Chapter 5
"Tujhe Yaad Kar Liya Hai Aayat ki Tarah"
The lid from the small jar slipped through Zoya’s trembling fingers for the third time. She couldn’t believe what had just happened.
"If only you would like to join me.. you know for coffee"
“Yes, you are okay or yes you will join me for coffee”
WHAT HAD JUST HAPPENED? With a huge sigh, trying desperately not to get her hopes up and failing miserably, she poured his black coffee and placed it aside with her sweet milky coffee. She was such a hopeless pushover. Just because he had decided to pay attention to her in Allah Miyan knows how long, she had started making her own khayali pullao with coffee.
But amidst all this, Zoya had not missed the lines of strain that were etched across his forehead. She could only hope it was related to only very recent of their traumas: Mr.Rashid Ahmed Khan’s bail.
Asad sat silently in the garden under the quiet moonlit night. Quiet as it was, it couldn’t hold his mind silent. He should have known it was coming. As soon as he had heard the mention of yet another treacherous friend named Laddu from Zoya’s mouth, he knew there was only so much longer he could hold his feelings prisoner.
He wasn’t jealous of Zayn. He was just her best friend, right? Right?
But he was jealous of the man Zoya would hold in her heart forever. The one she would vow to love forever. The one she would give the privilege of seeing her smiles and prize her affection onto. Day after day. Everyday .The one she would say Qubool Hai to.
The two words only he wanted to hear. The two words he would do anything to hear if they were to come out from her lips.
He had never realized how strong these feelings of jealousy could get . It was like a volcano of anger and pain had just erupted inside him. The lava threatening to spill out any moment, baring his soul to the girl he loved.
No!
It would burn her! The toxic drops of his past scorching her future in the heat!
And even though he had come to realize the biggest love of his lifetime over the past couple months, he had also come to realize his biggest weakness. He could not stay away from her. The pain of someone else putting her arms around her was too much to bear.He was strong enough to ignore her; strong enough to be rude to her, but did not have the strength to see her belong to someone else.
Ya Allah! He had held his heart hostage for so long, he couldn't believe it was jealousy of all things that broke the barrier.
He wasn’t going to lie to himself though. He initially did have other plans, plans that revolved around leaving her or well trying to leave her alone, up until that fateful night.
A few nights ago...
Asad had just finished off reading the last page of the contract when he glanced up at the clock. Again.
Ah!Finally! It was 12.30 a.m. now. Zoya was usually sound asleep at this point at night. He hurriedly shut his laptop off and silently tiptoed to the room opposite his. He didn’t need the relaxant cream anymore. He had heard Zoya felt much better now and had stopped using it altogether, something about its smell that she didn’t like.
He shook his head and smiled. She was such a child.
But because he had never intended to get caught into his own night endeavour, he decided to forget the cream altogether even though it wasn't his best interest.
He tried to question himself, of what was becoming of him? He never intended to be a peeping tom. He certainly wasn’t one. Then why, even after she didn’t need his little medical aftercare, was he in her room?
What would happen if she were to open her eyes right at this moment. How could he ever explain to her that just looking her beautiful face eased all his worries?How could he tell her that he wasn’t able to sleep a wink since she had stopped crossing his path? Just how important it was for him to melt in the depths of her chocolate eyes, to relish the dent of her cheek whenever she smiled.
“Asad”, Zoya’s voice rang clear as a bell in the entire room.
Asad stopped breathing. A chill ran down his spine when he heard her say his name.
He had just made a sick joke to himself of what would happen if she saw him being a complete freak in her room. And now his worst nightmare was becoming true.Would she order him to never show his face again? What would he do if she did?He can certainly convince her to at least stay here while she was in India? Or maybe Ammi can just tell her to….
“Asad”,he heard her say again
His forehead crumpled up in confusion this time.He could make out that her eyes were still closed from whatever moonlight filtered into the room. She was breathing evenly. Zoya looked very much asleep.
“Care! just want…care”, she sighed and rolled away from Asad’s side.
She was dreaming.
Of Him.
His heart stopped beating altogether and picked up in double time. It thudded and paced in his chest. Zoya had a slight smile playing on her lips now. She was dreaming of him and it wasn’t even a nightmare. She wanted him to stay with her and care for her, there in her dream. The feeling that took over Asad at that moment was inexplicable. For a long moment he drowned in it.
Yes, he had a resolve. A resolve to stay away from her. To protect her from the shadows of his past. But only because he believed it would hurt her. But what if pushing her away was only going to hurt her more in the process. And himself. How would he fare then? How would they fare?
He had known from the night he had seen Zoya book tickets for New York, his resolve lay in shreds in front of his very own eyes.The constant Laddu cheerleading in his house ate at him. Even though she didn’t allow him in her presence, all he heard from Najma were stories about this best friend of her.
He had never experienced a pain so profound, an agony so robust. It would cause him physical pain if Zoya were to ever walkaway from his life. And he knew that it wasn’t in his power anymore to let her go. It never had been.
The clinking of two coffee cups against each other brought him out of his epiphany. He looked up to see Zoya standing near the edge of the bench, her face unsure. She sat down when he pointed to the space beside him.
