Chapter 52

~52~

TW: ⚠️ mentions sensitive issues

They entered in and he shut the door.

"Anu?"

"Did Devika tell you why I divorced Mr. Shah?"

"He had an extra Marital affair with Kavya."

"Did she tell you how long was he having the affair?"

He shook his head.

"9 years.... 9 long years... and I was blind..."

"Anu..?"

"Did she tell you how I found the affair?"

He whispered.

"No."

"On our 25th wedding anniversary, we remarried, renewing our vows in front of our family. That night was supposed to be my suhaagraat. I was so excited, desperate and nervous even... he hadn't touched me in 17 years and he was about to that night. I did everything I knew back then to look beautiful for him that night. I walked down the corridor and opened the door thinking of ways to please my husband and in front of me... on the bed decorated for me... my husband was pleasuring another woman..."

As she said that, she felt a wave of nausea hit her as the image flashed before her eyes again. She rushed to the washroom to throw up and he followed her. He held her as she threw up and helped her wash. He made her walk towards the bed, propped up the pillow against the headboard and made her lean against it. Pouring a glass of water, he gave it to her. As she took a sip from the cup, he sat in front of her.

"Anu... it's over... he doesn't deserve your tears..."

"He doesn't but it doesn't change the fact that I was blind..."

"Anu... it was not..."

"How do you know? You weren't there, were you?"

"But I do know you... and I know the creep too..."

"But you didn't know me then... I was blind... oh so blind... he used to come late evey day, go for long business trips, never used to touch me, told me a million times how unsatisfied he was with me... yet I was blind oh so blind..."

He took in a deep breath.

"Anu... why are you thinking about this now? It's..."

"Because I don't want the same thing to happen again..."

He pulled back trying to comprehend what she had just said.

"Anu... do you mean to say I would..."

"No... oh no no no... you would never cheat on me... but you wouldn't tell me the truth either..."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning... one day if you wake up and find me inadequate... you would never tell me, would you?"

"I wouldn't because I would never feel like that"

"Anuj..."

"Anu... who told you that you are not adequate? You are more than adequate... You are the only reason I am alive today... and you think I would think something like that? I owe my life to you, you fool..."

"But we are not yet married..."

"So?"

"So... you really don't know how I am as a wife... what if I cannot satisfy your needs as a wife..."

The fear in her eyes made him understand her insecurities. He took her hands to his lips and kissed them.

"You have already satisfied me... you don't have to try anymore... you... just being by me... is all that I need..."

"But Anuj..."

He placed a finger on her lips and shushed her.

"Shhh... by the same logic that you just said... even you don't know me as a husband... maybe you won't be satisfied..."

She pushed his hand away.

"But that is not possible... the woman said she couldn't forget you after you... uh... were with her for an hour..."

He shut his eyes trying to gather the correct words to explain while she continued.

"And me... oh well... I have been told multiple times that I give no pleasure..."

His eyes snapped open.

"Stop..."

"Anuj... I..."

"You want to know?"

He took one hand of hers and placed it on his heart.

"Come close..."

"Anuj..."

"Do as I say...."

As she moved closer, she felt his heart rate increase.

"Closer..."

She did as he commanded and felt the throb increase.

"Closer still..."

As her breath fanned his face, he gave a sigh of pleasure.

"This is what you do everytime you come close... just come close... and you feel you cannot satisfy me? I yearned for the mere sight of you all those lonely years... and now that you are finally here... you feel you cannot satisfy me..."

A lone tear fell down her face.

"Will it be the same after... uh... after...."

"It will... why wouldn't it be? Anu, you have been living her for around 2 months now, we have been around each other and I still cannot bear the thought of an hour without you... Everytime you touch me, I wish you would linger your hands over me... just a little longer... I crave for you, long for you.... I just can't get enough of you..."

"Anuj... I am scared... I really am scared..."

"But why, Anu... why? I don't know about all those years... but now... I am certain you are blind..."

"Huh?"

"What else should I say? Can't you see how I crave to be with you? How I long every moment to be touched by you... by your beautiful fingers and these lovely lips... oh... Anu... Anu.. Anu... I want you so much... you and only you... and you say you are scared I won't be satisfied...."

As the tears streamed down her face, she whispered

"Sorry, sorry, sorry..."

He captured her lips in his letting her know what he truly felt taking total control for the first time not letting her sigh, gasp or think. She surrendered herself to his love as tears streamed non stop washing away the nightmares of the past. As they parted for breath, he lifted his hands and wiped off the tears.

"You are all that I will ever need... Promise me you will never doubt yourself again..."

She shook her head and he planted a kiss on her forehead. He got up.

"You need to rest... sleep..."

He turned to leave when she held his hand.

"Stay.... I want you..."

He sat beside her and she leaned on his arm. Her rested his head on hers and took her hand in his letting his thumb graze her hand tracing random patterns. After they had sat like that for sometime, she started

"Anuj..."

"Mmm?"

"Can I...."

"Ask.."

She bit her lips a little.

"She looked like she had wanted to continue way past the one hour you gave... why did you leave her?"

"Because my heart was already taken... I could never give her my heart nor the love she deserves..."

"You know... you could have tried... you would have made it work..."

He placed a soft kiss on her forehead.

"Could have... but I am glad I didn't..."

She nodded and lifted her face and planted a kiss on his jaw.

"I am glad too..."

She reached up and opened the top two buttons of his shirt. He raised his eyebrow.

"What? It's hot..."

He chuckled and pulled her close.

***