Chapter 19

The Morning After The Night Before

Chapter 19

It was stressful time for everyone, especially for Khushi and Armav.

The triplets had arrived, but were living in plastic boxes, devoid of human touch, in isolation. All the helpless parents could do was sit, watch, wait and pray. Each successive day hope grew stronger for the new parents. Their children were fighters, what else could they be they had Arnav and Khushi for parents.

Although after a week Khushi was allowed to go home -she chose not to living at the hospital with her three children.

Arnav found it lonely at Shantivan -he had expected a houseful of happiness and hope looking into the future; as always in his life there was never a moment of happiness unless it had been tinged with sadness. Here again the birth of his children had been clouded by the issues -would all three come home. If they didn't... what would happen to Khushi? What would happen to him? He had watched her at the neonatal unit with his children the love shone in her eyes for them, she had nicknames for them already.

For Arnav the whole situation was surreal, he had three children, neither him nor Khushi had been allowed to hold them, touch them. He felt all the worries of being a parent without any of the joys. A short nine months ago he had attended a wedding and met a gorgeous girl - got blindingly drunk -slept with her -had hazy memories of the event -got her pregnant -married her -and now they had three children. Somewhere along the journey he had fallen completely, wholeheartedly and irrevocably in love with her. She had somehow become the centre of his universe, his whole world revolved around her, what made her smile, laugh, worry and god help them who caused a tear in her eye. Now as he sat here thinking, his axis had tilted again now he had three little innocent lives as well to take care of. He felt something missing between them and him. He was a new father, when his children had been born, so had he - father and child were born together-yet he didn't feel like a father. He felt as though, fate were stealing from him again. The promise of happiness was so tangible he could almost taste his perfect world he had, a wife whom he loved unquestioningly and now he had three children. But his perfect world had stopped there. Although he had become a father -he had not become parent. Every time fate gave him joy with one hand she always left taking a lot more -leaving him a loser, always wanting more. He had grown used to that feeling and hence hardened his heart against further injury- yet somehow Khushi had found the chink in his armour and crawled in making a permanent position in his heart and now she had dragged three tiny lives in as well.

Arnav was at work - finding it hard to focus on his current project as his mind was filled with thoughts about his family. In such a short time Khushi had made such an impact in his life -now that she was no longer there at night -he no longer slept peacefully. He had been sleeping peacefully for the last eighteen years alone without any hassles but now his bed seemed larger than ever before. He missed her -he had hugged her pillow to remind him of her. But there was no comfort in that- he just missed having her there. While Khushi was in hospital he had taken to sleeping on the recliner. He wanted back at home, back at his side. But Khushi chose to stay at the hospital with her children occasionally returning to Shantivan for a few hours to shower change pray and eat.

Why was his head so full of thoughts and images of her.

He picked up his phone with the intention of calling Aman to cancel his day- he was going to spend it with her and the children - you never know he might convince Khushi to go and sit in the gardens with him and watch her eat jelabies.

"Arnav -come to the hospital as soon as you can"

He phone made a lone slow annoying noise. The line had been disconnected. Arnav stared at the phone -had he just imagined Khushi's voice because he had been thinking about her or had she really been on the phone.

Arnav looked at the memory of his received calls -last call received was from Khushi. Arnav was galvanised into action; she had said come to the hospital.

He grabbed his keys forgetting his jacket told his PA that he had an urgent call from the hospital and to call Aman and Akash to handle everything till he called back.

"But sir... your jacket ..." The words were lost she was just speaking to empty space.

She had seen his eyes and the worried look on his face. How he had changed since he had been married. She actually liked him and felt sorry for him. Khushi maam had been the making of him into a human. He actually smiled and said thank you when she did something for him. Since his children had been born she had seen further changes in him- he was almost likeable and she could see the lines of worry etched into his face.

Previously she had never been able to read his emotions -there had been two faces she had know frozen, unemotional or angry. Now it was all different it was as though the iceman had melted.

Arnav didn't wait for the lift he took the stairs, two at a time till he reached the neonatal unit in record time. He saw Khushi there.

"Arnav sit down have you run all the way?"

All Arnav could do was nod as he got his breath back.

"You called said it was urgent - what's wrong ?"

Khushi saw fear reflected in his eyes, worry etched into his face how had she found him. It no longer bothered her that she had no memory of their first meeting she had since then made plenty more to fill the corners of her brain. This man had invaded her heart and mind- she had missed him terribly at night when she slept alone at the hospital. Khushi smiled as she remember the first time he had brought her flowers -yellow roses - he had never brought her any ever since they had made her so ill.

