Chapter 4

SS: Storm Within by TINA!

Part 4--How do you say goodbye to the one you love?

The following night, Khushi found herself standing once more before the oak door of the study, her hand hesitating to knock.

How would he react today? she wondered. He'd ignored her all day, his cold indifference cutting into her, scalding her with the knowledge that no matter what happened, she would end up hurting her husband. Perhaps even destroying him.

She couldn't bear the thought of it. She had to fix things between them. But how? Time was running out. Only a month remained now.

A meager thirty days or so to say goodbye.

A muffled sound pierced her ears. Khushi's face drained of all color as she realized it had come from within.

"Arnavji!" She pushed open the door, darting inside.

He could not react fast enough this time. Khushi saw it all: his face wet with tears, his shoulders heaving as he silently sobbed.

She couldn't bear it. In a heartbeat, she was next to him, drawing him into her arms.

Arnav tried to move away, to regain control, but he could not. He felt powerless. As she tugged him closer, his arms seemed to have a mind of their own, winding around her burgeoning waist as if he'd never let go. His tears marred the pale pink of her maternity dress, his face pressing against the place where their child grew.

"Shh, Arnavji.. Please, love.." She pressed kisses to his bent head, her hands massaging over him. "Just like you can't see me cry, I can't see you like this."

He gazed up at her, tears clinging to his eyelashes. "You chose this. This is nothing compared to what's to come. Right now you're with me: warm and alive. One month from now, you won't be.."

His voice broke over those last words; his shoulders sagged in her grasp.

"Arnavji--"

"Leave me. Please.. If you ever loved me at all, leave me now."

Tears escaped her eyes as she stepped away, her breathing awry. She was about to reach for the doorknob, when a sharp pain shot through her, directly over her chest. She'd never felt anything like it, its intensity made her cry out.

Her husband was at her side at once, his eyes worry-filled and afraid. "Khushi! Khushi, what is it? What happened, love?"

She felt too weak to stand, leaning against him. As Arnav lifted her, laying her on the sofa, she flinched against the pain.

"I'm call the doctor," he said as he straightened. "I'll be right back."

She grabbed his wrist before he could step away. "No, I'm okay. The pain is fading."

Arnav looked uncertain still, his posture tense.

Khushi tried to smile at him. "Seriously, love. I'm okay. Don't leave me."

He couldn't. He kneeled beside her, his hand trembling as he brushed back some sweaty tendrils from her temple.

"Are you sure?" His voice was gruff, but his gaze was so tender, it warmed her heart.

"Yes. Just stay with me. And whatever you do, don't stop touching me."

You didn't need to ask, he almost told her. He couldn't stop. His hand stroked over her face: over her eyelids, cheeks, and lips with such gentleness it was as if he worried she might break if he pressed too hard.

"Arnavji, will you give me something?"

He paused mid-stroke, nodding. "Anything. You know you only have to say it."

"Kiss me.." she whispered, setting her hand atop his. "Kiss me goodbye."

He shook his head, tears in his eyes. "I can't. I can't ever say goodbye to you."

She was crying too. "Then just kiss me.. like you did last time.."

He knew at once what kiss she was talking about. Months ago, she'd come to his study just like tonight. He'd never forgotten that bittersweet night, his every memory still intact:

The signs of her pregnancy were quite visible, her abdomen jutting out slightly from her white robe. Her complexion was a bit sickly appearing, but she looked heart-stoppingly beautiful, nibbling on her bottom lip as she stared at him.

It had been two weeks since he'd changed, showing her his hatred, not his love.

"I know you love me," she said. "And I want you to know that I love you too."

"If you loved me, you wouldn't be leaving me."

Tears shone in her eyes. Without replying, she went to him, kneeling on the carpet beside his armchair.

"I hope and pray that I don't leave you. But even if I do, I'll always be watching over you and our child."

Arnav shivered, staring at her with that same crestfallen expression of agony and billowing anger. "That's not good enough for me. I want you with me. I need you."

She clasped his hand, bringing it to her lips. "And I need you. You are the other half of me. But sweetheart, the baby is too. I cannot harm our child."

His lips twisted. "Then I have nothing to say to you."

It was a dismissal, but Khushi did not step away. "I know how angry you are and you have reason to be. But I need you.."

Arnav glanced away, fighting not to embrace her. "Go away, Khushi.." Go away, before I break completely.

"Not this time," Khushi insisted, her eyes twinkling at him. "Tonight might well be the last time we can be together.. like that. I need you.. please.."

He swore. "What do you want me to do? Forget everything? Forget that I'm to lose you?"

She could only nod. "Yes.. For tonight, can't we just forget everything? Can't we just be as we were before?"

He looked away, but she grasped his hand in hers. "Make love to me, Arnavji.. It might be the last time.."

Arnav's eyes locked with hers. She smiled at him tenderly, her hands going to her robe. It slipped from shoulders. She was bare beneath.

Neither of them moved for a moment, breaths suspended. And then she spoke, her heart in her eyes. "I love you. I will always love you."

His cry was pain-filled as he gathered her in his arms, taking her down to the carpet. His lips met hers in a fierce kiss. "And I love you. How much I love you.."

It was the closest to happiness either one of them had felt since the test results had shattered their world. Neither could get close enough, mouths urgently meeting, hands slipping across warm skin.

Pressing a kiss to his wife's heartbeat, Arnav had lost himself in her embrace, joining them as one.

She'd cried out, her nails raking his back. It had been sheer bliss, the two of them moving in an age-old rhythm, their bodies slick with sweat.

"Arnav!" she'd yelled at the peak of passion, muffling the cry against his shoulder. And he'd answered, her name escaping his lips as he caught her mouth in a deep kiss.

That had been the last time they'd kissed. The distance had only grown since then. The storm had only intensified. He could not stand to watch her die before his very eyes, and she could not pass on that fate to their child.

"Kiss me again," his wife whispered. "It's been so long.. I want to feel it again. Just in case--"

His heart sunk as she broke off, tears rolling down her cheeks. He knew what she'd been about to say: "Just in case it's the last time. Just in case this is truly goodbye."

Swallowing, Arnav bent his head, slowly descending over her. His breath washed over her parted lips, warming her. His heartbeat pounded against her.

Khushi slipped her hands into his hair, arching upwards. The first touch of his mouth nearly undid her. It was what she'd been waiting for.

He was being so gentle.. so very careful.. She pressed her lips harder against his, needing to feel him.

And then as he finally surrendered, kissing her as if he'd never have enough.. as if this might be their last kiss.. the realization hit Khushi:

How do you say goodbye to the one you love? You don't--because no matter what you say, it's never really goodbye. The ones we love never leave our hearts.

Final Part Below