Chapter 24 : Rondi Akhiyaan Haule Se

The transition from the chaos of the Wadhwa mansion to the sterile, pressurized quiet of the Obstetric ICU (OB-ICU) happened in a blur of spinning wheels and panicked breaths. Dr. Sonal, alerted ahead of time by Ishaan, was already waiting at the double doors when the stretcher crashed through the entrance.The immediate reality of the high-risk twin pregnancy was visual and brutal. Maysha lay completely unresponsive, her face a ghostly, hollow grey as the nurses immediately secured a high-flow oxygen mask over her nose and mouth.

Dr. Sonal worked with practiced, military precision, her hands moving over Maysha’s abdomen to feel the iron-hard tension of the hypertonic uterus before pulling back the curtain.

When she stepped out to face the family waiting in the corridor, her expression was grave. "I am running the necessary tests right now," Dr. Sonal said, her voice taut. "Like I warned you during her sixth month, a twin pregnancy of this nature is exceptionally high-risk.After the severe muscle spasms she experienced back then from the physical strain of pulling Maira, I explicitly stated that she could not undergo any form of shock or stress . It would trigger this exact crisis. But right now, as a doctor, I have to focus on my job. I need someone to come with me to sign the admission and consent papers immediately."

Ayush, his hands still trembling from holding Maysha’s limp body, turned slowly to look at Maan. The words Maysha had spoken just moments before her collapse echoed through his mind—I choose Maan. He looked at Maan, his voice barely a whisper: "Maan."

Maan froze. A wave of suffocating conflict hit him. Deep down, he wanted nothing more than to be accepted by Maysha wholeheartedly, to have earned her love over these tumultuous seven months. But looking at Ayush, he couldn't shake the terrifying, crushing feeling that this monumental responsibility was being handed to him out of a hasty, impulse decision made in the heat of a family war. Yet, keeping Maysha’s word and honoring the defiance she had shown his father, Maan swallowed his fear. He stepped forward and followed Dr. Sonal to do the needful.

The wait was agonizing, but it didn't last long. After running the emergency scans, Ishaan was abruptly called away from the corridor and into the Multi-Disciplinary Room.

*

When Ishaan entered, his heart sank. A reknown general surgeon was already standing there, reviewing a digital chart. Perplexed and deeply alarmed by a surgeon's immediate presence in an obstetric crisis, Ishaan’s breath hitched. Before he could ask, Dr. Sonal walked into the room, her face tight as she debriefed the surgeon on the test findings. The surgeon listened grimly, gave a single, solemn nod, and turned his eyes to Ishaan.

"Let me know the final decision your family takes, Dr. Ishaan," the surgeon said, his voice clipped and professional. "Inform me the moment you decide. I shall arrange an Operating Theater right away and then you can take it from there Dr.Ishaan."

Ishaan stood in stunned shock, the clinical finality of the words paralyzing him for a split second. Nodding numbly, he forced his legs to move.

He walked out to the cold corridor where the fractured family was waiting and quietly guided them all—Mayank, Shaira, Maira, Ayush, Rishabh, Preeta, Siddharth, and Maan—into the Multi-Disciplinary Room.

The atmosphere inside was suffocatingly tense. Maira sank heavily into one of the chairs. Shaira immediately lent her support, keeping a firm, grounding hand on Maira’s shoulder. Maira reached up, placing one hand over Shaira's fingers while instinctively bringing her other hand protectively over her own baby bump, bracing herself for what they were about to hear.

"Ishaan, tell me what is the issue?" Maira demanded, breaking the silence. "Is Maysha okay? And the babies?"

Ishaan couldn't bring himself to speak the words. He looked down, his voice hollow. "Maira... Dr. Sonal can better explain it to you all. Dr. Sonal, please."

Dr. Sonal stepped up to the wall-mounted projector, dimming the room's lights as a stark, black-and-white ultrasound slide flared onto the blank screen.

"Maysha is currently unconscious and on stabilizing drips," Dr. Sonal began, her voice echoing in the quiet room. "Because she is unresponsive, the path of treatment cannot be decided by me alone. It depends on what is feasible for all of you. Listen to me very carefully. Maysha is in a state of severe physiological shock. Those symptoms you witnessed at the mansion—the sudden mechanical 'hitch' in her breath and the agonizing lumbar pain—were clear signs of a Hypertonic Uterus. Essentially, the old injury from her sixth month, where her uterine muscles were badly strained while pulling Maira, has been violently re-triggered by today’s emotional stress. The uterus is spasming so severely right now that it is acting like a vice around the babies. Because of this, and due to Intrauterine Growth Restriction (IUGR), fetus one's placenta is significantly smaller in size. Therefore, that baby's vital organs are incredibly weak."

