was not her forte.

He sighed, disappointed. “Okay, well there’s going to be a new mall in the city… and yours truly will be the one building it.”

Her eyes widened in surprise. “That’s a big contract!”

Arnav took a bow. “Why, thank you. It is a big contract and that’s why I decide to celebrate.”

Khushi clapped her hands in applause. “Very impressive! How happy is your Dad?”

“Papa is ecstatic. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, it’s not a big contract money wise… but the fact that someone completely new wants to do business with us means that we are still worth something on the market.”

“Of course you’re worth something on the market, you underestimate yourself too much.”

Arnav ignored that. “So how was your day?”

Khushi twiddled her thumbs. “Better than yesterday… I’m going to Nainital next week.”

“How come?”

“Medical camp… one of the doctors is going on maternity leave, so I will be replacing her.”

“Are you excited?”

“I guess. This will be my first camp, so I’m quite clueless about what to expect.”

Arnav smiled reassuringly. “I’m sure it’ll be fun. Why don’t you get changed? I’m just finishing up here.”

Khushi hopped down from the stool in answer and disappeared into the bedroom. A hot shower later, she was once again standing in the kitchen, watching Arnav load the dishwasher. He was quite meticulous in that sense; everything in the kitchen had to be in its place. It was a big wonder how he ever let Lata take over the reins once upon a time.

Clearing her throat, Khushi asked, “What’s on the menu today?”

He straightened up. “Hakka… it’s been a while since I’ve had it.”

Khushi frowned. “But you could’ve just ordered it from down the street.”

“Let me rephrase, it’s been a while since I’ve had good hakka.”

“Overconfidence is not a good thing Chef Riant.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Chef Riant?”

“You call me Dr. Genius.”

“Did you search the dictionary for that?”

Khushi narrowed her eyes, unimpressed. “I do know English.”

“So do most people… but what’s with words like ‘riant’?”

“It means happy and cheerful, which is basically what you are most days you’re cooking.”

“That still doesn’t explain how you even know this word exists.”

“Are you kidding me? I had an English tutor.”

He snorted. “Oh that’s right, I forgot you Guptas had to speak like British royalty – my bad.”

If Khushi had paid a little more attention, she would have caught his sarcasm. But alas, she didn’t. So, shrugging her shoulders, she said in complete honesty, “It’s alright, me and Vihaan hated it; we tried our best to keep it a secret.”

Arnav stared at her, half bewildered and half amused. “You actually had a tutor to perfect your English?”

She nodded, wondering why that was so shocking. “It was a part of the whole Gupta parade… By age ten, I had the dictionary memorized. My tutor was very strict.”

Arnav’s eyes, wide in disbelief until now, settled in understanding. “That explains a lot actually.”

“Like what?”

“Like why you’re such a nerd for starters. If you spent your childhood memorizing a dictionary, I don’t even want to know what you did during high school.”

Khushi crossed her arms, slightly irritated. This was exactly why she hated talking about herself. Everyone made her feel abnormal, as though she was an alien from mars. Sure, she had an unconventional father with insane rules, but she turned out alright, didn’t she? There weren’t horns sticking out of her.

“And what was your high school like?” she retorted spitefully. “Booze and bimbos?”

“Ouch.”

She was unapologetic.

“If you must know,” he explained. “I went to a boarding school… they were pretty strict too. There was no dictionary memorizing involved of course, but they took exams and studying very seriously.”

“So then you have nobody to blame for your lack of English knowledge but yourself. Riant is a word.”

Arnav sighed. “Okay fine, you win. Now can you please grab a plate? I’m hungry.”

Khushi grinned, triumphant. “Should I set up the table?”

“Why don’t we eat on the balcony today?”

That was a first.

Khushi instinctively glanced at the windows to find a tranquil night waiting for them outside. The sun had vanished completely to reveal a blanket of twinkling stars while a cool breeze played silently along. It was beautiful and not to mention, perfect.

“You are full of surprises today,” she murmured, retrieving a plate form the cupboard.

He grinned and proceeded to uncover the dishes he had cooked.

“So, here’s presenting,” he said with added flair. “Schezwan fried rice made extra spicy for this fine evening, sesame chicken with– what’s wrong?”

Khushi’s smile, which had been excited until then, faltered slightly. Of course, it hadn’t gone unnoticed by Arnav.

“Erm…” she said hesitantly. “I don’t eat meat.”

Arnav’s mouth was agape.

“Sorry,” she muttered quickly, feeling quite bad that he made so much effort for nothing. “But I will eat the rice, no problem–”

“Since when do you not eat meat?!” he asked indignantly.

“Since I was a kid… I thought you knew that.”

He continued to stare at her in total disbelief. “But… Lata used to cook meat too… you were fine eating that–”

“Actually no, Lata always made sure there was something vegetarian for me.”