And the seconds ticked by.
“Thanks, for the coffee”, Asad said finally breaking the silence. Zoya shyly murmured a faint welcome.
“So….”they both started at the same time and then awkwardly stopped.
The silence descended the empty space again, only the faint whisper of wind across the tree tops audible now.
A shadow appeared across the door a little far away.
“How is your foot now?” , Asad tried to break the silence again.
The shock of betrayal from his best friend had been so cavernous, he hadn’t realized what took over him to invite Zoya to have coffee with him and now he didn’t know what was to say to her regardless. He wasn't quite ready to confess his haal- e- dil just yet. He wondered if he would ever have enough faith and courage one day to do so.
“It’s much better. Thanks”, Zoya managed to spit out. Allah Miyan! When had she become such a huge mess of nerves? She was stuttering and spluttering like a nai naveli dulhan. Ridiculous.
But she couldn’t help but shake off the weird anxious vibe that came off of Asad. Something was terribly wrong. She could feel it.
“How are you doing? I mean.. with your Abbu..”, it was the last thing she had wanted to bring up but she had to instill some kind of reaction from him. He just seemed to be frozen in one position, his eyes fixated on the grass swaying in the gentle breeze of the night.
He surprised her by being calm.
“I am okay…now” And he was. Considering the fact that his childhood friend had turned out to be a calculated devious witch of a woman, he couldn’t stay angry at the surprise bail of his father for too long. Not when his Ammi so firmly believed that he was innocent.
“I am sorry, Zoya”, he blurted out of nowhere. A shiver ran down her spine hearing her name on his lips.
“I know I have been very rude to you since the past couple days and I regret that”, he continued in a soft pleading voice. Zoya had forgotten how to breathe by now.
“But I just wanted to thank you for everything you did for my family. For saving my Ammi’s life. For being brave enough to stand up for her when I couldn’t”, he continued, the full force of his eyes turned on her now.
She slowly counted to ten in her head before she could breathe ... to speak.
“I love phuphi as much as you love her…she is like the mother I never had”, Zoya admitted her voice cracking with emotion.
“Still I am thankful”
“You are welcome”
“So when is your friend coming?” Asad asked trying not to put too much pressure on the word friend.
Aww! Look at Mr.Khan trying to be all polite. But she hadn’t forgotten his reaction from when the news broke.
“It’s okay Mr. Khan, he won’t be comi..”
“It’s just that I thought maybe it would be nice” he almost hissed the word out “for him to join us on the road trip Najma had been talking about instead of the impractically long day trips I heard you were planning.”
Zoya would have bristled in anger at the thought of him doubting her capabilities to plan and prance around the city if her thoughts were any coherent. Who was this man? And what had he done to her stuck up Jahapanah.
Asad, on the other hand, knew what she was about to say. That he wont be coming into the house.
He’d rather she killed him instead.
He was not going to let an unknown man be anywhere near her — even though they were best freakin friends — at-least not away from his watch. He knew he sounded like a ridiculous tyrant but the girl sitting in front of him was too precious to lose. And not to mention she was too innocent for her own good.
Asad might not know her friend but he knew men. And he knew the effect Zoya would have on any hot- blooded male, however much of a friend he claimed to be. He couldn’t leave her alone with him all day long. She was his.
He had actually thought it all through. He was going to suggest a family road trip. Najma had been gushing about the same recently and with his consent, it would be impossible to stop her pulling it altogether.
“Miss Faaroqui?” Asad wanted to roll his eyes at her. Her eyes were about to bug out of her sockets. She was so melodramatic sometimes.
“It.. it won’t be necessary. He wouldn’t be able to make it this time”, Zoya managed to answer.
"Oh!" It was much too vague of a response compared to the solace his heart felt.
If Asad could have danced, he would have. A rush of unfathomable relief spread through every part of him. Hah! The despicable creature called Laddu won’t be making an appearance after all. He failed to recognize how he could detest someone so deeply without even meeting him.
A huge grin spread across his face before he could hide it.
“Well, thanks for the coffee Miss Faaroqui. Have a good night”, Asad stated in a flat unemotional voice. He got up urgently and walked towards the house before the object of his affection could see that his eyes were dancing with unmasked joy… and so was his heart.
Zoya’s head spun in confusion. Mr. Khan was just being so cryptic today. Was he so depressed by everything that he had actually gone crazy? Ya Allah! I have to let Phuphi know about this bizarre behavior of his.
But unbeknown to her, her Phuphi had an idea or two about the same. The shadow moved again as Asad crossed the threshold to the house, having witnessed—the said and the unsaid— conversation between the two hearts on the lone bench outside.
Her mother instincts had told her that something was brewing between the surface.Something she couldn’t fathom. Something more to the story than it seemed.
And after having witnessed the happiness on her son’s face just now, she knew what it was. For days she had been worried about Zoya’s disappearances from the dining table.But now she knew she had nothing to worry about. The daughter she had prayed for, the wife she had wanted for her son had already stumbled her way into their lives with diet coke in one hand and pizza in the other.
And somehow managed to stumble into her stubborn son's heart as well.
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