Maan stepped closer to the screen, his jaw tight, his chest heaving. "Doc, please... can you explain this to us in layman's terms?"

"Okay," Dr. Sonal said, switching the slide to a dual-view image of the twin sacs. "Just look at this image on the screen. Based on their biological fathers, this baby here is Baby Khurana, and next to it is Baby Luthra. Right now, Baby Khurana is absolutely stable. But Baby Luthra is getting weaker by the day. Because of the previous spasms and the continuous maternity belt support Maysha has needed, the blood flow to Baby Luthra was already incredibly fragile. Today, under the weight of that confrontation, it completely collapsed. Twin A is currently in severe, acute distress. Their heart rate is dropping dangerously low." She paused, her eyes scanning the anxious faces. "If we do not perform an emergency C-section delivery right now, there will be severe, fatal complications."

"Do it, Doc! Do it!" Maan urged desperately, his voice cracking. "What on earth are we waiting for?"

Ayush stepped forward, his eyes wide with terror. "Doc... will Maysha be safe? Right?"

"Maysha’s vitals will stabilize once the pressure is relieved, but the babies are a different story," Dr. Sonal said honestly. "You need to understand that an emergency C-section at seven months is extremely high-risk. Doing it right now will put even the healthy Baby Khurana at risk of losing its life due to the extreme complications of premature delivery. To save one baby, we risk losing both. However, if we choose to wait to let Baby Khurana the healthy twin grow, we are essentially letting the Baby Luthra, the weaker one go. We have to act fast, because the longer we wait, the more we put Maysha's own life at risk. Therefore, before proceeding to the Operating Theater, I legally require the consent and signatures of both biological fathers."

A nurse stepped forward, handing a clipboard with the emergency authorization forms to Dr. Sonal, who immediately extended them toward Ayush.

Maan stared at the paperwork, his mind racing. "Doc, if we don't perform the C-section right now... what are the chances that the weaker baby survives inside?"

Dr. Sonal looked at him with heavy eyes. "Close to zero."

"And if we do it?" Maan pressed.

"Fifty-fifty."

Maan didn't hesitate. Seeing Ayush standing frozen, completely paralyzed by the numbers, Maan reached out and took the form directly from his hands. With a swift, decisive stroke of the pen, Maan signed his name on the line designated for Baby Khurana.

Ayush stood trembling, his eyes fixed blankly on the floor. His voice, when he finally spoke, was a hollow, broken whisper that barely managed to catch in his throat.

"Save your child, Maan," Ayush said, the words heavy with a profound, crushing despair. "Maysha chose you. In front of everyone... in front of your father, she chose you. In the very beginning, before she even knew about the twins or this medical condition, her first raw thought was that if it was your child, she’d consider an abortion. But then when she knew she carried my child as well, she didn't. She chose to love them both. And then you joined us... you stayed. You two developed a real bond, Maan. You grew to love each other through all of this. If only one of the twins can make it out of that room alive now... let it be yours. She loves you. She made her choice."

The words cut through Maan like a knife. Unable to handle the defeat in Ayush’s posture, Maan lunged forward, his hands gripping Ayush’s collar tightly. It wasn’t an act of malice or aggression, but a desperate, violent attempt to anchor a man who was actively drifting into total hopelessness.

"No! Don't you dare try to be mahaan (be great) by being martyr now, Ayush!" Maan hissed, his own voice cracking with emotion as he forced Ayush to look him dead in the eye. "The C-section is happening. It is happening even if there is only a fifty-percent chance! We pray that both of them survive, Ayush! This is exactly what Maysha would want. She would never, ever forgive us if we stood here in a sterile room and negotiated which life was more valuable to keep!"

Maan let out a shaky, jagged breath, his fingers slowly releasing their grip on Ayush’s clothes. He stepped back, his gaze drifting toward the projection screen, and then toward the heavy double doors leading to the OB-ICU.