Arnav appeared as though he had been punched in the gut. After two full minutes had passed, he finally looked away, disappointed.

“I’m so stupid,” he muttered, more to himself than her. “I should have known. I always just assumed you ate meat, I never bothered to pay attention…”

An awkward silence settled between them at that point. It wasn’t a shocking admission to be honest. Khushi had always known he assumed many things about her, and she let them slide because she enjoyed keeping her life private. Less eyes meant less judgements.

However, to Arnav, this revelation seemed to be quite earth shattering; as though everything he had thought about her was somehow wrongly and grossly miscalculated.

“It’s okay,” she said finally. She hated making him feel like that. “Really… I will eat the rice, not a problem.”

Arnav nodded slowly. “I’m very sorry Khushi.”

“Don’t be! What’s that?” she asked, pointing to an unopened platter.

“Oh, I made honey chili potatoes,” he explained. “As an appetizer.”

“So what are you sulking about then? I have enough to eat.”

And without waiting for his answer, she served herself some food and walked off to the balcony, making herself comfortable on a plush garden sofa, arranged attractively in between an assortment of house plants. Khushi knew it was her mother-in-law’s taste. Satya’s adoration for gardening and interior decorating was an open secret in the family.

Arnav eventually followed her out into the balcony, holding his own plate of dinner and settling down beside her, leaving enough space between them for an invisible third person.

“Ready for the verdict?” Khushi teased, taking her first bite.

Arnav simply watched her, perhaps wanting the results firsthand.

There was no room for comparison. Khushi was blown away the minute the food touched her lips. The chili and garlic flavors were blended together so perfectly that they danced off her tongue in flawless harmony before melting in her mouth.

All she could manage to say was, “Wow.”

A knowing smile spread across Arnav’s soft lips. “Like it?”

“You are definitely allowed to be overconfident,” she mumbled, wolfing down the rest of the rice. “This is amazing!”

He laughed.

“You have also effectively ruined take out for me,” she added as an afterthought.

“Careful now,” Arnav replied with mock disapproval. “The restaurant down the street might be heartbroken to hear that.”

“I’m sure they’ll live.”

He dug into his own plate. “So other than meat,” he asked slowly. “Do you have any other dietary restrictions I should know about?”

Although his tone was casual, Khushi could tell he was far from it. “Are you still upset about not knowing of my vegetarianism?”

He dodged that question. “Is that a no? Are you sure you aren’t allergic to something? Peanuts? Lactose?”

“Nope. It’s just the meat.”

Arnav breathed in relief. “Thank the lord.”

“Why? Did you make something else?”

“I made dessert… I would be devastated if you couldn’t have it.”

“What is it?”

Arnav smirked in answer. “Not so fast… finish your dinner first.”

Khushi was now extremely curious. What was so mysterious about dessert that he couldn’t tell her right then and there? She couldn’t come up with an answer no matter how hard she racked her brains. At last, after what felt like eternity, Arnav finally stood up.

“Wait here,” he said, collecting her now empty plate along with his and disappearing inside. Two minutes later, he was back, holding two bowls. Khushi eagerly accepted hers, only to find–

“Ice cream?” she asked, confused. “This was the big reveal?”

Arnav was a little exasperated. “Take a bite and tell me.”

Khushi did as told and to her astonishment, it wasn’t ice cream at all. It was kulfi. And it was no ordinary kulfi either… no, it tasted exactly like the one she used to have as a wayward teenager, bought from a little roadside stall across from her high school.

“So?” he asked, a little nervously.

She stared at him bewilderment. “How did you know this was my favorite?!”

He let out a sigh of relief. “Does it taste like the one you used to have after school?”

Khushi couldn’t believe it. “How?!” she repeated, staring at the scoop of kulfi sitting innocently in her bowl.

“I asked Vihaan,” Arnav said. “You were so upset yesterday… and I wanted to cheer you up, so I called Vihaan and he told me that you love the kulfi from this particular store near your old high school.”

“You went to that little stall… for me?”

Arnav grinned sheepishly. “Well, that stall is gone… I asked around and luckily someone knew someone who knew the guy who used to own it. I called him and–”

Khushi stood up, unable to hear the rest. She walked to edge of the balcony and looked down at the almost deserted streets, numb to the emotions running rampant through her.

“What’s wrong?” came Arnav’s voice from behind her. “Does it not taste the same?”

She shook her head. “No, no… It tastes the same.”

He inched closer to her, hesitant. “Then what’s wrong?”

“I… I just…” she croaked, unable to find words.

Arnav now stood beside her, waiting patiently for her to get it together.

Khushi stubbornly kept her eyes downcast, before taking a deep breath and answering:

“My mother was the one who took me to that stall the very first time… I was upset about not getting into some stupid club at school one day, so to cheer me up, she bought me kulfi from there. I loved it so much that ever since then, it became our thing. We would go there every time something happened… happy or sad, this kulfi made everything better… so… so I can’t believe you… you got me this… when I was missing her so much.”

