Te aññamaññaṃ dūsesum

Te aññamaññaṃ dūsesum

(They defiled each other)

“If we get caught, we’ll both be expelled!” the bhikkhuṇī whispered to the sāmaṇera. “Let’s be quick!”

“Your name?” he stammered, uncomfortable with her initiative. Like all novice monks, he was accustomed to advanced nuns saluting him as their superior. Greetings in the saṅgha were impersonal, unsmiling, but her hungry eyes had seemed friends to his own.

“Kaṇṭakī - Thorn. My parents didn’t want me.”

The sāmaṇera sighed. “My name’s also Kaṇṭaka - Thorn. I don’t remember my parents. I grew up weeding fields, and escaped as soon as Upananda offered me pabbajjā.”

“Is this your first time alone with a woman?” Kaṇṭakī inquired.

Kaṇṭaka nodded. “I could never afford one. I thought, becoming a lifelong bhikkhu, I’ll lose nothing. No more backbreaking labour, anyway!”

“I was married to an old man before I followed ThullaNandā, so I know how it’s done.” Kaṇṭakī disrobed them both.

“I had an arrangement with another sāmaṇera who joined Upananda after me,” Kaṇṭaka confided. “Mahaka was his name. It began with us sharing body heat because our robes were always threadbare, and we lay down hungry every night. Upananda helps himself from the alms before we sāmaṇeras get anything.”

Kaṇṭakī’s hands paused. “This was before Gotama limited bhikkhus to training one sāmaṇera at a time?”

“Gotama created that rule because the saṅgha caught me with Mahaka!” Kaṇṭaka admitted. “They said we had defiled each other, the way men defile women. How? Mahaka was the first to make me feel glorious. He was my only friend.”