"And regarding her choice?" Maan continued, a wave of painful, selfless clarity washing over his face. "That was my father’s venom talking, Ayush. He came there to humiliate us. He brought the media just to avenge his own tarnished reputation, because Siddharth bhai and I refused to live under his thumb as a family. He was trying to break me. Maysha didn't say those words because she was certain of her heart; she said them to protect me. She said them to prove to that monster that I can be a better father than he ever was to Malvika Di—the daughter he refused to accept because she wasn't his own blood.And that I could be a better husband than he was to my Mom by accepting his step daughter with all his heart. Maysha wasn't in the right state of mind, Ayush. It was a purely defensive impulse, and impulsive decisions always end in disaster."

Maan leaned his back against the cold, unyielding wall of the consultation room, his expression completely hollowed out by the truth he had been carrying.

"I know it’s surely not me, bud," Maan said softly, his voice dropping into a quiet, heartbreaking admission. "You’ve been the better choice, the better husband, and the true father material all along. She liked your presence during this pregnancy so much more than mine—I’m not blind, Ayush. It was only because I was legally and circumstantially tied to this journey that she had to tolerate me. She grew fonder of me, yes, but first love is first love. Even a second love can’t fulfill that space. If she hadn’t been forced to defend me against my father’s venom... she would have definitely chosen you."

Maan then turned his gaze toward Dr. Sonal, his expression hardening with defensive pride. "Doc, please don't refer to the babies as Baby Khurana or Baby Luthra. They are Baby Wadhwas, and they always will be."

With a heavy heart, Maan patted Ayush firmly on the shoulder, a silent signal urging him to do the right thing and sign the papers, before he turned and walked out of the room.

*

Downstairs in the bustling canteen area, not far from the hospital’s small, quiet mandir, Roshni stood with her phone on speaker. Siddharth’s voice filled the space between her and Malvika, who sat beside her so they wouldn't overcrowd the waiting room upstairs.

"So right now, Maan has signed the consent form for the C-section," Siddharth explained over the line. "We're just waiting for Ayush to sign it, so that both the kids can be saved—even if it means putting Maan's baby's life at risk to save Ayush's."

Raj, who happened to be pacing near the canteen area, caught the tail end of the conversation. His face contorted with immediate rage. "What is wrong with Maan?!" he shouted, his voice booming across the corridor.

Roshni’s eyes widened, and she quickly spoke into the phone. "Siddharth, I will call you back."

She cut the call just as Maan walked into the area, hearing his father's shouting echo through the walls. Malvika immediately stood up, her expression grim, and began walking toward the main corridor to find the hospital security guards.

"Please don't create a scene just like you always do, Mr.Khuranna," Maan said, his voice laced with exhaustion. "This is a hospital, for God's sake."

"Maan, how can you expect me to be calm when you just committed a massive blunder upstairs?" Raj hissed, stepping into Maan's space. "Putting our heir's life at risk for the sake of that fallen cricketer? When he was ready to sacrifice his own child for the sake of our heir, you and bahu could have lived a happy life without that Luthra baby!"

"Bahu?" Maan scoffed, a bitter laugh escaping his lips. "Mr. Khurana, Maysha and I aren't married yet. And as for her acknowledging me as her fiancé, that only happened because you forced her hand to prove that I could be a better father and husband than you ever were."

"Isn't that great, Maan? My words hit her so hard that she chose you!" Raj argued, entirely unfazed. "And just look at the plan of destiny now—Ayush's baby is too weak to survive. As for the media, I will personally ensure that no article or snap is published. Even if a video or photo leaked, I will file a complaint to take down everything on the internet. It will give you and Maysha a clear, clean path to get hitched and all our differences will be solved and we can live like a happy family."

"One more poisonous word from your damn mouth, Mr. Khurana, and it will be the end of it," Maan roared, his hands clenching into fists. "I feel terribly ashamed to call you my father. For the sake of your own blood grandchild, you are willing to risk the life of the woman who could have been your daughter-in-law, let alone Ayush's child."

Roshni stepped forward, placing herself firmly between Maan and Raj. "Maan, don't waste your energy on this man who doesn't even value Maysha. For the sake of maintaining peace and calmness around the hospital, it's best that the guards handle this."

"Bhabhi, I've already taken care of it," Malvika said, returning with a squad of hospital security guards in tow.