She smiled at him, and brushed his hair back into place and hugged him. Then quietly and gently kissed him on his lips, whispering "You worry too much"

Arnav gazed down at her confused not letting her out of his embrace- "They said I could hold the children today they are all going to be disconnected and switched to just normal cots but still in a high dependency unit. Do you know that our children are over a month old and we can hold them for the first time today. I didn't want you to miss this moment. I am sorry if I worried you"

Arnavs heart soared with joy and happiness, that feeling that he was missing out on something was that he had not been able to hold his children.

"Arnav we can't take them home yet but we can hold them"

"Small steps Khushi -we will take them home soon -all of them and you! I miss you "

"Arnav we still have no names for them"

"We will - we just haven't had time to discuss their names - we just haven't had time-Khushi how are you feeling today?"

"Excited !"

Arnav groaned, would she ever be able to understand him. "Not about the babies, in yourself, how are you doing?"

"Arnav I am fine my scar is all that's left; it's a bit sensitive to touch but that's all. It's going to take me another two months I think before I get the all clear for any fun filled activities"

"Khushi I wasn't thinking about that- I was thinking about you!"

"I know -but I was!"

Arnav stared into her eyes and saw the mischief lurking behind the surface something he had not seen since before the birth of the triplets. He felt a familiar stirring in his groin area.

"Khushi -stop it !-please..." He took one step back from her " We are in a hospital ,in front of our children -and YOU are not ready for this yet ! You still have a lot more healing to do - Sheenu said at least three months of abstinence, was her prescription of order to ensure that you were completely and fully healed ."

"Sheenu was always one for spoiling my fun !"

Arnav shook his head. "You are absolutely crazy- I wouldn't have it any other way. There is only one thing I would change about the last nine months"

Khushi looked startled and held her breath as she knew he was going to tell her in the next breath. Would it be having to marry her, having three boys with her, losing his freedom to be able to chase the next item with a set of great pins on her. Being tied to her and their boys.

"I have very little memory of that night that led to all these" pointing at his children and "you have none- that is my only regret -nothing else Khushi-I can't imagine my life without you or them"

Both individuals lost themselves in each other till they heard a persistant coughing and eventually their names being called " Khushi, Arnav -time and place guys- its only just been a month Arnav I'm reminding you the clock still ticking you have another two months' to go"

For the first time in his life Arnav Blushed and looked mortified he wouldn't let Khushi go till all his body responses had returned to respectable. Khushi was an imp doing this to him. Khushi face was as red as red could be as she tried to step away she felt Arnav's persistant hold on her.

She looked up at him gazing into his eyes realising as he ground his hips into her the reason he was not letting her go. She silently mouth "Ohhh"

Soon everybody was there the paediatrician in charge unhooked the first baby and picked him up and handed him to his mother.

For Khushi it was a terrifying moment, her heart went boom boom boom , she was sure that Arnav could hear it.

Raizada one had the courtesy to open his eyes and stare up at his mum feeling her love and security that those arm's provided he turned to burrow his head in her breast breast looking searching and then slowly drifted off to sleep secure in the knowledge that he was safe -there was no need to cry or raise concern. This familiar face he knew how to control if he needed anything -all he had to do was cry and she would coming running to be at his beck and call.

Khushi felt the rush of emotion and love at being able to hold her son for the first time. She couldn't believe the intensity of feeling that she had for this individual. How could she love him anymore than she already did-but she did. Tears fell from her face.

She passed him onto Arnav who was speechless. For the first time in his life he let his audience see his emotions -there was no need to hide behind an icy facade, behind a wall of anger. The intensity of his emotions was visible for the world to see and he was not scared for them to be able to witness that.

Turn by turn each child was released from their wires and tubes and held by mother and father and then Sheenu.

"Soon you will get to take your new family home. This is the quietest you will ever see them.

Make the most of it"

Arnav looked at the bedlam in the nursery. All three oh his children were up and causing chaos , one was screwing up his face ready to scream; Arnav bent down and swooped him into his arms. "Don't you dare scream -you're mum's sleeping look at those bags under her eyes- you're going to make her sick if you carry on like this Ever since that momentous day.There had been anything but Shanti at Shantivan. It had been four months since the triplets had been brought home.

Arnav recalled Sheenu's famous words "This is the quietest you will ever see them.

Make the most of it"

Enough was enough -he had to do something. Khushi wouldn't be able to carry on much longer like this. Both of them needed time