Arnav’s warm hand slid on top of hers. “You’re missing your mother?”

Khushi bit her lip. “I’m being silly… I know… it’s been two years already.”

He gently turned her around, so that she was facing him. “Tell me from the beginning.”

“There’s not much to tell. I’m got a new case yesterday at the hospital… a nine-year old girl is on life support and the family has to make a decision about pulling the plug. But when I was talking to the girl’s sister… she said that it’s not fair to take away someone’s right to die.”

“That’s an odd thing to say.”

“Is it really though,” Khushi countered in a small voice. “I mean we don’t really know why some people just go into this limbo state between life and death… but what if it’s because the person doesn’t want to leave? What if they are holding on for a reason?”

Realization struck to Arnav as he quickly connected the dots. “You think your mother will wake up?”

Khushi shuffled her feet, not daring to meet his eyes. She still remembered very distinctly how coldly she had snubbed him the first time he found out about her mother and tried to give her hope.

Yes, it’s impossible! You people act as though the body works on magic, that if you have some extra blessings to spare, you will miraculously heal from anything. But it doesn’t work like that. There is no brain activity in my mother, she is brain dead. I looked at the MRI scans myself, she is gone.

She probably appeared like the world’s biggest hypocrite.

Arnav’s index finger slipped beneath her chin, nudging her to meet his eyes.

“There is no rule anywhere that you can’t second guess yourself,” he said gently.

Khushi snorted. “Dr. Awasti said there is no room to second guess myself.”

“I’m sure she must’ve said something else too.”

How did he know so much about her?

“She did,” Khushi admitted sheepishly. “She said I should keep my job and life separate.”

“I always knew Awasti was sensible.”

“But my life is the hospital.”

“That’s unhealthy Khushi, you must know that,” he said with a disapproving frown. “Maybe you should take a few days off and go spend time with Vihaan… or even your mother?”

Khushi violently disagreed. “No way, I’m not going back there! As long as my father is around, I can’t–”

“Don’t you think maybe that’s why your mother is holding on?” Arnav interrupted.

She didn’t follow.

“As long as you and your father are at loggerheads, you mother won’t be at peace… so maybe it’s time both of you sorted out your differences?”

Khushi bit her lip, forced into thought.

Could that really be it? There was no denying that Arnav’s point made sense. Her mother had been the bridge that kept her and her father together. Perhaps even in death, Garima wanted that, to see her daughter and her husband united.

“What are you thinking?” Arnav asked. His eyes were watching her carefully.

Khushi sighed. “Nothing… I don’t really have an answer to this situation.”

Because there was no way her father would ever forgo his beliefs and reconcile with her. That much she was sure of; but what that meant for her mother, she didn’t know.

“It’s fine if you don’t have an answer,” Arnav said kindly. “No one is expecting you to have everything figured out. All I’m saying is sometimes the solutions to our problems are very simple.... you taught me that.”

She had?

“You feel so miserable right now because you never said goodbye to your mother, because somewhere you feel guilty that even though she is technically alive, you have been classifying her as dead.”

Khushi was stricken. “I did what I thought was right...”

“Don’t you think she knows that? She is your mother, she knows just how desperately you want her to be with you and perhaps, she is making it happen the only way she can.”

“So you want me to let her go?” she asked, horrified. “How can I ever be okay with her being dead?!”

“You will never be okay with it Khushi... you will only get better at managing it. But by avoiding your mother or that house or your issues with your father, you are only giving your mother more cause to stay. One day, you will have to face them, don’t you think?”

Khushi was quiet. That one day will have to wait… after so many years she was finally having a life worth living for. Why would she put all of that in jeopardy by talking to her father? Couldn’t she be selfish for a bit longer and enjoy the moment for what it was?

“Okay enough of the heavy talk,” Arnav said unexpectedly. Perhaps he understood all of the conflicted thoughts running through her head and decided not to confuse her even more. “I made so much effort to cheer you up, but it seems the opposite is happening.”

Khushi smiled, happy for the change in topic. “You did cheer me up. Thank you... I still can’t believe you got me kulfi.”

“I made it... took me three trials to get it right actually.”

“Three trials? But how did you know you got it right? You never had kulfi from that stall before, did you?”

He leaned in, so that he was looking directly into her hazel colored eyes.

“I know you,” he murmured, his breath fanning her face. “So how can I not know what you like?”

It was the omelette all over again. He just miraculously knew what she would like.

“So basically,” she said clearing her throat, unsettled with the sudden proximity. “You’ll never tell me what addictive things you are adding to my food?”

“It’s FDA approved if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“Ha ha... very funny. Can I eat my kulfi now?”

He grinned and retrieved their bowls from the table. “Sure, I hope you like kulfi milkshakes just as much though.”

Khushi chuckled in answer.

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