She pointed directly at Raj. "Guards, please take this man away. He has violated hospital policy by creating a public disturbance and posing a direct threat to a critical patient upstairs."

Raj gritted his teeth, his eyes flashing with fury as he looked at his daughter. "Malvika! How dare you have the audacity to oust me? To claim I am a threat to my own grandchild's mother?"

Maan stepped up beside his sister, his voice cutting through the tension like a knife. "She is my sister, goddammit, and the bua to my kids! She has every freaking right over them.For years Malvika Di has never demanded her rights from you, but today she has spoken up only for the sake of Maysha and my kids.That's my Di for you. Guards, oust him out, and make sure he doesn't get entry back into this hospital for as long as we are here."

The security guards grabbed Raj's arms, forcefully escorting him toward the exit. Raj struggled against their grip, throwing a venomous look back over his shoulder. "You will regret this, Maan! You will regret this!"

Once the shouting faded, the crushing weight of the entire day finally caught up with Maan. He turned away and walked slowly toward the small hospital mandir. Roshni stepped forward, intending to touch his shoulder and give him a comforting squeeze, but Malvika gently caught her arm, shaking her head.

"Let him be, Bhabhi," Malvika whispered softly, watching Maan's retreating figure. "He needs some time alone to process what he's feeling. In the presence of Bappa, he will feel light."

*

The heavy wooden doors of the hospital temple swung open. Inside, the world slowed down. The air was cool, carrying the faint, comforting scent of sandalwood incense and fresh marigolds. Maan took a few unsteady steps forward, his boots clicking softly against the polished marble floor before his knees gave out.

He sank onto the floor, kneeling directly before the pristine, white marble idol of Lord Ganesha. Bappa sat enveloped in a warm, golden aura, His calm eyes looking down with absolute serenity. But Maan’s mind was a chaotic storm, and as he stared at the deity, the dam broke. The images, the sounds, the sheer weight of the past few months came crashing over him in a relentless wave of memories.

In the quiet sanctuary, the past played out against the backdrop of his mind like a cinematic reel.

Rondi ankhiyan haule se

Hanju vi sukh gaye ni saare

He saw her at the dance studio, vibrant and laughing during that initial reel shoot, her eyes bright with a spark that had instantly challenged him.

He remembered the transition—the days of being her boyfriend, the stolen kisses. The moment when they were watching the sky bleed into shades of gold and amber while awaiting the sunrise by Marine Drive, her head resting lightly against his shoulder.

Kehndi aaja ikk vaari

Lagg ja gale dil pukaare..

The stolen moments during Palki’s mehendi ceremony, hiding away at night by the secluded dome terrace.The moonlight being witness to their stolen kisses. The moments, he danced with her on Bhole Chudiyaan, the close proximity and then the quirky dance steps dancing to lines of Gallan GoodiyanAnd then, the night of Rudra and Palki’s bachelor and bachelorette party—the raw intensity of making love on those same plush cushions by the pool, sealing a bond they didn't yet fully comprehend.

De sajaayein mujhe

Then came the darkness. The memory of his own coldness stung. He remembered the cruel, calculated moment he tried to block her number the second he realized she was no longer leverage to get back at Maira. He closed his eyes tight, a grimace breaking his features.

Le duaaein meri

The memories shifted, turning softer, heavier, and deeply intertwined with another presence.He remembered the utter vulnerability of sitting by her hospital bedside when he first found out about the twins. The initial shock had melted into an unspoken pact. They became a trio. Ayush and Maan, standing like pillars on either side of her through every milestone of the pregnancy.

Karle jo bhi sitam

Naa ja door kahin..

Maan shifted, sitting cross-legged on the floor, and pressed his palms flat against his face as the memory of the fifth month took over. A terrifyingly high fever had gripped her. Ishaan and Maira were away in Delhi for the Satsang, and Ayush was stranded at his office due to torrential rains and flooded roads. Maan had stayed the entire night alone, changing wet cloths on her forehead, listening to her ragged breathing. It was there, in the dim light of a raging storm while she was only partially conscious, that his true love confession had slipped from his lips.

Jeeun main toh tere sahaare

Rondi...Oo....

He remembered the pure joy of the first baby kick. The three of them had been crowded together on the bed, laughing through a romantic comedy on the laptop, when the tiny, sudden thud against her belly stopped time.

Pyaar waale dhaage

Tujhme hi baandhe

Kyun yeh kuch nahin

Dikhe tere aage..

Jiss bhi gali mein

Chaleya yeh bhaage

Tujhko hi dhoondein dil

Tujhme hi laage..

The sixth month brought the midnight dessert runs. Driving down the empty by lanes of Anderi leading to the orange-lit stretches of Airport Road, dancing around the terminal departure restaurant, and then the moment of him stealing glances of her as she relished every morsel of the Matilda cake at a Marine Drive cafe.He reminisced the dance by the promenade of Marine Drive, overviewing scenic night view of the vast,dark sea.

Tu vi keh kuch kabhi

The warmth of the memory shattered as the recent trauma replayed. He remembered the sheer terror when Maysha risked herself to save Maira, triggering those violent spasms. He and Ayush had been anchored to opposite sides of her bed, each holding one of her hands, unified in their fear of losing her.

Dil ki baatein sabhi

Jo tu dekhe mujhe

Waqt thaamu wahin..

And then the moments of yesterday's beautiful afternoon replayed,he had taken her to lunch at the outhouse where Siddharth and Roshni stayed. He could still see the look on her face when he showed her the nursery he had spent weeks building with his own hands.

Vaade main nibhaaun saare..

Then today just hours ago, in the golden afternoon before the disaster back at the Wadhwa Mansion, he and Ayush had stood together, proudly presenting the collective nursery they had designed as a team. He remembered kneeling down, the two of them kissing her high baby bump, promising the world to the lives inside.

Rondi ankhiyan haule se..

And then came the moment she said,“I choose Maan…”

Her voice echoed through the temple walls, piercing his soul.

Hanju vi sukh gaye saare..

Oo...!

"Why, Bappa? Why am I the one destined to face seeing my love slipping away from me? First Maira, and now Maysha?" Maan’s voice cracked, a desperate whisper rising in the empty room.

"Yes, she said she has chosen me. But her words didn't sound like she meant them. You know everything, Bappa. You know that Maysha has always felt the love that feels like home with Ayush, and not with me."

A soft footstep echoed behind him. Siddharth walked into the mandir, his face etched with gravity, and placed a grounding hand on Maan's trembling shoulder.

"Ayush has signed the consent papers for the C-section, Maan," Siddharth said quietly, offering what comfort he could. "Now, it's all in Bappa's hands."

A profound wave of relief washed over Maan, knowing that Ayush had put his own heartbreak aside and was willing to risk his own biological child just to give Maan's baby a chance at life. Because Maysha had chosen Maan in front of everyone, Ayush was choosing to be completely sacrificial, letting his own pain take a backseat for the sake of the woman he loved.But he didn't go through with that ultimate sacrifice; he kept Maan's word, put aside his mahaanta, and did the right thing by signing for both.

Turning back toward the serene idol, Maan pressed his hands together in a fierce, tearful plea.

"Please, Bappa," Maan begged, his shoulders shaking as the tears finally flowed freely. "Please save both my kids. And please... save my Maysha."

*

The double doors of the OB-ICU swung open with a sharp click, and the quiet of the corridor shattered as the medical staff began moving the stretcher toward the Operating Theater.Ayush stepped forward, his legs heavy, his heart hammering against his ribs. He didn't see the machines or the busy nurses; his eyes were locked entirely on Maysha. She looked so small beneath the hospital sheets, her face pale, the oxygen mask fogging with her shallow breaths.

Instrumental

He reached out, his trembling fingers finding her hand. Her skin was cool, but he squeezed it tightly, walking alongside the moving stretcher as if his grip alone could keep her anchored to the world. He wanted to tell her to fight, to tell her that he was right there, but the words trapped themselves in his throat.

The stretcher reached the threshold of the Operating Theater. The automatic doors slid open, revealing the harsh, blinding white lights of the surgical suite. A nurse gave Ayush a sympathetic but firm look, indicating he could go no further.

Ho..haaye…...

As the doctors pushed the stretcher inside, Maysha’s fingers slowly loosened. Her hand slipped completely from his grasp, falling limply onto the mattress as the heavy doors sealed her away from him.

The silence that followed was deafening, and in the hollow emptiness of his chest, a haunting melody seemed to echo, matching the rhythm of his breaking heart:

Ayush leaned his head against the side door of the OT, his eyes closing as the floodgates of memory opened.

Dil rove jind rove jadd yaar nazar na aawe

Akhiyan nu samjhawan bin soye raat bitaave...

He was taken back to their very first lunch date—the nervous laughter, the shy glances, and the effortless comfort that had defined the beginning of them.

Then the scene shifted to the roaring crowds of the stadium. He remembered the adrenaline of the World Cup matches. Every time he crossed the boundary line, reached a milestone, or raised his heavy cricket bat to the sky, his eyes would scan the stands until they found her. That lift of the bat wasn't for the crowd; it was a private signal to her. He remembered the quiet aftermath of those victories—the private sanctuary of his hotel room, holding her close, celebrating away from the flashbulbs and the cameras.

But the memories grew bittersweet. He recalled the painful ache of the wedding festivities for Rudra and Palki. During the mehendi and the sangeet, she hadn't been by his side. He remembered the suffocating wall of jealousy that had hit him when he saw her dancing with Maan, the bitter realization of how complicated their lives had become.

Dil rove jind rove jadd yaar nazar na aawe

Akhiyan nu samjhawan bin soye raat bitaave...

Yet, hope had returned. He remembered the night of the bachelor and bachelorette party. In the quiet intimacy of her bedroom after the chaos died down, they had made love—a raw, deep reconnection that, unknown to them then, was their breakup sex. It was a passionate, heartbreaking farewell to what they once were, a moment that had made him believe they could survive anything even as the ground shifted beneath their feet.

Main hassda vi ro ro ke

Ve door tere ton ho ke...

The memory of her pregnancy unfurled in his mind, tender and heavy with emotion.

He smiled faintly through his grief, remembering the fourth month. It was rougly around 2: 00 AM, and Maysha had developed the most bizarre food craving. While she stood in the kitchen preparing the snack, she had winced from the pressure on her spine. Ayush had stepped up behind her, gently lifting her baby bump to ease the strain, and he could still hear the long sigh of relief she had let out against him.

The warmth faded into the memory of the storm when Maysha was in her 5th month of her pregnancy. He remembered the absolute terror of being stranded at his office due to the torrential rains and flooded roads while Maysha burned with a high fever. When he finally managed to reach her the next morning, his heart had twisted to find Maan asleep by her side, exhausted from watching over her all night. Ayush had gently shaken Maan awake, sending him to get some rest so he could take over the vigil.

Haal mere dil da yaara kivein main kava...

Then he remembered a rare moment of peace on her bed. He, Maan, and Maysha were crowded together, watching a romantic comedy on a laptop. Suddenly, Maysha gasped. She caught both their hands, pressing Ayush’s palm to one side of her bump and Maan's to the other, making them feel the babies' very first kicks. In that single moment, their chaotic reality felt beautiful.

Ve biba tainu yaad karaan

Ve biba tainu yaad karaan

Then he remembered the 6th month... the sheer, paralyzing fright when Maysha risked herself to save Maira, triggering those violent, terrifying spasms. He and Maan had been anchored to opposite sides of her hospital bed, each holding one of her hands, completely unified in their agonizing fear of losing her.

Ve biba tainu yaad karaan

Main yaad karda rava...

The timeline moved closer to the present. He remembered the night before the Godh Bharai. He had taken her to his place for dinner, his heart on his sleeve as he showed her the nursery he had poured his soul into designing and building. It was there, surrounded by the pastel walls and the quiet promise of a future, that he had confessed his deepest feelings to her.

Ve biba tainu yaad karaan

Ve biba tainu yaad karaan...

And just hours ago, in the golden afternoon light at the Wadhwa Mansion, he and Maan had stood side by side, proudly presenting the collective nursery they had curated together as a team for the twins. They had knelt before her, both of them kissing her high baby bump, promising to protect the lives inside at all costs.

Ve biba tainu yaad karaan

Main yaad karda rava...

But then, the final memory hit him like a physical blow. The scene at the Godh Bharai replayed, the air thick with tension as Maan's father's words cut through the room, followed by Maysha standing tall in front of the entire gathering.

“I choose Maan…”

The words echoed in his mind, sharp and final. Even knowing the pressure she was under, even knowing Raj Khurana’s venom had forced her hand, the sentence lived under his skin, leaving him completely shattered as he stood outside the operating theater hoping for a miracle.